Top BLOCKBUSTER SNES RENTALS of 1995! – Erin Plays

This shit again.  The reason she does these Blockbuster rental “reviews” is because the first such video she did performed well by her standards.  It’s currently at 58,000 views, which is about twice what she normally gets.  

But the second time she did one of these Blockbuster “reviews”, the video performed merely average.  It’s at 32,000 views at the moment.

I reviewed both videos here:

Here’s what’s happening.  When people initially saw this Blockbuster video, just from the title, they thought, “Oh, Erin is trying something new.  Let’s check it out.”

Then they watched the video and realise that it was the same old bullshit where she “reviews” games that she played for a few seconds, for the purposes of the video.  So they didn’t bother watching the second video.

You don’t get viewer retention by churning out crap.  People can only be burned so many times before they move on.  Erin needs to learn to put out GOOD CONTENT in order to get people to watch her videos.  She can’t seem to figure this out.  

The problem is that she’s completely incapable of producing good content.  Presumably, she wants to put out good videos.  She just can’t.  She knows nothing about video games and has no interest in this shit.  So this is what you get.  It’s a project that’s completely doomed to failure.  When is she going to figure this out?  Do something else with your life.

0:00 – “The year is 1995 and you already ate your stuffed crust pizza.”

Don’t tell me what I did, Erin.  Tell me what YOU were doing in 1995.  Was it anything?  Were you eating stuffed crust pizza?  No, you were eight years old and staring at a wall.

0:15 – “This list was a fun one for me because a lot of these games were a part of my childhood.”

Uh huh.  Which ones?  I’ll assume that Super Mario World and/or Yoshi’s Island are on the list.  If it’s anything else, she’s lying.  But let’s find out.  

0:30 – Killer Instinct.  Before I proceed with the video, Erin has indeed claimed to have owned this game for the SNES.  But she never played it.  This is one that she admits to never playing.  She owned it but never played it.

“The first violent video game I’ve ever played because it came with my Super Nintendo console.”

Yeah.  She talked about this in a video she did with John Hancock.

That’s a bizarre video.  I encourage everyone to check it out.  Any video that Erin does with another person is always fascinating.  She always gets exposed as a liar and a fraud.

1:00 – “I’m getting flashbacks to playing Street Fighter 2 on the Game Boy as a kid.”

Uh huh.  Why is this the first that we’re hearing about this?  

And Erin played Mortal Kombat 11, I think, with Mike and it was absolutely shocking.  I can’t find the video now, I wouldn’t be surprised if Mike deleted it, but it was really something.  

1:15 – “So I never bothered to wonder about the storyline until now but here it is.”  

Then she just reads from Wikipedia.  Oh my god.  Can this be any lazier?  

1:30 – “The game is even enjoyable if you’re someone like me who can not do combos or pull off super cool fatalities.”

Erin has said many times that she didn’t play this game.  She didn’t like the game.  Why would she?  It’s a game for 14 year old boys.  But now she’s claiming that she’s all about Killer Instinct.

1:45 – “It’s often referred to as one of the greatest fighting games of all time.”

This sentence probably ended with “citation needed” on Wikipedia.  Who considers Killer Instinct to be one of the best fighting games?  But of course Erin doesn’t know any better.

2:00 – Power Rangers.  “Being a kid during this time was awesome and Kimberly was my hero.”

Why have we never heard about Erin’s love for Power Rangers before?  She’s so *nostalgic* for all of these children’s shows from before she was born but we’ve never heard about Power Rangers.  But now she’s all about Power Rangers.

“Remember Susie Q on the Disney Channel?”

No.  I don’t know what you’re talking about.  Why don’t you enlighten us, Erin.  Don’t just say, “Hey guys!  Remember X?”  Actually tell us about it.  What was Susie Q?  What did you like about it?  

3:15 – Judge Dredd.  Then it’s over to trusty Wikipedia dot com.

“It’s an action platformer that I have not played until I made this video.”

