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SHARK EXORCIST 2 AVAILABLE NOW FROM WILD EYE RELEASING – Newt Wallen
No need to shout, Newt.
This is a rare time when I’ve already watched the video before reviewing it. Well, the first 20 minutes at least. There are so many “hidden gems” in here that I have to go back and watch this again for review purposes.
Newt says that he became BFF’s with Donald Farmer after Donald Farmer wanted to show some piece of shit movie at the theatre that Newt was working in at the time.
1:30 – “The only people who showed up were my former Screenwave friends. Former friends. 8 Bit Eric was there as well, who I’m still friends with.”
Yeah. The guy who you show your penis to, along with Joe from Game Sack.
2:00 – From that experience, where only a few people showed up for this movie, Donald Farmer was apparently so impressed that he offered Newt a job directing his movies. “It was the Redhead, it was the Italian Guy, and it was the Heavyset Guy.”
The reason why Newt uses these stupid names for these people is because they told him to stop fucking talking about them. It’s been YEARS at this point. But Newt continues to talk about them. He doesn’t seem to understand that it’s not their NAMES that’s the problem, it’s talking about them AT ALL. Newt thinks that he gets a free pass if he just talks about the Heavyset Guy instead of Justin Silverman even though we all know it’s Justin Silverman.
So anyway, they shot some scene in the parking lot of Screenwave.
3:15 – Newt digresses by talking about how he grew up watching Donald Farmer films. Uh huh. And he found this inspiring. Newt wanted to grow up and make shitty movies that nobody watches too.
4:00 – Newt starts talking about all the sexy ladies (prostitues) who he befriended (became the johns of) through the course of his “movie” work with Donald Farmer.
5:30 – Newt is talking about this scene that he shot with the Redhead aka Horseface aka Crystal Quin. Or maybe he was just going to shoot. I can’t tell what’s going on. “It would be a lot of this cool underwater, like between her legs, and like going toward her butt underwater, and stuff going over the top because I’m coming in.”
Uh huh. Sounds like a real cinematic masterpiece. And you’re saying that this woman DOESN’T want to talk to you any more? Even after this amazing butt-centric movie that you were filming or planning to film?
6:00 – “It would end with her popping up as a skeleton and still wearing the bikini top and stuff like that.”
Sounds like a real piece of shit, Ideas Man. What else have you got?
7:30 – He’s talking about some other scene, from the same movie, the same movie that never got made, that he was going to shoot involving the Redhead. Even though it’s a different character. Same actress, different character, same movie. The Redhead is just every character. The Redhead is his muse, after all.
7:45 – “So obviously all that stuff happens. I lose my job, I lose my friends, and all of this kind of stuff.”
For wholesale plagiarism and saying heinous stuff to them. Go on.
So after he got fired, Donald Farmer contacted Screenwave to try to get this footage of Horseface’s ass. Screenwave declined. They also, allegedly, deleted the footage. There’s some lost media that Bobdunga could search for. The Lost Footage of Horseface’s Ass.
8:30 – After Screenwave deleted the footage (allegedly) Donald Farmer asked Newt if he wanted to direct a different scene for the movie. Even though he lost the footage of this other scene. Newt agreed and that’s when Newt hooked up with Fallon the Old Prostitute. He hadn’t spoken to her since Satan’s Slumberparty, “This movie that never happened.” That seems to be a theme with The Ideas Man.
Newt is just talking about various theatres that he worked at and was filming in and then had to stop filming because he stopped working there. So while he’s droning on, I can give an update of my own job search. I got a request to come in for a job interview. The town is like an hour from my home. I knew that going in but I like the town and I thought I can relocate if the job is going well.
Then I looked into it more. The place is way out in the sticks. I’d have to take three fucking trains and a bus to get there. Five days a week. Each way. The job was also only for 12 months and then it might not get renewed. So I said fuck this. I’m not doing that. So I declined the interview.
9:45 – Newt is talking about a scene from some other movie that never got released, possibly the scene was never even filmed, involving sexy prostitutes in their underwear having a pillow fight in the popular “Jell-o” style of cinematography. Who doesn’t like Jell-o?
“There’s a lot of hit to the chest, hit to the butt, and all of that kind of stuff.”
You’re a true visionary, Ideas Man. Who could have possibly come up with that? Hitting them in the breasts, you say? Hmm. Interesting. If you’re running low on ideas, can I suggest the pussy?
10:15 – “She was huge, helpful to me because she also dealt with the internet coming for her because of some dumb shit that people did.”
Oh? Did she plagiarise 20 episodes of Monster Madness too? Is that the kind of “dumb shit” that you’re talking about? Dumb shit that YOU did, Mr No Fucking Ideas Man?
What a fucking piece of shit. He takes no responsibility for ANYTHING. Why did I get fired? Why does nobody talk to me any more? Why are all of my friends prostitutes?
Because you’re an asshole, Newt. YOU’RE the problem. Don’t you get it?
10:30 – Newt is thrilled that Tim Ritter was supposed to edit this movie that never got released. THE Tim Ritter. Distant cousin of…god, who’s that guy who played Jack Tripper? John Ritter. That’s it. So who’s Tim Ritter?
Well, he’s not noteworthy enough for Wikipedia.
https://www.timritter.com/bio.html
There’s his information from his own website that appears to originally have been designed in GeoCities. It screams delusion. A guy making shitty “movies”, that nobody watches, that probably don’t even get released, in his mother’s basement. “He was still in high school when he scripted, directed, and produced his first feature film.” Uh huh. Real James Rolfe levels of delusion.
Newt was excited that THIS guy was editing his movie that never got released. This total nobody. This delusional loser.
Why don’t these people aspire to do something good? James Rolfe, Newt, Tony, Justin Silverman, whatever, these delusional losers all seem to find each other. “I want to make a piece of shit!” And then they don’t even fucking make it. They can’t even make a piece of shit.
I had a couple of people contact me to appear in different movies. They wanted me to rent some equipment to them and then they asked if I wanted to be in the movie. Fuck no. I’m not getting involved in this bullshit. And these were professional productions for Netflix and BBC or something. I rented the equipment, though. That was an easy £200.
How desperate does somebody have to be to agree to appear in a NEWT WALLEN production? NOTHING he does ever gets released. And it’s all shit anyway.
12:00 – Newt is talking about “making his art”. Eugh.
“It’s going to live beyond me.”
