He shit out another script. This one is called “Scissors”. It’s about sexy lesbians who kill people. Just in time for Pride Month.
He only gives the title page. Come on, Newt. I’m not going to steal your idea. I’m not Newt Wallen over here. Give us some sample pages.
Newt describes it as, “This is a queer centric giallo inspired flick”.
I don’t know what that means but this is all of his scripts. He describes all of his scripts as “(Film A) combined with (Film B)”. We don’t want that, Newt. That’s derivative. Don’t you get it? Just come up with an entirely new film, Film C.
Now I have to look up this fucking Jello shit.
It means “tits and gore”. I’m not even joking. “A genre of murder mystery fiction that often contains slasher, thriller, psychological horror, sexploitation, and, less frequently, supernatural horror elements.”
So that was boring as fuck. What else do you have, Ideas Man?
Indeed, Newt. 10,800 is close to 11,000. That all important milestone of 11,000. Keep counting those numbers.
Wait…what? This is still about that Scissors script, I think. How is this outside of what he usually does? The ONLY thing he seems to do is completely unoriginal tits and gore movies and then he puts a shitty pun title on it. Actually, that’s the reverse of his “creative” process. He STARTS with the shitty pun title and then builds a movie script around the title.
Newt CONSTANTLY talks about celebrities dying. I’ve already skipped a couple of recent ones that he did. But yeah, Pat Robertson. I don’t know anything about him. Why not? He wasn’t in my orbit. I wasn’t watching whatever that weird religious channel was. Was Newt watching it? He was watching The 700 Club?
I’m looking at the “controversies” section on Pat Robertson’s Wikipedia and I’m not seeing anything too controversial. He didn’t care much for Hinduism, Buddhism, or Islam. That’s understandable given his beliefs. I mean, if you genuinely believe that the only path to salvation is following the teachings of Jesus of Nazareth then it follows that you wouldn’t care much for religions that don’t espouse this belief.
He had the normal Christian views of feminism, homosexuality, and abortion. Nothing odd about any of that. We can all read the Bible for ourselves and see the relevant passages.
He suggests that certain natural disasters were the result of God’s wrath. Again, read the fucking Bible and you’ll see that God did this kind of shit. It’s not surprising that somebody who believes what’s written in the Bible would believe that God still behaves this way. Why would God change his view and such a relatively short span of time? He’s smiting people and calling down plagues and flooding the earth and whatnot 4,000 years ago or whatever but now God is just chill? God let’s people do whatever they want with no retribution? I don’t think so. Not if you follow the logic of the Bible, anyway.
So…it’s just different strokes for different folks. You don’t have to agree with him. But he’s perfectly entitled to voice these opinions. That’s what makes America so great, you liberal fascist piece of shit trying to silence people who have opinions different from your own.
Newt talks about more celebrities dying. He gives more meaningless Twitter stats. He retweets a picture of a woman with her breasts out.
Some gay man on Reddit posted something about Newt talking about a script deal that fell through. Where is that? He must have deleted it. So I’ll just copy and paste the pictures.
I don’t know what any of this means. He was offered some money to write and direct a movie and then the offer was rescinded because…something happened. Newt is light on the details but it’s something about taking somebody’s ideas and presenting them as his own. This is all that Newt ever does. He never comes up with anything even APPROACHING originality. It’s all based on existing movies or other people’s…whatever…scripts or movie reviews or whatever.
Maybe there was some kind of agreement here between Newt and the guy who he ripped off but that’s not my point. Why is EVERYTHING that Newt writes so blatantly derivative?
He’s basically writing PORN and yet it’s still derivative. Even his sexual fantasies are stolen. He’s so creatively bankrupt that he can’t even come up with a sexual situation that’s at all original.
What about this for an idea? A movie about a guy (“Nate”) who manages a cinema. And it starts showing his life, belittling and insulting his employees and what an asshole he is.
Then Nate goes home to his modest apartment and starts watching the news on tv. He’s astonished to see a zombie Pat Robertson has taken over the broadcast. Pat Robertson says that God himself has risen him from the dead. He says that he’s here to lead the righteous in the final battle against evil, as foretold in Revelation.
Pat Robertson says that Satan’s representatives in this apocolyptic battle are the Whore of Babylon, The Four Horsemen of the Apocolpyse, and the seven-headed red dragon who wears PVC bondage gear. It dawns on Nate that Pat Robertson is talking about Fallon, Crystal Quin (representing one of the horses), and PVC Bondage Guy. Obviously, you would introduce these characters in the beginning of the movie to make the reveal more impactful.
So Nate knows that he has no chance in joining the righteous what with his decadent lifestyle and overall poor choices in life. So he tries to get in with the forces of evil. But the Whore of Babylon, the Horse of the Apocolpyse, and PVC Bondage Dragon all say that they’ll only grant him protection if they agree to have sex with him. Nate is thinking, “Oh, great. I get to fuck a whore, a horse, and a dragon. I’m in.” But then the twist is revealed. Nate is going to be the female in this setup.
