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This Mini PC Intel is Perfect for What I Needed – John Riggs
A terrabyte server for your gamer girls porn? He’s downloading every video that his favourite ladies upload. Plus all of their Instagram pictures. Plus all of their Twitter comments.
His long-suffering wife is yelling in the background, “John, can you please help me with the kids? The youngest one is banging his head into stuff again. And your two daughters are sons now.” “Sorry, honey. I have to work on my gamer girl archive. Talk to you next week after I come home from the latest nerd convention.”
This is a product that he received for free in return for a “review”. He even admits this. He says that he’s seen similar shilling videos for this exact same product. He also maybe just got straight up money for this. He has an affiliate link that earns him pennies for every click and if you actually buy the product through that link, he gets dollars.
0:30 – John Riggs thinks that this product would be good for Steam. He goes on to say that he gets Steam codes from other companies trying to get him to shill for their games and he can’t use them because he doesn’t have a “Steam Deck”. Or something.
Hey…John Riggs…do you own a COMPUTER? That’s all you need to run computer games. Steam sells computer games. It’s nothing special.
Saying that, you need a decent computer to play modern games. Everybody knows that. And this piece of shit that he’s showing is NOT a decent computer. This is not something that you want to play games on. According to somebody in the comments, it doesn’t even have a graphics card. What is this? 1995?
I remember back when graphics cards were a new thing. I never got one. I mean, who gives a shit? But people would buy dedicated graphics cards to play Doom or whatever. I thought, “Surely, it can’t make that big of a difference.” It probably did but I still somehow survived the 1990s and played Doom.
Then in about 2008, I bought a laptop. This was the first computer that I had in the UK. I had gone quite a few years without a computer. It was a difficult time. I had to watch tv like a caveman. And go to internet cafes to check my emails. But I finally amassed enough money to get a laptop. Big laptop. Like 19 inch screen or something.
So I get it home and my Polish roommate, who worked in IT, started talking about what a piece of shit it is. “It has an integrated motherboard. Everything is just on the motherboard. It’s like £50.”
Look, I don’t give a shit. I’m just happy to be able to check my emails at home and play these old games that I haven’t played in three years.
I got my last two computer from Chillblast. You can customise the computer that you want and then they build it. The idea is it’s for people who are too lazy and/or not nerdy enough to build their own computer. So you have somebody else do it.
I’m happy with the computers that I got. The last one lasted ages before the graphics card died. And it still ran modern games. I made sure to upgrade the RAM or…whatever to try to future-proof it. And you can tell them to put some cool lights in there and a racing stripe and you’re ready to go. No problems. And customer service is great.
Not an affiliate link. I’m not making a penny from that. That’s just genuine promotion. An oasis of truth in a world full of dishonest fucks like John Riggs.
0:45 – Then he suggests that he’s going to do “PCVR” stuff with this computer that doesn’t even have a graphics card. Good luck with that.
1:30 – John Riggs says that he gets his 14 year old neighbour to reformat his computer. To that neighbour, I suggest staying well clear of John Riggs.
3:30 – John Riggs goes on a bizarre rant about how he needs the computer to be “plug and play” and he doesn’t have time for those “big box” computers that take an age to put together.
What the fuck is he buying? I’ve never had a computer that takes a long time to set up. You get the computer. You plug your mouse in. You plug your keyboard in. You plug your monitor in. You plug the computer and the monitor into a powerstrip. And you’re done. You turn it on and it works.
4:15 – Now he’s talking about how easy it was to set up. But…he’s just talking about Windows. When you start a new install of Windows, they make you run through a bunch of bullshit. Create an account, I don’t want to create an account, create a password, shit like this. It’s not really anything to do with the computer.
5:30 – He’s playing something called Poppy’s Playtime. It looks like it took quite a while to load. And now it looks to be playing at like five frames a second. It’s some shitty indy game. Even this is barely playable on this piece of shit computer.
7:00 – Then he finishes the video by saying hey, it’s great. This is exactly what I needed. I needed a way to play my 15 Steam games.
God, this is fucking awful. The computer is a total piece of shit. And for whatever bizarre reason, John Riggs doesn’t seem to realise that just about any computer will run Steam. You don’t need a fucking “Steam Deck” like he seems to believe. I’ve been running Steam for 20 years. When did it come out? Okay, 19 years then.
How can somebody as fat and beared as John Riggs possibly be this clueless about computers?
Let’s check out his Twitter. Pad this out.
https://twitter.com/johnblueriggs
Did he get rid of his pronouns? I thought that he had his pronouns here before. He claimed that it’s totally normal in the state of Washington to tell people your pronouns. Uh huh. Sure it is.
He claims that he was in something called All Sorts. It’s a movie not noteable enough for Wikipedia.
There are scam affiliate links in his Twitter. And A LOT of them. This is shameful. His Twitter is more scams than it is actual messages.
Oh, his wife is on Twitch now.
https://www.twitch.tv/micheleblueriggs
REALLY annoying voice. And she’s playing Fortnite with…some guy. But I don’t think it’s John Riggs.
Oh, here’s John Riggs with Horseface. There’s a crossover I wasn’t expecting. She’s wearing half a top, of course. That’s always…revolting. Justin Silverman is there as well. And then just…two other guys. Maybe two guys from Screenwave? New interns? Who knows?
And then Horseface replied to this with…pictures of herself. Pictures of herself in half a top. What’s the relevance? Who gives a shit? She’s a fucking moron.
John Riggs posts a lot about food too. Sugary food that he’s purchased or wants to purchase. And sometimes Chinese food.
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Episode 67: Blonde ft. Crystal Quin – Reviewing History
This is episode 67 of a podcast on a channel that has 617 subscribers.
Well, I don’t know. You can’t expect to grow an audience overnight. They’ve only been doing this for a year. But it seems like a lot of work for…what? Is this ever going to take off?
You’ve got Anthony and Brian, the fat and fatter versions of the every man. And then Steve who somehow missed the memo that you’re supposed to a big fat guy if you want to talk about nerd shit. At least they all have beards. That’s a must. And they’re joined in this episode by special guest Horseface McGee aka Crystal Quin.
Well, maybe it will be good. I’m looking at the other episodes and they have some good movies that they talk about. Platoon. The French Connection. Mutiny on the Bounty.
Wow. I’m noticing the views. They sometimes don’t even reach double figures. That’s got to be disheartening.
You look at the blog, for example. I’ve been doing it for like four years or something, if you include the Reddit era. And you might think, “What’s the point? There’s like 100 people who come here, half of whom are the people who you write about.”
Yeah, but I’m just sitting at home in my underpants and writing this shit. Other than the domain name and server space, which are of minimal costs, I’m not spending money on this. Well, the banner was like $200. But that’s worth every penny.
These guys are getting together, buying camera equipment, lighting equipment, they’re spending a lot of time watching the movies, researching, doing 90 minutes reviews of the movies, editing the videos, uploading them. And for what? They’re not making a dime off of this.
