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  • SWAMP ZOMBIES 2: Commentary track – Newt Wallen

    He’s doing some kind of RiffTrax thing. I guess that he’s going to deliver the commentary over the movie. But you have to find the movie yourself and try to marry this up.

    I think that I found the movie here:

    https://ok.ru/video/1982438967889

    I suspect that I’m quickly going to get things out of sync but who really cares? I’m not going to watch this fucking 72 minute piece of shit anyway. I just did a quick skim and Horseface is in it and Sheriff Lobo or whatever the fuck that guy’s name was. So we’ve got some real superstars in the entertainment industry here.

    1:15 – “Great way to start the movie. You’ve got pierced boobs and blue hair…”

    I’m already bored with this. 72 minutes of tits and gore? Newt, I’ve got other stuff that I could be doing. I don’t give a shit about this.

    If you’re watching the video, there’s a shocking bad fight scene at about 1.15 from somebody who Newt describes as a former Playboy playmate. This woman has clearly never thrown a kick or a punch in her life.

    Video 3:15 – More shockingly bad fight scenes but this time from men. And it’s just the choreography that’s terrible. They’re throwing like roundhouse kicks and blocking them with roundhouse kicks. This isn’t how any fight has ever gone down. It’s not even physically possible for this to happen. And this is a prison fight? People in prison exchange awkward roundhouse kicks?

    5:15 – Newt says that the actor (or somebody) wasn’t happy with the fight scenes in that prison. I can see why. People get thrown into walls despite the fact that the kick sent them in a different direction. The fights were almost all kicks. Bad kicks. Kicks from angles that don’t make sense. And it ended with a terrible…some kind of dual split kick that nobody on earth has ever used in a real fight, certainly not in a prison, and the guy who delivered the kick did so really poorly.

    8:30 – Newt says that he “put $3000” into this “movie”. He, rightly, doesn’t even say “invested”. He just “put it” into the “movie”. He might as well have put that $3000 into the toilet. Same return.

    10:15 – Newt says that the name “Schlock and Awe Films” came about from his “partnership” with his “former girlfriend Crystal Quin”. I’ll just move on.

    Video 10:15 – Written by Newt Wallen. And there’s a picture of him. Newt says that he only wrote 60 pages and it was cobbled together from various abandoned pieces of shit.

    11:15 – Christie Berger was also in this. Newt says, “I miss her so fucking much.” This is the woman who died of cancer and Newt made a series of videos talking about much he enjoyed fucking her up the ass.

    15:45 – Kieran worked on this film in some capacity. Newt just kind of glosses over this. Kieran had negative things to say about Newt from that whole plagiarism thing.

    Video 18:30 – Newt says that this woman has big boobs. Umm…maybe my idea of big boobs has been warped by 1990s big bust porn stars like Minka or Lisa Lipps or Honey Mellons but…no.

    Video 22:00 – Newt describes this as “the weird sex scene”. Well, maybe she does have big boobs.

    You guys like tits, right? And gore? Well, strap in. This is what Newt provides. In the one movie that he had some involvement in. And nobody has ever watched. And can only be found on some weird Russian website.

    Video 25:00 – More shockingly bad fight scenes. Look, if you don’t have anybody who can do the moves and you don’t have a decent fight choreographer, have the characters resolve their differences in some other way. Because this is bad. REALLY bad.

    Video 28:30 – Some fat guy who was one of Newt’s employees at the movie theater is being disemboweled and Newt says that Joe from Movie Dumpster did the effects. I think this is the guy who isn’t the faggot moderator on Reddit.

    Video 27:15 – PVC Bondage Guy appears as a green haired zombie, “With her titty out.”

    I have to say that I missed the “titty” and I’m not going to rewind and I’m not interested.

    Video 28:15 – Newt is in the movie along with Justin Daniels…I think this is some guy who was on Pegwarmers. He had a beard and had a wife who talked about My Little Pony. They were all pretty weird. I might be the only one who gets these Pegwarmers references.

    Video 30:15 – Horseface.

    31:15 – “I wrote the kiss in just to see if she would do it because her boyfriend at the time was there.”

    Newt boasting about being a creepy scumbag.

    31:30 – “She may hate my guts and tell me that she wishes that she never met me but very, very good actress.”

    Umm…I have the sound off in the video and I’m not going to rewind but I am quite confident that Horseface is not a good actress.

    31:45 – Newt describes the kiss as “awkward” and then says, “I took her virginity. She has nothing to say.”

    More creepy bullshit from the Ideas Man.

    43:00 – Newt says that a lot of people didn’t show up for the movie so the people who did show up had to play multiple roles. He continues that there was supposed to be a lot more “T&A” in the movie. He’s talked about his disappointment in this before. He’s a complete piece of shit. With no talent whatsoever.

    Video 46:15 – PVC Bondage Guy with his breasts out again. I guess. I missed it again. I’m watching in this tiny player. I’ll just rewind. It’s going to make this all out of sync but who cares? I think I’m done watching this shit anyway.

    Even full screen it’s tough to see anything. I mean…you can jerk off to that if you’re so inclined but…I’m not so inclined.

    52:00 – Newt says that Florida Man Saves Christmas is based on this fat bearded guy who was on some Pegwarmers videos.

    Video 53:00 – Horseface in her underpants. Eugh. And Newt is talking about how he intentionally wrote this scene to see Horseface in her underpants.

    54:30 – “But yeah, we get an attractive actress in a red bra.”

    Who? Horseface? No, Newt. Get your fucking eyes checked.

    By the way, at about 58:00 in the Youtube video, Newt gets a phone call so pauses the video and then everything gets out of sync. His words aren’t matching his mouth moving.

    1:01:00 – Newt says that they’re just making it up as they go now. For the ending. They didn’t bother writing a proper ending so it’s just ad-libbed. Poorly, presumably.

