https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9cwHpC7AJ3Y
Hello, desperation. Wii Sports.
I recall Erin saying that she played this game with her parents. When was this game released? Late 2006. So Erin must have been…like 18 or 19. At least. That’s assuming that she bought it soon after it was released, which seems unlikely.
What’s the official lore regarding Erin and her history with video games. She had about three games as a child…then I think in high school she wasn’t playing any games, and then she got into it “again” after high school. So that checks out, I guess. Playing Wii Sports with your parents as an 18/19 year old. That’s what hardcore “gaming” was about in 2006.
I just thought of something. Why don’t Erin’s parents start a Youtube channel about retro video games? They played Wii Sports, after all. And her father bought Return of Arcade for the PC. He’s just as much a “gamer” as Erin is. Maybe moreso. I don’t know his full history with games.
Or here’s an idea, why doesn’t Erin move back in with her parents and they can all be on the channel together? Who sucks at Mario worse: Erin or her mother? The world wants to know. And it would be wholesome stuff. Yeah, it would be boring as fuck but can it be any worse than her channel currently is?
0:00 – “Oh my god. We have so many Bulbasaurs. It’s Bulbination in the chat.”
People spam Bulbasaur emojis in her chat. I don’t know why. I also don’t know why this is allowed. Who wants to look at this shit? But Bulbasaur is like…Erin’s…Pokemon. If you want to discover Erin’s knowledge of Pokemon, you can check out her “My Favorite Dumb Pokemon” video. Spoiler: she’s completely clueless. I did a review of that video but it was on my sub. I’ll re-upload it at some point. It was quite possibly the worst video she’s ever done.
0:15 – Speaking of emotes, I do have some ideas. I think that I might do an emote stream.”
She got “partnered” on Twitch, which basically just means you get some more “emotes”.
Why do they keep changing the names of these stupid things anyway? It went from smiley, to emoticon, to emoji, and now emote? Just fucking pick something,. Fucking nerd shit.
Anyway, apparently this stream is just going to be Erin introducing the new “emotes”. That will be riveting stuff.
0:30 – “I haven’t played this in years so please be kind.”
She has more experience with this game than just about any other game she’s ever played. She apparently actually played this one before. With her parents When she was 18/19 years old. I can’t imagine that it was for very long but it’s still more than her usual SECONDS of experience with a game. Or even not even that much.
Then one of the horndogs wants the Elmo balloon back so she brings him in. She says that she had to get rid of the streamers because there wasn’t enough room.
This is just fucking pathetic. She’s doing this for $200/month. Is this at all worth it? An actual job would pay so much more.
Oh, I should reference Erin’s larger physique. Maybe this is her way to get some exercise. Even her exercising has to be done on stream, for money.
And wait a minute. Doesn’t she have a crippling back injury? How is she able to play this?
1:45 – She’s reading from the chat. “Have I played the Famicom Crazy Castle game with Roger Rabbit? No.”
I don’t understand these fucking idiots. Have you seen her do a stream or Youtube video of the game? Then she hasn’t fucking played it.
Then she says that she wants to play other Crazy Castle games. It’s implied that she means on stream, for money. Because if she wanted to play these games, why wouldn’t she just do it? Play in your spare time.
3:15 – “I would play this for hours.
She’s talking about how she used to play this game for hours, not that she would theoretically play the game for hours. It has to be a lie.
And speaking of lies, there is no way that Erin had a crippling back injury and is able to play this. She’s playing the tennis game.
Then she shows off her Jem t-shirt. Hey guys! Remember Jem?
Yeah, I remember Jem. It was a cartoon that was broadcast from 1985 to 1988. Erin wasn’t even born.
Oh, and she doesn’t know the rules of tennis. Never mind the odd scoring system, she doesn’t even know HOW you score points. She would play this game “for hours”.
4:00 – “I kind of want to do a video on this, actually.”
No surprises there. That’s why she’s doing the stream. This is her “research” for the upcoming Youtube video. All done on stream, for money, of course.
And I don’t want to be needlessly offensive but I REALLY don’t need to see Erin’s arm jiggling.
4:30 – “This is what’s going to happen. I’m going to leave it hooked up and I’m just going to play Wii all the time. Even if I don’t stream it, in my spare time I’ll just play so much Wii.”
She’s saying this as a joke. In her mind, it’s totally absurd to play video games unless you’re playing on stream, for money.
4:45 – “Yeah, this is good for a standing stream because I still can’t really sit normally.”