Yeah. Like nuclear waste. This is shit, Newt. Everything you do is shit. Stop this nonsense. You have no talent whatsoever for any of this. Pretending that you’re making bad movies on purpose isn’t fooling anyone. You CAN’T make a good movie. You can’t even make a bad movie. You can’t make ANY movie. Nothing ever gets released.
12:45 – “Getting involved with Shark Exorcist 2, there were people who I used to associate with who were like, ‘Aren’t you embarrassed? Why wouldn’t you want to make good stuff?’”
Exactly. Newt has told this story before. Ryan Schott told Newt that all of his ideas are shit and that she shouldn’t bother with them. Ryan was 100% right.
“It is good stuff. Eye of the beholder.”
Who is the person saying that Swamp Zombies 2 is anything other than pure, unadulterated dog shit? You’re delusional, Newt. This is all trash. Everything you do is garbage.
13:45 – It just dawned on me. Newt has all of these framed posters in his living room. Every inch of every wall. Is he just not going to get his rental deposit back or what? Maybe he’s using those 3M wall strips.
But that’s got to be…each poster probably requires $5 worth of those strips. And I think they’re just velcro, so how well are they staying on the wall? But $5 times…well, I’m seeing 10 posters just from this shot. That’s $50. He must be spending hundreds of dollars just on these shitty wall strips. This guy who talks about not having money to pay for healthcare is spending hundreds of dollars on adhesive.
14:15 – “It sucks that nobody is going to see the original opening because I was really proud of that one.”
He’s talking about the scene involving Horseface’s ass.
17:15 – Newt is talking about how XXX-Mas was a very Jell-o-esque movies. Yeah. That thing. That thing with that crackhead and that old whore. Well, two old whores. It really reminds me of Jell-o.
I used to eat Jell-o with a straw as a kid. Anyone try that? It was a real culinary experience.
20:30 – Newt is talking about how he writes all of his characters to sound like him (i.e. shitty, unfunny puns). He goes on to say, “You know, Newt, if you wrote it more to sound like James and less to sound like you, you still would have a job at Cinemassacre.”
But he didn’t write those scripts to sound like him. He just copied wholesale from existing reviews. So that makes no fucking sense.
Okay, I’m calling a halt at 25:00. He’s going nowhere. Not just in this video but in life.
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PVC Bondage Guy is Cosplaying as Bastion Booger
Newt says that he’s been working his three jobs.
I recently had somebody call about a part-time job that I applied for. They seemed to suggest that it might be possible for me to do this job in conjunction with my current job. I only work like 15 hours a week so if I do this part-time job, it would perhaps equal one full-time job. So…I don’t know. It would be more money, I guess. But it’s been many years since I’ve worked full time. And I always quit after three months. It’s too much.
1:15 – Newt mentions that PVC Bondage Guy will be here later for at least the fifth time. Five times in 75 seconds. He’s convinced that unless there’s a prostitute sitting next to him, nobody’s going to watch.
And I skimmed ahead just to see if she does appear. The outfit in the little thumbnail seemed…shockingly bad. Let me check this out.
1:47:45 – Just look at this. Recently, I commented that PVC Bondage Guy is going for the physique of Mike Shaw. She seems to really have taken this to heart because now she’s wearing The Bastion Booger’s ring gear, complete with giant fucking gut sticking out. It’s unbelievable. Does she possibly think that this looks attractive?
I have to do a side by side.
I did not edit this picture. She’s clearly wearing Bastion Booger-inspired ring gear and showing off her large gut. This is not attractive. She must know this. If she’s doing it just as a joke, I guess that it’s pretty funny but I’m not sure if she is doing it as a joke.
Let me look at the comments. Can the horntards POSSIBLY find this attractive?
1:49:30 – PVC Bondage Guy said that she got this outfit while watching Bash at the Beach 96. No. Mike Shaw wasn’t in WCW at that time. And he was never in WCW as Bastion Booger.
Did Bastion Booger ever make a Pay Per View appearance? I was really into the character but he was only around for a short while.
His only Pay Per View was 1993’s Survivor Series where he teamed up with Bam Bam Bigelow and The Headshrinkers versus Men on a Mission and the Bushwackers in a losing effort.
Well, what other big men’s ring gear could PVC Bondage Guy emulate? We want something that covers everything, obviously. Bam Bam Bigelow, I guess. The fat guy from Men on a Mission. He had those purple parachute pants. He was also Viscera. She could do something with that. The goth look.
Who else do we have? Earthquake. Tugboat. Andre the Giant. They all pretty much wore normal shit. And singlets. That’s the key when you’re a fat wrestler. Even as a guy. You need to cover up. Nobody wants to see that shit. Bastion Booger’s outfit was revealing to show how unappealing he looked.
What about Giant Gonzalez? He wasn’t particularly fat but I’m suggesting that PVC Bondage Guy can get an outfit with a sexy lady’s body on it. A picture would help.
So there’s his outfit. It was a full body suit with a muscular guy’s body on it. Like those t-shirts that have a suit on them.
Giant Gonzalez didn’t have a great physique so he wore this body suit. It fooled nobody and was one of the most puzzling ring attires of all time. I’m saying that PVC Bondage Guy can do the same thing. She’s a fat chick but she could wear something with a hot chick’s body on it. Hairy ass and pussy or not, you’re choice.
Do they sell something like this? Let me look this up. I don’t even know what search terms to use.
Well, I’m seeing female muscle suits but it’s just like actual muscles, like a creepy Halloween outfit. I’m looking for something where it’s like a sexy lady in a bikini. I don’t know. She might have to get this custom made.
By the way, the horntards are complimenting this HORRIBLE outfit.
1:52:45 – Newt shows some gift that a horntard gave him. A Rocky belt. It might have been $20.
Newt says that he’s going to take nude photos in it for OnlyFans. Well, Joe from Game Sack will look forward to that.
This horntard also gave PVC Bondage Guy a signed Al Snow figure and a WWF belt.
1:57:00 – Newt tells a story about a “rich white kid” who came to his comic book store and threw a fit over a “Stone Cold belt” (Smoking Skull belt). Newt is all about dissing the white folk.
When are we going to get a black prostitute co-host for any of this shit? Newt is all talk, no action.
I can’t watch this any more. I’m skipping ahead.
PVC Bondage Guy is eating from Domino’s again.
