Alright, Erin and Mike. What do you got? What spooky Halloween game is next?
Oh, that was Mike’s question as well.
Mike: What video game to play now?
Erin: I got a new cup, though. Look. It’s pretty. So for Halloween they had like purple and they also had a green and an orange one.
Erin was unable to answer the question so she just started talking about colours, perhaps her only true passion. “What game do you want to play next?” How is she possibly going to answer that, Mike? You know even more than I do that Erin has NO INTEREST and NO KNOWLEDGE about video games. You live with this parasite. You see that she never plays games. You hear her totally ignorant comments about video games all day long. How could you possibly expect her to name a spooky NES game that she wants to play? SHE DOESN’T KNOW ANY!
So colours. You guys like hues, right? Orange. Red. Green. All good choices.
She’s a moron and a fraud.
Then she starts talking about how she doesn’t care much for Starbucks coffee. So don’t go.
Maybe Erin should apply for a job at Starbucks. It would certainly pay more than what she’s getting from Youtube and Twitch. WAY more. Folding money. Plus, you can probably get some free doughnuts and whatever every day. I don’t mean stealing them but a good manager lets the employees have whatever stuff is left over at the end of the day. Let me look this up. It surely varies by store but let’s see what sort of perks Starbucks employees get.
It seems that you can get free drinks before and after your shift. “Partner drinks” they call them. Cringe as fuck to call your employees “partners”.
Another thread says that you get a free drink and food item each day. Yeah, this is normal. You get a free lunch when you work at these places.
Anyway, back to colours.
37:30 – “He says he was playing Family Feud on NES. Oh, that’s cool. We like to play…uhhh…the ummm…I can’t talk.”
More lies from super retro game enthusiast Erin Plays. She’s all about Family Feud on the NES. Ricky Lawson. Jay Crumb. She loves that show. Watches it all the time. It’s her favourite.
“I hope you had fun at Portland. I wanted to go but it didn’t work out this year.”
Yeah, she also tweeted about this. She tweeted about how did she didn’t go to the Portland Retro…something. Some nerd convention. It was her fifth consecutive year of not attending. I talk about this complete non-event here:
Erin is the Cal Ripkin Jr of not doing shit. She’s gone 35 consecutive years of not doing anything. Keep that streak going, Erin. You’re doing great.
37:45 – “So anyway, what are we playing?”
Well, that was the original question, Erin. Mike wants to know what YOU want to play. He’s being polite. It’s your stream. YOU pick the games.
So she just starts reading from the chat. The horntards are always there to help fill in the gaps of Erin’s memory. She “always” “forgets” what game she wants to play.
Nightmare of Elm Street. Family Feud. These are really great choices. And Erin says that she hasn’t played Nightmare on Elm Street in a while. Yeah. Not since that stream that she did a year ago or whenever.
They decide on Monster in My Pocket. Then Erin says, “Then maybe after that we can do Concentration…Classic Concentration.”
Mike gives her a quizzical look. What the fuck does Concentration have to do with Halloween?
And do you know who calls this game “Classic Concentration”? NOBODY. The game show was just called “Concentration”. But Erin uses the official title because she doesn’t know jack shit about the game show or the NES video game based on said game show.
Yes, when they did the intro for the show they would call it “Classic Concentration”. This was, I guess, to indicate that it was closely replicating the gameplay of the original game show, which ran from 1958 to 1978, according to Wikipedia. But that original game was just called Concentration. And in the 1980s remake, Alex Trebec (the host) and everybody else just called the game “Concentration”. NOBODY called it “Classic Concentration”.
Certainly, when I was sitting at home sick from school or in the summer or whatever, I never said, “Hey, Classic Concentration is on. I love that show.” I called it “Concentration” like a normal human being.
But Erin doesn’t know anything about this shit. She might have seen one episode. Under duress. The show was cancelled before she was born. But now suddenly she’s an expert. She’s all about “Classic Concentration”.
40:00 – She’s reading from the chat.
Erin: Target of Dollar Tree for my Halloween decorations? It’s a combination of vintage…some of it’s Target.
Mike: Dollar Tree? This is from the 1950s.
Erin: You’re from the 50s.
Negative charisma from Erin.
41:00 – “I haven’t played this in a while.”
We know, Erin. Whenever you played this on stream, for money, that’s when you last played it.
41:30 – “I forget there’s a double jump.”
