Searching for Sonic merch – SuperVideoGameGal

This obnoxious…woman.  I know that nobody cares about her.  Frankly, the only gamer grrl that’s of any interest to anyone is Erin Plays.  I concur.  Everybody else is pretty boring but Erin is an endless fountain of mirth.  

But it can’t all be about Erin and her hairbrained fake gamer grrl schemes.  It gets boring and then the harassment allegations start.  So it’s best to spread out the love.  Some of that “variety blog” action.

When we last left our hero SuperVideoGameGal, she was lamenting the loss of her job selling Disney time shares.  So now she’s looking for Sonic “merch”.  Makes sense.  You just lost your job, you’re probably not sitting on a mountain of savings, time to buy some Sonic “merch”.  The essentials.

0:00- Really annoying, smug face, and her awkward as fuck opening as per usual.  

“I saw a post recently that there was a bunch of Sonic stuff at Burlington Coat Factory.”

Oh, that takes me back.  Hey guys!  Remember Burlington Coat Factory?  They’re more than great coats.  They also sell Sonic “merch”.  I guess.  I’ve never fucking been there but they used to play the commercials all the time in “the 90s”.

Oh, and I notice that she has her yappy dog in the back of the car.  Isn’t that nice?  She’s going to take her fucking dog to a store.  Who doesn’t love that?  A dog shitting and pissing in a store.  Shedding.  You’re just trying to do some fucking shopping and you have to watch your feet because some dumb bitch brought her dog to the store.  

I like dogs as much as the next person.  But I don’t want them in the fucking stores.  Is that asking too much?  Keep your fucking dog at home.  Or take him to a walk in a park like a normal person.  

0:15 – She starts singing a jingle.  “Burlington coat factory, where coat is our middle name.”  Is that the new jingle?  As I referenced earlier, “We’re more than great coats” used to be their slogan.  Anyway, you can barely even understand what she’s saying because I think that she’s wearing a mask.  She’s wearing a mask while in her car.  Who is this for?  She doesn’t want to infect her dog?  I’m surprised that she doesn’t put a little mask on the dog.

Then we just cut to her in the car saying, “There was nothing in there.”

Well…what the fuck.  You build up this trip to Burlington Coat Factory so much and then…nothing.  There’s no payoff.  Just fucking edit this whole trip out.

1:15 – So she goes to Walmart.  By the way, I’ve never been to Walmart.  But from everything I’ve seen, it’s…not upscale.  

So she’s going around looking for cheap trash.  Who cares?  Why is she spending her money on this?  She just lost her fucking job.  She needs cheap Sonic slippers and socks this badly?  

1:30 – Then she expresses her concern about not wanting to be around a bunch of people.  Because it’s Sunday and she’s at Walmart.  It’s going to be busy, I guess.  She’s concerned that she might get that nasty coronavirus that’s bringing plague and pestilence to the world.  Mass graves of coronavirus victims that are just burned to make room for the next batch of dead bodies.  When will this scourge end?  

The way these people are reacting, obviously petrified of this coronavirus, why wouldn’t they just build a shack in the woods and wait it out?  That’s what I’d do if I was genuinely afraid of some super virus that’s killing everyone.  Well, not actually build a shack.  I’m not handy.  But I’d buy a fucking cabin in the woods and live there.  

No.  She just stays in “So Cal” and goes on completely unnecessary trips for Sonic “merch”.  She thinks that if she complains enough about coronavirus, that will be enough to ward it off.  It’s about as effective as masks and “social distancing”, I guess.

1:45 – Wait a minute.  She’s bringing the dog with her, right?  She’s not leaving it in the car, is she?  I don’t know what would be worse, really.  Probably leaving it in the car.  It could die.  But bringing a dog with you to Walmart.  Even if she’s carrying it.  This is fucking no class bullshit.  

Then she shows some shirts that come with matching masks.

2:00 – Finally, the money shot.  A Sonic backpack for children.  This trip was worth it.  

What is she going to fucking do with this?  

2:45 – Sonic pyjamas.  Again, they’re for children.  I think.  I hope.

3:45 – Then she’s back in the car and says that she couldn’t justify spending $18 on that children’s backpack.  I mean…come on.  If you’re counting pennies like this, should you really be out shopping to begin with?  For trash?  You just lost your fucking job.

4:15 – She says that her husband bought her the Sonic movie DVD and she plans to watch it until it “wears out” and then buy another one.  

Does she know about digital content?  You can probably go to fucking Pirate Bay and get this for free.  Hey guys!  Remember Pirate Bay?  It’s still around.

And who the fucking is watching the Sonic movie so much that the fucking DVD wears out?  Did this even get good reviews?  No.  No it did not.  63% on Rotten Tomatoes.

5:00 – Now she’s back at her home.  It’s hard to understand her.  I think that she’s wearing a mask.  In her home.  

She starts her computer and we can see her Married with Children wallpaper.  Hey guys!  Remember Married with Children?  I’m surprised that a real “SJW” like this woman would be a fan of such a misogynistic program.  I mean, I don’t give a fuck but the show was clearly misogynistic.  Al didn’t like the fat women who came into his store; there were a lot of like busty porn stars and shit on the show; there was the No Ma’am club; the female characters were all stupid, sexually promiscuous, and lazy; Al (inexplicably) never wanted to have sex with his wife; all kinds of shit.

6:30 – Wait a minute.  And her mouse pad is a busty anime girl.  This is…what?  Who the fuck would buy this?  What woman would want such a mouse pad?  What man would want such a mouse pad?  Fucking anime-obsessed losers like Shishi who can’t get a date.  

7:30 – “It’s been kind of crazy with the new job.”  

What?  So she’s working now?  Let me check her Twitter.

Well, there’s about 50 posts about AVGN shit, and she name drops her “friend” John Riggs, but nothing about a job.

9:00 – She talks about how she accepted a job offer.  And she says, “ya-ll”.  Twice.  So it wasn’t an accident.  I didn’t know that they said that in “So Cal”.

So that’s the video.  It was advertised as…well…”Searching for Sonic merch”.  I suppose that’s technically true.  She did look.  But then decided that this cheap children’s trash was too expensive.  

On to the comments.

Oh, Erin Plays is graced with the top comment.  She says:

– “Just started watching but omg EVERY TIME I see something I want on Instagram at a store like Burlington/home goods/etc I never find it lol. I’ll be on the lookout for you tho!”

Yeah, that’s another thing that crossed my mind.  Has this woman never heard of the internet?  You can get all kinds of shit on the internet.  Let me check a little site I know about called Amazon dot com.  I’ll just search “sonic”.  No…not the SonicCare toothbrush.  That’s boring adult stuff.  

Ah here we go.  A Sonic birthday party set for six year olds.  You get paper plates, a Sonic balloon, a balloon of the number six, and maybe some other shit.  $17.

A Sonic costume.  Yeah, I’m not even going to look at that.

A Sonic children’s watch for $10.  It’s digital so good for kids who can’t yet read time.

They have a plush.  They have children’s books.  A remote control car.  Posters.  Children’s backpacks.  A hat.  All kinds of shit.  And you don’t even have to brave the crowds at Walmart.  All of those infected people.

– “As much as we really want to see you as often as we can , I understand what you’re going through, so plz take ur time , because when you feel better I know you’ll create greate vlogs. Praying for you n your state to open up n recover and prosper!!!”

What a fucking creep.  She’s married, you loser.

– “Hey beautiful missed you glad you got a job and things are going good for you hope to see more content from you when you get a chance again take care”

What the fuck is wrong with these people?  And she’s commenting and “hearting” these comments.  So what’s wrong with her?

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