Maybe they just like doing it. It just seems like a lot of effort.
0:30 – The one fat guy says that he’s a filmmaker and a teacher. Tell me more. How does he have time to make these videos when he already has two, presumably, demanding jobs?
2:30 – For reasons that escape me, the other fat guy starts talking about defecating on coffee tables as part of some sexual fetish. Why? What the fuck is going on here? I’m already lost.
This is some kind of attempt to woo Horseface? What? God. I’m not saying I’m Casanova but…god, this is fucking awful. Learn how to speak to women, you fat fuck.
4:45 – Horseface is talking about how she was a big Marilyn Monroe fan growing up. Uh huh.
You know, I’m reminded of something. I went to school with a guy. When he was in his mid to late 20s, he was imprisoned for murder. He was with some MILF and the husband found out so there was some beef and this guy ended up killing the husband, while this MILF and the husband’s son watched.
So he was in prison for, whatever, five to ten years. And when he came out he was all tatted up. This was a Mexican guy, by the way. He had face tattoos. Like Insane Clown Posse makeup. But tattoos.
He immediately finds a girlfriend. Looking like that. With no job. And right out of prison.
A few months later, after numerous violent altercations with this girlfriend, the relationship ends.
So he immediately gets into a new relationship. Looking like that. With no job. Right out of prison. And having beat his previous girlfriend so badly that she was running around town, a bloody mess, begging for help. This was all on Facebook.
This new girlfriend was a Marilyn Monroe enthusiast. She tried to look like Marilyn Monroe and act like Marilyn Monroe, falling well short on both counts. But this was her thing.
So I send her a message. “You know that that guy you’re with went to prison for murder, right? And he beat his last girlfriend so badly that she was running around town, a bloody mess, begging for help?” Something along these lines.
And she sends me a long message. “Yo yo yo. I know what he’s about, dawg. He told me everything. Mind your bees, homey. I know what I’m doing. And that bitch deserved it.” This was a white woman talking, by the way.
So I said, “Alright, just trying to help.”
A couple of days later, she sends a message, “Oh, I’m really sorry for the way I spoke to you. That wasn’t me. I just got excited. A thousand pardons.”
A couple of weeks later, she’s in the hospital.
I wonder what that guy is doing now. I lost track of him. I know that he took his Facebook down. This was like…I don’t know…15 years ago. He’s probably an investment banker now.
6:00 – Horseface is so fucking annoying. I can’t even quote from her. I just want to turn this shit off. There’s enough suffering in the world. Why should I put myself through this?
This video is over two hours long. I’m two seconds from stopping this.
You know, when Horseface shuts her fucking mouth, this isn’t so bad to listen to. It’s a real contrast. You actually WANT to hear these fat fucks talking after a screed from Horseface. Anything to get us away from Horseface and her incessant, vapid, brainless, narcissistic bullshit.
10:00 – Horseface is talking about how she sells pictures of her feet and how proud she is of this. This isn’t about you and your stupid bullshit, Horseface. Please stop talking.
Then she tells some bizarre…something…about how she doesn’t care about aliens because aliens aren’t going to pay her rent. What? And everybody looks confused as fuck by this comment. It’s the world’s dumbest woman.
12:30 – Horseface is talking about MySpace and Xanga. Let me tell you what the topic was. The guys were talking about how much American society changed during the 1940s and 1950s. And how the technology changed. Horseface “mmhmm’d” her way through it. Then she starts talking about MySpace and Xanga.
She could not be any more out of her depth. I think that this podcast is trying to be some kind of semi-intellectual thing. They’re talking about history and applying it to movies. You know, what was going on when Easy Rider was being filmed? How is it reflective of American society at the time? Shit like this.
So Horseface starts talking about Xanga. Loudly and vociferously.
13:45 – Finally, they decide to start talking about the movie.
16:15 – I’m done. I can’t listen to her any more. And she’s not shutting up.
Unwatchable. If you want to watch a semi-intelligent disussion constantly get derailed by a horse-faced woman, this is the video for you. Maybe they have decent stuff to say. But I can’t listen to Horseface any more. She’s fucking awful. And Newt is sitting in his apartment jacking off to this while his cat watches. That’s the most baffling thing about this. Newt can’t get over THIS. This fucking AWFUL, TERRIBLE, HORRENDOUS woman who doesn’t have a brain in her fucking giant equine head.
Don’t quit your day job, Horseface. Whatever that is. “Events”.
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Cool Japanese Snacks! -Zuvi
At first I thought, “So she’s going to show some Japanese candy. Who gives a shit? I’ve seen this a thousand times before.”
But then I thought, “Maybe I’m too jaded. Yes, it’s been done a billion times but so has everything else. Let’s give it a chance.”
No. She starts the video by saying that this is just some subscription box who sent her a free sample. This is dog shit. She couldn’t even be bothered to pick out some candy that she’s genuinely interested in. She’s just reviewing one of those shitty fucking subscription boxes. Fuck this lazy ass bullshit.
You can see this woman naked on the internet, by the way. Her links are here:
According to that, you have to be over 20 to see the pornographic stuff. Why? Presumably, that’s the law in Japan but she lives in the US.
According to her OnlyFans, you’re not allowed to print the images. Who’s doing that? Who’s printing pornographic images? Let me fire up my dot matrix printer so that I can print out this pornographic picture and enjoy it on the go.
When I first got the internet, I printed out a still frame from…what was it? Showgirls, I guess. That was pornography back in the day. No smart phones, of course. This was like 1998. So yeah, I printed this picture out. I think I had an ink jet printer but no color ink so it was just black and white. Then I folded the picture up and put it in my pocket and would use it in the bathroom. Masturbation was no easy task back then. Spanking it to black and white, poor quality, freeze frame printings of mainstream movies.
I had a few magazines as well. Playboy and Penthouse. Those sucked dick, and not in a good way. But I had some more explicit magazines like Busty Beauties and Gent: Home of the D Cups. Breast enthusiast magazines mostly. I also had some Asian stuff like Oriental Dolls. Not much, though. My entire pornographic magazine collection was about a dozen magazines.
And before that, we’re talking about scrambled Spice Channel stuff. We had some kind of descrambler but it only descrambled the image for like 30 seconds and then it would be scrambled for two minutes or so. It would alternate like that. So you really had to squint and time your ejaculation.
I also had a collection of just mainstream stuff. There was a TV listings magazine (not TV Guide but just whatever came in the newspaper) that had Dolly Parton on the cover. I had a milk ad that had Naomi Campbell in a little dress. I had some surprisingly risque ads from Cosmopolitan magazine. This sort of thing.
Anyway, for $45, you can watch this Japanese woman with no breasts and no personality watching hentai. No, I think I’m okay. Where does she get these prices? Who’s buying any of this?
For $150, you can have a 7 minute video of her having anal sex with her husband/pimp in what even she describes as a “messy room”. What? No. Are you out of your mind? I’m not paying anything for that.