Oh, sure. I hear that doctors recommend that when you have a crippling back injury, you should play tennis.
She’s really bad at the game, by the way. She lost the first game.
5:30 – “I don’t have a Wii U. I was going to get a Wii U but then they announced the Swtich. I missed out.”
The Wii U came out in 2012. The Switch came out in 2017. Erin started her channel in 2017. This is why she skipped the Wii U. She wasn’t playing video games at that time. She only started when she started her channel.
And Erin gets shut out. Match goes to the computer. Final score of that set: 0-40.
She would play this for hours.
7:45 – “The Atari 2600 is the best console? I mean, it’s a good contender. I like it a lot.”
She played Atari games ONCE. On stream, for money.
Actually, I can’t even remember her doing any Atari stream. But I remember her playing some other ancient console and repeatedly calling Breakout “Breakaway”.
8:30 – “More Amiga streams? I’ve never played an Amiga. I would like to.”
First of all, it’s not at all shocking that she never played an Amiga. We never saw a stream of it, after all.
But secondly, WHY WOULD SHE WANT TO? She went her whole fucking life without playing any Amiga games. WHY NOW? Why does she want to play these ancient games now?
And why on an Amiga? Virtually all of these games had PC releases. Or DOS or whatever the term would be. Why does she want to play them specifically on an Amiga?
Maybe the graphics or sound was slightly better on an Amiga. I don’t know. But do you think fucking Erin knows?
8:45 – “What’s it called? The ZX Spectrum? Never played that either.”
Why is she just listing ancient computers that she never played before? And again, WHY WOULD SHE WANT TO?
If you want to play old games that were compatible on the Amiga or the ZX Spectrum JUST PLAY THEM ON YOUR FUCKING COMPUTER. Use fucking Moslo or whatever that program is to get it to work. Dos Box. I don’t know. I haven’t done this shit in 20 years.
I know that there are Amiga and ZX Spectrum emulators but that’s only for HARDCORE NERDS who for whatever nerdy as fuck reason want to play on an emulator rather than their PC.
I know that there were some games exclusive to the Amiga but without even knowing what they are, I’m going to go on a limb and say that they’re all shit. They were probably shit in their day (which is why they weren’t given PC releases) and they’re definitely shit today.
Were there ZX Spectrum exclusives? Yeah, it seems about…forty or so. Again, without knowing anything about it, they’re probably all shit. Each was made by some British nerd in his basement in about two weeks.
I’m not interested in that shit. But Erin is interested? But not interested enough to have actually done it. She’s waiting to do it on stream, for money.
“The Atari 5200? Yeah, I think Mike finally got that to work.”
She never played this either. But she probably wants to. On stream, for money.
“I want to do a 7800 stream.”
She never played any of these games either. Why not play the games first IN YOUR SPARE TIME and then do it on stream, for money?
I mean, WHY would she want to do a 7800 stream? She doesn’t know anything about the games. She never played them before. She doesn’t even know what they are.
Because she’s desperate for “content” and wants money from mentally challenged, horny losers.
9:45 – “Isn’t the 7800 a repackaged 2600? Well, the graphics are better.”
Thank you for that dazzling insight. It’s not like every single fucking person in the chat, no matter how mentally challenged, didn’t already know that. But that’s the only piece of trivia that she’s able to relay because she knows NOTHING about either console.
“It’s a little different.”
It’s MASSIVELY different. There’s a huge improvement in graphics. But of course, Erin doesn’t know this.
11:00 – She finds the word “deuce” funny. She’s totally unfamiliar with this tennis term. In spite of the fact that she would play the game for hours.
11:30 – “Use the front Erin? Like this (makes motion). I don’t know what you mean.”
The chat brings up an excellent point. She’s playing this game in doubles but she only uses the back character. The front character hasn’t been used ONCE. You must be able to control both characters. You press a button to change characters, I would assume. She hasn’t done this ONCE and DOESN’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THIS GUY IS TALKING ABOUT!
She would play this game for hours.
Now that this guy mentions this, it makes this whole thing even more preposterous. She’s just using the fucking back character. This is stupid. She doesn’t have a CLUE how to play this game. She CLEARLY has NEVER PLAYED IT BEFORE.
Then she loses. Again.
12:15 – “Oh. You mean there are two players front and back? Ohhhhh! I forgot. How do you switch?”
How could she possibly have forgotten? She would play this game for hours.
“Oh. You switch by pressing B. It’s called B, right? It’s been so long.”
You know what? I’m done.