Erin “always” “forgets” that there’s a double jump in Monster in My Pocket. Probably because she no experience playing the fucking game.
41:00 – “Oh my god. Is he wearing like sandals or flipflops or house slippers?”
Nobody gives a shit.
And while she was saying that negative charisma bullshit, Mike was trying to talk about whether or not the sprite looks like him. She basically ignored it because she doesn’t know what to say. She’s incapable of having a conversation.
43:45 – “Do I have another attack? I don’t remember.”
Eugh.
45:45 – Erin couldn’t “remember” the name of a game that she did a recent video on. So, of course, the horntards remind her. “Yes, Harley’s Humongous Adventure. Thank you. I totally forgot.”
Uh huh. “Forgot”.
She has NO IDEA how to play this game, by the way. Worst Monster in My Pocket footage ever recorded. And she says that she likes the game. It doesn’t show from the gameplay. She just going around in circles. On a LINEAR platformer.
46:30 – So then she goes around the level a second time and says, “What am I missing?”
Did you “forget” how to play the game, Erin? This is level 2. You “forgot” how to finish level 2?
“I think I’m missing something because this is the second time I’ve gone up here.”
And she tries to go down a coffee cup like it’s a pipe in Mario. What a…how can she “forget”? And she “forgot” that the cups in this game don’t work like warp pipes in Super Mario Bros?
46:45 – “I keep going in circles. I don’t know where to go. I don’t know how to progress.”
Indeed. She “forgot” everything about this game. Level 2. She can’t “remember” how level 2 works.
47:00 – You know what she had to do? Jump in the right spot. That’s it. She missed an obvious her first time. Erin “always” “forgets” the obvious jumps.
49:00 – Erin pronounces “schtick” as “stick”.
She’s a big Yiddish fan.
49:45 – I think that Mike starts petting a cat off-camera. What is this? They have a cat? Why wouldn’t they mention this? Why wouldn’t they show the fucking cat?
Yeah, it must be. Because he’s bending over and saying, “You’re so good.” He’s either talking to a cat or his own penis.
Why they haven’t shown this cat or ever talked about it before, I have absolutely no fucking idea.
Then Erin says, “Twitch kitty.”
CAN WE SEE THE FUCKING CAT? This is ridiculous. This is how you get views. You show the fucking cat.
What if there is no cat and this is all just some kind of a joke? They’re pretending that a cat is in the room but there’s no cat.
50:15 – “Oh, he’s shooting me with things.”
Erin “always” “forgets” that the level 3 boss shoots things.
50:45 – Mike goes to feed the cat and Erin reads from the chat. “Remember Barbie on the NES? Yeah…that game. Eugh. That’s the most…that’s the most fucking bizarre game. Oh. The really fucked up one is the version on Gameboy? I…what did I do recently where I talk about it? But I could do like — I talked about — what — oh my god. What video was it? Was it Ocean? No, not Ocean. Mmm…Hi-Tech.”
Erin “always” “forgets”…everything.
51:30 – So then Mike returns with a green hat and no cat.
Has she mentioned this fucking cat on Twitter? No. Not that I’m seeing. Why wouldn’t she post pictures of the cat? I mean, I don’t give a fuck. I’m not looking for cat pictures. But people who get cats tend to post pictures of them. Especially people who are big time Youtubers, for example.
No cat.
Erin: That’s the wrong holiday, Mike.
Mike: No, this is my Halloween costume.
Erin: Oh. Are you a leprechaun? Did you get Lucky Charms? I want Lucky Charms.
Mike: I’m Milligan.
Erin: (clueless) Cool. But where’s the charms?
Mike: Aren’t I charming?
Erin: Hahahaha.
Mike: Those are the charms. Ha dash ha.
Erin: (in nerd voice) Erin’s not impressed with Mike’s stupid jokes. She hates it.
I don’t know if this is a reference to Erin thinking that I would write about this or not. Because I wasn’t even going to before she said that.
But what I find interesting that Erin didn’t know who Milligan is. I didn’t either but then I looked it up.
https://disney.fandom.com/wiki/Milligan_Wetherall
It’s from a recent Disney show called The Mysterious Benedict Society. Erin isn’t watching that? Mike is obviously watching it. Why isn’t Erin? Erin is all about Disney.
57:00 – Mike doesn’t want to play any more so they turn the game off. We can stop here. Still an hour of fun to be had here.