    I’m stopping the video. I’m stopping the movie at 1:02:00. I know it’s almost finished but I can’t fucking do this. This thing literally gave me diarrhoea. I have to go defecate. And I don’t want to come back and watch even one more second of this complete and utter trash.

    , , ,

  • John Riggs Really Enjoys Musical Theatre

    “I’m a huge fan of musicals and looking forward to Wicked, but hoping it’s not like Rent where half the songs were just spoken.”

    Uh huh. Musical theatre, you say. About The Wizard of Oz even. He’s a real friend of Dorothy.

    I saw Wicked twice. This was in London, years ago. I took some Asian skank who I don’t even remember who it was now. And then I went when I had family visiting.

    The main thing I remember is the giant tits of the woman who played…I don’t know, one of the witches. I scanned the programme that had a picture of her on it but I can’t find it.

    But yeah, I went to the theatre a lot when Iw as living in London. I was trying to impress the ladies with how cultured I was. But I fucking hated it. The fucking faggots working there who give you attitude. They don’t like seeing heterosexual couples. The high price of this shit. The fact that 90% of the audience is over the age of 65. The pretentiousness of it all.

    It’s just buffoons prancing around and embarrassing themselves. I wasn’t enriched by watching this. I don’t think that it made me a better person.

    In the 12th grade, I was taking a class with a 9th grader. It was like an architecture class. Anybody could take it. All grades. Wasn’t much demand for this class so they just put everybody together.

    And one of the kids was a real nerd. Well, all of the ninth graders were pretty nerdy. They mostly kept to themselves. There were about three of them.

    Then one day, I’m at some talent show or something and one of these kids gets on stage on starts singing Swinging on a Star. As he’s singing about carrying moonbeams home in a jar, I’m thinking, “What the fuck? Is this really happening? This kid just bought four years of abuse.”

    But the next day in that class, everybody was congratulating him and talking about how awesome it was. Even the black 12th grader was all like, “Yo, yo, yo. Mad props to you, bro. So do you want to be a mule or what?”

    Then the teacher comes in. The teacher was some old, gruff guy. And he’s laughing and joking with this guy over this humiliating performance where this kid was singing in falsetto about the various animals that he wants to be.

    I couldn’t fucking believe it. But good for him. I’m glad everything worked out. The guy took a chance and it paid off. I guarantee that that guy is getting fucked in the ass now, though.

    What else…musical theatre…oh, I worked with a horrible woman who claimed to be an “actor”. Every day she would come into work and remind everybody, loudly and repeatedly, that she’s an actor. She never said “actress”. She always used the PC term of “actor”. Around 2010, “actress” started to become a sexist term for whatever reason so everybody was just an “actor”, regardless of gender.

    So she’d come in and say, “I’m an actor. I do (whatever) because I’m an actor. And I do (whatever else) because I’m an actor.” She’d use a lot of profanity and say, “I use a lot of profanity because I’m an actor.” Shit like this. It was fucking infuriating. I could not fucking stand it. She was horrible. She was the obnoxious person I’ve ever encountered.

    And she wasn’t a fucking actor. If she was an actor, she wouldn’t be working here. She would do some Snow White play during the Christmas period. For whatever reason, Snow White plays are popular in the UK during Christmas. They’re for children. Children go to these things. And she had some small role in one of the many productions of Snow White that get performed throughout the country.

    I could not listen to that woman any more. Every fucking day. She was so fucking loud. And we’re all trying to do work. She was just constantly talking about herself and how awesome she is with some of the impressionable young women who worked there.

    So I told the women who owned the company that they either separate me from this woman or I’m quitting. There were numerous complaints about this woman, by the way. She was totally unprofessional. But one of the women who owned the company did some community theatre type thing and was enamoured with this woman so refused to fire her.

    They did separate us, though. We would go to different venues. So I didn’t have to be in the same building as her. For the most part. Whenever they did put us together, I was sure to raise a stink.

    God, I forgot her name. I used to know it and I’d be able to look her up on IMDB. She had a tiny role in something, years ago. She’s an actor.

    Oh, I remember it now.

    I found her Twitter. First word in the description is “Actor”.

    She hasn’t tweeted in years.

    Handful of followers.

    She has four credits on IMDB. One was a short film. A student film, presumably. Her last role was a few years ago, an appearance on an episode of a tv show.

    Her headshots are all over the place. She’s not even an attractive woman.

    Oh, I found her “management company.” She’s more active on the stage. “Person number 7” and “Company” type roles. One every year or two.

    Anyway, fuck that bitch. And fuck John Riggs.

  • Is My Bloody Valentine 3D Better Than The Original? – Tony from Hack The Movies

    Annoying pink filter on this. You know…because it’s Valentine’s Day.

    Tony is with that anti-abortion Jesus nut.

    0:30 –

    Tony: Last year, we were both single, talking about the movie Valentine. Now you’re in a very happy relationship.

    Jesus Nut: Aw, thank you. I am.

    Tony: And I’m not.

    Do you suppose this Jesus nut is having pre-marital sex? Normally, I wouldn’t speculate on such a thing, but…what’s her actual name…Casey. Oh yes. Casey J Hempel. It’s coming back to me. So Casey is a total Jesus freak. And not in a “Hey, I believe that salvation can only come through Jesus but that’s just me” kind of way. More in a “Hey, let’s go protest outside of this abortion clinic” kind of way.

    So do you suppose she’s getting fucked by this boyfriend? She’s saving herself for marriage, right? Must be tough in this day and age. You basically have to find another Christian fundamentalist. And even then I have to imagine that it’s difficult.

    I remember in the tenth grade, some teacher announcing that she’s getting married. And some kid asked if she had sex before marriage. He was just asking to be outrageous. And the teacher said, “I don’t think that’s any of your business.” And some other kid threatened to beat this guy up if he keeps asking questions like this. White knighting, if you will.

    But it’s a valid question. It was a Catholic school. We were told some really weird fucking shit. No sex before marriage. No jerking off. No using condoms. Sex is just to be done between married people and just for procreation.

