Here we go. Episode 4 of the podcast that’s sweeping the globe: Point and Drink Adventure. It stars our two lovely and talented hosts: Pam aka CannotBeEntertaining and what’s her name…Pele or something. I talked about the inaugural episode here:
It’s absolutely abysmal. They’ve basically just stolen the format to The Cinemassacre Podcast. What’cha Drinkin’, What’cha Playin’, What’cha Watchin’. What’cha Talkin’ About, Mr D?
Nobody is watching this shit. Nobody is reading this article. That’s what I find so interesting about this stuff. Like sometimes Mike Matei will play an obscure romhack and he’ll regularly comment, “I might be the only person on earth who ever played this.”
Same thing with books, I guess. There are a lot of self-published out there that nobody is reading.
There’s just something about interesting about it. Somebody put work into something and…it’s basically for nothing. Because nobody is consuming whatever it is that they made. But by you watching it or playing it or reading it, it gives some tiny meaning to the thing. At least there’s one person out there who watched or read or played whatever it is that you did.
0:00 – Wait…what? This woman introduces herself as “Michelle”. I knew that it wasn’t Pele but…it’s Michelle? No. It was Petee. Was Petee just her screenname? Or is Petee her real name and Michelle her English name? Because I don’t think that people from the Philippines do that. I think it’s just a Chinese thing.
Whatever. She wants to go by Michelle. Fine.
0:15 – Then they start touching each other. Oh my god. This is so hot. My favourite lesbian couple touching each other.
They usually film these over Skype but they got together for this. They’re in Pam’s spinster apartment.
1:00 – Michelle says that she’s from Virginia. I just assumed that she was Canadian. But no. So she travelled from Virginia for this? That is some desperate shit. There aren’t any lesbians in Virginia who might be interested? Come on. Put an ad on Tinder and see who replies. I’m sure that you can find somebody more local.
They talk about bourbon in boring detail. I’m skipping ahead. Fortunately, everything is time-stamped because Pam is autistic.
9:30 – Barbarian. Some tits and gore movie. It starts with, literally, Pam and her lesbian friend here talking about how they live in constant fear of men murdering them.
Ladies. We get it. Men are awful. So you’re lesbians. That’s cool. Do your thing. Nobody gives a shit.
I’m skipping ahead.
12:30 – Bad Sisters. Uh huh. Let’s hear about this lesbian bullshit.
It’s about some sisters. One of the sisters is married to an “emotionally abusive” man. Uh huh. I can see why this appeals to Pam. Pam is all about man-hating media.
I wonder why this is such a common thing among lesbians. Gay men don’t really do this, do they? Gay men don’t seem to have a contempt for women. They’re just into guys. But for whatever reason, a lot of lesbians just really find men objectionable. And Pam is a textbook example of this.
Skipping ahead again. This is all unwatchable so far.
16:00 – Invasion of the Body Snatchers. This was Pele’s movie. Is Pele still alive, by the way? I mean the Brazilian soccer player.
He is. He’s 82 years old.
Eugh. I have to move on again. I’m sorry but this is boring as fuck. Neither one of these bulldykes has even an ounce of charisma.
19:15 – Magic Mike XXL? What the fuck is this?
Oh. It’s some movie about male strippers. And these two vagitarians describe themselves as “thirsty girls”.
I’m reminded of a gay man who I lived with who suggested to me and my roommate that we all watch pornography together some time. He had a DVD. The DVD was heterosexual porn. But we declined the offer because…you know…that’s gay.
So even though this movie is about sexy guys, it’s still two lesbians watching this. And the enjoyment comes not from the movie but from the fact they’re both, maybe, getting horny and it might lead to other stuff.
Then they say that they went to a “drag show”. More weird, emasculating, stuff that lesbians enjoy.
Skipping ahead again.
23:00 – Alaska Concert. Pele says, “Pam has opened me up to the world of Ru Paul’s Drag Race.”
So yeah, this is what Pam is into. Men who look like women. And not because she finds this sexually exciting in any kind of normal sense (as normal as possible, given the circumstances). But she likes men being emasculated. This is her thing because she really hates men. It’s obvious in everything that she says and does.
From what I can figure out, Alaska is a band or a single performer who’s transgender. And they went a concert for this group or whatever it is.
Moving on.
26:00 – Star Trek the Next Generation. What man-hating shit can she possibly say here? Was there an episode where Picard dressed as a woman? If there was, she’ll tell us.
Pele really likes Riker because he’s a “player”. Do people still say that? I don’t think so. Not in the past 20+ years. But Pele obviously isn’t keeping up with the times.
Pele also enjoys the episodes that deal with racism and similar social issues. Eugh. Great. What about Troi’s giant tits? No mention of those?
They talk about how sexy Picard is. Not even joking.
This is not what the show is about. But these fucking cretins are just watching this shit…let’s just move on. I don’t give a shit.
29:30 – Now they’re talking about video games that they’ve been playing. Even though Pele isn’t even interested in video games.
God. I don’t give the slightest of fucks. Let me skip straight to the end.
54:45 – Pam says that she’s going to play board games with Pele tonight. Uh huh. This is a typical date for lesbians, I guess.
So that’s the video. Terrible. Unwatchable, ladies. And the view numbers back me up.