0:00 – “How are my little ho ho ho’s doing?”
His audience is 99.5% men. And of that 99.5% figure, probably 25% of them are ladyboys. So…let’s just move on.
0:30 – “Is Die Hard a Christmas movie? I don’t know. I wish that Youtubers who ran out of ideas back in 2009 would talk about it online.”
He’s calling out James Rolfe. But with respect to the Ideas Man, Newt ran out of ideas at least as fast as James Rolfe did. Everything is fucking tits and gore. I’ve been watching Newt’s videos for a year and I’m fucking sick of them. LONG since sick of them.
I am not interested in these fucking movies. At all. And I never have been. I only watch because of Newt’s crazy get rich quick schemes and his endless pining for Horseface.
All of this bullshit with PVC Bondage Girl is just an attempt to make Horseface jealous. PVC Bondage Girl deserves better than that.
Newt is mentally ill and he surrounds himself with mentally ill people. So they all feed off their terrible ideas that are borne out of mental illness. “Yeah! Newt! You should go do that Shark Vampire movie. That sounds like a good thing to sink your life’s savings into.” It’s a self-destructive environment.
This aspect of Newt was interesting, albeit very sad. I don’t want to encourage this because he’s completely ruining his life with this shit, but that’s the reality on why I was watching: to see Newt’s latest hair-brained, plagiarised ideas that were all doomed to failure.
These movie reviews are awful. What Newt needs to do is quit all of this bullshit and go get a job. There’s nothing wrong with managing a movie theatre. Or if he doesn’t want to do that, go look for a different job. But not this Youtube bullshit, not writing, not being a big movie moviemaker. These things are not going to work. These things require skills that Newt does not possess.
11:15 – Newt is listing the reasons why he hates Christmas. Just more pity party bullshit. “My fiance left me on Christmas Eve, I lost another loved one on Christmas night, I had to fly across the country when I got broken up with by a girlfriend on Christmas Eve, I got my cancer diagnosis. All that kind of stuff.”
What’s the relevance? Some stuff happened around Christmas. Who cares? It has no relation to the holiday itself.
Reasons for not liking Christmas would be things like, “I don’t like the consumerism”, “I don’t like the gluttony”, “I don’t like how it’s become a secular holiday”, whatever. Things that actually related to the holiday. Not personal anecdotes. But everything has to be about Newt.
“I never have enough money to show people I love how much I love them by giving them monetary possessions.”
So get a job. And obviously, this is not the way to express one’s love for somebody, but this is Newt’s way. He enjoys paying women for their company. It’s the only way he’s able to relate to women.
Then he complains about having to work on Christmas. Who fucking cares? It’s irrelevant.
12:00 – “I’m going to try to get into the Christmas spirit this year.”
By doing what? And why? You’re a single man. If you’re not going to visit anyone, just treat it as another day.
My girlfriend has made comments like I should get a Christmas tree or decorate my home or whatever. For what? It’s just me living here. I’d be insane to decorate..
Am I going to cook a big turkey dinner for myself too? It’s ridiculous.
I don’t do anything for Christmas. It’s fine. This is what I want to do. If I wanted to visit my family or get another girlfriend, I’d do that. But I don’t.
Newt seems to be in a roughly similar situation but he’s wallowing in pity over this. Why? Do whatever you fucking want. If you want to visit your family, visit your family. If you want to get a girlfriend, get a girlfriend. If you want to sit at home and do nothing, sit at home and do nothing. There’s nothing wrong with any of these options.
14:00 – “Let’s be shameless hacks like everybody else on Youtube. It works out pretty well for them. Maybe I’ll just start laughing at everything because I’m too scared to not talk and not being the centre of attention for two seconds.”
Shout out to Tony from Hack the Movies.
Then he ends with “Happy Holiday”. Which holiday? We’re not sure. He’s suddenly afraid to say “Christmas”. Such is the insidious nature of this “Happy Holidays” campaign that swept the US in the 1980s and, apparently, continues to today. People don’t even realise how fucking stupid it sounds. It’s just become the normal phrase in the US, supplanting “Merry Christmas”.
Oh, here’s a long thread. I’ll embolden Newt’s responses.
- “Good for you taking shots at your former friends! I was at too many games in June, and one of them who won’t be named was talking a lot of crap about you and how, after faking your writing, you faked your breakdown! People were laughing, but one guy said “hey, he’s not here to defend himself” and they didn’t know what to say lol Keep going nuclear on those frauds!”
- “You are not 1st to tell me this. Did i make a mistake while working with them. 100 percent. I knew i was wrong. And I knew I should have checked to make sure things were rewritten. But I did not. And I could try an blame my facing of my molester that summer or Of my father taking me out of his will. Of the ticking clock trying to get my life in order before someone I loved got engaged. I could blame the many jobs I was doing covering for other peoples laziness or drunkenness I could say look at me. I got bells palsy from stress trying to hold it all together. Could say why did I have to write 26 scripts. Why did no one bother to check the work till they got caught. But im tired. I accept all my mistakes. I vow to never make them again. I should have said no. I should have said it was too much. But I wanted people to like me. And respect me. And I was wrong. But to joke about that breakdown. Ripples of which I still feel today. Well I hope that internet clouts worth it. I said my sorrys. I think about it everyday. But I let myself get used. And im trying to stop being a punchline.”
- “Good on you man! It was really distasteful and I don’t look at that person the same anymore when I see them online. It’s really sad to be the scapegoat in that situation and I can’t imagine how you must feel. Keep your head up though you’re on your way to having a great 2023! Cheers Newt!”
- “I learned a lot about all those people. And I look fwd to continuing to work with people who actually believe in me. And have my back. And I hope some of them realize what they lost out on by abandoning me. When I needed help. But who knows. And im no scapegoat. Like I said I should have said no. Or stop. Or checked the work.”
- “Glad to hear that too. It’s kinda sad when it gets me thinking of a whole group turning their back on me. Makes me hope at least 1 or 2 of them still talk to you even if it’s “low key”. I assumed maybe a couple of them still do just because you only ever mention 1 or 2 of them by name anymore, while the rest of them you refuse to say their names in your videos lol”
- “not anymore no. But I have tried. And look im making new friends. Or trying to at age 41. And im still working on myself.”
- “wait crystal is getting engaged? To one of the slobs??”
- “not that im aware of. But im blocked by them all.”
- “…. It wasn’t Jimmy right? I know you said no names but that doesn’t seem like a Jimmy thing to do. Also yeah good on Newt for firing back.”
- “no he and I spoke last Christmas and ended our time in each others orbits on good terms. I explained why And made an appolgy for hurting his brand. I have no ill will. Mike too. He was always very kind and understanding.”
- “Sorry you had to go through all of that newt. Shit Fucking sucks. We gotta learn to push forward and live life the best we can!”
- “it was not all bad. We let things happen or do dumb things cause we think we have to. Or we are acared And sometimes works. Other times not so much. Im on diff path. I at least cant get blamed when next scandal breaks”
- “so true! I watch more of your content than I do the other channel”
- “I appreciate that. Im just trying to figure out how to make people smile. Or laugh or whatever with these. Sometimes i stick the landing. But I do em cause it gives me an excuse to talk to people like you”
- “I’m so happy you’re doing what you love! I’m so glad i discovered you because we have the same taste in movies unlike other people I’ve met. Keep doing what you’re doing and I’ll keep watching!”
- “im glad you found me too. Im very lucky to have some many cool weirdos in my orbit”
It’s just Newt feeling sorry for himself and talking about the most important person in the universe: himself.