https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8eP9pDpJQRI
0:00 – Jesus Christ, can you just take one step away from the camera? Nobody wants to see John Riggs this close up. It’s not even about John Riggs, really. Nobody wants to see ANYBODY this close up.
So he’s going to show a trailer for some video game documentary. Great. I’m all about video game documentaries. I think that I’ve seen one.
0:30 – John Riggs starts talking about how critically acclaimed the director of this piece of shit is.
0:45 – We get to the trailer. Some guy who I’ve never seen before says, “Nostalgia is such an interesting thing to me because so many people place it in different categories.”
Umm…does this make sense to anyone? Maybe in the documentary he elaborates but here we just end it and then we’re on to horny JOHN RIGGS!
So John Riggs defines “nostalgia” thusly: “Nostalgia for me definitely brings me back to when I was younger, when I didn’t ache, before I had responsibilities, before I had a full-time job.”
It’s always so uncomfortable seeing John Riggs. He’s only a little older than I am. I don’t ache. And look at him. Is it possible that I look that old too? It’s a worrying thought.
But does he really have a full time job? I saw something that he works in a radio station. He’s some kind of DJ on what looks like an “urban contemporary” music station. I guess that in Yakama or where ever he lives, he’s the closest thing that you’ll find to a black man so they just went with it.
But can that really be a full time job? Can it be a job at all? I assumed that it was almost a hobby.
And if it is full-time, how is he able to take all of this time off, whenever he pleases, to travel the country going to video game conventions and trying to pick up chicks? And he’s on Twitter and the like ALL THE TIME. Trying to get things going with various gamer grrls.
Plus he has his family responsibilities. But that seems to be WAY down his list of priorities.
1:00 – Another guy I never heard of defines “nostalgia”, “It’s like a microwave. You’re re-heating your leftovers. Nostalgia is the leftovers. You remember it being so good, it was such a great meal, but it’s never going to be as good as it was when you first had the meal.”
Wow. This guy really loves leftovers. I don’t know. Maybe don’t use the microwave. Maybe reheat stuff in the oven. Or in a pan. Depends on what you’re re-heating. There are various tricks.
Like french fries, for example. Those are never good microwaved. I just put them on my George Foreman griddle section and that works pretty well but you can also put them in a frying pan, add a little oil, heat them up and they’re as good or better than on the day you purchased them.
So try it out, get back to me with the results, and maybe try to find some meaning in your life. These Z-list “Youtubers” talking about *nostalgia* are fucking pathetic.
1:15 – Some other nobody says, “Back then, I put tonnes of time, tonnes of energy, tonnes of love into getting a box, opening it, smelling it, feeling it, reading these guides, these books.”
This loser never smelled or felt a box in his life.
But innuendo aside, has anybody ever smelled a video game box? Who the fuck is doing this? Does this resonate with anybody? This is a crazy person.
And he’s all covered with tattoos. You see footage of his tatted up hands as he’s flipping through the pages of some 30 year old manual. This guy has clearly made a series of poor life choices.
1:45 – The parade of tatted up old junkies continues. “The reason I wanted to go back and play these old games and collect them is that I had a deeper connection with them, I had more intimate experiences playing with them, I thought that they were just more well-made games, like core gameplay. You start to connect certain games with certain people you played them with back in the day, like your friend down the block.”
And there was footage of this meth addict with his pit bull earlier in the video. Where did they find these people? And what do I care about their opinions? They should be saying this shit to a therapist, not a “documentary filmmaker”.
2:00 – Hey, Super Awkward Gal. Come on. How the fuck did she make the cut? She has a Youtube channel with very few videos on it, it’s about two years old, and a lot of her videos aren’t even about video games. Why does anyone care what she has to say?
I want to hear from the leading authorities on *nostalgia*. Where’s the head guru of *nostalgia*? Interview that person. This is a serious matter.
“Physical media is something that I think is kind of dying away a little bit.”
You don’t say. I haven’t bought a physical game in 20+ years. I think that we can safely say that it’s done.
2:15 – Some other nobody posits the question: “What do we care about? Right, we care about pop culture.”
Who’s this “we” you’re referring to? I don’t care about pop culture. Don’t bring me into your weird nerd shit.
“Especially in America. Like it’s so American. It’s Americana.”
America, you say. Now this guy is questioning the viewer’s patriotism. “If you don’t like hoarding old games, you’re not a real American.”
Go fuck yourself. I’ll put my patriotism against your faggot ass any day. You don’t get to define the terms. Let’s settle this with an essay contest. “What America Means to Me”.
“Having physical products, you know, is capitalism.”
Oh do tell. So now you’re an expert on political theory too. So nobody owned stuff in the Soviet Union? Nobody owned stuff in feudal times? Nobody owned stuff in caveman days? Are you a fucking idiot?
“I mean, 70s, 80s, 90s, think about how many toys came out, how many actual physical products. Us now trying to actually get that stuff back is a representation of preserving the culture.”
The serfs revolted in the 16th century because they wanted to be able to own a copy of Mario Paint.
“Preserving the culture that matters to us. Preserving the culture that we grew up with.”
Does this guy think that *nostalgia* is a new phenomenon? There was no *nostalgia* before 1970? Yeah, I really want to hear more about this idiot’s opinions on *nostalgia* and the rise of capitalism but we’re moving on to John Hancock.
God, how old is this guy? I’m talking about the weird “Youtuber”, not the early American mercantilism magnate.
I can’t find anything. It’s probably for the best.
2:45 – “I’ve seen collecting destroy people.”
Well, that was brief.
Then we’re back to the unknown junkies. “There’s a dark side where it can interrupt relationships.”
What relationship has this guy ever had? Maybe he means his relationship with oxycontin.
James Rolfe makes an awkward appearance.
“I wouldn’t recommend to the common person to fill up an entire room in their house of video games or movies or anything, which is what I do. I mean, we all have our own personal reasons for doing it.”
Yeah. In James’ case, it’s for the videos. They’re props. He doesn’t actually want this shit. If he wasn’t making the videos, he would have not have all of this shit. Especially not the video games.
And how weird is it that he said “common person”? Like he’s above the common man. James Rolfe is a big time Youtube celebrity. It’s an insight into how he thinks. Just watch that fucking horrible AVGN Movie to see how highly he thinks of himself and how lowly he thinks of his “fans” (i.e. the common people). Mr Seven and a Half Years of Special Education needs a giant dose of reality.
“It’s more of a niche thing. Nobody does this because this is the thing to do. We just do it because we want to and we may all have our different reasons.”
God, he couldn’t give an interesting observation if his life depended on it. I can’t wait for that podcast.
And he had time to prepare for this, presumably. THIS is what he came up? This jumbled mess of generic bullshit that amounts to nothing?
That’s the video. Does it pique my interest in the documentary? Not at all. What the fuck even is it? A bunch of unemployed nerd “Youtubers” talking about *nostalgia* and their bizarre ideas about capitalism? That’s a hard pass from me.