    I probably told this story before but I had a theology class in the 10th grade where the teacher was talking about the best way to store a car. “You wouldn’t just leave it out, would you?” Well, loads of people do that but…I guess the answer you’re looking for is no? “You wouldn’t just put a tarp on it, would you?” Well…that would be a real hassle taking the tarp on and off every day but I guess if you’re really concerned about your car, you can do that. “No, the best thing to do is to keep it in the garage!”

    The car was a euphanism for your penis and the garage was a euphamism for abstinence. The tarp was a euphamism for a condom.

    But cars are meant to be driven. And it’s just going to depreciate in value sitting in your garage, no matter how well it’s stored. Even if you have a heated garage, that Ford Fiesta is just losing value every day. You might as well take it out and have some fun. Fuck the roads of America.

    1:15 – Shout out to Casey’s sister who just got engaged.

    Do you suppose Casey’s sister is getting fucked? Is Casey’s sister a Jesus nut too?

    1:45 –

    Tony: I’m going to stay single just to relate to you all.

    Jesus Nut: In God’s perfecting timing.

    IT DOESN’T EVEN MAKE SENSE! What is she talking about? But some more fucking Jesus nut shit.

    She’s probably getting fucked in the ass as like a loophole against the whole sex before marriage thing.

    But where does the bible even say that you can’t have sex before marriage? Let me look this up.

    Apparently nowhere. There are verses about adultery, of course but nothing expressly prohibiting sex before marriage.

    Oh, here’s an interesting one.

    “If a man seduces a virgin who is not engaged, and lies with her, he must pay a dowry for her to be his wife.” – Exodus 22:16

    So you can fuck Casey but then you have to pay some goats afterwards and marry her. How many goats is she worth? It’s got to be at least three.

    Here’s another good one:

    “No one of illegitimate birth shall enter the assembly of the Lord; none of his descendants, even to the tenth generation, shall enter the assembly of the Lord.” – Deuteronomy 23:2

    So if you were born outside of wedlock or ANY of your ancestors for the past TEN generations, you can never get into Heaven. What kind of bullshit is that?

    Let’s say a generation is 25 years. So if there’s somebody born today, if any of their ancestors going all the back to the year 1775 were born out of wedlock, they’re totally fucked. They can be the most pious person in the universe but because their colonial great great….great grandmother was a slut, they’re out. There’s nothing they can do. They’ll never get into Heaven.

    Casey believes this crazy bullshit?

    But about that anal stuff, that’s a legtimate thing that some religious people do. They’ll get fucked in the ass because they don’t want to have sex before marriage.

    But what about all the anti-sodomy stuff in the bible? I know it wasn’t expressly the dick in the ass that was talked about. It was just about dudes getting it on with dudes. So does it not apply to women? What is it about dudes getting it on with dudes that got God so angry that he destroyed two cities? The buttfucking, right? What else could it be? So it very well could apply to men fucking women up the ass too.

    There’s a lot of crazy stuff in that bible.

    So anyway, Tony is going to talk about this movie that I don’t care about for 90 minutes. Well, you can do that, Tony. It’s well within your rights. There’s nothing in the bible against boring people, I guess. But I’m not going to watch it.

    https://www.instagram.com/caseythefinalgirl/

    There’s that Jesus nut’s Instagram. A lot of pictures of her in a bikini. Probably stuff in the bible about modesty. Her boyfriend has tattoos. I think that the bible forbids tattoos. Let me look this up.

    “You shall not make gashes in your flesh for the dead, or incise any marks on yourselves.” – Leviticus 19:28

    Right there. Leviticus has all the good stuff. As far as I’m concerned, fuck all the other books in the bible, just give me Leviticus.

    It must be terrifying to live in a world where EVERYBODY is going to hell. Including, presumably, you. How can you not? Read the fucking bible. Anything you do, you’re fucked. And it doesn’t even have to be anything that you did. If one of your ancestors from ten generations ago did something, you’re fucked.

    Who even knows their family history that far back? Especially in olden times. There was no Ancestry dot com in biblical days. So wouldn’t it always gnaw at you? “I really hope none of my ancestors for the past ten generations had a child outside of wedlock.”

    What do you suppose the percentage is of people alive today who have an ancestor in the past ten generations who was born outside of wedlock? It’s got to be well over 99%.

    So anyway, this has been Bible Corner. I’m going to go jack off in my wool and linen pants now.

    ,

  • Is Being A Content Creator A Viable Career? – Zap Cristal

    146 views after 12 days.

    This would be like me doing an article called “Can You Get Rich from Blogging?” I mean…I don’t know…maybe? But I’m not. I’m getting nothing from this.

    1:00 – It’s the RE-wind segment where they talk about stuff that they talked about in “season 1”. So they’re already out of ideas.

    2:00 – Zap makes some kind of a noise. I think it was supposed to be like tape being rewound. Mr Wright Way II says I have no idea what that was. Zap explains that it was “1980s internet.”

    Umm…yeah. Some of that 1980s internet. Remember that? What the fuck.

    Then Mr Wright Way II suggests that it was AOL. AOL in the 1980s.

    When did AOL actually start? 1983. They had an online service for the Atari 2600. What? Obviously nobody had that. I’ve never heard of it.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/AOL

    Well, maybe this is what Zap and Mr Wright Way II are talking about. 1980s AOL. I stand corrected.

    Mr Wright Way II is making vague comments about people with “fake” personas who make podcasts. He’s really upset about this.

    You know what would be great? If Mr Wright Way II put on a fake persona of a guy who has something interesting to say.

    THIS IS BORING AS FUCK. I’m just going to leave it on as background noise while I talk about other stuff.

    Today, I went out for lunch at my favourite place. The food is awful, it’s expensive, but nobody was ever in there. You know, because the food was awful and expensive. But I’d go because you have the place to yourself. I’d go to the tables downstairs and literally nobody in there.

