Erin Plays and Mike Matei check out Pac-Man Museum + on Switch! (part 5 of 6) 

Everybody likes Pac-Man.

1:12:45 – So we’re back from break.  Erin got a sweater.  It’s yellow.  That’s a good colour.  Reminds me of Pac-Man.  

Actually, this is more of an orangey-yellow.  Maybe ochre?  No, it’s a bit lighter than ochre.  Maybe peach?  Is this a peach sweater?  No.  Saffron.  Definitely saffron.  

So Erin is there in her saffron sweater ready to spring back into action.  This is Pac-Man.  Let’s get the party started here.

1:13:00 – Pac & Roll Remix.  Never heard of it.  But I’m sure that Erin will pretend to be an expert at the game.

1:14:00 – Erin is sharing carpal tunnel coping strategies with Mike.

1:15:00 – Erin says that she likes the water in the game.  Mike ignores this comment.

1:15:45 – Erin refers to a power pellet as “the orb”.

1:16:15 – Now it’s Erin’s turn to play.  Let’s see how she does.  My prediction: poorly.

Oh my god.  I was not prepared for this.  This is fucking unbelievably bad.  Even by Erin standards.  She’s not even trying to get the pellets, even though Mike told her at the start, “You have to get every pellet.”  She’s just wildly bouncing off of the walls and going as fast as possibly.  There’s no control in any of this.  This is fucking terrible.  A toddler could do better than this.

1:17:30 – “Okay, this is fun.  It took me a second to get the hang of it.”

This is Erin getting the hang of it?  Just watch this footage.  It’s unbelievable.

1:22:00 – She’s still playing and hasn’t figured out the controls or the rules AT ALL.

I don’t want to watch this any more.  This is painfully bad.  Change the fucking game.  

1:25:15 – Now she’s lost.  She’s lost on this tiny fucking map.  She keeps going back and forth between these two rooms.

Mike, mercifully, tells her to stop playing.  What the fuck was this?  How could anybody play a video game this poorly?

1:26:00 – Pac Moto.  This looks similar to the game that they were just playing.  

1:28:15 – “Do I buy any modern game magazines?  No.”

Good chat, Erin.

1:29:15 – Erin says “Sega Ages” instead of “Sega Visions”.  Then she looks at the camera and says, “I got confused”.  Erin “always” “forgets” that it’s Sega Visions, not Sega Ages.

My issue isn’t that she doesn’t know the name of a long defunct magazine.  I have no idea what either of those things are.  The issue is the blatant lies.  She’s not remotely interested in any of this shit.  Why not just say it?  

If somebody was asking my opinion about Sega Ages or Sega Visions to me, I’d say, “I don’t know what you’re talking about and, to be honest, I don’t give a shit.”  That doesn’t mean that I’m not interested in video games.  You don’t have to know every single facet about video game history to be interested in video games.

Of course, Erin doesn’t know ANYTHING about video game history but that’s a separate matter.

1:33:30 – The game is over and Erin didn’t play this one.

1:34:00 – Pac-Man 256.  Give Erin the controller.  Come on.  This isn’t how you play games with your friend.  You’re supposed to take turns.  Erin is going to tell her mom that you weren’t sharing and then she won’t come over to play video games any more.

1:34:15 – A horntard says that Erin would have loved the 1980s.  Erin aka Cykill1986 says that she was born in “late 1987” so doesn’t remember the 1980s.

1:35:45 – Erin says that her mother used to like 7th Heaven.  Wasn’t this some religious show about angels or something?  This might help explain things.  Let me look this up.

No, but it has religious themes and seems the sort of thing that would have been popular with Christian fundamentalists.  Maybe Erin’s parents were some weird religious types.  

1:36:15 – A horntard asks if Erin is getting “a pair of Sailor Moon bands”.  Whatever that is.  Maybe I misheard.  Erin says that she hopes to get them but they’re hard to get.  Mike says, “We’re getting them.”  

Oh.  Vans.  But yeah, Mike wanted to assure his sugarbaby that he’s going to get her the shoes.  Shoes that she doesn’t give a fuck about featuring a character that she doesn’t give a fuck about.  

And what 35 year old woman would wear Sailor Moon shoes?  Even if they were interested in the character, which Erin is not.