She also seems to do a lot of self-fisting videos. Come on. That’s just gross.
That pimp/husband has no idea what people want to see. It’s not this shit, I’ll tell you that.
So anyway, she’s going to talk about candy now. From this subscription box. Let the good times roll.
1:15 – Rice crackers. Is this happening? Is how she’s starting the video? A video about Japanese candy and she starts with RICE CRACKERS?
I think that I’d rather see that revolting fisting video, frankly.
She’s showed about three items so far and they’re all video game related. This sucks. Don’t they sell regular candy in Japan?
9:30 – She says that she doesn’t chew gum because she has a problem with her jaw. She continues and says that she has to wear a mouthguard when she sleeps. Too much dick sucking, I guess. Or she seems to do a lot of videos where she attempts to see how much stuff she can fit in her pussy. Maybe she also does videos where she sees how much stuff she can fit in her mouth. What other orifices can this idea be extended to?
So that’s the video. Wow. That was some boring stuff. She did mention that it was mostly video game related candy as opposed to “traditional” candy, though.
At the beginning of the video, she said that she regularly gets candy from Japan and she showed huge containers of this stuff. Why? She’s lived in the US for many years. I’m thinking at least ten. Is the candy in Japan really that much better than the candy in the US?
I’ve eaten some Pocky in my time. It’s not great. And the portion sizes are miniscule. Japan seems to emphasise cute packaging over quality product. You get some chalky, bland candy in a Hello Kitty tin for five bucks or whatever. No thanks.
I’ve never even considered importing candy from the US but US candy is surely better than British candy. At least the non-chocolate stuff. There’s certainly more variety in the US. Way more. But who gives a shit? It’s candy. The shit they have in the grocery stores is good enough. Jelly Babies or whatever. Fine. I’ll go with it. Sure, I’d rather have those Life Savers gummies but who cares? I’m not going to go out of my fucking way to import this shit and pay the astronomical prices that people want for imported candy.
I did get a couple of tubs of Red Vines, over the years, though, from Amazon. They don’t sell licorice in the UK. Not really, anyway. It exists as a generic candy in bite size pieces or coils in any “pick and mix” place that might still exist but you can’t find a pack of Twizzlers or something like that.
It’s peculiar because licorice is popular in Northern Europe. I mean actual licorice, not so much that red “licorice”. But no, there’s no licorice culture in the UK.
Anyway, I’m going to go see how much licorice I can fit in my ass now.
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Checking out the Death Toll on Newt Wallen’s Twitter
Arleen Sorkin died, guys! I’ll give you a moment to pick yourself up off the floor. Yes, THE Arleen Sorkin.
WHO THE FUCK IS ARLEEN SORKIN?
I’ll look this up in a moment but I’m thinking that she had something to do with Uncle Joey from Full House. But she wasn’t on the show. No. I’m thinking that she was the co-host of Uncle Joey’s AWFUL America’s Funniest Home Videos rip off called America’s Funniest People.
Let me look this up.
I was right!
She was also on Days of Our Lives and as the person who Newt plagiarised mentioned, was the voice of Harley Quinn on some Batman cartoon. Oh, Batman: The Animated Series. Yeah, I used to watch that.
But to me, she’ll always be the co-host of that fucking dreadful America’s Funniest People. Even when I was watching it, as a kid, I knew that it was horrible. I hated the show. It was painfully unfunny. But I still watched it just to be “ironic”, I guess.
I remember that they would have segments where they go out on the streets, put a microphone in front of random people they meet, and basically say, “Okay, now do something funny.” You can imagine how that went. It was never anything even approaching comedy.
Let me look for some clips.
There’s a channel that has full episodes. And America’s Funniest Home Videos too. Actually, mostly America’s Funniest Home videos. The videos have been up for three years so no copyright strikes so far.
https://www.youtube.com/@BestAFVonU2BE/videos
0:30 – Wow, this is even worse than I remembered. They start the show with a GOD AWFUL skit that’s horribly acted and horribly written.
Then there’s a guy with his submission for the show. He’s playing “Four box tic tac toe.” Holy shit is not funny.
2:00 – Now we’re back to Arleen and her terrible comedy stylings. The skit is about selling jewelry and it’s not going well for her. So she says, “Maybe I should just go back to selling what really moves.”
Your ass? If she’s selling, I’m buying. I mean, not now, obviously. The woman is dead. And she was 67. But in 1990, I would. Although, I was like 12 at the time. Maybe she wouldn’t go for it.
Oh, there was actually another co-host of America’s Funniest People. It was Arleen Sorkin from 1990 to 1992 but then Tawny Kitaen from 1992 to 1994. And she also died recently. In 2021. I don’t remember her but no doubt Newt tweeted about her death at the time.
Anyway, I’m watching more of this show. It’s fucking awful. They show these HORRIBLE “jokes” that people in some mall are telling and then it cuts to the studio audience, who presumably just got done watching this shit, and they’re laughing hysterically. It’s impossible. There’s no way that they were watching these videos and having a reaction like that.
God. I can’t watch this any more.
But anyway, Newt Wallen. Newt Wallen is really broken up over the death of Arleen Sorkin. He said “No”.
Oh. That’s really interesting, Newt. Any memories of Arleen Sorking that you want to share?
No.
Have you ever so much as said the words “Arleen Sorkin” in your life before?
No.
Oh great. What an asshole. Death-obsessed piece of shit.
He retweeted about Bob Barker dying. Oh really. Bob Barker, you say. I thought that he died years ago. No. It was only recently. He was 99. So young. I can see why Newt was broken up about this. Couldn’t even be bothered to write “No” this time. Bob Barker didn’t even deserve a “No”. He only got a re-tweet.
He’s never written about Bob Barker in his life. Not once. But now that he’s dead, hey I have to tweet about this. People have to know that Bob Barker is dead. I must tell the world about this. It’s not enough that every print, television, and internet news outlet has covered the story. I, Newt Wallen, must also spread the word. To the 15 ladyboys who go on my Twitter.
And he re-tweets about William Friedkin. A spritely 87 years young. Newt wants us to know. Because he’s a death-obsessed asshole.
Never talked about him before. Not once. Show me the William Friedkin tweets.
And even when he died, can’t be bothered to say anything about him. What’s the point of any of this? It’s just Newt re-tweeted dead celebrities.
What criteria is even being used? Arleen Sorkin? Really? He’s a big Arleen Sorkin fan? How did she make the cut?
He’s a fucking moron.
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Problem Child 2 (1991) is a Hilarious Comedy Sequel! – Movie Dumpster
This is a Screenwave production. One of these guys, the obnoxious homo, writes the AVGN episodes now. He’s also the Reddit moderator on TheCinemassacre who banned me.
Same exact format as Hack the Movies. Same 90 minute “reviews” (summaries). Same title formats “(Movie) is (some stupid clickbait adjective)”. Same era of movies (1990s/2000s). Same genre (mostly horror).