    The last time I was there was probably in December or early January. The downstairs seating area was closed off. Well, fuck.

    Today I go there, and it’s closed. Signs are removed. There’s a little thing in the window explaining that they’re closed for good.

    14:30 – Mr Wright Way II is saying that successful “Youtubers” have committed suicide. He’s presenting this as a reason not become a successful “Youtuber”. Oh my fucking god. Don’t worry, Mr Wright Way II. You will never be a successful “Youtuber” and have to deal with the stress of fame and fortune.

    Anyway, back to my restaurant story. What the fuck am I going to do now? It was the worst burrito in town. Vaguely Mexican food prepared by Polish immigrants. £10 for a burrito. A TERRIBLE burrito.

    16:30 – Zap says, “Success is whatever it means to you.” She’s quoting from some “mentor” of hers. Or maybe she just read it on a menu from a Chinese restaurant. But anyway, it seems that “success” to Zap Cristal is getting 146 views on your video after 12 days.

    So now I don’t know what to do for lunch. I didn’t go there all the time but I’d go there when Subway looked too crowded.

    There’s also a better Mexican restaurant but there usually aren’t any seats at lunch time.

    So I don’t know. I’m going to have to look. My main issue is finding a place that isn’t crowded. I don’t like the anxiety of waiting in line to order and hoping that there’s still an open seat somewhere. Because if there isn’t you’re fucked. Although, this has never happened to me. The possibility still exists. Then what am I going to do? Eat while walking like Retro Ali?

    Retro Ali told a story years ago about how she was living in South Korea and eating while walking and people gave her dirty looks. Ali thought that this was some weird cultural thing. No. It’s universal. Don’t fucking eat while walking. I’m not saying that I’ve never done it but I’m saying that I know that it’s behaviour that’s frowned upon.

    I’m stopping this video, by the way . I can’t do it. I made it to 22:00. Mr Wright Way II is talking about his channel and how nothing he does can influence whether or not he gets subscribers. MAKE GOOD VIDEOS. That’s how you get subscribers.

    I didn’t become the number one blog about women retro video game Youtubers by putting out crap. Only high-quality articles.

    For example, there’s no loud music playing while you’re reading this. Because that would be annoying as fuck. Who wants that? But that’s what they do with this awful podcast.

    I’m not sitting here in a track suit talking to a black man about nothing. I’m talking about my lunch. That’s eminently more interesting.

    And as a result, I get more views than the Zap Cristal and Mr Wright Way II podcast. You get back what you put in. Give people what they want. What they want is good content. That’s universal. What they don’t want is crap. Crap is bad. Try to avoid making crap.

    These people I write about just don’t seem to get this fundamental idea. Make GOOD videos. What’s so hard about that? Fuck these shitty videos. Let’s see something good. “No, we’ll stay the course on the shitty videos and just see how that goes.”

    It’s crazy. If you don’t have the ability to produce good videos, then get a job at Jiffy Lube. There’s no shame in that. The shame is only in doing something that you’re bad at. There’s enough trash in the world. We don’t need more of it. Put something good out into the world, whether it’s good lube jobs or whatever your skillset may be. Making Youtube videos isn’t it.

    Newt talks about “positivity” but he creates nothing but trash. He’s effectively polluting the world with his idiotic, terrible bullshit. We’re supposed to praise that? We’re supposed to praise trash? It’s not happening, Newt. I’d only be adding to the negativity of the world by praising trash like Shark Vampire or some video where Newt is in a hotel with a crack addict. I’m bringing light into the world by condemning that bullshit.

    Newt has it all twisted. It’s like a hobo taking a shit on a crowded train and then when everybody flees in revulsion, the hobo says, “Hey, come on guys. Stop being so negative. I’m just doing my thing here. This is art.”

    Karma will come for Newt. Newt has been a destructive, negative influence for everyone around him his entire life, as far as I’m aware. We’re supposed to praise this guy and his disgusting actions lest we be “negative”. Not happening, Newt. You’re the piece of shit. You’re the one who needs to stop what he’s doing.

  • Retro Ali is Back Making Videos!

    Well…kind of. She’s doing “shorts”. And she’s doing it as her anime girl avatar. Because she gained 50 pounds and can no longer bring herself to appear on screen.

    I haven’t talked about Retro Ali in a while. Her thing was “reaction” videos where she would “react” to mundande things by screaming and doing an o-face like a chimp. Obviously exaggerated. Obviously just an attempt to pull in horntards.

    She’s doing the exact same thing now but with her anime avatar. Are you fucking kidding me? Does she honestly think that this is going to work?

    So what happens in this video, please do not watch it, is you see Ali’s fat hands going through a newly-opened deck of Pokemon cards. And her anime avatar is at the top of the screen.

    She reaches a card that she wants and she starts screaming like a fucking baboon. And the anime character’s face changes slightly because the anime character is vaguely linked to Ali’s actual facial expressions (which she refuses to show because she’s now overweight).

    We’re supposed to jerk off to this? To a cartoon girl opening her eyes slightly? THIS is going to change the world of erotica?

    It’s the dumbest fucking thing in the universe. I HATED Retro Ali’s videos. Every fucking video was the same. She’s watching “Nintendo Direct” or something and will make stupid, exagerated faces like she’s getting fucked in the ass by Electabuzz.

    And the retards in the comments would say, “Yeah! You looked really cute when you made the o-face! I came twice!”

    It’s completely insulting to even a retard’s intelligence. Why is she so invested in these stupid commercials? Take a fucking Valium. I have NEVER been as excited about ANYTHING as Retro Ali was these fucking COMMERCIALS.

    So she’s taking that same “winning” formula and applying to to her anime character. This is never going to work, Ali. Just go on a fucking diet. It’s not that hard.

    I was watching Mike stream some Ninja Turtles hack for five hours recently. Somebody in the chat suggested that he get in on this anime girl avatar action. Mike declined and said that the only people who do that are people who are afraid to get on camera.

