Gamer Girls

What screams 2010s more than the 1990s hit South Park?

YOU FUCKING LAZY PIECE OF SHIT! I haven’t even owned a tv in the past 12 years but if I was going to pick a show from the 2010s, it wouldn’t be this. This fucking retard just picks the easiest fucking shit he can think of. CARTOONS. Fucking half of these episodes were CARTOONS. Cartoons from when he was a child.

It is so fucking stupid. How did Screenwave possibly greenlight this? Why didn’t they say, “Hey, James, we know how much you hate working but how about doing a live-action show that actually peaked in the decade that you’re talking about? Just try it out. We’ll help.”

0:15 – In a weepy voice he says, “This is the last installment for now. Yeah…I know. Maybe another time I’ll come back and do more Halloween tv shows because this was really fun.”

He’s saying this like we’re fucking disappointed that this is the last of his zero effort videos. No. James. Stop this. I don’t want to watch this shit. Who does? Who’s the audience for these episode recaps?

It’s not me you should be concerned about. It’s you. You’re not doing me a favour by making these shitty videos. It’s your JOB. This is how you make money. If you continue on insisting on putting out absolute shit tier videos like this, the job is going to end. Don’t you care about that? Isn’t the very real prospect of living on the street motivation for you to put some fucking effort into your videos?

2010s. South Park. That show that I watched in college in the 1990s. Fuck you.

0:45 – He’s going through his honourable mentions. Always Sunny in Philadelphia. Then he rattles off a series of children’s shows. And I mean…fucking unbelievable…he’s talking about shows for FIVE YEAR OLDS. These are shows that he watched with his children, presumably.

He mentioned one show for adults and then a series of TODDLER shows. Really? Why does he refuse to put any effort into this? Just fucking Google it. 2010s Halloween tv shows.

1:30 – He’s complaining about Tegridy Farms episodes. Isn’t this what they’ve been doing for quite some time? There’s a theme for each season? He’s says that he’s watched the show from the beginning. Wouldn’t he know this?

2:15 – He chose the episode because it’s about Blockbuster videos and the Shining. James…if you haven’t done anything since 1997, that’s fine. But then just don’t do videos where you promise to talk about the 2000s and 2010s. Because this is fucking stupid.

4:15 – “As somebody who hangs on to physical media…”

And he’s pointing to a video casette collection. But…it doesn’t exist. He’s pointing to a greenscreen. This is all greenscreened. This is completely insane.

5:30 – “In the 2006 episode Hell on Earth, in which Satan throws a big party, was a spoof of an MTV reality series My Super Sweet 16, which I never heard of, nor would ever care to watch…”

James REALLY wants you to know that he’s never even heard of My Super Sweet 16. We get it, James. You’re not watching shows about teenage girls. Who are you trying to convince? Nobody was accusing you of anything.

“No. Come on, guys. Enough messing around. I seriously don’t even know about the existence of teenage girls. It’s not something that interests me. Alright? I have a wife and family.”

James, what the hell are you doing? We were just talking about South Park here.

He also seemed REALLY offended by the weed farm storyline in South Park. James…we get it. You don’t smoke marijuana. It’s fine. You don’t have to freak out about it. Nobody cares.

6:30 – He’s saying that he’s seen people use an iPad on a skateboard (what?) “Often during covid in 2020 but let’s not dwell on that nightmare.”

James is also absolutely petrified of covid.

I’ll tell you what James was doing during covid. Smoking weed with teenage girls. You sick fuck. That’s why he’s expressing such outrage about these things. He’s trying to throw people off the track. I’m on to you, Mr Retard Man.

Then he just continues summarising the episode. Fuck this lazy shit.

Unbelieveably bad. This whole Monster Madness has been awful. All he does is summarise the episode and after the 1990s, he stopped watching tv so for 2000 and 2010 he just chose more 1990s shows. And they were fucking cartoons.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_Halloween_television_specials

All James had to do was to go to that page and find something suitable. The work is already done for him. Let’s find some good 2000s and 2010s Halloween tv episodes that I think would appeal to James.