Why would I watch this? If I don’t like Hack the Movies, which I don’t, why would I watch a Hack the Movies rip-off?
Actually, who’s ripping off who? Movie Dumpster has been around since 2018 and Hack the Movies since 2014. But Movie Dumpster has been doing this format of videos since the beginning, in 2018. Tony hasn’t been making these videos since 2018, has he? Now I have to check.
That seems to be the first Hack the Movies video, as we know it today. Newt is in it. They discuss the end of Rental Reviews. And that was in July 2020.
So…I don’t know when Rental Reviews started but I wouldnt’ say that Rental Reviews is overly similar to Hack the Movies or Movie Dumpster. At least in terms of the UNBEARABLY long run times.
So I’m thinking that Hack the Movies is the rip off. They ripped Movie Dumpster of all things. And obviously Rental Reviews. God, there’s not an original idea to be found from any of these people.
And to add to it all, Newt Wallen claims that he came up with the idea of Rental Reviews. If that’s true, which is very well may not be, Newt obviously stole the idea from somewhere else.
Why don’t these people rip off GOOD ideas? It’s completely baffling. I guess by ripping off shit ideas, they have the built in excuse of, “Of course my videos are shit. They’re supposed to be. That’s what I was going for.” Pretending that you enjoy making crap is a lot easier than making good videos.
So Problem Child. I fucking hated that kid. I wanted to rip his head off. And I never even saw the movie. The commercials were annoying enough.
I think that the actor who played this kid was on the IMDB forums back when those existed. I’m thinking like 15 or 20 years ago. And his username had the word “Roadie” in it. He would talk about his new job as a roadie for some band. There was a small group of people on IMDB who made it their life’s mission to make fun of this guy. Kind of like those losers from TheCinemassacreTruth on Reddit.
Wow. This video has A LOT more edits than Hack the Movies does. OCD levels of editing. Every two seconds, they’re splicing in some movie footage. I guess it saves us from having to look at these homos for too long.
3:00 – They say if you want more of this “content” you can go to Patreon. What? More of this? More of this shit where two homosexuals speak in rapid-fire succession while movie clips play every two seconds? No. I don’t want more of this. I want less of it. Where can I get less of it?
They havae 178 “patrons”. That’s just sad. They’ve been doing this since 2018. Trying to make money from this.
I’m five minutes in and I’ve already tuned out. They’re just talking a mile a minute. About what? I don’t know. Not the movie, I don’t think.
I can’t. I made it to ten minutes. I can’t listen to this shit any more. UNWATCHABLE, BOYS.
Let me look up that kid from the movie.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Michael_Oliver_(actor)
Michael Oliver. That’s right. Doesn’t mention what he’s doing now in terms of jobs or whatever. But he’s not acting. He was only in a handful of stuff and he “retired” when he was 16.
https://www.facebook.com/goodhopefm/photos/a.10150151656883887/10151539949848887/?type=3
There’s confirmation that he was working as a roadie at some point. That’s from 2013, though.
http://washedupcelebrities.blogspot.com/2006/10/michael-oliver.html
There’s his Washed Up Celebrities feature from 2006, which also confirms that he was a roadie. I remember Washed Up Celebrities. I used to go there regularly. Some blog *nostalgia*. Last post was in 2014.
http://michaeloliverfans.blogspot.com/
There’s a blog called “Gay Appreciation for Michael Oliver. That’s right. On the IMDB forums, it was a “joke” to call Michael Oliver gay. So one of these losers obviously made a blog with this same “joke”. This obvious harassment blog is still up seven years later and yet my blog got taken down for some unexplained reason.
https://filmboards.com/board/t/What-happened-to-him%3F-3403794/
Here are people posting the SAME FUCKING “JOKES” years later on some website that tried to be the successor to the IMDB forums. How long are they going to do this? It’s like 20 years of this shit now.
Anyway, that’s Movie Dumpster. Totally unwatchable. Aggressively awful. Avoid at all costs. And fuck that asshole Sean O’Rourke.
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How To Overcome Life Challenges – Zap Cristal
2:00 – “I know all of us have, at some point, gone through tough times.”
So she’s going to talk about video game music that helped her get through difficulties. Eugh. Fuck off.
Mr Wright Way II is talking about how some Final Fantasy game stopped him from the brink of suicide. Uh huh. Great.
By the way, Zap “Too Hot to be an Influencer” Cristal is wearing a Garfield t-shirt that says “Food Snob”. What year am I in? Is the Jim Davis corporation still cranking this shit out? Who’s buying it? Who’s buying Garfield t-shirts in 2023?
Oh my god. So Mr Wright Way II says that some guy who he describes as a “musician” died and by playing Final Fantasy VII, it helped him cope with the loss. Because in the game there’s a character who dies.
I don’t want to watch an hour of this shit. How about some time stamps? I have to just blindly skip ahead then.
9:00 – Mr Wright Way II was talking about some singer and Zap Cristal says, “It’s so funny because she’s our son’s favourite too.”
How fucking creepy is this? This guy, who Zap Cristal has known for less than a year, and got married to him, is referring to HER son as “OUR son”. Has this guy adopted Zap Cristal’s son already? It’s creepy as fuck. What is she doing with her life? What is she doing with her son’s life? Does she not give a shit? Just invite random black men to move in with you and your son?
Mary J. Blige is who they’re referring to. I had to look it up. Some black singer. And Zap Cristal says that “our” son has a crush on her.
Yeah. This is what the young folk are listening to. Fifty-two year old Mary J Blige. This is who all of the 12 year old Puerto Rican boys are swooning over.
It’s creepy as fuck. Just don’t even mention your son. Can we have that as a starting point? We don’t want to hear this creepy shit. Ideally, creepy shit shouldn’t even be happening but it seems like Zap Cristal is completely incapable of keeping her son away from creepy shit. So at least just don’t tell us about it. We don’t want to know.
I’m skipping ahead again.
13:00 – Zap Cristal says that during covid she was a teacher. What? So what is she doing now? And how did this cretin become a teacher in the first place? You need a degree, surely. Even in Texas. She has a degree? There’s no way. I mean, I know it’s not a big achievement to get a degree, even Erin has one, but there’s no way that this woman has one.
Skipping ahead.
17:15 – She’s talking about some stupid album about depression and comparing it to her own life. “I was getting out of a marriage where, let’s just face it, I was going through some things where my life was in jeopardy.”
I don’t think that she’s talking about Mr Wright Way. I think that she’s talking about something that happened in 2015. So this was yet another marriage. Probably to yet another black man who she barely knew.
Exactly how many black stepfathers does this unfortunate son of “theirs” have?
“My life and my kid’s life was in jeopardy.”
Fuck you, scumbag. You’re the one responsible for this. Nobody else. Stop marrying random black men. It’s okay to be alone.
It’s amazing how some women seem to always pick “abusive” men. What’s the common denominator here? You, you piece of shit. You’re picking these men. What is it about your that makes you choose abusive or “abusive” men?
