Ecco the Dolphin (Sega Genesis) – Angry Video Game Nerd (AVGN)

It’s unwatchable but Erin gets a bizarre shoutout at 5:15.

“I’ve read in Zoobooks that the average dolphin can hold its breath for eight to ten minutes.”

And then there’s a link to Erin’s atrocious video about Zoobooks.

Does James have any control whatsoever over the channel?  Did he know that Erin’s channel would be linked to during this video?  

I have to assume that no money was exchanged over this.  So why would he agree to it?  Erin isn’t even in the Screenwave network, as far as I’m aware.  So there’s no like intra-company promotion.  

This “joke” was obviously inserted solely so that they could link to Erin’s shitty channel.  Was the game also chosen as a way to shoehorn this link into the video?  

James gains absolutely nothing from this link.  He only loses.  He loses whatever credibility he had by linking to this awful channel and only doing so because it’s Mike’s sugarbaby.  

Who was actually responsible for this?  I have to assume Mike.  He owns the fucking channel.  

It’s people taking advantage of a guy with a mental disability.  Completely disgusting.  And what’s going to be gained from it?  Nobody clicks those links anyway.  Everybody who goes to Cinemassacre already knows about Erin’s channel because Mike promotes the channel there aggressively.  

Everyone has seen the channel, it’s shit, and they’re not coming back.  No amount of promotion can get people to watch god awful content.  You can get them to watch once, see what it’s all about, but then they’re out of there.  

I refuse to believe that anyone thinks that Erin’s videos are good.  I can understand people like Shishi watching the video.  They have some kind of bizarre sexual fetish for women who play video games, even when it’s obviously fake.  They’re there for masturbatory purposes.

But watching her videos and saying, “Hey, this is good.  This is interesting.  I like this and I want to watch more.”  No.  Nobody is doing that.  It’s impossible.

Take somebody like Pelvic Gamer.  Her videos are bad and a lot of people are watching just because they have this bizarre sexual fetish, but I can understanding people watching for non-sexual reasons.  She’s reviewing JRPGs, she does a decent job of it, if you’re interested in that shit, go watch the videos.  I can’t criticise anyone for that.

Same with Pam aka CannotBeEntertaining.  People are obviously there to jerk off because they have this weird fetish but I’m sure that there are people who go there because they want to hear reviews of 30 year old video games.  And maybe people are interested in hearing her views about politics and feminism.

Erin has nothing.  She has absolutely no interest, experience, or knowledge about video games.  She has no charisma.  She’s never said anything (intentionally) funny.  She’s never said anything interesting.  She’s boring.  Why would anybody watch these videos, other than to jack off if you have the appropriate fetish?  

I’m trying to think of a universally hated movie or tv show but I’m struggling.  Santa Claus Conquers the Martians or something.  No, I can see people enjoying it non-ironically.  Appreciating the set design and the 1950s shit.  

Showgirls is another one.  No, I enjoyed it.  Breasts.  It’s unintentionally funny at times.  Work obviously went into it.

The AVGN Movie.  I can see people enjoying some of the special effects.  

Erin.  Nothing.  No redeeming qualities.  

Even her videos that aren’t about video games, like this 90s children’s commercials video are unwatchable.  Nobody can possibly be entertained by this.  Nobody can possibly appreciate these videos on any level.

Everybody knows this.  You look on Reddit and not a single person has ever had anything positive to say about Erin other than on her appearance.  Nobody has ever said, “Hey, I like the videos.”

Compare that to something like Rental Reviews, which are the source of much scorn by these people on Reddit, and you’ll see people who say, “No, I like them.  I don’t understand the hate.”  And I liked some of them.

Same with AVGN.  Everybody will immediately shit on the video, probably without even watching it, but you’ll see comments saying that it wasn’t bad.  Or even that it was good.  

Erin, nothing.  I have never seen a single positive comment about her videos.

But she keeps trying.  And Mike keeps cramming this shit down everyone’s throats, using the Cinemassacre channel as the vehicle.  And now he’s using actual AVGN videos for this.  

If James is doing this promotion of his own free will, what is he getting out of it?  We know what Mike’s getting.  He’s in a buttsex for Youtube promotion agreement.  Is James likewise engaged?  

Or is this a case of morally deficient people taking advantage of a man who’s obviously mentally challenged?  

Either way, it’s shady as fuck and no good can come of it.  You’re going to destroy the channel with this Erin Plays shit and it’s totally futile.  Erin is never going to be a success on Youtube.  Just watch  the fucking videos and see why.  

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