Full Length Movies Playing on the 2600? It is Now Possible! – John Hancock

Look at that gay fucking thumbnail. Does this guy have no shame?

I know of John Hancock but I’ve never watched his videos. I know that there’s some alleged scam museum that he has in his house and he solicits “donations” for. That guy DariusTruxton used to talk about John Hancock a lot. And 8 Bit Eric. That’s another guy whose videos I don’t watch.

DariusTruxton was amusing, I watched his videos, but he kept getting banned for calling people gay or making anti-“trans” comments or…something. His channel was similar to the blog. He had a handful of “Youtubers” who he didn’t like and he would talk about their videos and whatnot. Unfortunately, you can’t do that on these corporate platforms.

So he went to BitChute or something and of course nobody followed. It never works. Screenwave tried to make the Cinemassacre website popular again by releasing Monster Madness videos exclusively there for one year. That failed. Or you look at Joe Rogan moving to Spotify or whatever. I stopped watching after that and I don’t think I’m alone in this. He surely lost millions of viewers/listeners.

He’s apparently still on there but rarely posts. I laughed the whole way through this one. He’s talking about 8BitEric being gay. The phrase “touching tips” keeps coming up. I don’t know who 8Bit Eric is but this is one of the guys who Newt showed his penis to (the other being Joe from Game Sack) so yeah, he’s almost certainly gay.

I’ve seen it loads of times. Somebody gets upset with Youtube for whatever reason and moves to DailyMotion or something. It’s the end of the channel. If people aren’t moving to listen to Joe Rogan, what chance do you have?

Let’s look at my CinemassacreTruth sub-reddit statistics.

I get about 400 views a day on average. Actually, that’s not far from what I get on the blog. But the sub-reddit definitely gets more views. And for what? All I do is post there once every couple of days suggesting that the people on TheCinemassacreTruth are gay. It’s not particularly interesting “content”. But it gets more views than the blog because it’s backed by Reddit and people just want to stay on Reddit and there’s also the built-in audience already. You have to seek the blog out.

Anyway, we have to watch this fucking video. It just appeared in my “recommended” list because I recently watched a video about this “watching movies on your Atari 2600” thing. So now I’m doomed to be “recommended” this shit every time some buffoon makes a video about this.

0:00 – “I am fascinated by the capabilities of the original Atari 2600 hardware.”

Oh, do tell. What exactly makes it fascinating?

Then he shows you how to install this product into an Atari 2600 cartridge. You don’t get an assembled cartridge. You only get the board. You have to supply your own cartridge.

By the way, there’s no particular need for this assembly portion of the video but he’s doing this because he desperately wants to make the video 10 minutes long. It’s 10 minutes and 1 second.

4:15 – He puts the cart into the system and the video plays in really, really, really low resolution. I can appreciate the novelty value of this but obviously nobody in their right mind would ever watch a movie like this.

9:45 – He fillibusters trying to get to the ten minute mark and then ends with, “You people are wonderful and beautiful. Let’s keep it positive.”

Go fuck yourself. I hate this hippie bullshit. “Let’s keep it real.” That’s something that I can get behind. The homeys get it. Call out shit for being shit and praise good stuff for being good. But don’t praise shit just for the sake of it.

Thinking back to when the Atari 2600 was current…would this thing be possible? I’m thinking no. Because they talk about how you have to encode the videos. This encoding software surely wasn’t available then and would be technologically super-advanced.

But let’s say that it was possible to get a movie on a cartridge and watch it on your Atari 2600. Would anyone want this? Look at the quality of it. You’re going to watch fucking ET like this?

VCRs existed. They were probably like $1000 but the Atari was what? $200? Even if the prices of the cartridges were, say, $50 instead of the $100 that VHS movies might have cost at the time, look at the difference in quality. You can watch a clear version of the movie with your VCR or this pixelated mess on your Atari.

I can’t see the appeal. Maybe for porn? You want something really cheap and you can’t afford a VCR so you get this. But you’re going to look at pixelated tits? Well, plenty of people watched scrambled porn on the Spice channel, I guess. This would possibly be an improvement over scrambled porn. And also, scrambled porn came later. I’m thinking like 1980 is when the hypothetical consumer would be able to watch movies on their Atari. No Spice Channel in those days.

If you wanted to watch porn you had to, I don’t know, go to a seedy porn theatre that was probably full of gay men. That’s how porn theatre became later, anyway. Were they also like that in 1980? I don’t know. I mean, I think that they played porn movies in normal theatres in the mid to late 70s, maybe.

Or you could get a projector and film strips. I don’t know how readily available these were or how expensive they were. I don’t know anybody who had these things. Then there’s still the issue of having to acquire the movies.

So maybe pornographic movies played on your Atari could have been a niche that people would have taken up, basically just because of the expense of the alternatives and the ability to watch in your own home. But would anybody be satisfied with the quality of the image, even at a relatively low price?

I don’t know. It’s an interesting question. Because it’s basically a movie of shitty quality or a Playboy magazine. The movie might well be an improvement.

And also, the audio didn’t seem to be compromised. So there’s that. You’re looking at the heavily pixelated tits or Kay Parker or whoever but you can still hear her moaning clear as day. So it’s something.

But would somebody want to watch mainstream movies on their Atari? I don’t think so. With all of the free movies available on tv, in decent quality? And if there’s something new that you want to see, you can go to the cinema. You’re not going to watch a mainstream movie for 90 minutes on that thing. Porn for ten minutes, squinting, imagining what the woman looks like, yeah, I can see that.

So if this product existed in 1980, which I don’t think it could have, I’m saying it would have been a footnote in pornographic history for that brief period when VCRs were still too expensive for the average consumer but a lot of homes had an Atari 2600. I’m thinking that VCRs become affordable in about 1986, at which point this whole Atari porn fad would have died.

1 thought on “Full Length Movies Playing on the 2600? It is Now Possible! – John Hancock

  1. I liked Darius. He was hilarious he knew how to piss people off. He has his own garbage stabber who keeps taking his channel down. Then he moved to shit shoot and only does 5 hour live stream plays. Fuck that. Sorry but 15 minutes of calling someone a retard or a faggot is the perfect amount of time. Ate Shit Eric. Fuck him! Nobody likes that asshole and it is a mystery how he has 85,000 subscribers but almost no videos with 1,000 views. But yeah touching tips. It makes me vomit just typing it. This open homosexual JKB, I have no idea, made him do it. He said it wasn’t sexual and just a dare. Yeah right. Go up to any woman and say let me touch your pussy with my cock for 1 second. It’ll be funny like a dare. She’d say fuck no and that’s because it’s sexual! Retards. It seems like there is a strong anti-shit gaming YouTuber movement that has its share of people but these channels get so offended and they have zombie simp cuck incel fans who will go as far as suicide bombing somewhere if asked and so the movement goes nowhere except when it goes into criminal territory like the completionist hopefully going to jail.

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