Gamer Girls

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0aT4w2Q1BrU

Erin just mentioned Carmageddon recently.  Let me check the archives.

https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2021/06/super-silly-n64-stream-with-erin-plays.html

Yeah.  It was in her recent and horrendous N64 “variety stream”.  She’s reading from the chat and…

“We should play Carmageddon 64 since it’s the worst car game on N64?”

Then she just sighs. She doesn’t know anything about the game. And just listen to her stumble and have to sound out “Carmageddon”. She’s never even seen the word before.

Then Mike says that he was going to write an AVGN episode about the game. Erin says, “Oh, really? Bring it back.” That’s it. She basically said, “Oh, cool.” She knows absolutely nothing about the game, or AVGN, or how to have a conversation so this is all that she can say.

So is Screenwave just recycling disused scripts from Mike Matei now?  Well, it might be a good idea.  Just steal old scripts.  Kieran should be kept as far away from the script writing process as possible.

I’m not even sure if Kieran is the problem.  The boys on Reddit talk about the Shrek episode being particularly bad but I think that’s just because Tony wrote it.  That episode was bad but I didn’t find it exceptionally bad by Screenwave standards.  It was just the usual bad script from Screenwave.

Anyway, let’s check out the video.  It’s only 11 minutes.  Thank fuck.

0:00 – But first, a word from our sponsor: Keeps.  Or is it going to the testicle shavers?  Or just boring old VPN bullshit.  “Do you want to watch Netflix shit that’s only available in Japan?  Then get this VPN.”  Same shit every time.

Oh, it’s shilling for earbuds today.  He did this in a recent episode too.  He’s done it several times.

I noticed that Tony was shilling for some coupon company recently.  And I saw that John Riggs had the same sponsor.  Why isn’t James doing that?  Maybe they don’t pay much so only the smaller channels take the offer.

1:00 – The true start of the video.  We see James’ confusing hairline.  He’s using that Ronco hair in a can shit.  What else can it be?  

Think of the indignity of this.  Justin Silverman spraying Jimmy’s scalp with hair in a can.  It debases everyone involved.  Just get some clippers and put a number four guard on it.  What’s the big deal?  

“What happens when you combine cars with armaggedon?”

Autistic Word Play Fun with Jimmy Rolfe.  That should be a new series.

2:30 – There’s a reference to playing “turd pinyata.”  Unfortunate.  But otherwise, the previous 90 seconds were fine.  They even recognised that the game was fairly popular when it came out.

3:00 – “Die Anna looks like somebody farted in her face.”

I’m not seeing that but…okay.  

4:00 – Autistic word play.  I won’t even bother describing it.  It goes on for some considerable time.

8:15 – “Polygonal poo.”

8:45 – “The zombies move slower than soft serve shit.”

9:30 – A cameo of Jimmy as…that character from Big Riggs.  I don’t know.  The truck driver or something.

10:15 – They mention “K turning” for the second time.  What is this?  Are they talking about a three point turn?  

Yes…I looked it up.  I never heard of “K turn” in my life.  Is this a regional thing?  

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Three-point_turn

“Three point turn” is the formal name in Australia, Canada, New Zealand, and in many regions of the United States.  Less common terms are: “Y-turn”, K-turn” and Broken U-turn.

Maybe it’s a New Jersey thing.  Or a rural Pennsylvania thing.  Or a Northeast thing.  Or even a “East Coast” thing.  

I don’t know.  I’m conflicted.  On the one hand, I don’t want to discourage people from using their regional terms and dialects and whatnot.  But on the other hand, you’re putting this out on the internet for everyone to see.  It’s hindering understanding by using these terms.  

Then it just ends.  Kieran and Justin are given “crew” credit.  For one episode, they were actually given “written by” credit.  Why did that stop?  Because that’s clear and accurate.  I want to know who actually writes this garbage.

Anyway, this was…just boring.  There wasn’t TOO much poo stuff, so that’s always a plus.  But this wasn’t funny or interesting.  

I mean, I gave up on AVGN being funny many years ago, long before Screenwave, but can’t you at least make this shit semi-interesting?  

Let’s see what the boys on Reddit have to say.  There are already 79 comments and this was only released an hour ago.  I bet there’s going to be some quality stuff here.  “NO TIME!”  Hehe.  “No time”.  Like that thing that James says!  I get it.  Can we see a picture of Justin Silverman as Jabba the Hutt now?  That would be so epic.

Somebody says of the game, “In my country it was one of the most popular games for PSX.”

Just out of interest, what country is he from?  Let me check his profile.

Oh…he posts on a subreddit dedicated to…anime that features homosexual themes.  Come on.  This just confirms everything that I saw about that subreddit.

There was a post there recently where a guy made a “meme” of a heart pendant opening and inside there was a picture of Bootsy and the words “Bootsy my beloved”.  75 upvotes.  And somebody actually wrote, “This is borderline gay”.  

If that’s BORDERLINE gay, what does actual homosexual content look like?

Oh, this gay anime enthusiast mentions that Jimmy uses his VPN line about “but the REAL (whatever) is…” I don’t know.  I don’t remember what the line is.  But yeah, it’s true.  He used that line at least twice in the video and it was weird.

But yeah, those fine friends of Dorothy largely had the same view that I had.  It’s a boring video.  Nothing really to say.  It was bland.  I can’t say that it did a passable job but…it’s a video.  It’s a video about a video game.