You don’t say.  By the way, I think that the Power Rangers footage was from when Erin played the game for a Youtube video like three years ago.

4:00 – “Do any of you guys like this game?  Let me know in the comments.”

Why?  Are you going to play the game on the strength of some horntard saying that he likes it?  She doesn’t play games in her spare time.  Why the constant lies?

Then it’s NBA Jam: Tournament Edition.  Wikipedia dot com.

She refers to “wonderfully dated catch phrases” and “razzle dazzle” appears on screen along with the synthesised voice of Dick Vitale or somebody.  But no, people weren’t saying “razzle dazzle” in “the 90s”.  

Then she shows about two seconds of the commercial (maybe not even that long) to illustrate how “1995” it is.  I have no idea what’s so “1995” about that two second portion of the commercial.

4:30 – Donkey Kong Country 1 and 2.  Is she going to check out Wikipedia?  She is indeed.

5:30 – She claims to have owned Donkey Kong Country 2 as a child.  Uh huh.

Is she going to talk about how she liked Dixie Kong?  Oh.  I didn’t have to wait long.  Yes, she did indeed enjoy playing as Dixie Kong and whipping her hair around.  Cute.

6:30 – “1995.  That was a really good year, wasn’t it?”

You tell us, Erin.  What did you like about the year 1995?  Are you able to say anything remotely interesting AT ALL?

“Or maybe that’s just my *nostalgia* glasses talking.”

I’m ten years older than Erin so the arithmetic is always easy to do.  You know what I remember about the year 1985?  Not a single thing.  I was seven years old.  What grade are you in then?  Second?  

Let me think….second grade.  I mean, I remember stuff about school.  Going to school.  I remember what teacher I had.  I have maybe three memories of that year in school.

I was taught by a nun.  I stole a little plastic three-legged donkey from her class and I felt really bad about it.  The fourth leg had broken off.  It was just a little toy.  It was like clear, red plastic.  

Is this the woman who said that you should be happy when people die?  Yeah, it must have been because I remember my grandfather died, it was around this time, and I couldn’t understand why everybody was crying when the news broke.

What this woman said is true from a theological basis.  If you genuinely believe that when you die, your soul goes to heaven and there are dancing girls and whatever then you should be happy when people die.  These people are living it up now.  Life on earth is full of suffering but life in heaven is pretty sweet.

The reason that people aren’t happy when somebody dies is because they don’t actually believe any of that.  It’s just something that they say to try to feel better.  “He’s in a better place” and whatnot but they don’t actually believe it.

She also gave away her classroom possessions at the end of the year.  I think that she was retiring and she didn’t have anyone to give the stuff away to because she was a nun.  No family.  So I got a duck-shaped…what do you call it…a pot to put plants in.  It was like an Easter duck.  And yeah, my parents used it to put some plants in.  It might still be somewhere with a plant in it.

Oh, this woman also told a story about how she was once working in an office and then she heard God call her name so she got up and moved somewhere and a few seconds later, a giant light fell from the ceiling and had she still been sitting there, she would have been hit and possibly killed, I guess.  Maybe just badly hurt.  Perhaps this is what made her become a nun.  

Other than these things, I don’t remember anything about 1985.  I don’t remember what was happening in the broader culture.  I don’t remember anything about video games.  I don’t know if I was even playing video games.  Maybe Atari 2600 but it wasn’t a big interest of mine.

I don’t remember anything about Ronald Reagan at all.  I don’t remember watching any tv shows.  I don’t remember seeing any movies.  I wasn’t listening to any music.  I don’t remember doing anything with friends that I can pinpoint happened in 1985.  I don’t remember any of the toys.

So yeah.  1985 was a great year.  I guess.  The only thing I remember are stories that my second grade teacher told me.  

Presumably 1995 is similar for Erin.  Why the lies?  Why the fake *nostalgia*?  Why the shitty videos?  This was another absolute zero effort video from Erin.

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