Gamer Girls

This is gold. Look at the state of the American higher education system. ZAP CRISTAL is giving a lecture.

0:00 – The “professor” is like 400 pounds. A 300 pounds man(?) in a flannel shirt and mask walks past. It might be a woman but I couldn’t notice any tits. The confusion comes in because they have long hair styled like a woman. A 300 pound woman drinking a sugary beverage walks past.

While this is all going on, this 400 pound “professor” is hyping Zap’s Youtube channel and her GOD AWFUL podcast with Mr Wright Way II. And there’s somebody signing this. Like for deaf people. Sign language. That woman is getting paid quite a bit of money. For this. For weird, creepy, mentally ill ZAP CRISTAL to give a speech. ON WHAT? How to avoid finding actual employment? How to marry black men?

0:45 – Then she starts with “Thank you, appreciate it. Thank you, appreciate it” like she’s Elvis Presley. But Elvis had a job. He was a singer. He was an actor. He was making money.

Then she starts in proper. “So we as human beings create memories through different media forms and different forms of entertainment.”

IT MEANS NOTHING! This is some total bullshit that she came up to try to sound important and intellectual for this community college class. Does she give the name of the college? Yeah. Tarant County College. Let me look this up. Shame these people.

Open admission, meaning that they take anyone. They don’t require SATs or ACTs. “This means any person can be admitted, regardless of their educational background.”

This is straight from their own website. It’s a community college according to Wikipedia.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarrant_County_College

1:15 – “To give you more context of who I am, at the present time I have a channel called Zap Cristal.”

She stressed “at the present time” like this is some deep comment. Like in the future, she’s going to be something greater than she is. No. You’re going to be less. Less than whatever the fuck you already are.

2:00 – “Ms Pac-Man made a big impact on my life because Ms Pac-Man was the very first female character in a video game.”

This is fucking…I’m not getting too much further into this one. It’s a joke. I can comment on every fucking sentence. This is an abomination. The whole fucking video is cringe. And did I mention the music? Mr Wright Way II insisted that his music be played over this video, just like he does with the podcast. It fucking kills the videos.

She has long hair, inexplicably. It’s a wig.

2:30 – “My dad was all about breaking traditions. Just revolutionising everything.”

By letting her play video games. Yeah. This guy is right up there with Che Guevara and Vladimir Lenin. What a hero to the working class Zap Cristal’s father was. He let her play Ms Pac-Man. Watch out, fat cat capitalists.

3:15 – There’s a guy in a yellow shirt in the front row. I’ve skimmed through the video and at some point, he leaves. He must have got fed up with this horseshit.

3:30 – She says she “impacted” by some hurricane in Puerto Rico so God told her to go play video games. I am not making this up. She talks about a spiritual awakening where GOD HIMSELF told her to go play video games during the aftermath of that hurricane.

Why is everybody not walking out at this point? This is a complete fucking nutjob.

She brought a Wii U home and wanted to introduce her five year old son to “the traditions that I had.” Video games as a tradition. Oh my fucking god. Get the fuck out of here. This is humiliating. She’s a fucking moron.

4:30 – She says that she came to Texas as a “foreigner.” She’s from Puerto Rico.

I was reading an article recently about the police in mainland USA arresting somebody from Puerto Rico because he thought that Puerto Ricans didn’t have the right to be here. They do. They’re free to move here. Don’t need visas or anything. And an American is free to move to Puerto Rico. Puerto Ricans are American citizens and have been since 1917.

So how was she a foreigner? She’s just perpetuating dangerous misinformation about her own fucking birthplace.

4:45 – She’s talking about how she started her Youtube channel in like 2018 and at that time, people were discriminating against “female” “gamers”. 2018. Let’s just move on. I don’t want to get into this bullshit.

5:15 – “What video game have you played that has helped you through hardships, that has navigated you through dark times?”

NONE, YOU FUCKING RETARD. I don’t use video games for therapy because I’m a normal-functioning human being.

But this is the theisis of her lecture. She’s going to talk about her “healing journey through video games.” She made a video about this before. It’s fucking pathetic.

“Gee, I was going to jump off of a tall building but then I played Tetris.”

I’m done with this shit. I’ve already heard the rest of this. She’s just talking about games that saved her life. She’s done a video on this. It was as pointless and absurd then as it is now. But now she’s giving this speech to the disadvantaged youth of rural Texas. This is shameful. She should be ashamed of herself. The administrators should be ashamed of themselves. The “professor” should be ashamed of himself. Anyone who had any involvement in this should be ashamed of themselves.

Let me just check when that guy left the room.

32:15 – She’s giving some pretentious talk about her “creative” process in making these Youtube videos. These Youtube videos that NOBODY WATCHES. So that guy in the yellow shirt whispers something to the guy next to him and then leaves. He probably said, “Fuck this. I’m going to go smoke a bowl. See you at the hackysack tournament at the quad later.”

It reminds me of my own college days. Not the activities but the leaving lessons after attendance was taken.

37:30 – She ends the lecture by talking about what a musical prodigy her 14 year old son is. He must be absolutely humiliated by all of this.

38:15 – Then everyone just starts leaving. She’s in mid-sentence and they just get up and leave. She says, “Anyone else have questions?” but fuck it. They’re done. They’ve sat through this bullshit for 38 minutes and they’re done with it. Fuck you. We have classes to get to. Real classes. Not listenening to this pointless horseshit about your son and how some indie game saved you from killing yourself.

She ends by thanking “Dr” Johansen Quijano, who was the 400 pound “professor” we saw at the beginning. Let me see what this guy’s doctorate is in. I’m thinking he’s like a radio dj “love doctor”. He has a PhD in sexing you up.

https://www.ratemyprofessors.com/professor/1492891

“Super easy professor. I took this class online and he was an extremely easy grader as long as you follow the rubric and do the discussions.”

I can’t believe that RateMyProfessors still exists. But most of the comments are like the above. They say that he’s an easy grader and you don’t even have to show up for class to pass.

https://www.uta.edu/academics/faculty/profile?username=quijano

Well, he does seem to have qualifications. Three degrees in Puerto Rico and a doctorate in English from The University of Texas.

Why didn’t this guy stand up when she was talking about being a “foreigner” in the US? Probably because he physically couldn’t stand up. I’m sure that he was outraged but just couldn’t stand up under his own power.