She brought a guy into her home who she’s claiming was going to kill both her and her son. And this is just normal. We’re supposed to sympathise with her. “Oh, how awful for you. You’re such a victim.”
No. You did this. You invited the guy in. You married him. You let him live with you and your young son. It’s all you. The guy didn’t break in. This is who you wanted in your home. This murdeous piece of shit, according to you.
Skipping ahead.
26:30 – Zap says, “Listening to you, I’m reflecting on my own challenges and there’s so many I don’t even know where to start.” Then she talks about her “challenges” in growing her Youtube channel.
No, you dumb bitch. Concentrate on your life and your son’s life.
Skipping ahead.
44:30 – “People come and go and I wish them the best.”
She’s talking about all of her “abusive” black ex-husbands.
That’s enough for me. I skipped around until the end and nothing seemed interesting.
So that’s Zap Cristal and Mr Wright Way II talking about their “challenges”.
Everybody has problems but nobody wants to hear them. Nobody cares. I don’t just mean horntards on Youtube I mean nobody. People have their own problems and don’t give a fuck about yours. It’s just how it is, unfortunately. Your problems are yours to solve.
I have my own problems. But rather than whine about them, I’ll wait until I resolve them and then say what I decided to do. The solution will not involve marrying black men, I can assure you of that.
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A Boy and His Blob – Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN) – Cinemassacre
This has got to the worst AVGN thumbnail of them all. I know that he’s not an attractive guy but come on. This was intentional. They chose the worst possible picture.
It’s like in the Guardian or whatever newspaper that really hates Trump, they’ll always use the worst possible photo of the guy. Like when he’s in mid-sneeze or something. We’re not fucking retarded. We see what you’re doing here. This is childish bullshit. Just present the facts. Like journalists.
0:15 – But first a word from some VPN. He’s going to tell us all about how you can bypass region locks now. We get it, Jimmy. It’s also against the terms and conditions of the services.
I wonder if Jimmy could be held liable if Netflix or whatever terminated your account due to bypassing their region locks? I know that they won’t but I guess that they could. And James Rolfe is here telling you to do it. A good brain-teaser for a first year law student, perhaps.
2:30 – Extended discussion of David Crane, Kaboom, and Pitfall. Mike wrote this shit. It’s obvious.
2:45 – Nice hair, Jimmy. At least he’s foregoing the…whatever the fuck he was doing before. Hair in a can or CGI hair or something.
Maybe he should just draw some hair on. Get a marker and fill it all in. I think that people do that. Not with markers but as a tattoo. I think the idea is that you have to keep your hair basically shaved but at least it looks like you have a full head of stubble.
Also, Mike has fucking played this game before. Not too long ago. And watching this video, I’m being reminded of Mike’s complaints about the game. This is fucking ridiculous. Well, maybe Mike will at least get “help” credit for this one.
17:30 – Shout out to jelly beans being Ronald Reagan’s favourite candy.
I remember this. I remember a third grade teacher talking about this. But it’s a myth. It’s just some Jewish media bullshit.
This is what it’s based on. There was some media event. Just some stupid, staged, hokey bullshit. And one of Reagan’s staff offered some jelly beans to Reagan. The jelly beans were in a jar. They must have been the chosen snack for the event. No big deal.
So Reagan takes some jelly beans and starts eating them. Okay. So?
So then the Jewish media ran with this story and talked about how jelly beans are Ronald Reagan’s favourite candy. Just because they happened to be there at this press event. No. They were just there. I doubt that Reagan requested jelly beans be served.
Why was the Jewish media so invested in this totally ficticious story? I don’t know. Maybe prominent Jews were large shareholders in Jelly Belly.
17:45 – “As a kid, I didn’t know the difference between Ronald Reagan and Ronald McDonald.”
Well, that might be because you’re retarded. Or he’s just too young. Let me think. He was president from 1980 to 1988. So Jimmy would have been six in 1988? Okay, I can understand not remembering him then.
But I remember Ronald Reagan. I remember being puzzled by the term “presidential race”, though. How the fuck did this old man win a race? I pictured it as some kind of epic foot race up a mountain path like in a cartoon or something. Really? This 80 year old man is America’s fastest runner? Well, whatever.
Then, for reasons that aren’t explained, James just gets “angry” for some reason. Oh. That’s…funny stuff.
Credits. Directed and written by James Rolfe. Uh huh. Sure it was.
Edited by Sean O’Rourke. Fuck that guy.
Gameplay by James, Sean, and Mike. Uh huh. I’d like to see the percentage breakdowns here. I’ll say 0% Jimmy, 10% Sean, 90% Mike.
As for the video it was…boring. Boring but not awful. That seems to be what the Sean O’Rourke era of Cinemassacre is all about. The Kieran era was awful. The Sean O’Rourke era is boring. I’m not sure which is worse. For my purposes, awful videos make for better reviews than boring videos.
Let’s see what the homos on Reddit had to say.
Oh, first I have to scroll through ten repetitive “jokes” about “A Boy and his Slob” and it’s pictures of James Rolfe with Justin Silverman. Great. Each one is funnier than the last.
Top comment is “A boy and his slob”. Very original. Good stuff, boys.
- “one of the most boring AVGN episodes yet”
Finally we get to something that isn’t a “meme” or about how James is bald.
- “It’s completely and utterly forgettable. The jokes are unfunny, his line delivery is terrible but it’s not bad enough to actually be memorable. It’s nothing content. No one will remember this episode in a month from now.”
Yeah.
- “
- “My gosh, dude, shave the head or get a wig. Wear the old glasses. A reason why people liked the recent Indiana Jones video was because of 1) bald head was blocked and 2) old glasses be better. I’m not shaming anybody who goes bald. I’ve dealt with it before and started taking propecia, which has helped. But he’s a public figure and it would be so easy to just recapture that nerd look or if anything, do something in your videos that alludes to hair loss.”
Propecia, you say. Let me look this up.
Propecia is a brand name for a drug called Finasteride. You want to know the side-effects?
“Finasteride can cause several sexual side effects, including erectile dysfunction, low sex drive, and difficulty ejaculating. In terms of erectile dysfunction, this is often a temporary, short-term issue that ceases once you stop taking the drug.”
I…oh. So this guy is going on the internet and BOASTING about his impotence.
“Golly gee wilikers, guys. I don’t want to bald-shame anyone but I’ve got a full head of a hair and a limp dick thanks to the fine folk who make Propecia.”
Umm…well…you do you, I guess. But I think that I’d rather be bald.
But it’s only short-term, at least in terms of the erectile dysfunction. So I guess the low sex-drive and difficulty ejaculating is for life. But anyway, once you stop taking the drug, the erectile dysfunction goes away.
Great! So how long do I have to take the drug?
What? Until the day I die? And if I stop, my hair all goes away? Oh, man. This sounds terrible. Now I’ll be bald and have a low sex-drive and difficulty ejaculating.
This is why you need to think about these things before making the decision.
