Crystal Quin and Johanna’s Fansly ‘Collab’

This is absolutely revolting. This is one of the most disgusting things that I’ve ever seen in my life.

I take absolutely no pleasure in saying this. I don’t want to say hurtful stuff. I don’t have any particular problem with Johanna. But fucking look at this. How could I let this pass without comment? It’s completely nauseating.

You have fucking Horseface there, showing off her jiggly arm fat. And she looks pretty stocky here. Big legs. Big stomach. The jiggly arm fat that I’ve already mentioned. This is not appealing. And then you have the fucking equine face.

And then you have Johanna and…oh my god. What? It’s like there’s a fucking truck driver sitting behind Horseface. She has all these bad tattoos and she’s fucking 300 pounds. COME ON. How could she POSSIBLY have thought that she could make money doing porn?

And then you go to the fucking comments, and Ian, who is Johanna’s husband or fiance, posts a “funny” gif saying, “That’s my wife.” Horseface replies with, “That might be your wife but she’s also my girlfriend.”

This is fucking disgusting. I don’t know where in the Greek alphabet Ian falls but he would really have to strive to reach beta. He might be somewhere around theta. I’m also pretty sure that he’s gay. He was on an episode of Hack the Movies and he kept talking about his fondness for musical theatre. He also had a gay voice.

This is…this is just awful all around. You have this fucking gay man marrying Johanna as some kind of a beard and then Horseface constantly having to talk about how “hot” Johanna is and how she’s her girlfriend. Despite the fact that Horseface is a heterosexual woman and Johanna isn’t hot and Johanna is married. TO A GAY MAN.

On behalf of the non-retarded community, let me tell you that we don’t want any of this. Get this shit off the fucking internet. I never want to see or hear anything from Horseface, Johanna, or her gay fucking husband ever again.

At the absolute minimum PUT SOME CLOTHES ON. None of these people are even REMOTELY hot. They’re not even presentable. And to pretend otherwise is offensive.

I know that people like different stuff. But show me the category on Pornhub for “horse-faced women.” Show me the category for “fat truck driving women.” It’s not there. NOBODY wants this.

The rest of the comments on that Twitter thread are basically just, “You go, girl” very muted kind of replies. Even Kris Glavin only said, “Horror queen goddesses”. He’s just trying to be polite like the rest of the people who left comments. Nobody on earth genuinely wants to see this. How could they possibly? It’s vile.

The most baffling thing about this is that everyone involved in this apparently have jobs. Horseface does “events”, whatever that means. She’s also a big time model, of course. The Paris runways are full of chubby, horse-faced women who are knocking on 40. Johanna presumably still works at Screenwave in the finance department. As far as I’m aware, her husband still sells Hyundais or Hondas or something. So why are they making the world’s worst pornography? For fucking pennies? There is NO WAY that they’re making any considerable amount of money with this.

There are so many jobs out there. There are so many different things that you can be doing with your life. Why this? Why would two women approaching 40, neither of whom are remotely attractive, decide on pornography as their next career venture? And not even legitimate pornography. Just this weird, scammy, lingerie shit to con literal retards out of pennies. It’s still just as embarassing as legitimate pornography. More embarassing, in fact. I’d have more respect for these women if they were doing actual pornography as opposed to this scam bullshit for retards. If you’re going to do porn, do it right.

Please for the love of Christ, stop all of this. How could they not be massively embarassed by this? How could Johanna go back to work the next day after these revolting pictures? MAYBE the people at Screenwave are unprofessional enough to be cool with this, but how is she going to get a job at any respectable organisation with these disgusting pictures out there?

I’m not saying this to be a prude. If these were some hot pictures of women with nice bodies, I would say whatever. You do you. But look at that fucking picture. Would you want people to see you in a “sexy” picture if you looked like that?

I’m focusing mainly on Johanna but the same applies to Horseface. She needs to stop her delusion that she’s some hot chick. She is not. AT ALL. I’m sorry. I hate to be the one to say this. But somebody has to. She doesn’t seem to be getting any slimmer and her face isn’t becoming any less horse-like.

It’s just people totally destroying their own lives. This seems to be a common theme with the people I write about.

4 thoughts on “Crystal Quin and Johanna’s Fansly ‘Collab’

  1. It’s just this constant need for attention. Horseface has daddy issues, fer sure. She’s also just a try-hard. Like, she is now online smoking cigars as a hobby. It will be something else “outrageous” or “wild” soon enough. “Look at me! LOOK. AT. ME!” It’s all very sad and pathetic, trying to cover up for their lack of any creative talent whatsoever.

    1. Women smoking cigars is a fetish for some people. I don’t get it but it’s well established. I assume that that’s what she’s doing this for. Just fetish content.

      I prefered when she was doing watch repair as a hobby. Just one day, she showed a picture of a bunch of watch parts and said that she repairs watches. But no further information was given and when people asked her to elaborate, she didn’t. Must have been trying to tap into the watch repair fetish market, I guess.

    2. “Guys I’m SO wacky. I stuck my tongue out in this selfie like I’m 13 years old! I’m discovering what it means to be me!”

      I’d be fucking embarrassed if my girl posted selfies like her. Thank god she mainly takes pics of our dog or scenery when hiking. Also when you’re actually happy with someone (or have someone period) you aren’t compelled to post pictures like that for attention constantly.

      It’s so obvious Horseface has approval issues because her family doesn’t like her that much. She knows it too. She plays it off like she annoys her sister and it’s “lol” etc, but no she like *actually* doesn’t like you. For real. She has to tolerate you. It’s basically forced since family, but you’re kidding yourself and tell people publicly because you know it’s how you’re actually viewed lol. That’s you nervously realizing it.

  2. I think their pics are meant to appeal to fat fetishists. Normal people find this revolting, but there is a niche group of people out there that love fat chicks.

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