2:46:15 – “I broke the woman I’m working with today. She’s Trinidadian. She’s in her mid-50s. She’s an older lady. I think her accent’s hillarious. I’m the only white guy who works there. The other kid they’re training is like 20 something. He’s this white kid who came in. They were role playing how to set up things. So they were all sitting behind me. Then the new kid comes in, he’s a white kid (edit: YOU ALREADY SAID THIS, ASSHOLE) and he’s like, “Oh (something)”. And I’m like, “Oh, I’m sorry, we don’t rent to white.”
Uh huh. Get it? No, I don’t think that anybody does.
God, imagine working with this asshole. He thinks he’s down with the black folk. He’s down with nothing. He talks about how hilarious that woman’s accent is. What a fucking penis. And then he makes this entirely pointless half-joke about white people.
Newt…you’re a fucking piece of shit and you couldn’t be funny to save your life.
I have never laughed at anything that Newt said. Not once. But he thinks that he’s some kind of fucking comedian. These lame fucking tits and gore puns that nobody on earth finds funny.
And if he’s so down with the homeys, where the fuck are they?
I’m not down with the homeys. I’m not down with any of that shit. Nevertheless, virtually all of my girlfriends have been black or Asian. When I was in the US, they were Mexican.
Women don’t want some fucking weirdo pretending to be black or Asian or Mexican. They want a guy who’s confident in himself, unashamed, knows what he likes, knows what he doesn’t like. And if one of the things that you don’t like is, for example, black folk, they’re into that. It’s not a dealbreaker by any means. If you’re willing to go out with them, they don’t give a fuck if you’re a Nazi. If anything, it’s a turn on.
I’d go out with these Chinese women and they were always brainwashed. They always had to tell you how great China is, everything is fabulous in China, it’s the world’s greatest country. I’d tell them straight up that I don’t give a fuck about China. I’m not living there. You’re not living there. Fuck China. Let’s talk about something interesting.
They couldn’t get enough of that. So refreshing to find a guy who isn’t kowtowing to China in a desperate attempt to get some terrible pussy.
If a black woman wants to go out with a black man, she’ll date a black man. She’s not going to date a white man who pretends to be black. That’s fucking weirdo shit.
You see it a lot with guys who are really into Asian shit. The guys who tend to date Asian women are really into anime and hentai and they want to find a stereotypical submissive Asian woman and their Tinder profile has them wearing a kimono and shit. Asian women hate that shit. They don’t want to be fetishised by some fucking weirdo who doesn’t realize that he’s white.
So you tell them straight up, fuck the entire Asian continent. They can’t get enough of it. Instant panty dropper.
Muslims. I can’t stand them. They love it.
I’m not saying be a dick to people. I treat everybody with respect and dignity. But I have likes and dislikes. I have opinions. My views might be different than yours and that’s alright. Doesn’t mean we can’t go out. Women are all about that. They don’t want some weird pussy who’s pretending to be something that he’s not.
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I finished Trails in the Sky Third Chapter | REVIEW – Pelvic Gaming
0:00 – Jump scare.
Reminder: She thinks that this is sexy. She thinks that we’re jerking off.
0:15 – She thanks Rikuson1 for “gifting” the game to her. Why do these horntards do this? Why do these women accept the games? If you want a game and don’t want to pay for it, go to a torrent site. What’s the big deal?
These are probably console games. I don’t know how easy it is to pirate stuff on modern consoles.
So who’s Rikuson1?
A black anime hillbilly nerd in his mid 30s with no girlfriend. She’s accepting gifts from THIS guy. This guy who clearly has mental health problems.
I think that this is him. That’s a Georgia accent? Maybe he’s gay and the gay accent is just throwing me off.
Back to the super hot Pelvic Gamer.
This is boring as fuck. She’s just reviewing the game. I’m going to make a sandwich. Keep my strength up.
I put a couple of Lorne sausages in my George Foreman Grill that I must have bought nearly 20 years ago. Still works great.
Lorne sausages are a square sausage with no casing. They’re a Scottish thing. When you order a sausage roll at a cafe, they’ll ask if you want square or link sausage. I bought a box of 10 of them for £4, which seems pretty cheap. But now I have to hurry up and eat them because I don’t want to bother freezing them.
It’s a rare opportunity to be able to live in Scotland. How many people have done it? Even people in England would welcome the opportunity to live in Scotland but they don’t do it. So I should take full advantage of the culinary delights on offer.
I only had haggis once. But they sell it and people eat it. It’s not some tourist thing. I was at work and they were making haggis in the canteen and some guy said, “That haggis smells delicious” and then regaled us with his childhood memories of eating haggis.
They sell it in the store either canned (which must be god awful) or refrigerated in tubes. Like how you would buy a roll of Jimmy Dean sausage, for example. I don’t think that they sell Jimmy Dean sausage any more. Some multinational corporation bought old Jimmy Dean out. Plus, I think he died years ago.
They also sell it in refrigerated pouches.
I had it once. I bought the tube. The taste is actually fine. There’s a strong pepper taste. Like salt and pepper. But the consistency…there are little grisly bits in it that reminded me of eating maggots. This must be the various internal organs that they put in there. You guys like eating various internal organs, right?
If it weren’t for the consistency, I could see eating it. It was fine. But…maybe take out the heart, lungs, stomach, and whatever the fuck else you’re putting in there.
They also sell haggis in restaurants. Just anywhere, from a takeaway to fine dining. I’m never brave enough to try it again.
What else? Oh, pizza crunch. This is a cheap pizza that you get at the grocery store, deep fried and they put vinegar on it. It’s fine, I guess. Kind of bland.
Munchy boxes. This is a pizza box full of shredded lamb, various types of Indian-style chicken, fries onion rings, shit like this. They give a couple of pita breads too. The idea is to assemble your own kebab. Like a downgraded gyro.
Different restaurants will have different takes on the muchy box. A Chinese place will have a pizza box full of spring rolls and whatever else. It’s just a pizza box full of cheap food to satisfy the nutritional needs of poor families and big fat guys.
5:00 – “What can I say? I’ve got a thing for bad boys.”
Oh, my penis is so hard here.
I’m turning this off. I made it to the eight minute mark. She’s going into excuciating nerdy detail about the combat system of this game that I have absolutely no interest in.
Oh, she’s in Japan. And if you want to give her money and/or games while she’s living it up in Japan, you can do that.
This is somebody who lost their job, by the way. They’re unemployed and going on expensive vacations. And they want you to give them money and games. The entitlement of it all. Shaking down literal retards for money.