And any hair growth is dubious anyway. The most I ever saw in these claims is that it helps you keep the hair that you have. Really. How do we fucking know that? Total scam. A drug that you have to take from the age of 20 until you die.
Also, I believe that it’s a cream. So you rub this cream on your hands and then you rub it into your scalp. If this stuff actually worked, wouldn’t you be concerned about getting hairy palms?
Oh, Wikipedia talks about what happens when you stop taking the drug.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Finasteride
Individuals claiming to experience PFS report sexual, neurological, hormonal and psychological side effects that persist for an extended period after stopping the drug. Reported symptoms include penile atrophy and tissue changes, decreased ejaculate volume and quality, reduced libido, erectile dysfunction, loss of penile sensitivity, decreased orgasm sensation, dry skin, metabolic changes, muscle and strength loss, gynecomastia, depression, anxiety, panic attacks, insomnia, anhedonia, concentration problems, memory impairment and suicidal ideation
Wait…so my penis will shrink and I’ll grow breasts? And I’ll become suicidal? Well, that seems obvious given the cirucmstances.
And read this guy’s fucking messages. He seems to be pretty effeminate already.
“There’s no shame in getting a hair transplant or a very nice wig. If it makes you feel better it makes you feel better.”
Just put your wig on and jack your limp, atrophied dick off with your bony girl arms, you homo. But personally, I’ll stick to being bald, thanks.
- “did Matei stream this recently?”
He did. Coincidence? No.
What’s adhenia? That was one of the side-effects.
Oh. Reduced ability to experience pleasure. Yeah, that’s a good one too.
Hey, retards, if this stuff worked, nobody would be bald.
I’m doing some more research. Apparently, this stuff blocks DHT, which is some kind of male hormone. And transgenders (guys in dresses) take this drug because they want to be more feminine. Smaller penis, bigger tits, you know how it goes.
Maybe James should take it. I don’t know. It might make the videos more interesting anyway. He’d be there with a full head of hair and a couple of fabulous breasts. “Hey, my dick isn’t working any more but that’s okay. I already have two kids. Now let’s talk about my favourite character from the Mario universe: Birdo.”
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Rex Viper’s YouTube channel! – Cinemassacre
0:00 – “Look what I did. I started a Youtube channel. Yeah.”
Sure you did, Jimmy. Was it Mike or one of the Screenwave flunkies who started the channel? Because we know it wasn’t James “Seven and a Half Years of Special Education” Rolfe. Creating some kind of online account is too challenging for him.
“It’s been a long time since I’ve started a Youtube channel.”
It’s all agreed and accepted that Mike Matei started the Cinemassacre channel. So what channel is Jimmy talking about that he started? Constant fucking lies from this retard.
0:15 – From now on, this is where I’ll be posting all of the band’s content.”
Again with this shit? YOU will be posting the content here? Why can’t he just be honest. You can be honest and still vague about who’s doing the actual work. “From now on, all of the band’s content will be posted here.” What was so hard about that? It leaves it ambiguous as to who will be uploading the videos. But for whatever bizarre reason, Jimmy wants you to think that he’s the one uploading the videos. He’s the one who started the channel. It’s all James fucking Rolfe.
“Sure, I could post it on that other channel of mine.”
You mean the one that’s 50% owned by Mike Matei and 50% owned by Screenwave? Is that “your” channel that you’re talking about? God, the fucking nerve of this fucking lying sack of shit.
That’s some hair, by the way, Jimmy. Holy shit. Just shave it.
0:30 – “Rex Viper is working on an album. Covers and medleys of retro video games and movie songs.”
Absolutely nobody wants this. NOBODY. I don’t even understand the fucking band. Nobody does.
The songs aren’t parodies. They’re just…I don’t even know. They’ll take a word from a video game and combine it with a word from a movie and make a shit song out of this. None of it makes sense.
0:45 – “Workout music for nerds.”
No. Nobody is working out to this. Not a single fucking person on earth. But it’s nice to know what he thinks of his audience. They’re nerds.
Maybe some of them are. Almost certainly some of them are. Maybe a lot of them are. But I think that most people who watch the videos are fairly normal people. They’re just on Youtube. They subscribed to this guy ten years ago. They check out the videos once in a while. They say, “Well, that sucked” and then they go about their day. No big deal.
“Honestly, it’s something that I would listen to.”
Well, we’ve found one person who likes Rex Viper. James Rolfe. He really enjoys his own product.
How about joining us in reality, Jimmy? Rex Viper is the worst fucking thing in the world. It even edged out cancer. And yet Jimmy is listening to this trash and saying, “Hey, I’m really digging this. Those Rex Viper lads have it all figured out.”
No, Jimmy. It’s awful and you need to realise this. Not everything you do is great. Indeed, AVGN was a total fluke. It was successful despite of your involvement. You’re not some creative genius. You’re a straight up, no fooling, retard.
1:15 – “If you want to support the band, you can buy our new shirt.”
Awful design. And it says “retro nerd rock”. Yeah. That’s what I’m going to wear, Jimmy.
And the shirt is $35. THIRTY-FIVE DOLLARS. I was thinking $15. $20 tops.
Anyway, he (or, more accurately, some intern from Screenwave) will be putting all of the Rex Viper shit on this new Rex Viper channel. This must be some algorithm thing. Because Rex Viper is presumbaly poison for the Cinemassacre channel.
Then you read the comments. About 90% of them are from those faggots on Reddit repeating the same three “memes”. These are the only people who want this shit. Gay men who have absolutely nothing going on in their lives.
Rex Viper is awful, no question, but am I going to make cute little Photoshops of Dino as a woman? No. Why would I? I like women. But this terrible “band” is a convenient excuse for those fags to do their faggotry.
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Destiny Fomo’s Horrible Shorts Plus the Edinburgh Fringe Festival
It’s Madam Whoremo in a skirt and bikini bouncing around. Oh. Yeah, those are breasts alright. What else do you have, Whoremo? Have you considered trying to put out an interesting video?
Here’s Whoremo in a different bikini. She’s dancing to Shawn Michaels’ theme music. Well, “dancing” is too strong a term. It looks like her pimp TuanX is forcing her to dance at gunpoint. What the fuck is going on with this one?
Here’s an abysmal video where Destiny Fomo advertises her streams channel. It has like 1,700 subscribers and no videos. How does TuanX plan on making this a success? Oh, and she shakes her tits.
Here’s Whoremo as Chun-Li and she’s miming some “intercourse” song from Family Guy. According to the reviews on that escort review site, you most definitely DO NOT want to have intercourse with Madam Whoremo. People said that she behaved like she hated it and was being forced to do it. They also described her vagina as being unusually odorous. That’s me being kind.
So those are the videos. Umm…well, you’re not going to set the Youtube world on fire with this shit. We’ve seen all of this already. Has it worked so far? We get it, Whoremo. You have breasts. Who cares? I’m not in the 7th grade. TuanX had one fucking idea: show Madam Whoremo’s tits. And then when that didn’t work, he panicked. “SHOW THEM AGAIN!”