Now, is this going to win an Oscar? No. It’s pretty derivative. I’ve borrowed heavily from the Book of Revelation. But it beats a vampire with a shark’s head who fucks sexy ladies. And if I was getting paid or trying to get paid, I’d put much more time and effort into this.
I’d like to see your take on critical “Kate”
Willaert. I use Kate in quotes because his real name is not Kate. He is a man in a dress talking about video games. While that’s nothing uncommon these days, this guy Kate really loves talking about the first woman this and that in gaming. Like a feminist who gets excited about the first female airline pilot or whatever, except our boy Kate only cares about the first female protagonist, the first female developer, the first female pixel. It’s almost as if making such a big deal about girl power give you some kind of credit that will transform you from a man in a dress to a real woman.
There’s also the meltdown he had because he couldn’t get a job for some reason. Probably because he didn’t like doing actual work that wasn’t tweeting about “rights” or that anywhere he did work, he had to be called he because he is a he! Now his fan club pays him about $1400 a month to make these groundbreaking videos that make Bobdunga look like an Oscar winner by comparison. Except he, a man in a dress who calls himself Kate, hasn’t made any yet.
How did you even find this person? They have ten videos. This person is clearly mentally ill, though. They even put “asexual” and “autistic” on their Twitter profile. There’s no particular joy in insulting the mentally ill.
Kim Justice is another mentally ill transgender Youtuber and his videos are actually good. I would watch them if it weren’t for the fact that it’s some crazy fat guy in a dress and that makes the whole thing uncomfortable.
He made a video that made that rounds on gaming sites. Weirdly enough it was not on his channel. Anyway he and some other guy who is not pretending to be a woman, found the first female game developer that had a female in a game. Basically they stalked some woman and made a video about where she is. I understand the need to not dunk on the mentally ill but there are different levels and I’d say every person you cover is nuts in some way. If for nothing then by cranking out awful videos to become “famous.”
He’s facing new plagiarism accusations? Dude will never learn.
Maybe he should just try to become a porn director. That industry has lower standards and don’t care about shitty acting and writing as long as the sex scenes are good. And he’s fixated with nudity and sex already so seems like a good match. He can even make a porn parody if he has to base it on something existing.
That is a good idea and up his alley but he’d have to fund it himself. Nobody is going to pay for Newt Wallen to make a porn. And does Newt know much porn talent? I don’t think that Fallon talks to him any more. There’s PVC Bondage Guy but I don’t want to see her doing porn.
If he could get some “actors” together, he might be able to put something together. Write a little plot. But it’s just going to be a giant financial loss. Nobody is going to buy Newt’s porn, of course. He has no way to distribute it anyway. It would purely be a way for him to build whatever resume he hopes to build with porn. And the end product would be awful.
Im still waiting for “Sucks2Suck” and that shower scene that Newt had already “wrapped up”…Newt promised us fake-old Fallon Tits and hasn’t delivered…i think the few grand that the GoFundMe generated all went in her pockets so she’d continue to hang out with him. It dried up, long ago. So no Fallon tits, no shower scene, no Sucks2suck:(
The only thing he showed was the shower scene. Maybe that’s the whole movie. The whole movie takes place in the shower. It could be good. Some experimental art house type film.
Ha. It’s in black and white. Something else i was promised and was deprived of…i caaan’t quite remember the actual name of it, but it was a “spin-off” with Fallon and a, “fuller figured girl” i’ll say…they both appeared on Newt’s channel and were introduced as like, the “something-something” twins, i cant remember. But they were supposed to have their own “thing” and Newt was like “where can we find you?”….Them: “right here on Shlock and awe”…
I remember in the article you were equally as perplexed and made a funny comparison, its mostly drawing a blank though…all i know is i remember being ecstatic about this newfangled supergroup and it never materialized….they had one episode, the introduction….hopefully you remember what im talking about.
They were Haunted Attraction. The Twins name was just my made up name for Johanna and Horseface. Here’s the article:
https://gamergirlsblog.com/2022/12/28/lets-make-cookies-and-talk-about-black-christmas-newt-wallen/
Newt Wallen is a pathological liar and plagiarist.
NONE of these projects exist, except for in his mind.
Florida Man should really be out by now. This is just ridiculous. He said it would be out for last Christmas. He’s been promising this comic for over a year now.
His latest update on that comic:
https://twitter.com/stillnewtwallen/status/1669063993766322187
It is absolutely NEVER coming out, just like all his other “projects”.
It’s all lies and delusions of grandeur with Newt.
Ive been waiting to order some copies for the grandkids. Hopefully its out by Christmas.
Sucks2suck is the only real project he’s involved with. Can’t wait for your review….if it even comes out.