Here she is with…I don’t even know. Her lesbian girlfriend, I guess. In Japan.
Here she is eating tiny Japanese cakes for her birthday. Birthday cakes are smaller and more efficient in Japan.
Here she is eating at a wackily-named Japanese restaurant. Reggae Hairstyle Rockstar, am I right?
Oh, it’s not even a Japanese company. It’s an American company. So she went to Japan to eat at America Town.
She went clubbing and got some STD.
While in Japan, she still found time to locate a Youtube comment that she doesn’t like and call the guy out for it. And his comment wasn’t even offensive. Calm down, you fucking cretin. People have different opinions.
Everybody in the comments: “Boo! We hate that guy for expressing an opinion. Please have sex with me.”
Still in Japan, she decided to watch…Heathers. That most Japanese of plays.
By the way, she apparently speaks some Japanese. She’s been learning for years, I believe. And she seems to be doing NOTHING Japanese while she’s in Japan.
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No More Castzilla vs The Podmonster – Tony from Hack the Movies
I don’t know the reason. Nor does Tony, apparently.
There was no copyrighted material, as far as I can recall. In the old school version of the podcast, it was audio only and they didn’t play clips or anything of the movies. In the UNWATCHABLE reboot, it was live and I think it was just an excuse to shake pennies out of the horntards’ pockets for “super chats”.
The problem with the podcast was that Johanna had negative charisma. Tony would tell an obvious joke and she wouldn’t seem to get it so in response she would just be loud and claim to be gay. I mean…this isn’t how conversations work.
I’m looking at Johanna’s Twitter. It’s all Star Wars, Godzilla, and Disney. Well, at least she’s not promoting her Dollar Tree OnlyFans like Horseface does.
Is Johanna still on that OnlyFans thing? God, let’s hope not.
Well, the site still exists but I can’t tell when she last active. Oh, “Last seen today.” Eugh.
There should be some sort of Pornography Licencing Board. If you want to make porn, you have to first prove that you’re of reasonable attractiveness. Why not? Pornography is a serious issue. Let’s crack down on this shit. I only want to see hot chicks on porn sites.
If I was running for public office, this would be my main platform. I’d win in a landslide. People are sick of this shit where anybody can make porn no matter how overweight, unattractive, or mentally ill they may be. Let’s limit pornography to women of sound mind who take this shit seriously and have a physique worth looking at.
You wouldn’t let just anybody be a doctor or a teacher or even a taxi driver. Why do we let anybody make pornography? Let’s establish a licencing system.
“Well, some people like fat chicks.” No. It’s a myth. Show me the person jerking off to fat chicks. It doesn’t exist.
It’s not about discrimination, it’s about only allowing people are suitable for the job to do the job. You can be any race but you have to be a hot chick. What’s so controversial about this? Pornography is a visual medium.
“What about MILFs?” Milfs are allowed PROVIDED that it’s a mother that somebody would reasonably WANT to fuck. So not just some old crackhead. Same rules apply, though. Has to be in shape. Has to be reasonably attractive. If she has big tits, we can overlook some stuff. Butterfaces are allowed, within reason.
But Johanna from Hack the Movies? Absolutely not. Her Fansly is basically conning retards. Because who else would subscribe? There’s no nudity on there and it’s this 300 pound woman. Who, other than a retard, would possibly give their money to this? I’m opposed to conning retards, and I think that my pornography licence would go some way to addressing this problem. It would insure that everybody, retard and non-retard alike, is guaranteed that whoever they’re subscribing to, will be a hot chick.
Why stop at pornography? Why not a licence to start a podcast? There are so many awful podcasts out there, Castzilla vs the Podmonster being one of them, that it’s time to clean this shit up. Only podcasts of a certain standard should be allowed.
This means that the Zap Cristal Podcast is gone, Point & Drink Adventure is out, Hack the Movies is out, whatever the fuck Newt does is gone. We only want good podcasts.
You can apply this to loads of shit. Let’s get rid of shitty Youtube channels. Why not? Yes, a lot of people would be out of work but they probably weren’t making much money to begin with and by getting rid of the shit, we’ll only have good stuff to watch. It would be a golden age for Youtube. Every single thing you watch on Youtube is going to be good. No longer will you click on a video and say, “Well, that sucked dick.” Think of how much time you’ve wasted on shitty Youtube videos. That would be a thing of the past.
People still have preferences, of course, but some stuff is objectively bad and has no audience. Zap Cristal’s channel, for example. Or Retro Ali’s channel. Or Erin Plays. Get rid of this shit. It has no value.
You hear about the internet “democratising” entertainment. In the old days, the television and movie production companies acted as a gatekeeper to who would be on tv and films and who wouldn’t.
Let’s go back to that. Maybe not put Jews in charge this time but let’s have a system where if you want to make porn or Youtube videos or a podcast or whatever, you have to first demonstrate that you’re suitable for the role. It’s just common sense.
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Popeye the Sailor Man – NES, Arcade, Famicom Video Game Review & History! – Irate Gamer
He starts by begging you to go to his Patreon. To entice you, he promises videos of NES porn games. “Too hot for Youtube!”
What? We’re supposed to be jerking off to Chris BORES now? It’s a hard pass from me.
0:15 – “Ah yes, the world of Pupeye.”
Get used to this. He can’t pronounce “Popeye”. It’s going to make for very uncomfortable viewing for a video about Popeye.
Popeye has nephews named Papeye, Pepeye, Pipeye, and Pupeye, I believe. Do you suppose he pronounces “Pupeye” as “Popeye”?
0:30 – He says that Pupeye is one of the first NES games that he had and played it “Pretty much since I puked.” Whatever that means.
He sings the “I’m Popeye the Sailor Man, I live in a garbage can” song. But only that much. He says that he heard the song in the first grade.
That’s probably my experience as well. But what’s the next set of lyrics? Because my understanding is it continues, “I poop in my pants like Veronica Gants”, which can’t possibly be right. I think that I just made it up, as a kid. I don’t even know who Veronica Gants is. I think it’s some Judy Blume character.
I’m not seeing it but there is a Veronica Ganz young adult book.
https://www.amazon.com/Veronica-Puffin-Novel-Marilyn-Sachs/dp/0140370781
But that was published in 1995. There’s no way that I was making up lyrics to this song in high school.
There’s no Veronica Gants or Veronica Gantz. And I don’t think Judy Blume wrote for any character called Veronica.
So I don’t know. I just totally made it up then. What are the actual lyrics then?
