Gamer Girls

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WsY4gfFvdRU

0:00 – So we’ve got another bearded, vanilla nobody and…this woman.  She’s new.  And I’ve already watched some of the video and done some research on her.  Spoiler: Tony found another lunatic loser.

The guy’s name is Tom.  I don’t think that he has his own channel.  He’s described as “Tom from Hack the Movies” in the description.  And the only link they give for him is his Instagram.  Instagram.  Is he gay?  

He says that he’s a cameraman, or something, and there’s a picture of him in a onesie.  So that answers the “gay” question.  

Then we have Casey.  Casey sounds like she’s six years old.  That’s a big warning sign.  The first of many.

She describes herself as a “filmmaker and personal trainer.”

Uh huh.  What films have you made, Casey?  Let’s see if we can find out.

Here’s her Twitter:

https://twitter.com/TheFinalGirl__

Pinned tweet is a picture of her with a tight, pink shirt, she’s pushing her tits out, and the shirt says, “Pro life”.  She captions it, “You’d be amazed on how many hateful comments I’ve received from posting this photo on my IG. Idk how AbbyJohnson does it but I commend her for it”

Oh.  I see.  Warning sign number two.  

Maybe the issue wasn’t so much your belief that abortion should be outlawed so much as the crass way that you’ve expressed this view.  Are you able to have a discussion on matters like this or do you solely express yourself by purchasing girly t-shirts with your preferred slogan on them and then take pictures of yourself pushing your tits out and putting them on Instagram?  

She links to her website.

https://www.caseyhempel.com/

She describes herself as a writer, director, and princess.

Uh huh.  Warning sign number three.  Is there proof of ANY of this?  I’m more inclined to believe that she’s a princess than any of these other claims.

You click “meet Casey” and she answers this.

“The titles are true: I am a writer, director and princess. Not your typical princess who knows a variety of languages and travels the world, but I am my own kind of royalty. “

Uhhh…what?  She doesn’t even know what a princess is.  Do princesses tend to know “a variety of languages”?  Do they travel the world?  There are plenty of princesses who don’t meet either qualification but that’s not even what’s important here.  She doesn’t know what a princess is.  

It’s a hereditary title of a feudal noble who either usurped the title himself or one of his ancestors did so.  That’s it.  What the fuck?  Speaking a “variety” of languages?  “Variety” strikes me as the wrong word, by the way.  And travelling the world?  That’s what she thinks a princess is?  LOADS of people fit that definition and are not princesses.  And there are plenty of princess who DON’T fit that description.

Look, let’s not beat around the bush here.  She’s a fucking moron.  And delusional.  This seems to be the trend with people in Tony’s orbit.  They’re all morons and they’re all delusional.  Like attracts like.

“I choose this identity because in a world that can be so cruel, I create characters and stories that discuss important topics in a lighthearted manner, but with integrity and truth.”

First of all, did she really mean “choose” or did she want “chose”?  I mean…I guess that “choose” can work if she’s actively still…choosing it.  But…”chose” as in…the past tense…makes more sense to me.

But more to the point, where can we see your writing?  I want to read these “lighthearted” (not a word, by the way, it’s “light-hearted”) stories.  

“If I’ve learned anything through this journey as a filmmaker, it is to embrace everything that makes YOU unique. Use your experiences and passions to create content that will be your gift to this world.”

Okay, great.  Where can we see your filmography?  I want to watch the entire Casey Hempel filmography.  She’s a real filmmaker, guys.  Where are your films?

Oh, she has that covered.  They’re in the “media” section.

She has a picture that shows a bunch of awards that she allegedly won for a short called In Good Faith. 

https://www.imdb.com/title/tt4608528/?ref_=nm_ov_bio_lk1

There’s the IMDB page.  It was released in 2015.  Director: Casey J Hempel.  Writer: Casey J Hempel.

Okay, great.  This looks legitimate.  Comedy/romance.  The estimated budget was $6,000.  

Is there any chance of finding this online?  Let me check.

Well, she did a Kickstarter for it.  As here:

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1781908236/in-good-faith-christian-comedy/posts

She wrote a Christmas message.  “May we remember that Jesus is the reason for the season and that we must continue to spread LOVE wherever we go!”  She also adds a bible verse.

By the way, this is warning sign number whatever.  She’s a Jesus nut.  And this short that she did is a Jesus nut thing.

She got $2300 from Kickstarter from 26 people.  Jesus nuts have deep pockets, I guess.

So the short doesn’t seem to be available anywhere, either to watch legally or otherwise, but the trailer is on her website.  Let’s check it out.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=atcxvuOKFnc

It’s racist, the acting is atrocious, and the writing is hackneyed beyond belief.

It’s about an Indian man marrying a white fundamentalist Christian woman.  The Indian man’s parents have insanely stereotypical, fake accents.  They behave in a stereotypical Indian fashion.  They talk about how amazing America is.  These are just disgusting caricatures.  This shit has no place in modern society.  I expect this sort of racist bullshit from the 1970s but not today.

All of the fonts are in pink, by the way.  Because Casey is a girl!  Let’s all pay attention to Casey.  We have to applaud her racist “filmmaking” because she’s a woman. Yeah, the writing is god awful but…she’s trying!  She’s a woman.  We have to give her a pass.  Bad writing, racist writing, Jesus nut bullshit?  It’s all okay.  She’s a girl!  She’s doing her best.  Participation trophies for all of the lady Klansmen out there.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bFlBrbSiMpU

Here’s a “comedy” commercial that she claims to have written, directed, and produced.  I believe it.  It has her hallmarks: PURE SHIT.

