Erin Plays and Mike Matei play spooky NES games! – Erin Plays (part 3 of 3)

57:00 – “Frankenstein on NES. Yeah, Shishi kept mentioning this.”

You can’t disappoint your number one fan.

“I don’t remember how I feel about that game.”

Eugh. Have to do this “joke” again. Erin “always” “forgets” how she feels about Frankenstein for the NES. BECAUSE SHE ONLY PLAYED IT ONCE, ON STREAM, FOR MONEY, BRIEFLY. It’s not a case of “forgetting”. It’s a case of NOT KNOWING. She has no experience with the game.

It’s not how the fucking language works. I don’t know anything about trigonometry. I never took a trigonometry class. So I wouldn’t say that I “forgot” everything about trigonometry. I’d say, “I don’t know anything about trigonometry.” I’ve NEVER known anything about it. So there’s nothing to “forget”. It’s a total lack of knowledge.

What is trigonometry anyway? Now I’m curious.

“”he branch of mathematics concerned with specific functions of angles and their application to calculations”

Oh yeah. Fuck that shit. Not to be anti-intellectual. If you want to learn that shit, by all means do so. But I’m not interested.

58:10 – “My BBM’s fucked up.”

At first, I thought that she said, “My BM’s fucked up”. That’s way more information than we need, Erin. Eat a banana or something. I don’t know what to tell you. But no. “BBM”. What’s a BBM? I have no fucking idea. I “always” “forget” what a BBM is.

58:45 – So the game starts and Erin says, “Oh, shit. I have played this.”

Earlier, she said that she can’t remember how she feels about this game. But from her subsequent comment, it’s clear that she didn’t recall the game AT ALL. Why didn’t she just say that? Everything has to be a lie with Erin. She’s incapable of telling the truth.

“Recently-ish. Meaning in the past two years.”

That’s recent in Erin’s mind? Playing a game briefly, on stream, for money, within the past two years? It’s ridiculous.

“I totally forgot this was what it was.”

We all know the joke. Let’s just move on.

58:45 – “I already drank almost all of my water.”

Who the fuck cares? Why would she say this? Negative charisma. That’s why.

1:03:30 – Mike is at the Grim Reaper boss of stage 1. Erin says, “There’s little Death. He looks cute.”

I’m getting very close to ending this.

1:04:00 – I’m glad I waited. Erin does the world’s worst Jon Lovitz impression. I don’t even get it. At all. She just looks down. That’s the impression. You know…Jon Lovitz is always looking down. I guess. What the fuck is this?

Oh. I had this video playing in a window but when you enlarge it, you get some more of the nuance. Here it is:

Yeah, that’s Jon Lovitz alright. He’s always putting his head down and looking up. Right? I guess? Erin is a real Rich Little.

Let me look this up. Maybe she’s right about Jon Lovitz’ mannerisms. I don’t know much about him. I enjoyed his work on The Critic and I know what he looks like but I’m not the world’s biggest Jon Lovitz fan.

I’m searching Google Images for a picture where Jon Lovitz is looking down like this. Nothing so far.

No. Nothing. And I even tried a few search terms to look for that expression. I have a vague feeling that he does do some weird expression but I’m not seeing anything. Anyway, I’m sure that Erin’s impression is dead on. She’s all about Jon Lovitz.

What other impressions could Erin do? Why not Britney Spears? Maybe she can put on some kind of Britney Spears costume for Halloween. Then maybe she could sing a little. Dance a little. Shishi would shit his pants.

Or what about Gene Rayburn? Erin is a big Gene Rayburn fan, or as she calls him, Ray Borne. She could put a brown three piece suit on and ask some inuendo-laden questions. “Dumb Dora is so dumb that when the baker asked if she wanted extra cream in her buns, she pulled down her blank.”

Man, I’ve been there. Bakers always asking if you want extra cream in your buns. I won’t say how long it took me to come up with that.

1:04:30 – “When I was little, the first nightmares I remember were being about J-Lo.”

Fascinating stuff, Erin. Maybe I should just think of some more Dumb Dora questions.

“Probably means something. I should probably talk to a professional.”

Yeah, it means that you’re fucking boring and possibly racist. Let’s talk about something interesting for a change.

I wouldn’t mind putting some extra cream in J-Lo’s buns, though.

Mike ignores all of this, by the way.

1:05:00 – Erin asks something about the game and Mike says, “I don’t know. I haven’t played this in ten years.” Erin replies, “Yeah, I don’t remember what you’re supposed to do here.”

I’m done. Let’s check out the comments.

  • “I would love a misses that playes games mfm you lucky duck”

Misses indeed, you fucking retard.

  • “Erin got a nice little wap”

I have no idea what this even means.

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