“I turned up the heater And blew up my wiener” seems to be a popular one. There is no way that I heard that. It definitely involved pooping in your pants.
I don’t know. It’s perhaps unimportant in the grand scheme of things.
I went to a playground once with my friend and there were some rowdy girls who we knew from school riding some like four-way see saw type thing and singing a song about Ronald McDonald beating his balls with a monkey wrench. The wrench got hot and his balls fell off. At least, that’s how I remember it. But we were kind of intimidated by these girls and their aggressive song so even though we knew them, we just left the park.
How old must we have been? Fifth grade? Sixth grade?
What other schoolyard classics? Oh, the diarrhoea song. For some reason, I think that they stole it from Stand By Me, a movie which I don’t think that I’ve seen. This one I remember distinctly because it had a baseball theme.
“When you’re sliding into first and your pants begin to burst/When you’re sliding into second and you can’t wait another second/When you’re sliding into third and you feel a little turd/When you”re sliding into home and your pants begin to foam.”
Now, obviously, the “second” rhyming with “second” is the weakest one but the foaming pants is a close second. If you’re excreting foaming stuff, maybe see a doctor.
Here’s something that was definitely stolen from Stand By Me from the unimaginative retards from my school. Saying “boom bada boom” in reference to fat kids.
Why can’t people make up their own shit? It’s so fucking pathetic to steal shit from movies. You should be embrarassed. Even 40 years later, you should be embarrassed.
Anyway, back to fucking Chris BORES. I’m surprised that he’s even able to release videos given that his computers are all haunted.
2:00 – Chris BORES refers to a singing Olive Oyl as “Taylor Swift.” Oh, what a timely reference that is.
3:45 – Shout out to the Pupeye movie. What a piece of shit that was. I saw it in school. One of the few movies I remember seeing in school. I’m sure that we saw plenty but this was so bad that it was memorable. We saw it in some health class or something. I remember the teacher. It was a fairly young woman. “Here’s what the young people like…that awful Popeye movie starring Robin Williams.”
6:45 – The video ends with some bizarre song over the credits. “Butterfly in the sky/I can go twice as high” and all the while, you see, “Written by Chris Bores, Directed by Chris Bores, Starring Chris Bores, Help by Chris Bores” and so on. What the fuck is this?
Oh. Reading Rainbow. That PBS show for children that I was WAY too old to watch. I was probably in my 20s when it was on. But Chris BORES, who I think is my age, was watching this?
Then at the very end he shills for Patreon again. Chris, I’m not giving you any fucking money so that you can blow it on ghost prostitutes. Fuck off.
When was Reading Rainbow actually on? Maybe I’m way off.
1983 to 2006. I definitely never watched it.
So that’s Pupeye for the NES. At least there weren’t any poop or homosexual references this time around. He’ll never top “boner biting dogs” for a pure insight into his fantasies.
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Radical Reggie re-tweets Darius Truxton hit piece by Smash JT
(Note: This started off as a simple article about some boring Radical Reggie video but it took a turn.)
0:00 – Ooh. Baby got back. This is how he starts the video? Well, sex sells, I guess.
Apparently, the audio didn’t record so he’s just going to play some kick ass tunes while he shows us this nerd convention. I’m hoping for lots more shots of dudes bending over.
5:00 – He’s replaying footage that she showed in the beginning of the video. Unfortunately, it wasn’t footage of that guy bending over.
God, I’m bored out of my mind. How much more is there? What? This video is 22 minutes? I’m not even a third of the way in. Is it just going to be this for the next 15 minutes? This muzak playing while he films videos games for sale?
9:15 – Again, he’s reusing footage. I don’t know if he doesn’t realise this or he’s trying to pad this out or what.
14:45 – More recycled footage.
Then there’s immediately DIFFERENT recycled footage. Recycled footage of stuff that we saw like less than a minute ago.
Reggie, I’m calling a halt to the video. I’ve given you nearly 15 minutes of my time for THIS. If you lost the audio, either record something new or don’t release the video. Because this is trash.
Radical Reggie re-tweeted a hit piece on Darius Truxton. What a buffoon Radical Reggie must be.
Let me see if I can find this video. It’s from Smash JT, apparently, somebody who Darius Truxton regularly made videos about so I don’t think that we can expect an unbiased account.
2:45 – Smash JT is upset at Darius Truxton’s video where he proposed to Ircha Gaming using Amibos. Which was CLEARLY a joke. Is this the best that he has?
3:45 – He shows footage of this proposal video and Darius Truxton has a list of 50 reasons why Ircha should marry him. It’s a reference to former “Youtuber” Wrestling Jesus. Even if you don’t get the references, it’s clearly a joke. Nobody expects a marriage out of this.
4:30 – Then Smash JT shows footage of Darius Truxton complaining about some ZZZ-list “Youtuber” selling his art even though he lacks talent. Darius Truxton is clearly right. But Smash JT puts a message on screen saying that this “artist” Youtuber is talented and Darius Truxton is not.
Are we going to ever get to something worthwhile? The video started with some woman talking about being stalked and sent penis pictures or something. But she never said it was Darius Truxton. Can we get to the alleged stalking?
There’s her video. I couldn’t listen to Smash JT waffle on any more. I made it to the five minute mark. This woman is clearly a lunatic. Even if the person she’s talking about is Darius Truxton, which we don’t know if it is, because she just gives a first name, and I don’t know his name anyway, the story goes NOWHERE.
THIS woman thinks she’s being stalked? She’s out of her mind. If Darius Truxton is stalking this woman, which I don’t accept, he needs up raise his standards.
She’s talking about getting pictures of his penis and whatnot for 14 years. Did you consider blocking him at any point?
This woman is a complete cretin. She thinks that she’s a hot chick, an affliction that seems to be rampant in the online retro gaming “community”. Smash JT is a closeted homosexual, as Darius Truxton has pointed out many times. And Smash JT’s video is clearly just a hit piece full of lies. You might be able to fool retards like Radical Reggie with this shit but not me.
At 11:00 in Smash JT’s video, he FINALLY gives the citation to where she claims that it’s Darius Truxton. And she’s nuts. She keeps talking about “beefy content” and the word “beef” appears constantly. It’s her screen name. This is 40 year old woman.
So I watched the video now. All it seems to be is somebody sending this woman pictures of his penis. She went to the police and the police said, “There’s no crime here. Just block him.” Indeed.