No. TuanX. Listen. It’s a bad idea. We need something fresh and creative. Not tits.
So I was at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival this past weekend. It’s basically a homosexual convention. But I’m secure in my masculinity so I go. With my female girlfriend.
It’s a place where anybody can put on some kind of show. It’s mostly plays, dances, singing, stand up comedians, shit like this. And EASILY 90% of the stuff is gay. Openly gay.
For example, I went to see a play about Leopold and Loeb a few years ago at this thing. They were two murderers, if you were unaware. So you might think that the play is about the murder. You’d be dead wrong. It was about their homosexual relationship.
“Wait a minute. There’s no evidence that Leopold and Loeb were gay.”
Doesn’t matter. This is what the play was about. Everything has to be gay at this thing.
In years past, we would just go and see whatever and it would result in seeing some shocking bad shit. I spent 90 minutes in a hot, sweaty attic, while some posh English woman talked about her vagina. I PAID for this.
You might think, “Wait a minute. That might be kind of hot.”
Let me assure you that it was not hot. It was boring. We get it, madam. You have a pussy. Do you have anything else? An interesting story to tell, perhaps? No. Let’s just talk about your pussy for the next 80 minutes.
There was another one where it was two young American women putting on a play with like 15 people in the audience in a little room that seated 15 people. “Oh, this is going to be hot.”
No. It was awkward as fuck. And the play went NOWHERE. NOWHERE! They just talked about friendship or something. I don’t know. And then the play just abruptly ended. Nothing happened the whole fucking time. But you’re sitting there in this tiny room, like two feet from these women, and you have to smile and pretend that this is good.
So this year I said, let’s do this right. I’m only going to go to shows that got good reviews from legitimate sources.
So we saw some puppet show. Not in a childish way. It was for adults. But it wasn’t good. The puppetry was good. There were good visuals. The acting was good. But the story was awful. It was just random stuff that kept happening. There was no connection from one event to the next. And then it just ended.
Then we saw a one woman show where a 40 year old posh English woman pretended to be Medusa. And she talked about the character and whatnot. Heavy doses of feminism. Heavy doses of lesbiansim. And that was it.
Who’s the audience for this? Are militant lesbians interested in Greek mythology? I don’t get it.
Then we saw a “dance” show. Some gymnnast/acrobat shit. These women with no tits took their clothes off. They had some kind of skin-toned body suit on. And the guys had some simulated nudity as well. They also kissed each other. Of course. Because everything has to be gay.
And then whatever, they twirled on ropes and spun hula hoops around themselves and stood on each other’s heads and shit like this. The usual shit for…whatever this is. But I’ve seen this sort of thing before at this event so it’s obviously something.
Then we saw the world’s worst comedian. I remember distinctly searching for comedians with my girlfriend the day before. I said let’s find somebody good. We found a black guy. I said, “Our search is over. This is the guy.”
So we go to the show. Within 30 seconds, it was revealed that this guy was obsese, black, and gay. That was the entire act. The entire act was about how he’s a fat, black, gay guy. An hour of this shit.
He’s literally bending over and begging people to fuck him in the ass. THAT’S THE JOKE! Get it? Because he’s a sodomite!
Look, we get it. We get that you’re fat and you’re black and you’re gay and these have shaped your views and your experiences and whatever. But TELL US about some of these views and experiences. In a humourous way. You know, like a comedian. Don’t just say, “Hey, I’m a big fat, black guy, fuck me in the ass.” That’s not a joke. That’s nothing.
Then the next day we saw some more fucking trash.
But it was inspiring. These people have spent a lot of time and a lot of money putting these shows together. They felt strongly that these stories, which go NOWHERE, had to be told. Poorly written. Poorly conceptualised. Poorly structured. These are stories that these people wanted to tell.
They hired actors. They reheared. There were re-writes. They printed promotional leaflets. They rented the venue. They actively advertised the show. And the show is complete shit. They had to have known this. They had to have known that they were telling a story that goes nowhere and nobody wants to hear but they did it anyway. It’s magical. This is the human experience.
When Erin makes a terrible video that nobody can possibly be enjoying that’s not an anomaly. This is the norm. This is what Youtube is all about. This is what entertainment is all about.
Think about it. How many horrendous sitcoms are there? Like 95% of them. At least. I’ve seen every episode of Growing Pains. Never laughed once. It was on for years. Hugely popular.
I’m not singling out the Seavers. Diff’rent Strokes, Webster, Mr Belvedere, Small Wonder, Who’s the Boss. You name a sitcom and chances are that it’s complete and utter trash.
Same with movies. Same with plays. Same with everything.
But it’s inspiring. Because if THIS shit can get produced, what would happen if somebody actually made something halfway decent? Something with an ounce of creativity? I’m not saying that it has to be good. It just has to have a little something that isn’t horrible. And sometimes it happens. And it takes off. It becomes a hit.
So I’m going to start working on my show for next year’s festival. I want it to be something different. All of these shows are trying to cater to the homosexual community. Why? Expand your audience. I’m going to write a play that heterosexual men can enjoy. Not in the “Hey, there’s going to be tits and gore” crude variety. My target audience is intelligent heterosexual men. Why not? The theatre industry has been actively excluding this huge demographic probably since the dawn of theatre.
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Life Update: New Job, New Fridge, & SoCal Gaming Expo News – Super Retro Gal
The triumphant return of…this nutjob.
So the video starts with a cat massasging her tits. What the fuck is this? Why is this in the video? Is she not embarassed by this?
What she does with her cat in the privacy of her own home is her own business. I guess. I mean, there are obviously moral issues. But in any event, don’t put it on fucking Youtube.
This is almost as bad as the time when she showed her husband’s decrepit, senile grandfather taking a bath. Shortly before she killed the man. She has absolutely no fucking sense. Elder abuse and bestiality are not things that should be on Youtube. Should I really have to say that?
0:30 – “I put on some makeup because I was feeling a little down about myself so sometimes I do that.”
Eugh. Great. You guys like women talking about their depression, right?
It’s not limited to women, of course. You don’t want to hear anyone talking about their depression. But women are more prone to doing this, of course.
0:45 – She’s talking about how she hasn’t “vlogged” since some Disneyland video. “So many things have happened since then that are…emotional.”
Who fucking cares? Just get on with it.
“Heartbreaking.”
She didn’t care this much when she killed her husband’s grandfather.
“And absolutely motivational for me to just continue on with continuing to try to be the best person that I can be every single day.”
Put that jumbled mess on a fucking motivational poster.
1:15 – “If any of you follow me on social media, you’ll know that I sold the fridge that I absolutely loved and adored.”
It was a refrigerator from the 1960s and she has it repaired by some guy who repairs vintage appliances. She made a video about it. And then…she sold it? Let’s hear an explanation. My guess is that it kept breaking and it was a pain in the ass.