    That’s clearly what it is. Retro Ali gained 50 pounds and suddenly doesn’t appear on camera any more. It’s this stupid fucking anime girl.

    I can’t understand the audience for this. She has a boring as fucking personality too so it can’t be that. You want to watch a boring anime girl screaming like a jackass over mundane stuff? Why? Who’s doing that? Who has this fetish?

  • The Complete Bullshit of Corona Virus aka Covid

    Searching for Sonic merch – SuperVideoGameGal

    I was reading the above blog article recently from October 2020. In it, Super Retro Gal aka Super Video Game Gal aka Super Awkward Gal talked about losing her job at Disney (due to covid layoffs) and she wears a mask throughout the entire video, even when she’s in the car with nobody else inside other than her dog.

    When was the first lockdown? March 2020. So this was seven months into this completely despicable more or less global “lockdown” over a fucking cold.

    March 2020 to July 2021. And then for months after that, they continued with the fearmongering. Oh, there’s a new strain of covid that’s deadlier than all the other ones put together. Now there’s another one that’s even more deadly. Now monkey pox is back. Not even joking. Remember when monkey pox was back in the news?

    What happened to all of this? What happened to all of the people who said that people who don’t get the vaccine should be put in prison? What happened to the media for hyping this bullshit? What happened to the politicians for implementing this insane bullshit? Why did virtually every government in the world march in lockstep on this? For a cold?

    It was all just forgotten. All of those people who lost their jobs. All of those small and medium businesses who went out of business. All of those students who are now years behind in their education. Oopsie. It was nothing. Hehe. That’s why pencils have erasers.

    Massive profits for Amazon and big business and politicians and their cronies, though. That’s what this was about. And if they could still get away with it, we’d still be in lockdown. But we’re sick of this fucking bullshit. Enough people were seeing through the lies. Omicron. Delta. Omega. I don’t give a fuck. Go through the entire Greek alphabet. This doesn’t impress me.

    If you really search the news, you’ll see that covid is still around and as deadly as ever. If this is true, why is nobody talking about it? Why have the vaccines stopped? Why has all research seemingly ended? Why aren’t we all wearing masks? Why aren’t we still social distancing?

    How come nobody as the grocery store is saying that I can’t get three cans of Pringles any more? “I’ll let you slide this time but remember, there’s a limit of two items per customer.” “Oh, thank you so much, Mr Cashier Man. You’re really doing your part to save us all.”

    Or what about the cashier who chastised me for being three feet away from the person in front of me instead of the requisite six? She really saved the planet that day.

    I intentionally wore a ridiculous, useless “mask”. Because there were no requirements for what you had to wear. You just had to wear SOMETHING over your face. It could be made of anything. So I got some kind of…neck gaiter, I guess it’s called? One of these things:

    Cost £3. Did nothing. None of these masks that anyone wore did anything. But it got people to shut the fuck up with their bullshit rules that made no fucking sense.

    I was at work, towards the end of these ridiculous restrictions, “Oh, can everybody put their masks on?” Really? You think this £3 “neck gaiter” is going to save you from this deadly virus that’s killing everyone? You have a lot of confidence in this thin piece of porous cotton.

    Then it just ended and we don’t hear anything about it.

    Is anybody going to admit that they were wrong? Because clearly people were wrong. If covid is this deadly thing that required shutting the world down and it’s still with us, as deadly as ever, why is nothing being done any more?

    These lunatics who were saying that people who don’t the vaccine should be round up and shot, where are they now? Have any of them reflected on that and realised that they were swept up in hysteria? Do they want to apologise for their behaviour now?

    People now recognise the hysteria that surrounded 9/11 and the destructive legislation that was pushed through and the immoral war that resulted. When are we going to get apologies over the insane reaction to covid?

    Not that it matters. None of this was an accident. The people at the top orchestrated all of this, whether we’re talking about the erosion of human rights and the war for oil with 9/11 or the profiteering and class warfare against the 99% with covid.

    But I’m talking about the average person. The person who bought this insane bullshit that was hyped by the Jewish media. How could anybody be stupid enough to believe any of that utter nonsense? We’re supposed to be afraid an illness that has flu-like symptoms and a flu-like death rate? And staying six feet away from everyone and wearing a flimsy piece of cloth is going to protect you from that? You didn’t finish the biology chapter in your fourth grade science class?

    You couldn’t travel anywhere. You couldn’t work. For fucking this. And these cretins bought it and turned against people who didn’t buy it. And wished death on them. And made it a political issue.

    Erin told us to check in our elderly neighbours to see if they need anything at the shop. Why? They can go to the shops, Erin. There’s nothing to be afraid of.

    James Rolfe ceased all production and lived like Howard Hughes in his later years.

    Pam aka CannotBeTamed boasted on Twitter every time she got a vaccine and encouraged you, the reader, to be responsible and do likewise.

    When are these people going to admit that they were wrong and apologise?

    ,

  • PVC Bondage Guy Uses a Chequebook

    We’ve reached rock bottom. I’m talking about PVC Bondage Guy using a chequebook. By the way, I know it’s “checkbook” in the US. And “cheque” is one of the gayer British spellings. Nothing beats “tyre” for “tire”, though. So just bear with me while I use “cheque”. We all what I’m talking about.

    19:00 – PVC Bondage Guy says that she carries her chequebook with her.

    I’m trying to think of the last time that I’ve used a cheque. I used to get them in the UK for my first few yeras of living here, I guess. This would have been like 2005 to 2007. But it’s been a very long time since I’ve had one. I don’t even know if it’s an option to get them any more. I don’t remember ever using them but I had the actual book.

    In the US, I remember they would show you a book of all the different pretty cheque designs you can order. Cheques with flowers on them or birds or rainbows or whatever. As a man, I just went with the regular blue cheques. But I don’t remember ever writing a cheque anywhere for anything.

