You guys all like Air Fortress, right? Erin is a big fan. She’s dumped hundreds of hours into this thing over the years. So let’s check it out.
0:00 – “I am excited. This is a random one.”
What? I’ve been mislead. Isn’t Erin a retro gamer?
0:15 – “A few streams ago, when Mike and I did an NES variety stream, someone kept suggesting Air Fortress.”
Everything had to be on stream, for money, with this fraud.
0:45 – She says that she’s using a turbo controller and says that she has to or else “My hands will be destroyed.”
Shout out to her fake carpal tunnel syndrome. Whatever happened with that. YEARS ago, she promised on Twitter that she would reveal the results of her latest carpal tunnel test. We never got them. She was wearing wrist braces. She was regularly doing hand stretches during the stream. She always ended the stream pretty quickly and cited hand pain as the reason.
Now she’s back to doing streams for hours at a time. And it’s been like this for at least a year. What happened? Did she get some miracle cure?
Also, remember the reason why Erin says that she developed carpal tunnel. It’s from being on her phone too much. That’s what she said. What is anybody possibly doing on their phone that would give them carpal tunnel syndrome?
It’s all lies. Everything that she says is a lie.
Strokes t-shirt, by the way. You guys all like The Strokes, right? It’s one of Erin’s two bands that she mentions constantly, the other being Weezer.
This is the worst Air Fortress footage ever recorded, by the way.
3:00 – She’s reading from the chat. “‘I’ve played way too many NES games’. Me too! Isn’t it fun, though?”
It is so beyond disingenuous. How do these retards not see this?
3:30 – “See how it says ‘B’ in the upper left corner? I don’t know what that means exactly.
My guess: “Bombs”. What a fucking dumb bitch.
“I would say ‘bombs’ but they don’t really seem like bombs.”
I wonder if ShiShi still goes to the streams. I haven’t seen any mention of him in a long time. Of course, I haven’t been watching Erin’s streams in a long time. Not since she started with the A-Z bullshit. There’s a limit to how much shit I’ll watch. That whole “A-Z” shit was it for me.
6:45 – “He reminds me of the Cheesasurus Rex. He looks like that. He looks like the macaroni and cheese colour.”
You guys all know the Cheeseasaurus Rex, right?
Eugh. Let’s look this painfully unfunny “X looks like Y” “joke” up.
“The Cheeseasaurus Rex’s theme song is ‘I’m stroking my dick rn, I got lotion on my dick rn.'”
https://cartoon-characters.fandom.com/wiki/Cheesasaurus_Rex
Umm. I’m thinking that the moderators of the Cartoon-Characters Fandom aren’t monitoring the site too closely. There are a lot of questionable claims on that site including that he ran for president in 2016 and engaged in numerous instances of sexual assault.
It was obviously written by a kid but why the lotion reference to masturbation? I think that the days of Americans getting circumcised are long gone. Let me look this up…eugh…carefully.
https://www.cdc.gov/nchs/data/hestat/circumcision_2013/circumcision_2013.htm
It says that 64.9% of boys born in 1981 in the US were circumcised and 55.4% in 2007. Could that possibly be right? I’d say 90% in 1981 and maybe 30% in 2007.
They show a graph and it hasn’t really changed much. A 10% difference.
Well, anyway, I’m sceptical of this Cheesasurus Rex biography. Back to the total bore that is Erin Plays.
8:15 – Erin describes, what are clearly asteroids, as “Giant clusters of powdered cheese.”
Classic “X looks like Y” comedy from this personality blackhole.
At the risk of doing my own “X looks likeY” routine, the enemies remind me of the enemies from Thexder. That was a great game. The DOS version, anyway. Very challenging. I played it for years before I managed to beat it.
10:15 – “Hey Sergio. I’m good, how are you?”
Well, it seems that Sergio still goes to the streams. And he’s still asking that same god damned pointless question and getting the same pointless reply. SHE’S GOOD, SERGIO. ANY OTHER QUESTIONS?
Fucking retard is probably still inviting Erin to come to Argentina or where ever it is that he lives. She’s not coming, Sergio. She’s not interested in the retards who go to her streams. Mike is paying her so she’s staying with Mike for the time being. Can you afford to pay her more than Mike is paying? If so, you might have a chance, but you have to say something more than “How are you?” Try, “Hey, I have a lot of money. Why don’t you move in with me?” That might work. That line apparently worked for Mike.
13:15 – “You’re playing NES Blaster Master? That’s cool.”
That’s BORING, Erin. YOU’RE BORING!
Anyone else would have given their opinion on Blaster Master or an ancedote about the game. Erin didn’t but she can’t. She doesn’t know anything about the game. So everything is just, “That’s cool.”
13:45 – “Hey Super Geoff. What’s up?”
Here’s another retard who always goes to Erin’s streams. He posts a lot on Destiny Fomo’s Twitter too. Presumably goes to Whore Fomo’s streams.
14:00 – “WolfMaster says great game. I finally beat it a couple of years ago. That’s cool.”
I can’t understand why anybody watches this trash. She’s terrible at the games, she’s terrible at interacting with human beings, she can’t talk, she has nothing to say, she doesn’t know anything, and she’s not much to look at. What’s the appeal? Erin fails on every level.
17:45 – Erin dies. She clearly had NO IDEA where her energy meter was. She doesn’t know how the game works.
19:00 – Erin puts her blanket on. Hot.
I’m going to take a nap. This is boring the shit out of me. I’ll see how I feel when I wake up, whether or not I want to continue with this torture.
No, I’m done with this shit.
- “Why do you stream? Maybe you should just leave it up to mike, not trying to be mean, I like you both, just doesnt seem like you enjoy it.”
Then the same guy leaves another message.
- “Do make up streams erin!!! You would be amazing You look amazing! playing video games is not your passion, find your passion!”
Even the horny retards watching this shit can see that Erin has no interest in any of this.