This is a crazy cat lady who thinks that she’s a hot chick. Smash JT is a homosexual who Darius Truxton has made numerous videos about in regards to his shitty videos. So Smash JT is using this crazy woman to try to get back at Darius Truxton for making all of those videos about him about how he’s gay and his videos are shit. But…Smash JT IS gay and his videos ARE shit.
Darius Truxton is an odd fellow. I’m not saying otherwise. But he’s no more a lunatic than anyone else involved in this story.
There’s a simple solution here. If Darius Truxton is sending this woman picture of his penis, which, again, I don’t accept, then he should stop that. Instead, send pictures of your penis to Joe from Game Sack. He seems to like that.
Actually, now that I think about it, Newt Wallen showed his penis to Joe from Game Sack AND 8 Bit Eric. 8 Bit Eric was like the number one guy who Darius Truxton talked about. So send pictures of your penis to him. 8 Bit Eric is also the guy who recently talked about “touching tips” and “gay chicken”. 8 Bit Eric is CLEARLY a homosexual.
So simple solution. Send pictures of your penis to 8 Bit Eric. Darius Truxton gets the thrill of showing his penis and 8 Bit Eric gets the thrill of seeing his penis. Everybody wins.
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Tales of Kenzera: ZAU is a good game… but not a good Metroidvania – Cannot be Tamed
Melons out. Choker. She’s going all out today. She really wants that 100,000 subscribers.
2:15 – I don’t even know what she’s saying. I’ve already tuned out. It’s some game about African tribal characters and…they’re dealing with death and..their feelings…and capitalising on the woke movement.
Not for me, Pamela.
3:15 – She says “bin” as in “garbage” or “trash”. Is this what people say in Canada? Or is this a British term that only seeped into the broader Anglophone lexicon due to the internet.
“Recycle bin” on your computer. It’s called the same thing in the US, right? It used to be called “trash”. Then they wanted to make it more politically correct so they changed it to “recycle bin”.
Was the icon called “trash” in the UK too? I have to assume so. They’re not renaming it to “rubbish” for the UK market, surely.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Trash_(computing)
Oh, my god, they did rename it. At least for MacOS (whatever that is).
With macOS Mojave, the Trash was renamed “Bin” in the Australian English localisation, and with macOS Catalina, “Bin” also appeared in the UK localisation
Windows 95 was the change from “trash” to “recycle bin”. That sounds about right.
4:45 – I’m losing the will to live and I’m only halfway through this. She’s a total bore.
6:30 – “The game’s soundtrack is incredible: a mix of African traditional music, synths, and electronics. It’s one I would listen to in or outside of the game.”
Uh huh. What’s your favourite African traditional song, Pam?
She ends the video by telling you to go to her Patreon. No thanks, Pam.
Well, actually, let’s check it out. Now I’m intrigued.
275 members. £197/month. How does that work? People are giving less than £1 a month?
Yeah, I guess so. There are only two tiers. One is £1, the other is £4.50. In the US and Canada, it’s presumably $1 and $5. As per usual, prices get jacked up in the UK.
She offers nothing extra for the higher tier. And there’s basically nothing in the lower tier. You can vote on polls. Whoopdeedoo. I mean, I like polls and all but I’m not paying £1/month for that.
African tribal music. Come on. Who’s rocking out to that shit?
My lady friend seems to know a lot about music but it’s not something that we talk about much. But you can mention a singer or band or song or something and she’ll know it.
Even old shit. There’s some corny as fuck shit that they play on New Years Eve on the BBC. They get some old time singers to sing their biggest hits. It’s to appeal to the elderly, who are sitting at home and watching this shit. I’m listening to this shit and saying, “Who would possibly know any of these people” but she knows the names of the songs and who these people are.
Another time, we were watching some game show, I don’t remember, Pointless or something. And one of the answers was Rosa Parks. There was something about Rosa Parks. And I thought, “That’s a ridiculously easy question.” But she didn’t know it. Instead, she knew some stupid question about S Club 7 or something.
So I start mocking her lack of knowledge about civil rights in relation to her wealth of knowledge about shitty pop music. I’m telling her that she should be embarrassed that she knows S Club 7’s obscure releases but not Rosa Parks. She says, “I knew but Rosa Parks is an American thing. She’s not so well-known here.”
It’s much like Erin. She’s a total fucking dope. Well, I’m not saying that my ladyfriend is a total dope but this is how a lot of people are. They’re interested in stupid trivial bullshit like Britney Spears and Weezer at the expense of of more substantial things.
We were in Pizza Hut and every song being played was from a black band. So I said this is completely bizarre. Everybody in here is white, the city is overwhelmingly white, why is this the playlist? She said, “This isn’t a black band this is (whatever).” She gave the name of the band, I don’t remember, but one of the members is black and the rest are white. So I said, “Okay, whatever, but this seems a very peculiar playlist to me given the clientele.” She said, “Good music is good music.”
Another time, many years ago, I was telling her about a co-worker of mine who was a fat white woman. And whenever this woman talked about music, it would be hip hop or the like. So I said that it’s obvious that this woman is taking advantage of the black guys who like fat white women situation. She made a face and this is when I was still trying to impress her so I backtracked and said, “Maybe she just likes the music, I guess.” She said, “Yeah, just because she likes that type of music doesn’t mean that she likes that type of man.” But of course I was right.
Where was I going with this? Oh yeah, Pam and her bondage gear and tits and whatnot. I don’t know. How is she going to get that 100,000 subscribers? I think that my nude reviews on OnlyFans idea was a bad one. Because that fat hillbilly who pimps out MintSalad stole this idea from me and it doesn’t seem to be working for him.
https://www.youtube.com/@ASEPresents/videos
Oh, I see that she’s watching Star Trek now and other nerd shows. Like that Galifrey Girls that I…eugh…have attempted to watch a few times.
It’s so insulting. These women are obviously not interested in Star Trek and this nerd shit but they’re intentionally choosing to make videos about it to pull in horny nerds. Can it possibly work? They’re nerds, not retards. They can see when something isn’t genuine.
I enjoyed Star Trek and science fiction and nerd shit in my adolescence. I can not imagine finding any erotic inspiration from some woman pretending to like that shit. It’s totally beyond my comprehension. Does this exist? Are there men out there stupid enough to find this erotic?
According to Mint Salad’s views numbers, no. Not really.