    Rent? Yeah, I must have used cheques for rent, I guess. I wasn’t giving cash. And there was no way to pay with credit cards. The landlord was just the woman who lived downstairs.

    Oh, the taekwondo classes were paid for with cheque but that was my mother paying. She used cheques a lot. Even for buying groceries and whatnot.

    Anyway, it’s been at least 20 years since I’ve used a cheque. What the fuck. Everybody has a debit card.

    Although, saying all of this, some people do pay me by cheque for jobs that I do. It’s so fucking old-fashioned, though. They have my fucking bank details. They can easily transfer the money. No, let’s post a cheque like a caveman.

    But I think that the US is considerably lagging the UK in terms of banking services. I mean, we can see an example right here. PVC Bondage Guy, a hip young man, is still using fucking cheques. If the facilities existed to do an online bank transfer or use a debit card, surely she would do that.

    19:30 – Newt says that he had a landlord, I think fairly recently, who insisted on payment by cheque and wouldn’t even allow him to post it. And this landlord lived two and a half hours away. Who the fuck would do this?

    Well, not scumbag Newt. He’d send his employees, who worked in a movie theatre, to go visit his landlord.

    This all demonstrates the medieval landlord/tenant situation that still exists in the US, the employment situation, and the banking system. Absolutely none of this shit would go on in the UK. People have rights here. People have fairly easy access to justice. If some piece of shit employer told me to do his personal errands, they’d soon find themselves before an employment tribunal.

    19:45 – PVC Bondage Guy says, “I write cheques because I frequently have to deal with bureaucracy.”

    She gives the example of her passport expiring soon. Right…so you transfer the money via online banking, right? Apparently not in the US. Cheques.

    She gets speeding tickets. Right…cheques again? It seems so. The fucking courts don’t accept debit or credit cards? It’s unbelievable.

    22:15 – PVC Bondage Guy starts talking about his bra size. Something about DD being the same as E. Umm…how am I doing down there? Oh. Totally flaccid. Well, keep trying with this desperate shit, I guess. Can we get back to the cheque talk? Maybe that would get the blood flowing.

    By the way, really unflattering outfit from PVC Bondage Guy today. She doesn’t seem to get it. Sure, you can dress like a whore but it’s only going to look flattering on…let’s just say certain body types. PVC Bondage Guy needs to class it up.

    And what happened to the titular PVC bondage outfits? She just moved on, I guess. Those were not flattering either but at least she was more covered up.

    23:45 – PVC Bondage Guy says that she wears clothing between a “small” and a “large”. Uh huh. I mean…maybe? Maybe she’s buying a small prostitute outfit and squeezing her large frame into it. But that doesn’t mean that she’s a “small”.

    Anyway, I’m done with this shit.

    , ,

  • Are Fake Gamers A Problem? – Lady Decade

    I’m going to try to get through this video. It’s nearly twenty minutes long. Lady Decade has a painful, shrill, cut-glass accent that I don’t ever want to listen to. That’s why she’s not in the rotation. She’s nowhere near the rotation. But we have a relevant topic, it seems.

    0:00 – “Oh yes. Fake gamer girl: a pejorative term that is thrown at someone at literally every female gaming content creator online who shares their passion for the hobby on the information superhighway.”

    You already lost me. First of all, terrible grammar. Bear in mind that this was written out. She’s reading this. And she wrote, “Term that is thrown at someone at lierally every female gaming content creator.” Doesn’t make sense. Did I hear it wrong? I listened to this ten times. There was a word or two that I couldn’t make out nearer the beginning of the sentence but I think they weren’t important.

    But secondly, I don’t think that people are insulting female “gamers” unfairly. When somebody is genuinely interested in video games, I think it’s obvious and people don’t have a problem with them. Equally, it’s obvious when somebody isn’t interested in video games and these people should rightly be called out.

    Take, for example, Pam aka CannotBeTamed. She’s genuinely interested in video games. Sure, I write about her, but I don’t focus on her being a fake gamer. I focus on her being boring as shit and fucking her dog.

    But Erin? Erin is a total fraud. A blind man can see it. Hence, the blog. I was so outraged by this unabashed charlatan that I made it my life’s mission to expose her.

    Everyone else who I write about is just to pad things out. Erin is the only 100% fake “gamer” who I write about. Even if you look at Destiny Fomo, for example, let’s assume, rightly, that all of her games belong to her pimp. I’ve heard Madam Fomo speaking off the cuff about video games and she was speaking in a semi-knowledgeable fashion. She clearly knows at least something about video games.

    Erin is a total fake.

    I would never start a blog based on Pam or Retro Ali or Bobdunga or whatever. But Erin? That’s something special. That is somebody who is so transparently clueless about video games that the world has to know. It’s shockingly obvious that she knows nothing about video games. The brazenness of it all. It’s noteworthy.

    By the way, I’m 30 seconds in and there are a lof “sexy” (revolting) shows of Lady Decade. For example, she “sensually” blows into a game cartridge. Then there’s a shot of her with her stocking-clad legs up on a desk playing Super Mario Bros.

    Whoa. Did my pants just get tighter? No, they’re suprisingly roomy.

    I’m a minute in and her argument thus far is that anyone who claims that any woman isn’t genuinely interested in video games has never had sex with a woman and smells bad. I’m not even joking. This is her thesis. It’s not even worth dignifying with a response.

    3:15 – After more insults, claiming that guys who play video games are nerds and bald, she gives an example of somebody who she claims is a legitimate fake “gamer”: Fit Aitana. It’s an AI…thing. That’s what this video is about. She’s going to talk about AI.

    The good news is that I can stop the video here. I don’t have to listen to this woman for one more second.

    You know how you’re not going to grow a channel? With these clickbait titles. Nobody likes to feel like they’ve been taken advantage of. You go to a video expecting one thing and it’s something else, are you going to go back to that channel or are you going to make use of Youtube’s fairly recent but useful “block channel” feature?

