The Plan for *bargain * Retro Game Hunts as lockdown lifts – TheGebs24

This woman was in MetalJesusRocks’ recent “collab” video.  I talk about it here:

I’ve seen videos from this woman before.  She’s awful.  You can’t listen to that shit.  I think that she’s Australian but lives in the UK.  

Wait…that’s not right?  According to her Twitter, she’s British.

Why does she sound like that?  It’s quite possibly the worst accent I’ve ever heard in my life.  

In one of her tweets, she has “Midlands” as a hashtag.  That’s like Manchester, isn’t it?  Let me DuckDuckGo this.  No, Manchester is further north.  Birmingham is the largest city in the Midlands.

Well, I guess it makes sense then.  I don’t have much familiarity with the region or its people.  But yeah, it’s absolutely brutal listening to her.

By the way, she has “MUST WATCH” in the title of her video but I omitted that clickbait bullshit from my title.  There is absolutely nothing “must watch” about this video.

0:00 – The video starts with her kicking her leg out and then a shot of her bending over.  It’s some fucking old soccer mom.  Albeit, the childless, lesbian variety.  But body-wise…I don’t get it.

People in the comments have time-stamped this leg kick.  And this is what she does.  In a lot of her videos, she intentionally shows her legs.  

I don’t even understand the concept of guys who are interested in legs.  What does a good leg look like compared to a bad leg?  They all pretty much look the same to me.  

I have the same opinion on buttocks.  Okay, I can see that Asian women tend to have flatter asses and black women tend to have larger asses but the difference is miniscule.  And who gives a fuck anyway?  Within people of the same race, I can’t decipher any difference.  Only at these two racial extremes do I notice any difference.

Breasts, I can understand.  We all have an idea of what a good breast looks like: big.  And then you can look at shape and whatnot but I don’t want to drag down the intellectual discourse of this blog.  I only raise this because there are clear differences between breasts but legs?  They all look pretty much the same.  

Hustler used to produce a magazine called Leg Show.  So I know that the fetish exists but…it’s baffling.

The second issue I have with this is why Gebs24?  This is a chubby woman knocking on 40.  What about this screams “sex symbol”?

0:45 – This is just some montage of her in a video game store or something but she shows her girlfriend at this point.  Her girlfriend is a big bull dyke.  Not that Gebs is exactly feminine herself.

I was reading an article recently about a couple of lesbians.  It was about how they met.  And the one said of the other, “She was the least girly girl who I ever met so I knew that she was for me.”  And both of these women were really butch.  

If you like feminine women, okay, I get it.  I’m with you on that.  But why masculine women?  I mean, why not just go for men if you like masculine people?  

Well, maybe it’s like asking if you like feminine women, why not feminine men?  

I’m two fucking minutes into this and she’s still doing the musical “preview” of the upcoming video.  Just get on with it.  She’s trying to reach the 10 minute mark to be able to monetise, I guess.

2:15 – FINALLY we get footage of these two heifers in a car and Gebs is complaining that there’s something in her eye.  What a great way to start the video.

And her girlfriend is American.  She’s not doing anything to dispel the myth that Americans are fat.

Oh fuck.  That only lasted a few seconds.  Now we’re back to the montage.  GET TO THE VIDEO.  Or is this it?  It’s just going to be one big musical montage?

2:45 – Now we’re back to these two old porkers in their car.  I mean, I don’t want to be ageist or talk about people’s weight but come on.  You have two fat women women crammed into this little car.  It reminds me of Clarissa Dickson Wright and Jennifer Paterson.

Then it’s just this fucking…I mean…I don’t want to keep describing her as “fat American” but I don’t know her name.  So this fat American then just starts talking about what she PLANS on buying when stores re-open.  I mean…what the fuck do I care?  What does anyone care about this?  I don’t even know this person.  Even if I knew her, why would I care what she plans to purchase?  

4:15 – She says “bollocks of shipping them” in reference to the difficulty in shipping consoles versus handhelds.

This is just embarrassing.  Americans using British slang.  

I use British spelling because I’ve lived in the UK for many years and I write a lot for my job so I try to keep the practice up.  But I don’t use British slang because it sounds fake and gay, no offence to these ladies.  And that’s why Gebs laughed when this fat chick said “bollocks”.  It’s stupid.  She sounds stupid saying it.

And I don’t even think that she used the word correctly.  I’ve never heard the term used like that.  And I’m not even sure if people really say “bollocks” any more.  

6:00 – They get into a bizarre argument.  I won’t even…I mean…it’s some weird…just check it out yourself if you’re interested.

8:45 – The fat chick says, “Take the mick”.  Fuck off.

10:00 – Then they end the video with a one minute tutorial on how to subscribe to the channel.  She REALLY wants those pennies for monetised 10 minute videos.

So what was this?  It was a three minute musical montage of looking at games in a video game store and then seven minutes of two fat chicks in a clown car having weird homosexual arguments with each other.  Who would watch this “bollocks”?  Cor blimey, gun’vor.

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