How much money is Mike spending on this fraud?  And for what?  I don’t get it.  She must be absolutely brutal to listen to.  She never has anything remotely interesting to say.  She’s an idiot.  And…I mean…how good can the buttsex possibly be?  That’s the only thing that she’s contributing to this relationship.  

She doesn’t cook.  She doesn’t bring in any money.  Her conversations skills are abysmal.  Does she clean?  

She’s just a parasite.  It’s completely baffling.  Why would he pay for this?  

1:38:00 – So now it’s Erin’s turn to play Pac-Man 256.  A few seconds earlier, Erin claimed that the game was “addicting”.  Let’s see how addicted she is to the game. 

Oh my god.  She’s going the wrong direction.  Wasn’t she watching Mike play?

Mike tells her that you have to go up because the thing at the bottom is trying to kill you.  Erin says, “Oh, I forgot about that part.”

Yeah.  Erin “always” “forgets” about the fundamental nature of this game.

1:38:45 – Erin is surprised at some power up that she got.  Why?  She said that she played the game before.  The game addicting.  Mike also got this power up NUMEROUS TIMES during his playthrough just today.  Wasn’t she watching?

1:39:00 – Game over for Erin.  That was a quick one.

1:40:00 – Game over again.  She did even worse this time.

1:41:30 – Another game over.  But she keeps playing.  Poorly.  REALLY poorly.  She must be addicted to the game.

1:43:00 – Erin pretends to know who Dick Van Dyke is.  She just gave a generic response, as usual.

1:43:30 – Another game over.  

Now Mike is playing.

1:45:30 – Now Mike is playing Pac-Man Arrangement.  A different one from earlier.

1:46::15 – Mike says that one of the games is called Pac-Man Arrangement CS.  Erin interrupts with “customer service”.  Must be a reference to her days working at a record store.  They must have said this.

1:47:00 – Now it’s Erin’s turn.

1:50:00 – Erin says that she likes this version of the game a lot more because “I’m not doing super horrible.”

It’s true.  This must be a much easier game because Erin is getting through the levels without much difficulty.

1:54:00 – Erin says that a wavy font looks, “Like something out of Bust a Move”.  This is a game that she played on stream, for money.

1:55:00 – “This game is very cute.”

Uh huh.

1:58:30 – Mike got up to have a conversation with Ernie off-screen.  Erin just sits there awkwardly while this is going on.

2:00:00 – Now they’re going to play a different game.  We can stop here.

Only 40 minutes to go.  This is just getting boring now.  But I should be able to finish this in one or two more parts.  

6 thoughts on “Erin Plays and Mike Matei check out Pac-Man Museum + on Switch! (part 5 of 6)

  1. So Ernie gets criticized for spending Mike's money without contributing…but Erin gets a pass for doing the exact same thing… mkay. Oh the irony.

  2. Ernie at least has some charisma and can hold a conversation. But I suppose because he's (presumably) not giving his ass up to Mike, he becomes a target for abuse.

  3. You just wrote six LONG write ups about a random internet girl you hate. I believe you have claimed in the past to be in your 40s and have had relationships, but I can't help but feel these are lies. This is pathetic and embarrassing. At first I thought this blog was funny but this is hard to watch unfold.

  4. The video was nearly three hours long and nobody else was uploading. And videos with Mike in them are more watchable. I don't know what relationships have to do with anything. Whether I write six articles about six videos or six articles about one long video, the pathetic ratio is the same, if not more favourable for this long video. I usually write one long article about a ten minute Erin Plays video. For this video, each article contains about 25 minutes of footage.Frankly, I wanted to get even more articles out of this video. I was hoping for about ten. Can't you appreciate the comedy in this? The thing that you're complaining about is exactly what makes it funny. Of course this Pac-Man video is trivial. All of the videos I talk about are trivial. Therein lies the comedy. I'm taking something trivial and treating it as though it's important.Anyway, if you didn't appreciate Erin Week, you don't have to read the articles. Hopefully Newt does something nutty soon.

  5. She is the reason the blog even started. So getting mad about any write-up specifically about her, and not one of the lesser knowns on here, is kind of ridiculous.Surely your comment will end the blog or have any effect lol.

  6. Anon: fair enough if you felt that way. But I bet my left nut that you'd never make the same accusations of fraud against Erin herself, and we all know why.

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