    I’m looking at the comments. Most of them are about fake gamers as in human beings. Very few people are talking about AI, which was the subject of the video. So either these people didn’t watch the video or they just don’t give a fuck about the topic.”

    • “When I hear someone call a woamn fake gamer girl I automatically think the speaker is a POS projecting. They are looking frot he attention. If there are fake gamer girls? Who the fuck cares.”

    There’s a well-reasoned argument.

    • “Guys should just date other guys at this point”

    Somebody from that sub-reddit posted, I guess.

    • “I never understood why anyone would fall for these grifters. But then, I get the feeling that to do so would require having an IQ on par with that of a jar of mayonnaise.”

    The people going to Erin’s channel, for example, are literally retarded. So you’re right. But should retards be taken advantage of?

    • “as a female gamer, I can safely say that pretending to be interested in any hobby isnt healthy. not just gaming in particular, but really any hobby. if youre genuinely not interested in something, theres no reason to pretend to be interested in it for social acceptance or something. its simply not healthy”

    • “If you’re not a fake Gamer girl, then don’t worry about what some trolls have to say. Guys are on the attack because fake nerd girls are a serious problem in general. Those fake nerds are sexual predators that prey on lonely nerds (many of which are autistic and don’t know any better) to get their wallets. And now that all producers of nerd products pander to females- all of the products suck and us real fans have been pushed out of our communities and hobbies. Star Wars, for example, is dead now thanks to that shit.”

    So anyway, I went to the dentist today. It’s a Muslim woman. She’s from the Middle East. My previous dentist was a Scottish guy, and he was good, but then he brought this woman in and just pawned me off to her. I could have refused and insisted that I still go to this guy but I didn’t want to look like I was racist or sexist or anti-Muslim. Plus, fuck that guy for pawning me off like that.

    She did a filling six months ago. And then it was really painful when I would eat. So I went back and she lowered the filling. Things were a lot better but there was still sometimes pain when eating.

    Last week, I went for my six month checkup. Everything was fine. Don’t need any work done. But I told her that I still have some pain when eating. So she lowered the filling again.

    Things are better but still not 100%. So I went today for the scaling and polishing. She asked how the filling is and I said it’s better but I still sometimes have this pain. I told her that I don’t want anything done to it any more, though. I’m thinking maybe it will get better, maybe I only notice it when I’m thinking about it, whatever.

    So she looked at the tooth. She said it’s fine. Okay. Then they did the cleaning.

    Afterwards, she said, “Would you like to still see me?” I was confused and said yeah. She starts saying, “If you’ve lost your trust in me, we have other dentists in the surgery who you can see. It’s not a problem. I don’t take it personally.” No. Whatever.

    Frankly, I don’t think that she is very good. But what am I going to do? It’s difficult to find a dentist in this country. There are a lot of really shitty ones out there. I’ve been to them. So it’s a crapshoot. This place is at least semi-professional. There’s no weird shit going on. Nobody is trying to upsell you. Nobody is conning you. Nobody is talking about what a piece of shit you are for not flossing.

    What you want to find is an old man. That’s the ideal dentist. 55+ year old male. There should be a way to search for dentists by age and gender.

  • Destiny Fomo Bought a House

    “Sorry I haven’t been around much, I went out for Starbucks and ended up buying a house lol I just picked up the keys a few days ago and have been trying to get my game room set up. Game Room V.31 on the way.”

    I…guess that she bought a house. She says that she did, anyway. But that game shelf looks like her previous game shelf. It could be anywhere. Do you maybe want to show the house?

    “No, I’ll just take a picture of me smelling my armpit. Thanks anyway.”

    And as usual with Whore Fomo, it’s just cryptic bullshit. She went to Starbucks and she bought a house. Yeah, that’s how it works.

    She’s always light on the details because this is all the proceeds of crime. She’s a prostitute. She’s living with her pimp TuanX. It’s TuanX’s house. TuanX moved.

    I wonder what the horntards actually think about all of this cryptic bullshit that she says. Do they question any of it? Do they not wonder where she seems to be getting all of this money? Because she never talks about a job.

    No. They just blindly congratulate her. “Congratulations on somehow acquiring a house. At least I guess it’s a new house. The shelves look remarkably like your old shelves.”

    • “grats on the house glad your hard work paid off and you got what u were hopeing for cant wait to see how much work you put into the house my friend its been great seening the journey you took to get where you are now”

    So there’s a guy who’s congratulating her on her “hard work”. WHAT HARD WORK? Does he think that her Twitch streams where she goes to the gym with some other whore are paying for any of this? How are these people rationalising how she’s able to afford all of this shit?

    • “Bruh life gains”

    Whore Fomo says, “debt gains lol”

    Which bank is giving mortgages to prostitutes? Aren’t they a high-risk category? “I’d like a 30 year mortgage, please. Occupation? Prostitute.”

    She’ll be 60 years old and still selling that foul-smelling pussy. And if it smells foul now, how foul is it going to be smelling 30 years from now?

    Oh, and this is game room “V.31”. So…this is an alpha build? I don’t think she understands what version numbers mean. Presumably, this is the third room so it would be 3.0 or…for whatever reason she wants to say 3.1. But “V.31”? No. And you’d put the fucking “0” in front anyway. “0.31.” And the “V” isn’t capitalised.

    What a fucking dope. But you know who’s even dumber? The fucking idiot banker who gave a prostitute a mortgage. And every single person who left a comment.

  • My best playthrough of Castlevania on NES so far – Erin Plays

    What in the blue hell is this? Bitch Duo, somebody who is always in Mike’s streams every time that Mike needs somebody to do the bitch work for him in multiplayer games, somebody who designed all of the emotes for Mike and Erin (for free, I assume) has made this abortion of a tv…border thing for the game.

    WHY WOULD ANYBODY WANT THIS? WHY MAKE THE SCREEN ANY SMALLER THAN IT ALREADY IS?

    For fucking this? This stupid fucking tv screen?

