Erin Plays and Mike Matei Stream Random Dreamcast Games! (part 2 of 3)

Part 1 is here:

Back into the den of lies that is Erin Plays.

10:30 – Mike is on the menu screen of the this emulator and Erin says, “This is the first time I’m seeing this, by the way.”

You don’t say.

Mike is talking about how for each game, they show you a picture of the “disc image”, by which he means the art on the physical CD.  I don’t think “disc image” is the right term.  A disc image is a 1:1 copy of a CD or DVD.  You used to see this term on Kazaa or whatever when downloading games.  

Anyway, Mike says that he wants to get a picture for each game and Erin has NO IDEA what he’s talking about.  She just sarcastically says, “Well, you better get on it then.”

11:00 – “I just want to play a little Bust-A-Move.  Also, by the way, so I don’t get any comments about Mike, like, hogging the controller or whatever, I’m having bad hand pain today so we’re switching off.”

Why stream today if you’re in such crippling pain?  Wait until you can actually play the games.  

Obviously, she wants no fucking part of any of this and she’s just repeatedly beating this carpal tunnel lie into the ground.

12:15 – She’s picking her character.  “I’ve never been this guy before.  I’m always Bub or Bob.”

She means in any of the three times that she’s played this game before, on stream, for money.  

13:00 – “I love Bust-A-Move”.

She said this 45 seconds after admitting that she’s only ever played the game with either Bub or Bob.  It really suggests that she hasn’t played the games much.  And she’s talking about the entire series.  

She’s remarkably bad at the game, by the way.  She “loves” this game.

13:15 – Erin is talking about gas prices and how she doesn’t care how high the prices go.  “Whatever.  I’ll pay it.  I have to pay it.”  

Is she paying for her own gas?  How?  She makes a hundred bucks a month.  

14:45 – Shout out to ShiShi.  He asked Erin about Buckey’s.  Whatever that is.  Erin says that she hasn’t been there.  You don’t say.

Oh.  It’s Buc-ee’s.  It’s a chain of gas stations in the South.  Why would she have been there?  Why are they just talking about gas station chains?  Gas stations that aren’t even anywhere near rural Pennsylvania.  And why did Erin say that she wanted to go there?  She wanted to go to a gas station?  Why?  

15:30 – Mike says that he’s been to Texas a couple of times.  Erin says that she’s never been there.  You don’t say.

18:30 – A horntard asks, “How did you and Mike meet” and Mike gets really annoyed by this.  He always gives a passive-aggressive “comedy” answer because the truthful answer is pathetic and sleazy.

Yeah.  He does it again.  Comedy answer about meeting at a party.

19:30 – Then he gives a second “comedy” answer.

Mike: Erin and I met at a Karate Champ tournament.

Erin: The All Valley tournament.

Mike: It was the All Valley Karate Champ tournament.

Erin doesn’t even know that Karate Champ is a video game.  So she made this totally clueless Karate Kid reference.  Mike was then forced to go with this nonsense.

Mike: I was competing because I had done a lot of practice.  I had been reading the instruction booklet, you know, with the arrows like all over the place.

Erin: There’s arrows now?

Erin has NO CLUE what Mike is talking about.  She still thinks that he’s talking about a martial arts tournament.  Even after he said that he read the instruction booklet.  She’s thinking, “Wait…why would you need an instruction booklet to learn about karate?  Is that how it works?  Oh well.”  And then when he mentioned arrows, she was totally lost.  She’s probably thinking about actual, physical arrows.  Like in archery.

Karate Champ.  She’s unfamiliar with the game Karate Champ.  Even when it’s obvious that Mike is talking about video games.  Can’t she just guess what he’s talking about?  This is a stream about video games.  Chances are likely that Mike is going to talk about video games in such a stream.  She’s completely out to lunch.

Mike finishes the story, it’s about how he tied with Erin, and Erin STILL doesn’t know that he’s talking about a video game.  She just gives vague, generic responses.  This is her normal coping strategy when she doesn’t know what somebody is saying.  And she REGULARLY doesn’t know what people are talking about, especially when the topic is video games.

Karate Champ is a pretty well-known game, by the way.  Especially among NES retro gaming enthusiasts, as Erin claims to be.  It has to be the system that she knows the most about and she doesn’t know shit about it.

20:15 – They’re talking about philly cheesesteaks.  Erin says, “I still don’t think that I’ve had that.”  

You don’t say.  And she needs Mike to tell her about food that she’s eaten?  She can’t remember?  And why would Mike remember?  Mike is keeping track of what Erin eats?  

20:45 – “And that’s how we both got carpal tunnel syndrome was with the Karate Champ tournament.”

Erin doesn’t reply because she has NO IDEA what he’s talking about.  “How could we get carpal tunnel syndrome from a karate tournament?  Punching too much?  I don’t get it.  I better just not say anything and hope that he changes the topic soon.”

