Gamer Girls

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yrww0zkvYzg

Newt will delete that video soon so I won’t bother putting the title in the description.  He’s reviewing some new Spider-Man movie.  Sort of.

Let me start by explaining the purpose of this article.  It’s not to talk about what a piece of shit Newt is or the low quality of the video or things of this nature.  I’m sympathetic to Newt (to a degree) and I think that Tony and his shitty Hack the Movies crew are complete scumbags..

I’m just going to tell it like it is.  I’m sick of Newt feeling sorry for himself.  It’s pathetic.  You were fired from a shitty job, and a shitty Youtube series that nobody watches, and everyone at Screenwave are human garbage.  You should be grateful that you’re out of there.  

0:00 – “It’s 3:00 in the morning.  I don’t sleep any more so that’s fun.”

It should be noted that Newt has a job.  Some lunatic on Reddit posted Newt’s LinkedIn.  He got a new job almost immediately after getting fired from Screenwave.  He’s working at a cinema in some managerial capacity.  

So what’s the problem?  He’s working.  He’s been working for two months.  The job is probably comparable to what he was doing at Screenwave.  We’ve seen what Screenwave pays.  It doesn’t get that much lower.

I didn’t work for two years after arriving in the UK.  I was homeless for a while.  I lived in a squat for a while.  And for the first five years of living in the UK, when I did have a home, it was an overcrowded, dilapidated, mouse and cockroach infested shithole.  I lived in a place with six guys from Sri Lanka and the shower didn’t work so we used a bucket.  I lived in another overcrowded shithole with six Indian guys and one day we were just all kicked out.  That happened in three properties, actually.  I lived in a place owned by Hasidic Jews, about 12 people from Eastern Europe living there, a mountain of garbage on the front lawn for the entire time that I lived there, and one day, they just brought thugs in to turn the gas and electricity off and change the locks.  No notice.  I have hundreds of similar stories.  

You want to know how many times I cried on the internet about this?  Not once.  I didn’t cry at all about it.  I got shit done.  

2:30 – “It’s hard to review this movie without being a dick.  I’m trying not be a dick any more.”

So he’s going to be a pussy instead.  He just changed genitalia.  

Then there was the time when my benefits/welfare application was rejected so I appealed and I took it all the way to the courts, even though I was homeless for part of this time and living in a squat for the rest of it, and I won, and I got all of the money that was owed to me, backdated from when I originally applied, and the judge tore into those faggots from the council, and I made those motherfuckers eat shit.  

That’s how I handled things.  I didn’t cry like a little girl about it.  I took the offenders to task.  

4:00 – “I’m old and my brain doesn’t work any more.”

No, you’re just a whiny bitch.  I’m older than Newt and I’m in fine health physically and mentally.

4:30 – “That’s why I’m sitting in my kitchen and my cat is biting my feet and Kevin Feige  is making billions and billions of dollars.”

I don’t know about billions of dollars but I can go to the US right now and make $100,000/year.  I see the jobs advertised.  There’s loads of them.  I’m qualified.  I learned the trade.

Or I can stay where I’m at and do whatever.  I can get a job in an office and make £25,000/year.  It’s fine.  

Or I can move anywhere I want.  Anywhere in the US, UK, Europe.  I have citizenship in three countries.  I can move to a village in Denmark, buy a house, and do jack shit.  Just collect benefits.  

These are the options that you have when you get up every day and do something with your life.  

Did I have any advantage over Newt?  Aside from not being a bitch, I don’t think so.  I had a shitty childhood, shitty adulthood.  But instead of wallowing in self-pity, I made a series of decisions to change my life.

10:45 – After reviewing the movie, he says, “I’m glad that I wasn’t shitty and skipped it because I’m a sad old man.”

I’m looking at Newt’s resume.  First of all, he’s significantly younger than I am.  But secondly, he worked in retail for a few years as a young man and then the rest of his jobs are in hotels, cinemas, and theatres.

It’s fine.  That’s what he chose to do.  If he didn’t like these jobs, he could have done something else.  

There was nothing stopping him, for example, from moving to China and teaching English.  

Or forget about moving abroad.  There was nothing stopping him from learning to cut hair, moving to San Francisco, and being a fabulous hair stylist.

Or he could have stayed right there in rural Pennsylvania and got a job as a dock worker.  Live out his Rocky fantasies.  They still have dock workers.  