At one minute in length, it drags.  I could barely even watch the minute.  NOTHING HAPPENS.  

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tj1Gvxjw32w

There’s a student film that she made for her big thesis project.  God bless anyone who can watch this thing.  I skimmed through it, desperately searching for some dialogue.  There’s none.  There’s no fucking dialogue.  Sometimes somebody is talking, their mouth is moving, but you don’t hear anything.

This is a writer?  Why would a writer make a movie with no fucking dialogue?  Because she knows that she can’t write.  

This was a project for the New York Film Academy.  Is this a legitimate institution or is this some University of Phoenix thing?

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/New_York_Film_Academy

Founded in 1992.  For-profit.  Branch campuses in Los Angeles and Miami.

Yeah.  This is a scam.  This is not a legitimate film school.  This place exists solely to extract money from idiots with a dream.  

The acceptance rate is 100%.  I’m not exaggerating.  I looked it up.  It’s 100%.

Tuition is $34,000 year. 

Yeah.  It’s a scam.  Total scam.  

https://www.reddit.com/r/Filmmakers/comments/6z0lr7/is_the_new_york_film_academy_accredited/

The responses seem to all validate my assertion.

So this is somebody who went to a scam film school that accepts everybody, she got conned, and now she’s trying to con other people into believing that she’s a filmmaker and a writer and a princess.  She’s none of these things.

No.  Let’s look at the writing more carefully because I know that she wrote some books.

https://linktr.ee/CaseyJHempel

Her LinkTree thing is mostly links where you can get her e-books.

https://caseyjhempel.gumroad.com/l/StrongFemaleLead

Strong Female Lead.  It’s a pink cover and there’s a bunch of clip art of film-related shit.  But this is a book about strength-training.  What does any of this film shit have to do with strength training?

It’s 41 pages.  Bit on the slim side.  

And the first 20 pages are complete filler.  It’s only on page 21 that she finally gives the fucking diet and/or exercise plans.  Maybe.

And is any of this going to build strength and muscle, as the virtual cover to this virtual book claims?  Is there any weight lifting at all in this?

If you want to find out, it’s $20 for this scam pamphlet.  

She also has some scam affiliate links to scam nutritional products and a “Jesus Saves” line of clothing.

Here’s her IMDB:

https://www.imdb.com/name/nm5110866/?ref_=nmbio_bio_nm

She has one writing credit and one directing credit.  They’re both for that racist piece of shit short Jesus nut thing that she did seven years ago.

Everything else is for “additional crew”.  Production assistant.  Assistant to the director.  And it’s all in low-budget stuff that you’ve never heard of.  Student films.  And these are from years ago.  Her most recent credit is from 2019.  She was on the marketing team of some unknown, Jesus nut, anti-abortion thing. 

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Unplanned

On Wikipedia, it’s described as propaganda; they dispute the accuracy of the depiction; the executive producer is a CEO of a pillow manufacturing company, an evangelical Christian, and a conspiracy theorist; and some tv channels refused to air ads for this “film”.

She’s a total fucking fraud from start to finish.  

But here’s the craziest thing of all: none of this is working and she’s still doing this.  She has 521 followers on Twitter. Nobody gives a shit about any of this.  She’s not getting a cent from any of this bullshit.  Why not just get an honest job?

I appreciate grifting as much as the next guy.  I saw and enjoyed The Sting, Paper Moon, The Hustler, The Music Man, A Big Hand for the Little Lady, all of that shit.  I love a good grifter IF they’re good at it.  She’s not getting ANYTHING from these grifts.  

When does she think that any of these numerous scams are going to take off?  

https://www.instagram.com/caseythefinalgirl/

Here’s her Instagram.  It’s an average-looking woman with no tits trying to be sexy.  Is this what Jesus would do?  Jesus had bigger tits than this woman in any event.

Everything is a scam with this woman.  The Jesus nut stuff is a scam.  She doesn’t actually believe in that shit.  She’s just trying to con dumb redneck fundamentalist Christians.  The right-wing bullshit is a scam.  Same thing.  She doesn’t believe that shit.  She’s just trying to cash in on people who do.  

She’s not a writer.  She’s not a director.  She’s certainly not a princess.

She went to a scam film school.  

This is all 100% bullshit.  Is working really that terrible?  

So now Tony expects us to watch this despicable, lying, scamming, subhuman piece of shit, in her little girl voice, talk about Predator for 78 minutes.  Tony can go fuck himself.  

Does Tony from Summarise the Movies not know a single person who isn’t highly objectionable?  People don’t want to watch complete scumbags summarising movies.  There’s no market for that.  

Horseface is disgusting.  Newt is disgusting.  Johanna is fairly disgusting.  That Italian woman is…well, it raises questions, doesn’t it?  I can’t think of anything particularly objectionable that she’s done but there must be something if she knows Tony.  Same with her brother Bill Bixby.  

Tony only knows scumbags.  He surrounds himself with scumbags.  And he’s a scumbag himself, of course.  It’s just the natural way of things.  Similar people tend to find each other.

2:00 – Oh, and she’s obnoxious as fuck.  Great.  I can stop here.

So that’s Tony from Summarise the Movies and his crew of scamming morons talking about Predator.