• Degrassi: The Next Generation
• Gossip Girl
• Pretty Little Liars
• Scream Queens
• The Carrie Diaries
• Gilmore Girls
• Glee
• Teen Mom
• 8 Simple Rules for Dating my Teenage Daughter
• Sabrina the Teenage Witch

That’s a start. That should keep James busy for next year’s Monster Madness.

Mrs Nerd: James, are you still watching Gilmore Girls? Your family misses you.

James: Honey, please. I’m doing very important research for Monster Madness. This is my job. And leave those tissues there.

How many times can he do a video on the same game? I’ve never found his obsession with this game funny or interesting. I’ve seen Mike beat the game, on stream, for money, and it was…whatever. It’s not a particularly good game but it’s not interesting.

0:00 – But first a word from our sponsor. This VPN splashed out for probably their 100th ad on the channel. Aren’t there diminishing returns? Anybody who’s interested in VPNs and watches the channel already knows about the service.

1:30 – It starts with some greenscreen shit of James as an old archaelogist uncovering a Jekyll and Hyde game. I fucking hate the greenscreen. Fuck the greenscreen. And these skits are never funny in any event.

2:45 – Then he’s back in the present. Probably still greenscreen, I don’t know. Everything is greenscreen with this guy. And he starts making scat “jokes”.

6:15 – The game vomits on James for some reason.

10:15 – He gets the Japanese version of the game.

By the way, he was mostly explaining how the game operates. It was fine.

13:45 – More scat “jokes”.

14:30 – One of the homos from Movie Dumpster makes a cameo. Not the faggot who’s a moderator on Reddit, though.

16:00 – Now there’s some…Back to the Future reference…and the old archaelogist James Rolfe meets present day James Rolfe but…then the archaelogist becomes a priest and it becomes an Exorcist “parody.” What the fuck is going on? Loads of green screen, of course.

16:45 – More totally uncalled for and unfunny scat “jokes”.

Then the video ends with yet more delightful green screen and a dummy being thrown down a staircase.

Gameplay by James, Sean, and Mike. Uh huh. Can we get the percentages?

The boys on Reddit really praised this episode. “Oh, look at the camera angles.”

We’re not making Mutiny on the Bounty. I don’t care about the camera angles or how many hours of green screen went into this or the fabulous “special” effects. Just make an engaging video.

This was not engaging. I didn’t find it remotely funny. It was somewhat interesting at times when he was describing the gameplay but those times were few and far between. He had to make way for these delicious skits.

And the story made no fucking sense. Elderly James Rolfe is an Indiana Jones parody, then he takes the Back to the Future car back to the present day, then he’s suddenly the priest from the Exorcist? Believe me, I didn’t leave anything out. Nothing is explained. That’s the sequence of events.

It’s always time-travel with this guy. Time-travel and poop. These are his autistic obsessions.

James is always convinced that the number of hours he puts into a video equates to how good the video is. No. We don’t want greenscreen videos that took 500 hours to edit. Forget all of that. Spend that 500 hours making a good script. Then record footage of you or Mike or whoever plays these games, playing the game and you read the script. There you go. There’s your video. No poop. No green screen. No bad CGI explosions. No convuluted nonsense about a robot who turns into a Martian who goes back in time to save the underground vampires from The Adventures of Lolo. Just come up with a decent script, you fucking retard.

Oh, some dope posted about it on my CinemassacreTruth subreddit and then deleted it when he realised his mistake.

be honest, the new video is good
by inCinemassacreTruth

Who are these people? I’ve never seen these names before. I assume that anyone posting there is lost and was looking for THECinemassacreTruth.

These people must be going to my sub-reddit and being really confused. “I heard about Cinemassacre Truth and how funny it is but…this is just one guy posting stuff and calling everyone gay. I must be missing something. I’ll give it a chance.”

That psycho GarbageStabber was spamming up my page recently. He must have been horny. He sometimes does this sort of thing and then expresses regret, after he cums.