    It’s like in those games that give you the option to have a border around the screen. I can’t think of any examples. I think that re-releases of old arcade games sometimes do this. Does anybody actually opt for the border, though?

    This is fucking idiotic. Idiotic idea number ten billion for Erin. She seemingly gets everything wrong.

    I’m already watching in a window. And she has to make the screen smaller to fit her fucking giant webcam footage so that Shishi and the gang can jerk off to this. And now on top of all of that, there’s this fucking idiotic tv screen border. I’m looking at a fucking postage stamp sized gameplay screen now.

    What a complete and fucking moron. Without even starting the video, I’ve got paragraphs about what a fucking retard Erin is. Let’s make the game as difficult to see as possible.

    So she’s playing Castlevania. She’s played it a few times, on stream, for money, and that’s it. That’s the totality of her Castlevania experience. She’s never played it even once in her spare time. She herself has said this numerous times. And yet we’re expected to believe that Erin is some great “gamer” and she’s all about Castlevania.

    0:15 – “So I know the game is smaller but I kind of like it. I don’t know.”

    It’s shit and you’re shit. Bitch Duo is also shit. Mike is shit. ShiShi is shit. Joe from Game Sack is shit. John Riggs is shit. This is all shit. You’re a fucking moron.

    Let’s make the screen smaller for the sake of being “cute”. Hey guys! Remember CRTs?

    Yeah, Erin. I remember. Who gives a shit? Who’s *nostalgic* for shitty picture quality? Boy, I really wish that I had a tv nowadays that I had to wrap tinfoil around the antenna and move it around, and sit in just the right spot, to MAYBE get a picture that isn’t a completely scrambled mess. Then you change the channel and have to go through the whole process all over again. Those were some good times. They should bring that back.

    And is Erin even old enough to remember this? I don’t think so. This is more fucking fake *nostalgia*.

    There’s a lot of stuff edited out of this video, by the way. I’m a minute in and she’s already edited stuff out twice.

    I CAN’T EVEN SEE IT. THIS IS INSANE. WHO WOULD WANT TO WATCH THIS?

    1:00 – “Oh, that’s cool, Edward.”

    Great commentary, Erin. This is her go-to. “That’s cool”. Because she doesn’t know anything about anything and is a total personality blackhole. Mike thinks that this is going to be a success. Keep promoting this fucking bullshit. When do you think it’s going to take off? When she’s 50? 60?

    6:15 – Some guy says that he sold his video game collection and just emulates everything. You want to know what Erin said? You’ll never guess.

    “That’s cool.”

    Is it? Why is it cool, Erin? You don’t have an opinion on this? Can you expand at all on why you find this so cool? It’s not really a comment that warrants, “That’s cool”, is it? People have opinions on emulation. You might say, “Yeah, I can see that. Collections take up a lot of space and if you can just play everything through emulation, why bother?” Or you could say, “I could never do that. I love my video game collection. It has a lot of sentimental value.”

    No. “That’s cool. Moving on. Who else can I say ‘That’s cool’ to?”

    Fucking empty-headed fraud bitch.

    6:45 – “Thanks for hanging out, Joe.”

    Joe from Game Sack, I guess. Well, he finished pretty quickly. Under seven minutes. That’s all he needed. He must have been ready to go. He was warming up with pictures of Newt’s cock.

    9:30 – A horntard asks what Erin’s favourite childhood cereal was. Erin says, “When I was a kid, I didn’t like sugary cereals.”

    Of course you didn’t, Erin. You were raised as part of some cruel experiment to see what would happen if a child is raised by two parents who refuse to engage with their child at all.

    Years ago, I saw or read something about an experiment in the 1960s where a couple tried to raise a chimp like they would a human to see if it would behave like a human. As it turned out, no. It behaved like a chimp. Throwing its faeces and biting people’s faces off and whatnot. So the experiment had to be stopped early.

    But no, Erin was raised like that monkey who had a wireframe mother. I’ve talked about this before so you can just check Wikipedia if you don’t get the reference.

    https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Harry_Harlow

    9:45 – “I was boring and I liked stuff like Wheaties and Honeynut Cheerios.”

    Indeed, Erin. BORING AS FUCK. Boring child, boring adolescent, boring adult.

    10:45 – Erin says that this fucking horrendous fake tv is using some filter to make it look like it’s curved. “I feel like I’m not going to use this layout because people are like, they just want the gameplay to be as is.”

    DO YOU MEAN CLEAR? YES. THAT’S WHAT PEOPLE WANT. FUCK THIS DUMB BULLSHIT. YOU WASTED FUCKING BITCH DUO’S PRECIOUS TIME WITH THIS “CUTE” IDIOCY.

    I’m turning this off. I made it to 12:45. It’s boring as fucking shit and I can’t see anything.

    • “Heo Erin. This looks fine on my phone. 8-bit graphics dont need to be huge, do they? There is nothing to see. They benefit – as i feel nearly all graphics everywhere do – from being made smaller. Everything looks better and more defined.”

    Holy shit. Imagine watching this on a phone. You’d need a magnifying glass. But this fucking jackass is trying to get a date with this. By complimenting her fucking idiotic border.

    • “Pennsylvania girll..howdy neighbor”

    https://www.youtube.com/@kuruptein/videos

    There’s Kuruptein’s channel. This is a woman?

    No. He’s not even pretending to be a woman. I thought it was some weird “trans” thing. It’s just a giant nerd who was referring to Erin as a “girl”. You know, this 40 year old “girl”.

    I’m not saying that this guy is retarded but there’s definitely something off with him.

    Here he is proposing to his girlfriend. I’ll be kind and not mention her weight.

    But two real…eugh…two people who perhaps should not be procreating.

    And he’s skateboarding and he has braces and he has a child-like fascination with old video games. How old is this guy? There’s something off about all of this.

    Anyway, these are Erin’s fans. People who…aren’t quite right all the way up to clear retards.