21:00 – There’s a bubble in Bust-A-Move that, when you hit it, all of the bubbles of the same colour disappear.  Erin encountered such a bubble in an earlier level.  

Now she’s on a different level and thinks that it’s one of these bubbles that I’ve described above.  But it isn’t.  It clearly isn’t.  Anyone who’s played the game before would know this.  But Erin doesn’t.  

She “loves” this game.

22:00 – “I have a hard time memorizing the items because, like you said, there are so many different versions of this game.”

What items?  She’s talking about that bubble that removes all of the bubbles of the same colour.  But it’s the same in every game.  And the bubble she was looking at was CLEARLY just a regular block that does nothing.

23:45 – Erin suggests that people who are subscribed to her aren’t getting notified when there’s a new video.  No, Erin.  They get the notifications.  They just aren’t interested in your boring bullshit.

24:15 – Mike answers a question from the horntards about Erin.  Erin then starts freestyling some lore about how she met Elmo.  Strap in.

“The first time I saw him was at CVS.  He was like, ‘Hey'”  And I was like, ‘What?’   And he was like, ‘I live in your house now.’  And I was like, ‘I don’t know you.’  And then…ummm…the rest is history.”

Brutal.  How does Mike stand this?

Haha.  I thought that Mike was just going to leave it, but no.  He starts picking this ridiculous, unfunny story apart.

Mike: I wonder why he was at CVS.

Erin: Because that’s where he panhandles.  .

Mike: Oh.  Outside?

Erin: Yeah, that’s why I tell him to go…because he’s always asking me for money.

Mike: I see.

Erin: I say to go to CVS because they kick him out of, like, Target or anywhere else.  So CVS doesn’t give a fuck so I tell him to go there.  And then he’s gone for like six hours.  I don’t know.

Mike: He must make a lot of money over there.

Erin: I guess.  Who would have known?

It makes no sense whatsoever.  She started the story by saying that she first met Elmo at CVS.  Then she says that the reason he was at CVS is because she told him to go there because he kept getting kicked out of Target.  And he’s panhandling.  He’s panhandling outside of these stores.  You can make more money panhandling outside of CVS than outside of Target.  Apparently.  No explanation given.  

None of it makes sense.  Erin could not tell a funny story if her life depended on it.  Or even a coherent story.  No charisma whatsoever.  

25:15 – Erin dies.  

Erin: I don’t have to play this forever because I easily can so I’m just going to go until you guys are like, “Erin, can we play something else?”

Mike: Erin, can we play something else?

Erin: Sure.  Do you really want to play something else?

Mike: I do.

Erin: Okay.

Mike: Because we have several hundred games to go through.

You know what Erin could do if she likes the game?  Play it in her spare time like a normal person.

Let me scroll through this video to see what other games they play.  Nothing looks particularly interesting.  But people aren’t tuning into these videos for the games.  They’re here for the amazing banter between Erin and the love of her life Mike Matei.  They make a great comedy act together.  

Part 3:

12 thoughts on “Erin Plays and Mike Matei Stream Random Dreamcast Games! (part 2 of 3)

  1. This one comment said “negative charisma”. It's located all the way at the bottom when sorted by top comments. So her horntards definitely thumbed it down a number of times for it to be located there. That's how the comments work on Youtube. I of course liked the comment however because it's a true statement and honesty should be commended.

  2. Look, I don’t like Erin’s content either, but guess what I don’t watch her nor do I run a blog where I attack her in the most sexist manner ever. Get a life.

  3. The dual directions you took this sanctimonious comment is sus as fuck.Also “attack” LOL

  4. It’s pretty fucking creepy to run a blog devoted to attacking an innocent girl gamer that you’re already not a fan of. Like what is the point?

  5. Except, you simp, this blog isn't “devoted” to one girl. It's a showcase of a number of Youtubers and how full of shit and hypocritical they often are. It's not even exclusively about only female YouTubers too. Some of the dumbest motherfuckers talked about on here are male.

  6. She's completely detestable and deserving of any and all abuse. But if you take the time to read the blog, you will see that it's done in jest.

  7. Yeah detestable only to you. She’s just some girl who’s doing what she likes, stop watching her instead of this obsession you have over hating her so much.

  8. Most of these posts are about Erin, it’s clearly a blog about her.For the record I don’t think Cinemassacre is good anymore but this shit is weird.

  9. Which is more desperate? Writing an entertaining blogpost about the shitshow that is Erin's boring ass streams, or having a hysterical fit in the comments section of said blog? It's funny how you righteously indignant types never get up in arms over the fact these girls are literally scamming lonely men online on a daily basis. No, women can do no wrong, only men. You're a brainwashed simp and that's all you'll ever be. Chow down on more media slop, simp.

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