https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P4S0GytG4fI
0:00 – “RetroMania did not pay for this video, they did not sponsor or endorse this video but they did provide me a digital copy of this game for the purpose of this video so I could check out the game. Actually, they didn’t even say that they wanted a video out of it. They’re just like, ‘Hey, here’s the game. Go ahead and check it out. But if you happen to do a video, don’t show anything until today.”
Hey, Riggs, I’m not fucking retarded. Maybe you are but I’m not. They clearly sent this game expecting a video. Expecting a glowing video. And that’s what he delivers.
0:30 – Then he goes on an absolutely insane rant about what it felt like when he found out that his wife was pregnant. He goes into great detail about first hearing the heartbeat at the hospital, what that sounded like, and whatever. The first time I listened to this, I didn’t even understand why he was talking about this.
On the second viewing, I get it. He’s comparing the wait that he had for this game to the wait that he had for the birth of his children. And he’s not joking. What a fucking lunatic.
1:30 – The makers of this game contacted Riggs some time in the past asking if they could use his likeness for a wrestling game that they planned on. This idea then morphed into RetroMania. They got rid of the “Youtuber” wrestling idea and changed it to licensed wrestlers. But Riggs is still in the game as a character in the audience in one of the arena.
What a climbdown that is. He went from being a character in the game to a background character in one of the stages.
This is what it was like for John Riggs’ children. They come into the world all full of excitement. There’s so much to learn and experience. It’s going to be fun. They’re going to have a good time.
And then they find out that John Riggs is their father. This fucking freak. This unemployed loser who’s constantly trying to cheat on their mother with every random gamer grrl he can find. It really puts a damper on the whole being born thing.
3:00 – “I don’t play games on Steam.”
What? I think by “Steam” he meant PC games generally because he goes on to list systems that he does play games on, and it’s all consoles.
Who the fuck doesn’t play PC games in this day and age? This guy just lost all “gaming” credibility with me.
5:00 – He finally shows his appearance in the game. It’s his fucking logo on one of the announcer desks. And I think it’s supposed to be him sitting behind the desk. Without the flannel shirt, I can’t be sure. It’s some fat guy with glasses, a beard, and a baseball cap. Probably supposed to be Riggs.
5:30 – Then he shows a wrestling video game hack that he made where he put himself and his “Youtuber” friends in the game.
6:00 – Wait…he also appears in the ring apron. Is this right or is this a custom apron? If this is a regular ring in the game, it’s fucking ridiculous. Who would want to play a game with John Riggs’ giant logo in the centre of the ring?
Then the video just sort of ends. He didn’t really give too many details. He did say that it was sort of like Fire Pro, though, in the sense that there’s are weak, medium, and strong attacks and you have to build up to the strong attacks.
Let’s check if anyone made an edit of John Riggs for Fire Pro Wrestling World. I’ll just load up the workshop on Steam. I’m one of these crazy people who plays PC games.
No, it seems that there is absolutely zero demand out there for John Riggs edits.
A wrestling game that features Youtubers. Is there possibly a market for that? And they were going so low as to ask John Riggs to be in the game. It wasn’t like PewDiePie or somebody. JOHN RIGGS was going to be in the game.
I first heard about this game a month or two ago. It looked like WrestleFest. I liked WrestleFest. I played it in a bowling alley once as a kid. Then I played it on Mame when I first got the internet.
What a step down in terms of rosters. In WrestleFest, you had Hulk Hogan, Ultimate Warrior, Earthquake, Jake “The Snake” Roberts, “The Million Dollar Man” Ted DiBiase, Big Boss Man, Mr Perfect, Sgt Slaughter. The Road Warriors, and Demolition. These were the biggest names in the WWF in the early 1990s and therefore the biggest names in professional wrestling.
So who do we get for RetroMania? A bunch of guys who I’ve never fucking heard of, The Blue Meanie, Nikita Koloff, Tommy Dreamer, and the now deceased Road Warriors.
Aside from the zombie Road Warriors, none of these guys were main event wrestlers.
RetroMania got some kind of license from the National Wrestling Alliance. Do these wrestlers who I’ve never heard of work for NWA? Or even the wrestlers who I have heard of? I have no idea. NWA is maybe the fourth biggest wrestling organisation in the US. Maybe not even that high. Nobody watches that. Do they even have a show?
Yeah. NWA Power. It’s on FITE TV. Oh yeah, I’m always watching FITE TV.
Oh right. It seems that some of these guys I never heard of do wrestle for NWA. Even Tommy Dreamer worked for them. So I guess that all of these guys have some link to NWA. With the zombie Road Warriors, that link is from like fifty years ago. It’s a completely different organisation now, just using the same name. I think that Billy Corgan owns the company.
Now that I know that all of these guys wrestle or have some kind of affiliation with NWA, it makes more sense but still. What a climbdown. How much demand is there for an NWA game? I almost wonder if a “Youtuber” wrestling game would have fared better.
And WrestleFest was a very simplistic game. Just a button masher. Maybe RetroMania is a little more complex. Riggs did say that it was kind of like Fire Pro.
Anyway, I’m not interested. It’s not even because of the NWA license. If anything, I’m intrigued now that I looked into it. But the game looks simplistic. And it’s claim to be a sequel to WresteFest is preposterous. None of the same people worked on the game. All of the people who worked on WrestleFest are retired or dead. The company who made WrestleFest (Technos) is long gone.
It’s all tenuous crap: the NWA licence, the alleged sequel…fuck it. Too much dubious stuff for me.
I mean, they were making a Youtuber wrestling game. Then they slapped an NWA licence on top of it. Then they got permission to make this an “official” sequel from whoever owns the intellectual property of Technos. Probably some guy in his parents’ basement in Japan. I mean, who gives a fuck?
This is a “Youtuber” wrestling game with a last second paint job. Not interested. And the fact that John Riggs is in it, in any capacity, seals it for me.