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KINGDOM OF THE PLANET OF THE APES Review – Newt Wallen
Alright, Ideas Man. Let’s hear what you’ve got. Apes. A whole planet of them. A planet where apes evolved from men.
Is that even right? I know that the Charlton Heston character said that in the first movie but he was just speculating. He didn’t even know that he was earth.
In Battle for the Planet of the Apes (I think) it’s revealed that there was an epidemic that killed dogs and cats so…apes became pets. I guess that fish, rabbits, hamsters, ferrets, lizards, turtles, et cetera weren’t considered suitable. It was apes. And then these apes became slaves and did all kinds of shit. Couriers and hairstylists and shit. There were big training houses. And then these apes rebelled, with a super-intelligent ape (from the future or at least his parents were from the future) leading the revolt.
When did the apes go from looking like apes to looking like men in ape suits? That part is never explained. Because there’s definitely a scene with a real gorilla or at least a man in a suit that looks like a real gorilla. And I’m sure that there’s a scene with a real chimpanzee as well.
Anyway, speaking of simian-level intelligence, we have Newt Wallen.
0:00 – “I have no slept in over 24 hours.”
And he’s in his car. What an asshole. He loves putting the general public in danger over his own stupidity.
“If you watched the Coin Slots video…”
Which I didn’t and won’t.
He’s talking about his jobs.
I went to a job interview recently. It didn’t go well. Very strange interview. They just asked totally generic questions that they clearly asked everybody. And they didn’t ask a single thing about my work experience. It’s bizarre. I’ve never seen anything like it.
So I didn’t get the job. But I’m going to keep at it.
Maybe I should say that I’m autistic so that I can get some preferential treatment. Get the questions in advance or something. Do you have to provide proof of a diagnosis? Would this be a completely insane idea?
Because the interviews always go poorly, which makes it difficult to get a job, but once I get a job, people are always thrilled with my work. There’s never been anybody who said, “This guy sucks cock. We don’t want him.” To the contrary. When I inevitably say, “This job sucks cock, I don’t want it” they beg me to stay. “You’re the only one doing any work around here. Can you reconsider?” And my professionalism is beyond reproach.
Newt is wearing a sweater, by the way. Not even a sweater like a pullover sweater, which would be gay enough. This is a button up sweater. A cardigan, if you will. Like Mr Rogers might wear. What the fuck is this?
But, I noticed that he’s not wearing his bracelet. He didn’t want to go overboard with the homosexuality.
4:45 – Some kind of whore walks past giving a Nazi salute. Newt gets distracted.
Oh, and then Newt starts talking about his “ex”. You know, that woman who died of cancer who Newt enjoyed fucking up the ass. He’s upgraded her to “ex”. She used to be a “friend.”
14:00 – Newt is still droning on.
He was talking about the other movies in the series. And even mentioned the cartoon and the tv series.
I’m surprised that he didn’t mention Play-Mate of the Apes and/or Planet of the Babes. This guy presents himself as a Planet of the Apes enthusiast?
17:45 – “There were times that made me get emotional.”
Wait…what? From an ape movie? Newt’s an emotional guy.
“Maybe that’s just me. Maybe I’m a fucking weirdo who gets emotional about talking monkey movies.”
Well…I wasn’t going to say it but…yes.
20:45 – Newt is working three jobs. Doing inventory in a retail establishment is one of them. Whatever that entails.
That’s the video.
What about Time of the Apes? I know it’s not official but I remember really being into it. I don’t know if I was watching the actual movie Time of the Apes or if I was watching that Japanese tv series that was cobbled together to create Time of the Apes. But this was in the late 1980s. I was a kid. It was on Nickelodeon. And I distinctly remember a scene where somebody gets trapped on some kind of ice world. And that’s how it ends. I don’t know if that’s in the movie or not. I’m skimming it on Youtube and not seeing such a scene.
Is the Japanese tv series even in English?
According to this, no. So it must have been Time of the Apes that I saw. Plus, I knew that it was called Time of the Apes.
It was also a Mystery Science Theater 3000 episode. I remember they kept making “crap in hand” jokes.
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GEEKOM IT13 w/ Intel i9 – the Only Mini PC You Need – John Riggs
Alright, Riggs, what have you got? Doing a little shilling today?
0:00 – He says that this is a good computer for emulation. Why would I need a separate computer for that? My main computer does that just fine.
0:15 – He says that this little piece of shit can do Wii U emulation. I don’t know anything about Wii U emulation or this device but I’d be astonished if that’s true.
0:45- “This company did send me this for the purposes of this video.”
Well, at least he admits it. It’s not like his bike reviews, which apparently are hidden now, where he pretended that he was suddenly really interested in motorised scooters and bicycles. Because they were being sent to him for free in exchange for a video promoting them.
Whatever happened to his fucking bike channel that he promised us? He should do a channel exclusively for promoting shit. Let’s see how well that does.
“As you’ve seen in my videos, I don’t really review stuff, I just look at stuff.”
But you still get the shit for free. Don’t try to downplay what this is. He’s actually boasting that even though he’s lazy and incompetent, these companies STILL send him shit for free in exchange for a video.
3:15 – It comes with some thing so you can attach it to your wall. I’m trying to think of a reason why somebody would want a computer bolted to their wall. How is this a feature? John Riggs is struggling to come up with an explanation too but he’s desperate to shill for this shit so he’s trying.
4:00 – “I have a decent laptop but it can’t do Steam.”
What? Any laptop made in the last 15 years should be able to run Steam just fine and the available games. Not recent games, of course, but old games. Steam itself, the software, hasn’t been laggy in many, many years. When did it come out?
It was 2003. Yeah, I remember when it came out. I used to play Team Fortress Classic and that used an online service called WON. WON was perfectly fine. No problems. But Valve (the makers of Team Fortress Classic and Steam) wanted people to switch over to Steam. At the time, Steam was…I don’t even know what the problem was. But it was slow as fuck on my computer. So I, like a lot of Team Fortress Classic enthusiasts, resisted the switch to Steam.
Eventually, the switch was forced on everyone as WON was shut down. WON was strictly a platform to play games online whereas Steam is mainly a platform to sell games. But I’m not even sure if that was the case at the time. Nevertheless, this was clearly the motivation to push people on to Steam. They wanted to get people to download their software that sells games.
But it’s been absolute ages since I had any problem running Steam. Even on shitty laptops. So I don’t know what the fuck John Riggs is using. A Hewlett Packard netbook from 2003 perhaps.