So I reported him to the moderators at TheCinemassacreTruth for a clear violation of their, “No user feuds/drama” rule:

https://www.reddit.com/user/skittlesdoritos/comments/17g0rfo/mm_itb_24_tremors_1990/

Do you not consider this to be psychotic behaviour from your favourite user GarbageStabber? If you don’t, I’m happy to forward you some of the thousands of death and rape threats that he’s sent me.

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I expect you to ban a lunatic who only posts on your subreddit. You’ve repeatedly threatened to ban people who harass Newt or Kieran, for example, which takes place outside of your sub-reddit. Why be so selective in what you choose to enforce? The guy is a complete lunatic as you must be aware. And dangerous.

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I’m not sure what ‘threats to ban’ you’re even referring to. We have announced rules about content posted on the sub, though I don’t think we ever threatened or banned anyone over those. But again, that’s rules about stuff in our sub.

Look, I could accuse you of the same stuff. You talk shit about like every other post anyone posts on our sub, how is that not obsessive and harassing? You’ve been reposting our stuff for what, 3-4 years now? You want to keep interacting with content that people post on our sub, so how is it not hypocritical to then expect us to ban people who go and interact with you?

And again, what would it change anyway? Block them and you’re good.

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He has a thousand alts. I’ve reported all of his shit. My subreddit hasn’t even been up for two years. I cross-post posts of public interest.

GarbageStabber is known to be an obsessive lunatic who sends death and rape threats. He was undoubtedly the person who talked about Kieran’s father. He was undoubtedly the person who sent threats to Newt. He’s sent thousands to me. How on earth do you justify not banning this guy who is clearly disturbed?

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I’ve not seen any proof of any of what you claim, I don’t follow random people around the internet to see what they post. He was punished for his behaviour on the sub a couple times when we deemed it necessary.

And you’re no better than him anyway. You’re evading a full redit-wide ban, and you’ve made a subreddit after Reddit banned your previous one and blocked you from creating another. And you’re actively ‘evading’ a ban from our subreddit by dedicating yours to interacting with posts in ours. Sure, it’s not technically ban evasion, but in practice you’re just using a loophole because you clearly can’t get enough of our community.

And no, don’t give me those excuses, you’re talking shit about every single thing you crosspost. It’s your choice to interact with people and make personal attacks at them. I’m not sure what your goal is, but if you’re looking for attention, don’t come expecting us to take action when you finally get it.

All that said, I would genuinely love to know why you think that crossposting random things people post and writing detailed reviews of shitty youtube videos (that almost no one will ever see) is a worthwhile use of your limited time on this earth.

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“We won’t ban a clearly dangerous lunatic because you call us gay.” Interestingly, they also say that harassing Kieran and Newt in real life is not a bannable offence.

If you don’t want to be called gay, stop allowing clearly homoerotic content to be published on your catty homosexual subreddit.

I’m not “blocked” from creating a new sub-reddit, by the way. I don’t even think that that’s a thing.

You know what a normal person does when I suggest that they’re gay on Reddit? Nothing. Why would they? They either know that they’re gay so appreciate my understanding in this regard. Or they see the humour in it. Or they say, “Oh, I didn’t realise how my pictures of Kieran Photoshopped as a woman were coming across. Thanks for the information.”

What they don’t do is send thousands of death and rape threats. Only one lunatic does that. Why is this person possibly allowed to continue? The moderators all know that he’s a lunatic who does this shit. But because I call those faggots gay they don’t have a problem with it. They should be deeply ashamed of themselves for any number of reasons, running a fucking homosexual harassment board being one of them.

Anyway, GarbageStabber ended up deleting the three alts that he was using to spam that shit. He was no longer horny and afraid of getting banned. Why? Nothing happens.

This is so unbelievably lazy. Of all the shows in the 2000s that he could have done an episode on, he chose THE SIMPSONS? Couldn’t he choose a show that peaked in the 2000s?

Well, let’s watch. I’m sure that he’ll give a run down of better shows that he could have talked about but didn’t.

0:00 – “But first a word from our sponsor…Bitcher?”

2:00 – He’s giving his autistic definition of when the new millenium began. WE DON’T CARE, JIMMY.