He could have done whatever the fuck he wanted.  He chose to work in cinemas, theatres, and hotels.  He chose to work at Screenwave.  He chose to make these shitty “movies” with Horseface McGee.  

If he wasn’t happy with this, why did he do this for 20 years?  There was nothing preventing him from making a change at any point.  There’s nothing preventing him from making a change now.  He can do whatever he wants.  

But this is obviously what he wants.  That’s why he continues doing it.  He enjoys working in movie theatres, being “creative” with his shitty movies, and trying to have sex with horseface women.  This is his thing.  And that’s fine.  If that’s your thing, do it.  If it isn’t your thing, do something else.  But don’t fucking bitch about it and beg for sympathy.  

11:45 – “I’m trying not to have a pity party.”

What?  You’re clearly not trying very hard.

12:00 – “I’m investing in me.  It’s part of my therapy.”

Here we go with the pity party.

Then he says that he sold his movie poster collection and comic book collection because he’s trying to fund some shitty movie.  Oh my fucking god.  This is not it.  This is not the answer.  Did you see my examples?  English teacher in China, hair stylist in San Francisco, and dock worker in Philadelphia.  Where did I say, “Famous movie director?”

When I say, “You can do whatever you want”, I mean within certain limits.  You can’t be a professional basketball player or a neurosurgeon or a movie director.  You don’t have the talent or credentials for any of that.  

Take that money and spend it on a SENSIBLE dream.  Don’t blow it on your shark vampire movie.  What the fuck?  It’s idiotic.  This is not going to be a success.

12:45 – “I want to be more than the idea man.”

Holy shit.  Newt should not be anyone’s idea man.  I am not joking.  Shark Vampire was his big idea that he was proud of.  And he had similar, child-level ideas.  Monkey Exorcist.  Pigeon Mummy.  Shit like this.  This will never be a success in a million fucking years.  There is a zero percent chance of receiving ANY money, prestige, or happiness from this endeavour.

He wants to, “Put something on camera, even if it’s schlocky and hacky, at least it’s mine.”

Just use your camera phone to film your toilet droppings and go do something productive with your life.  He knows that this proposed movie is going to be bad.  How can it not be?  He can’t write and his ideas are shit.  So why bother?  

13:15 – “2022 is the last year that I’ve given myself to achieve some of the things that I’ve wanted to achieve since I was a kid.”

As a child, he wanted to make a series of fake commercials with a scantily-clad horseface woman?  

I can see as a child, wanting to make a good movie.  You think that you have great ideas.  “What if it’s Alf but he contacts his home planet and calls in a nuclear strike on the Tanner home?”  Shit like this.

But we’ve seen Newt’s ideas.  They’re horrible and he knows it.  Why make a horrible film?  I don’t get it.

– “I can’t wait to see all of the amazing things that you make”

This should not be encouraged.  I’m encouraging Newt to do something positive with his life.  These people are encouraging delusions.  Newt is not going to make an amazing anything.  Shark Dracula, people.  That’s his great idea.  That sucks dick and you know it.  

– “I got blocked from Tony’s channel I’m devastated . I was one of the longest and biggest supporters . Only thing I did I guess to deserve that was promote your channel when I saw ppl asking about u.”

Yeah, Tony and the gang are real pieces of shit.  I gave them the benefit of the doubt but the more I see of them, the less I like them.

– “Well done! Stop saying you’re old, your NOT! When you’re my age you can say it, maybe. By the way you’ll never have enough time or money. It’s one of those things about indie film. Great that you’re learning the technical side. It’s IMPORTANT! Spot on review. Believe in yourself Newt! Never think you failed. It’s only a failure if you do the mistake again. Keep going. My boys want to see the film bad, so eventually we’ll go and make a day of it. Till then keep on punching Newt!”

By your definition, he is a failure.  He’s been making the same shitty “movies” over and over again.  He has dozens, if not hundreds, of awful fake commercials starring Horseface McGee in a bikini.  This is shit.

Shark Dracula.  Robot Werewolf.  Hippo Frankenstein’s Monster.  These are his ideas.  They’re stupid.  Come on.  Do the right thing and tell him that these ideas are stupid. It’s not being cruel.  It’s being caring.  Don’t feed his delusions.  Steer him to a SENSIBLE goal.