Gamer Girls

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONVMwsnAjco

Without watching the video, maybe I can guess what games she’s going to cover.

Probably NES.  I was thinking that there’s that Easter egg in…Adventure or whatever that has the game designer’s name on some screen.  I think that’s considered the first Easter egg.  But is she going to mention that?  I’ll say no.

So NES Easter eggs…I can’t even think of any offhand.  But she also says “secrets”.  So that opens the door up.  Well, let’s just get into it.  See what Easter eggs she found on Wikipedia.  

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Easter_egg_(media)#In_video_games

Huh.  They mention the Konami code as an “Easter egg” in this article.  Never in a million years would I consider that an Easter egg.  So if Erin mentions this, I know for 100% certainty that she just went to Wikipedia for this shit.

And I was right about that game being Adventure.

0:00 – “I’ve always been interested in hidden secrets inside old video games.”

Define “always”.  I think that she means, “From about the time that I got the idea for this video, through the 30 minute “research” stage, and ending when I finish recording this video.”

“When you stumble upon little secrets in games you never knew about, you get an extra burst of satisfaction, especially when it comes to finding new things in games that you’ve played through a bunch of times.”

And there’s footage of Punchout: a game that Erin has openly admitted to never playing before.  Also, some Legend of Zelda game and Super Mario Bros 3, two games that I believe she’s also never played before.  She’s never done a stream of them, after all.  So she never played them.

She starts with Sword of Sodan on the Genesis.  Huh…just give me a minute.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuJt1CxZow4

That’s a stream that Mike uploaded to Youtube five days ago.  Go to 3:00:00 and you’ll see Mike briefly playing Sword of Sodan.  Mike, rightly, suggests that it’s an obscure game.

Gee, Erin.  Where do you get your ideas?

0:30 – “We all know that this game sucks.”

No we don’t.  I never saw it in my life until five days ago when I was watching Mike’s stream.  I never heard of this game.  

But Erin doesn’t have a fucking clue.  She thinks that this is a well-known game.  And naturally, she never heard of the game either until Mike did his stream about a week ago.  But she’s pretending to be a real “gamer”.  “You guys all know Sword of Sodan, right?”

She picks the female character, of course.  

Then she gives a quick rundown of this game that she’s never played before in her life.

Then it’s time for the Easter egg.  If you drink all of the potions at once, your character dies and a “Winners don’t use drugs” message appears.  Erin doesn’t get the reference.  It was a common screen in arcade games but Erin doesn’t know this so doesn’t mention it.  

1:30 – “You can accomplish this little trick in less than a minute if you play the game on easy mode.”

That’s the only mode that Erin ever plays on.  Thanks for the tip.

1:45 — Streets of Rage 4.  Huh.  Give me another minute.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sQcI66GAR_E

Two months ago, Mike did a five hour stream of this game.

Gee, Erin.  Where do you get your ideas?

And yeah, I saw this stream.  I remember Mike showing some Easter egg where if you did something involving a taser with an arcade machine in the game something would happen.  Let’s see if that’s the Easter egg that Erin is going to show.

1:45 – Well, well, well.  That was exactly the Easter egg that Erin demonstrated.  It was probably footage stolen from Mike’s stream as well.

2:30 – Star Fox…give me a minute.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BiFco90-6Cg

Mike uploaded a Star Fox stream yesterday.

Is this a fucking joke?  Is she intentionally doing this just to mess with me?  This is fucking ridiculous.  It couldn’t be any more obvious what she’s doing.  All she fucking did was take recent streams that Mike has done and put them into a compilation video.  This is the laziest fucking shit possible.  And it’s yet another illustration showing that Erin knows absolutely nothing about video games.

The Easter egg in question “Looks like a 90s fever dream.”

Hey guys!  Remember 90s fever dreams?  Fever dreams that were unique to the 1990s?

No, Erin.  I don’t even know what you’re talking about.  What does that possibly mean?  Were dreams different in “the 90s”?  

3:15 – She pronounces “dimension” with a long “I” sound.  Really weird.  Like she’s never seen the word before.

4:30 – She makes a Yoshi’s Island reference.  A game that she played on stream, for money.  

4:45 – Oh.  And Yoshi’s Island is the next game.  Well, at least it’s not a game that she’s stealing from a recent Mike stream.  She’s just repurposing her own streams for this one.  

You know, for a long time Erin talked about how Yoshi’s Island was her favourite game and she played it when she was a kid.  One of the first Youtube videos she did was Yoshi’s Island.  Then we finally got to see her stream the game maybe a year ago.  Something like this.  No, it must be longer than that because I wrote about it but it’s not on this site.  It’s in my personal archive of my old sub-reddit, though.

Holy shit was she bad at the game.  And this is one of the few games that she said that she had experience with.

6:00 – Castlevania III.  The game that she’s streamed more than any other game.  For money.

6:30 – Alladin.  Huh.  Mike definitely played this not too long ago.  But I don’t know.  I think that I’ve seen him play this game many times.

7:00 – “McDonald’s Treasureland”.  Full title seems to be McDonald’s Treasureland Adventure but whatever.

Yeah, Erin did a video on this and probably streamed it too.

8:15 – Cruis’n USA.  I’m sure that Mike played this in a somewhat recent “variety stream” but I don’t have a specific memory of it.  What I know for certain is that Erin has never played this game before and has no idea what she’s talking about.

9:15 – “I hope that you guys enjoyed this video and maybe even found something new.”

Well, not really because I watch all of your shitty videos and most of Mike’s videos.  

“Feel free to leave some secrets in the comments.”

Why?  I’m not going to do your research for you.

Anyway, another dogshit video.  And she doesn’t even appear on screen.  Shishi is sitting there with his dick in his hand.  “I waited two weeks for this?”

– “Streets of Rage 4 has multiple 16-bit secrets like that.”

Yeah, but that was the only one that Mike showed so that’s the only one that she knows.

– “I didn’t know about any of these! The Sword of Sodan one is so silly even though it’s a good message about not mixing medicines… I also need to try the Star Fox one sometime. I’m always glad to learn something new!”

That was from Hungry Goriya.  She’s super gay for Erin.  

– “My favourite episode (and it seems I’m.not the only one, I wonder why) is the Power Pad Games one. Part 2 coming anytime soon, or have you tried them all? :)”

He’s straight up talking about how he masturbates to these videos.

– “Hey Erin, did you know there is a controller that you can purchase at Best Buy that has a button you can press and instantly beat any video game on any console? It’s called the ‘Prettiest Gamer Girl’ button, and apparently you are the only person that can buy it. LOL!”

That one needs a lot of work.

– “Erin Plays with no Erin”

Erin replies, “I didn’t find it necessary to be on camera for this video :)”

Ummm…you know what these videos are, don’t you?  People with mental retardation masturbate to them.  So yes, you have to appear in the fucking videos.  NOBODY is watching these videos to learn about video games.