“Do you like when I rant about stupid shit?”

No. It’s boring as anything you ever talk about.

He says that he stopped watching tv in the 2000s so he had to Google all of this. Fucking great.

Malcolm in the Middle, That’s So Raven, Friends, How I Met Your Mother, Spongebob.

Weren’t Friends and Spongebob more 1990s?

“I got to admit, I don’t really know a whole lot about any of those shows.”

So don’t do the video.

3:45 – “I’ve never understood why they’re called Treehouse of Horror because, from what I’ve seen, only the first one actually has a treehouse.”

So there’s your answer, retard. It’s fucking unbelievable.

4:00 – “I especially like the 90s episodes but we’re in the 2000s now.”

James…this is YOUR stupid criteria. If you don’t like it, don’t have the criteria. If you’ve never watched anything past 1999, don’t do episodes on anything past 1999. NOBODY was asking for one episode per decade. You could have done whatever you wanted.

“I sat down and watched every Simpsons Halloween episode from 2000 to 2009.

It just seems idiotic and a waste of time to me.

5:45 – He’s complaining about how the episodes aired in November. Even though he says that he didn’t know this because he never watched any of these when they originally aired. He only knows this from looking at Wikipedia. But he’s outraged by it. Because this means that his autistic criteria, that nobody cares about, hasn’t been met.

I made it to 8:45. He’s just summarising the episode. As usual. I can’t fucking do this.

It’s like James lost his mind. But no. He was always an idiot. We just didn’t know because he used to be controlled by Mike Matei and Mike was must better at puppeting Jimmy than Screenwave are.

You’re watching a literal retard.

How am I going to pad this out? Talking about the Simpsons? What can I say that hasn’t been said a billion times already?

I watched the show. I remember when it first started, I was in, I don’t know, fifth grade or something. One time, I was at a Cub Scouts meeting in the “rectory” and a friend of mine found a piece of cardbord with a zig zag pattern cut at the top. Like Bart’s hair. So he held the piece of cardboard behind his head and said, “I’m Bart Simpson, who are you?” He couldn’t say “hell” because we were in the “rectory” and our “den mother” was with us.

Then there were a couple of kids who were drawing Simpsons characters for 25 cents each. And they were really making a racket. It was all the rage. Everyone wanted a picture. They couldn’t keep up with demand.

When the teachers found out, they shut it down. They said that all proceeds had to go to the church. What? Why? They’re just selling drawings. How is that a sin? But the teachers were presenting this as though it was some big moral failing on these kids.

So by the time I got on board and asked the guy for a picture he said that the business was already shut down. Because they weren’t going this shit and then give the money to the church. That’s idiotic.

We had uniforms but but gym we got to wear whatever we wanted. But if you wore a Simpsons shirt, you had to turn it inside out. This was something that schools were doing all over the country. It was in the news. That’s how the idea spread.

So one day, I saw the principal’s son with his t-shirt inside out. I said, “Why is your t-shirt inside out?” He said, “Shut up.” Then I looked at it closer and I said, “Oh.” His father was also the gym teacher.

I watched the show up until I left the US in the mid 2000s. In the UK, you needed like cable in order to watch new episodes but they showed repeats from the start of the show to maybe two years before the current year every day so I’d watch that.

When I was in the US, I bought the first four seasons of the DVDs. Those came in handy in the UK because whenever I moved, I wouldn’t have the internet for a few days, up to a couple of weeks. An engineer had to arrive to turn the internet on. So I’d watch the DVDs to keep me entertained.

Is that it for my Simpsons stories? I think it might be. Oh, I had the comics too. I had a few Radioactive Man comics, I had the first Simpsons comic from Bongo, I had the earlier Simpsons comic from Welsh Publishing, and I had the first Bartman comic. I didn’t buy any others, I was just speculating. Trying to save for my retirement. None of that shit is worth anything.

That was it. I liked the show but I wasn’t getting the merchandise. Was there even merchandise? I had t-shirts, I guess. Bootleg and authentic. I bet those bootleg shirts might be worth something today, as a rarity, but my mother threw everything out, of course.