1:30 – “We don’t know what our future holds, especially here in California.”
What? First of all, no explanation given for the refrigerator. But secondly, she fucking killed “Pops” to get this fancy house. Now they’re just going to move?
1:45 – “We sold our fridge because we are anticipating somewhere moving.”
Well…yeah. But where are you keeping your food now? In a cold, wet sack?
They have no concrete plans of moving but they sold their refrigerator. What’s next? The stove?
2:15 – Another reason for selling it is because it used a lot of electricity and she’s moving into “energy-focused hippyism.”
She is the absolute worst type of person on earth.
She’s broke. She said that she can’t afford to pay her bills. So what does she do? She gets a vintage refrigerator, pays some hipster douchebag god knows how much money to get it running again, she claims that all of the internal workings were replaced, and then she fucking sells it. Because now they’re “energy-focused hippies.”
How about being job-focused hippies? Have you considered that?
Like that fucking refrigerator was destroying the planet. I hate all of that shit where the blame gets shifted to the individual. Oh, you can’t travel because of the “carbon footprint”. Oh, you have to recycle. Oh, be sure to compost.
No. How about you fuck off? How about you go after the people who are actually responsible for pollution: giant corporations.
2:30 – Then she says that she got a new refrigerator and a new microwave. What? What happened to your “energy-focused hippyism”? What happened to you moving soon? THIS MAKES NO FUCKING SENSE.
They’re moving soon. Apparently. And they’re concerned about the environment. They’re also broke. So let’s buy a whole slew of new heavy appliances.
Fucking retard.
Then she shows the refrigerator. It’s fucking gigantic. It takes up half of their kitchen. Do you need a refrigerator this size for two people? What happened to the environment, you dumb bitch?
Their microwave was also enormous.
Get small, energy-efficient appliances, you complete and total buffoon. You’re killing the environment with your giant appliances.
And why get rid of her old one then? It makes no fucking sense. She had a perfectly good refrigerator. Use what you have. Don’t add to the landfill problem. Stop consuming.
It’s seriously the biggest refrigerator I’ve ever seen. It’s like a walk in closet.
3:15 – She says that they got rid of the old refrigerator because it didn’t keep food cold. Okay. So why is this now the third or fourth reason given for why you got rid of it? Why didn’t you just start with this one? This was your most convincing argument for why you should get rid of it. The other excuses were complete bullshit that made no sense. But okay, it didn’t keep food cold. Fine. That’s a legitimate reason to get rid of it.
God, is this fucking imbecile annoying.
4:15 – Then she says that she has a “deep freeze” outside. This is another freezer, I guess. She says that it’s because they have a “meat service”. I assume that this is a thing where meat gets delivered to your door.
Umm…dumb bitch….are you still thinking about the environment? Home delivery of meat? And to the point where you can’t even eat it all, it has to be frozen in a separate freezer dedicated just for that purpose?
Plus, let’s not forget about the harm that the meat farming industry does to the environment. Methane gas and whatnot.
4:30 – They also got a new washer and dryer. I can not fucking believe this. Which part of being an “eco-focused hippie” does ANY of this relate to? Mindless consumerism contributes negatively to the environment. She’s getting all new appliances. Needlessly. Also, aren’t they moving soon? Why are they doing this? Plus, they’re broke. Can’t pay the bills.
7:00 – “So you may be wondering, am I still working for a major California theme park?”
To be honest, I wasn’t.
And she says that she is. So what a fucking disappointment this. She’s a food and beverage manager. Let the good times roll.
“I absolutely love it. I am from food and beverage, actually.”
Is this really happening? Is she actually promoting “food and beverage” as some kind of dream job?
I’m not disparaging the “food and beverage” industry. Like most people, I’ve worked in food and beverage. It’s a common job that one does in one’s youth.
But is this what you want to do as a middle aged woman? I mean, it’s an honest job. I’m not taking anything away from it. People do it. But are they skipping to work every day and saying, “Oh, I love my job so much”? Only if they’re mentally ill are they doing that.
“I come from food and beverage”. Fuck off.
Then she says that her first job was at a restaurant called Ruby’s in “Warshington” (sic) state. She had to lie on her resume and say that she’s a cheerleader because they only hired cheerleaders. Uh huh. But actually she was emo. I see. Well, this is…this is all kinds of awful.
But that’s how she “comes from food and beverage.”
It would be like me delivering pizzas again. Yeah, I would do it. It’s better than doing nothing. But I wouldn’t say, “Wow, it’s great to be back to delivering pizzas again. This is where I want to be as a middle aged man.”
Then she goes over her career trajectory, which was mostly restaurants. She says, “Food and beverage is where I need to be and want to be.”
It is so fucking delusional. It has to be. She’s like 40 years old.
Take Newt Wallen, for example. He’s working in the movie theatre. But he openly says that he doesn’t want to do it. He does it because it’s a job and it pays but he doesn’t want to do it. I get it. That’s the normal response.
He doesn’t make out like it’s his dream job.
But this woman is talking about “food and beverage” like it’s something that she was put on this earth to do. Food and fucking beverage.
And she was talking about a manager that she had in some restaurant who taught her that you could be a manager AND be a little silly. So she takes that philosophy to her new role as a food and beverage manager.
This is…this is so bad. How can they afford all of this shit on a food and beverage salary? I don’t think that the husband is an investment banker. Well, this is why they can’t pay their bills, I guess.
8:45 – “Probably the number one question I get right now is why did you sell So Cal.”
This is the nerd convention that she became part-owner of. And then sold it within a year.
She didn’t have time. That’s the answer.
9:45 – “I will tell you that that expo is my heart and my soul. It is my passion.”
AND SHE STARTS CRYING!!!
Let me recap:
- She buys a nerd convetion.
- She says that she has NO TIME to run it.
- She sells it within a year.
It’s her “soul and passion”. She’s just so passionate about it that she can’t spend any time on it. So she says, “Fuck this. Let some other sucker buy this nerd convention.”
“Sometimes you have to learn to let stuff go.”
She didn’t cry after she killed “Pops.” But she’s here getting emotional over a NERD CONVENTION that she didn’t give two shits about, didn’t spend any time on, and sold within a year.
This is fucking psychotic behavior. She just all of a sudden starts crying. OVER NOTHING. A real contrast to that video where she dispassionately talked about “Pops” dying (from her killing him).
Then she complains that her business partners weren’t as passionate about the nerd convention as she was. But…SHE DIDN’T DO ANYTHING! So…they did less than nothing? Fuck off.
Then she ends it in her usual awkward fashion where the camera lingers for like three seconds longer on her weird expression than it should.
- “My reality hit was not that I was happy you sold to focus on you being your best you, but came to the realization that, if you’re not involved with the expo, I may never run into you in person again. I hope that’s not the case.”
Well, well, well. John Riggs back in the house. Perving on the ladies as per usual. And what a fucking mess that is. Does it even make sense? I think that he was typing that with one hand.