4:15 – Default Windows wallpaper. I have the same one. I haven’t cared about my wallpaper in at least 10 years. Nevertheless, if I was making a video, I’d put something kooky on there to give the horntards a little something interesting to look at. Not John Riggs.
He also has the taskbar shit in the middle of the taskbar, as it (inexplicably) is by default. He couldn’t be bothered to spend ten minutes customising this. He’s not going to use this thing. It’s going straight on Ebay after this video.
4:45 – He’s shilling for his JOHN RIGGS controller. Why ANYBODY would want a John Riggs controller is totally beyond me.
And why is he playing Steam on this thing anyway? He spent the entire video talking about how great it is for emulation. Why doesn’t he run an emulator? Play some of those Wii U games that can allegedly be run on this thing.
5:45 – He claims that he uses his computer to stream on Twitch and Youtube. Does he do this? I don’t think he’s streaming on Youtube, certainly. I was unaware that he’s on Twitch but I’m not a real John Riggs enthusiast, I have to say.
But why would you use a shitty, cheap mini PC for that? Surely, your standard, powerhouse PC would be better for that.
6:00 – He says that this mini PC would also be good for demonstrating games at conventions if you’re doing a panel. You know…for all of you who do panels at nerd conventions.
Why wouldn’t you just use a laptop? I mean, you’d still need a fucking monitor. Are you going to lug a monitor with you or just hope that there’s a monitor there and you can hook everything up and it will work? What advantages, if any, does this thing have over a laptop in this situation?
6:30 – “Can you imagine what it would be like if we had these during the days of LAN parties.”
But we didn’t. So what are you suggesting? This thing would be good for time-travelling? “If I ever go back to 1995, I’m bringing this thing with me.”
I think that somebody in 1995 would be more impressed with the sleek laptops that we have today. Also, would a monitor in 1995 have the necessary ports? Didn’t they have those big multi-pin connections? What are they called? Serial ports? Surely, this mini PC doesn’t have a serial port.
So you’d be in 1995, ready to join your LAN party, with a brick. Also, there are USB connections. How are you going to plug your 1995 keyboard into this thing? 1995 keyboards have those circular pin connectors. Same with mice. You’d be totally fucked. You’d be the laughing stock of that LAN party. “You fucking retard. You travelled back in time and brought THIS? This useless piece of shit? Why didn’t you bring one of those sleek laptops that I read about in Omni magazine?
I wonder about the voltate too. Even if you could hook this thing up to a 1995 monitor, would it blow the monitor up? Because I had a tablet that was just a few years old and when I plugged it into a modern computer from just a few years later, it fried.
What would I bring back to 1995? My phone, I guess. Imagine showing the touch screen and the camera and the internet access. Did they have wifi in 1995? Perhaps not. Well, the touch screen and the camera then. The high resolution. It would blow minds.
John Riggs would just be jerking off with his useless mini PC.
So anyway, if you use his promo code you get 5% off. FIVE PER CENT! How much does this thing even cost?
I won’t click his links because I think he gets a penny if I do that.
SIX HUNDRED BRITISH POUNDS! Or 829 Freedom Dollars. What the fuck? I was thinking £100. For that money, why wouldn’t you just get a pretty good laptop or desktop computer?
And on the website, they give you a 5% discount. Do you get another 5% discount if you use John Riggs’ promo code? I doubt it.
And 5% is an insulting discount. I don’t think that I’ve ever seen a 5% discount on ANYTHING. Nobody would advertise a 5% discount. Anything less than 10%, forget it.
Staying on the subject of time travel, imagine going back in time to, say, 1924 with a copy of Juggs magazine from 1995. You’re hanging out with Al Capone and flappers and shit and you show them this copy of Juggs. It would blow their minds. They had magazines in 1924, of course, but it was all print. There weren’t any pictures. And they didn’t have glossy pages. And they didn’t have women with giant fake tits.
People would think that you’re some kind of wizard just by bringing a MAGAZINE back in time.
People talk about bringing a medical kit back in time or a laptop or some kind of modern gun or something. No. I’m bringing a copy of Juggs every time. Doesn’t matter what the year is (as long as it’s pre-1970 or so).
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A Big Fat Channel Update (1 Year of Mad Panic Gaming)
If this is anything less than news that he’s going to start reviewing prostitutes and/or brothels, I’m going to be disappointed.
0:00 – So we see Jim in his apartment with his 8 year old boy haircut. I’ve never seen anything like this. He’s in his mid 30s, I think. I used to think that that he was much older than that. But he has this 8 year old boy haircut. What is wrong with him? It screams, “I’m a creep.” And he is a creep. But why advertise?
He jokes that his apartment isn’t luxurious. Well…maybe don’t spend all of your money on prostitutes and you can get something better.
I’m four minutes in and losing the will to live. He’s saying nothing. He’s just talking about the type of videos that he makes. Who cares?
7:00 – “Shooting videos with Destiny, my little buddy Destiny Fomo. Any time she comes out here…for a vacation, we’ll make time to get together. To go game hunting or, you know, we’ll go hit some arcades or even hit a bar or two, you know. Get up some shenanigans. So I always appreciate that.”
Uh huh. We know what you do. Don’t insult our intelligence. Your “little buddy” (creepy as fuck) is not there for “vacation”. She’s a whore, getting pimped out by TuanX, and you’re a john.
I feel like “john” isn’t used any more. Am I old fashioned? Or is it a regional thing? I think that “trick” is the preferred term nowadays.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Client_(prostitution)
Well, “john” is on there and seems to be given equal status to “trick”.
“In 2018, Pope Francis described clients of prostitution as criminals.”
What a weird comment for a pontiff to make. No shit, they’re criminals. That’s just a legal issue. Can you give an opinion on the morality of it? Surely, people should be more concerned about going to Hell than going to prison.
I’m trying to get through this video and you know what I’m reminded of? Charlie Bucket from the 1970s Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory. Same hair as “Kid” Shoryuken.
I saw an interview with the guy who played Charlie and he said that when he showed his son the movie, his son asked him why he was wearing a wig during the movie. It’s true. It looks like a wig. But that was the the style, I guess. For 8 year old boys, anyway.
He’s been talking about his plan for upcoming videos. Spoiler: it’s nothing interesting. Prostitution isn’t even mentioned in passing.
I’ve got to turn this off. I can’t made it to 11 minutes or something. He’s boring.
Bring on the prostitutes. The Newt Wallen strategy.