https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1mENTaCH4qs
It’s Newt “The Ideas Man” Wallen and PVC Bondage Girl. They’re in Newt’s kitchen again. It must be a different day from the previous video, though, because PVC Bondage Girl has her full god awful makeup on. Who is telling her that this looks good?
0:00 – There’s a weird filter…like you’re watching this through a camcorder’s…I don’t even know what this is replicating.
0:15 – Then after a few seconds of talking, it just abruptly ends and some title screen appears. What is this?
“So I was given an edible.”
Then PVC Bondage Girl starts laughing.
Newt continues, “That I did not expect to be as powerful as it was.”
PVC Bondage Girl obviously gave Newt the edible. Newt has said before that he’s never done drugs. Why would he start now as a 40 year old man? With this 25 year old woman in his kitchen? This is fucking pathetic.
Then PVC Bondage Girl says that the edible wasn’t from her. Then who was it? Why would Newt suddenly start taking edibles as a 40 year old man?
I’d get it if he’s trying to get something going with PVC Bondage Girl and PVC Bondage Girl is a drug addict (which she quite possibly is). But otherwise…why start? It’s not explained. Just somebody gave The Ideas Man an edible, we don’t know who, and here’s a review of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2.
0:30 – Then Newt called PVC Bondage Girl and said, “I don’t know what you’re doing but you need to get over here so we can talk about a movie.”
Newt really seems to have a close relationship with PVC Bondage Girl. She’s at his home at 4:00 in the morning. She’s making videos with him even though she hasn’t worked for him in three years.
Doesn’t Newt know that PVC Bondage Girl has a girlfriend? Why is PVC Bondage Girl going along with any of this? Why is she encouraging him?
If PVC Bondage Girl ISN’T interested in The Ideas Man in any kind of “romantic” way, she’s really giving off the wrong signals.
1:00 – PVC Bondage Girl says, “Yesterday, I was hanging out at work because my work is fun.” Then Newt smiles and nods to the camera.
What are we supposed to get out of this? Where does PVC Bondage Girl work? Newt seems to be suggesting that it’s somewhere sleazy. Maybe it’s just a movie theatre. Who knows?
Well, she says that she was playing a TMNT arcade game at work. So…probably not a strip club or something. That’s more of a movie theatre kind of thing.
1:45 – She just doxxed her own father. I don’t think that her father wants his full name being revealed. This is a professional man from all accounts. He’s a veterinarian. He doesn’t want people to know that PVC Bondage Girl is his daughter.
2:15 – “I know that there’s a chick with them named April with big tits.”
That was actually a PVC Bondage Girl comment. You might expect this sort of thing from Newt. But no. It’s PVC Bondage Girl talking about how she doesn’t know anything about TMNT.
2:45 – Then Newt says that there’s a porn star named April O’Neil.
Why would he say this? It’s just fucking endless.
3:30 – PVC Bondage Girl was cutting a brownie, or something, just a regular brownie according to her, and then she licks every single one of her fingers. How was she cutting this thing? I can see MAYBE licking the fingers on one hand. The hand that was touching the brownie. But the other hand was holding the knife. How does the the knife-holding hand get brownie on it?
In any event, does PVC Bondage Girl know that she’s being filmed? If so, maybe keep your fucking fingers out of your mouth.
Oh, and PVC Bondage Girl is wearing a dog collar and…just some black sleeveless top.
I’m at five minutes. Newt is summarising the movie and PVC Bondage Girl is eating something. A brownie, I guess. With a fork and knife. Why…let’s ignore the fact that she’s using a fork and knife to eat a brownie. WHY IS SHE EATING AT ALL? Put the fucking fork down for 20 minutes so you can do a fucking movie review in Newt’s kitchen.
Upon closer inspection of what PVC Bondage Girl is shovelling in her mouth, it’s not a brownie. Why is she eating? It’s distracting. And gross. And she’s clearly not paying attention to what Newt is saying. Newt knows all of this, and suggested in a not terribly subtle way that she shouldn’t be eating. But she’s eating.
6:15 – PVC Bondage Girl doesn’t understand why somebody in the movie is delivering pizza on a motorcycle.
Here’s an example of where getting out of rural Pennsylvania can enrich your life. In major cities like London or presumably New York, pizza is delivered by motorcycle or scooter or something. There’s a lot of traffic, it’s faster to do it this way. I don’t know. It’s just how it is.
There’s no reason why PVC Bondage Girl can’t take a trip to New York. Maybe order a pizza. See how things are done in other parts of the world.
I’m reading the comments because this is boring as fuck. Somebody says, “wtf is mets eating”. Newt replies, “Melted ice cream sandwich”
Yeah. It’s annoying. And gross. And rude.
By the way, it just dawned on me that PVC Bondage Girl HASN’T EVEN SEEN THE MOVIE! She’s just there to eat. She’s there to eat while Newt talks about the movie. What the fuck is the point of this?
Newt is intersplicing clips from the movie into this, by the way. He’s really upped the production value here.
18:45 – Newt starts talking about how amazing Eastman and Laird (or whoever), the creators of Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are. They didn’t have a company, they just wanted to make a comic book, et cetera.
Yeah. Here’s the difference between those two guys and Newt Wallen: those guys had an original idea. They didn’t just look for a public domain idea and rip it off.
21:15 – Newt teases a story he could tell about Screenwave but…doesn’t. I don’t even know what’s going on. I’m just waiting for the video to end.
22:30 – Newt says that he’s going to take more edibles next time and watch the third TMNT movie. Please don’t.
23:00 – Then Newt whispers that Dyke-alengelo should be PVC Bondage Girl’s ninja turtle name. She then says this out loud. Then the camera falls over and a “technical problems” screen appears.
Newt seems to think that he has all of these great parody names. Dyke-alengelo, for example. And the way he “makes movies” is to come up with a stupid pun title first and then he shits out a script in two days.
No. Newt. Listen. You have no talent for this. I’m sorry. You’re not funny and you can’t fucking write. You have ZERO ideas. That’s another big problem, Mr Ideas Man.
I’m sure that Newt has talents maybe it’s even something that he can make money from but writing and making movies are not among them. At all. These are the last things that he should be doing.
“Dyke-alengelo” is not funny. It’s stupid. It’s childish. It’s something that a ten year old would come up with. And all of his ideas are like this. Why doesn’t he get it? Why is nobody telling him to stop this fucking idiotic bullshit before you completely ruin your life? There is absolutely no chance of Newt EVER making ANY money from his fucking retarded, plagiarised movie ideas.
And as for this video, it might be the worst video that Newt ever made. And that’s no small achievement.
The very concept didn’t make sense. PVC Bondage Girl hasn’t even seen the movie. She’s just there…for what? To eat? She contributed NOTHING. How could she? Didn’t see the movie.
And the edibles didn’t add anything to this. This was just Newt summarising the fucking movie. Same way he does when not impaired. And constant sexual comments to PVC Bondage Girl, which, again, he does whether he’s sober or otherwise.
Another baffling move by The Ideas Man. Just get a job. All of your problems will be solved.