My First Twitch Compilation! – Erin Plays 

She never made a compilation before!  

Anyway, it’s just six minutes of sexual clips.  She’s either saying something sexual or doing something sexual.  That’s what the overwhelming majority of these clips are.  I guess that I’ll go through them just to illustrate my point.

0:00 – She’s playing King of Fighters and pauses when that kickboxer character pulls his pants down and moons the other character.  It’s his taunt.

0:00 – “Why is her name Milky?  Is it because she has big boobies?”

0:15 – Profile of Erin’s tits and she bounces around

0:30 – She says “fuck it” and then dances for some unknown reason.  “What’s my favourite stuff and things?  I like glitter and retro games and I like wood panelling and I like Instagram to talk about 80s interior design and I like cotton candy.”  She’s giving an intentionally (I hope) idiotic answer to show how cute and girly she is.  

1:00 – She names the Cacodemon plush “Milton” on the suggestion of some horntard in the chat.  By the way, she recently forgot this plush’s name.  So that shows how much she gives a fuck about this.

1:00 – She’s playing some Wii Sports games, standing up, and then she falls down and lays on the ground for a while.  She’s out of frame during this.  Then she lifts her legs and says, “Oh, look you can see my foot.”

1:45 – She’s standing while playing a game again and she’s wearing a little crop top and constantly raising her arms, lifting her top up.

2:15 – She laughs a lot because she doesn’t know who Paul Newman is.  It’s again, showing how cute and girly she is.  By being stupid.  Like 12 or 13 year old girls sometimes pretend to be stupid because they think that it’s cute.  Most people outgrow this but it seems that Erin hasn’t.

2:30 – A character is saying, “I’m not jealous at all” and Erin says, “Jealousy is a disease, bitch.”

2:45 – Erin is doing “cute” things to a Pokemon.

3:00 – Erin is dancing again.  She’s imitating some Pokemon.

3:00 – “For the record, I do not want to be a cute anime girl.  Too many testicles.”

Then she talks about how she meant to say “tentacles”, not “testicles.”

3:30 – She says “fucker” and then screams while playing some game where she’s a little girl running away from a guy with a chainsaw.

3:45 – She dies and says that she “forgot” about some enemy.  She also screams.  She’s showing how “cute” she is again.  By behaving like an idiot.

4:00 – She’s putting together this $60 Mario gingerbread house that her mother inexplicably sent her for Christmas and it falls apart.  It’s the same pre-adolescent behaviour that I’ve described.

4:00 – She fails at Castlevania because the controller becomes unplugged.  She pretends to panic and says, “Oh god” a bunch of times.  “This came out of the slot”.  She’s so unfamiliar with video games that she doesn’t know the term “unplugged” and calls the controller port a “slot”.  She says “The slot is loose.  Make your jokes.”  So obviously a sexual half-joke and also, it’s more pre-adolescent “cute” behaviour.

4:45 – She has trouble with her Siri or whatever electronics.

5:00 – Mike yells in the next room and she says her “house of madness” half-joke.  

5:15 – She blows on some handheld game in a “cute” game that requires blowing.

That’s it.  Then there’s a message that says, “I love our community” and she thanks the “clippers”.  Shishi is one of these “clippers” of course.  

In case people don’t know what I’m talking about with this pre-adolescent behaviour, let me explain further.  I used to work in schools and some like 12 and 13 year old girls would refuse to answer even the simplest of questions.  They would just say “I don’t know” in a “cute” way, even though they knew the answer.  It was considered “cute” to not care about school.   Effectively, it was “cute” to be stupid.  Being intelligent was considered unattractive.  

It’s something that almost everybody grows out of by the time they reach high school.  But this is exactly what Erin is doing as a 33 year old woman.  And these clips illustrate that this is the image that she wants to portray.  None of these clips show competent gameplay or any intelligent commentary, after all.  Every single clip is her doing or saying something stupid and/or “sexy”.

This is just more desperate “content” from her.  Speaking of which, that light gun video where she’s wearing fishnet stockings isn’t exactly setting the world on fire.  It has 26,000 views so far, which is more than her videos usually get, of late, but nowhere near as much as the Power Pad video got.  The Power Pad was getting exponentially more views than her normal videos.  This light gun video probably won’t even do twice as good as her recent videos.  After three days, it only has 5,000 more views than her previous most recent video, from three weeks ago.  So this was not a success.

She’s obviously desperate for views and has been for some considerable time.  She’s made comments about how she’s getting lower views than in the past and she’s attributed this to Youtube not notifying people of new videos and shit like this.  

What’s the solution?  Well, I don’t think that “sexy” videos is it.  Genuinely, she could do these videos topless and it wouldn’t make much of a difference.

I’d like to see somebody try this, just as an experiment, not for my own prurient reasons.  I’ve given this idea before.  Do Patreon only videos exactly as you do your Youtube videos but topless.  So you have a regular Youtube version of your video and then a topless version for Patreon.  

I’d be curious to know if this makes any difference whatsoever in subscriber count or view number or any other metric.  I don’t think that it would.  

A tamer idea is to do the videos in a bikini.  This way you can just put them all on Youtube.  Would more people tune in if Erin was “reviewing” games in a bikini?  I really don’t think so.  

The secret to getting more views is to put out good, interesting content.  Obviously, Erin can’t do that.  

I’m just looking at Erin’s list of videos…which was the first she did in Mike’s house?  Because I’m looking at videos from two years ago that were definitely from when she was living with her parents.  

I think He-Man (Intellivision & Atari) is the first video in Mike’s house.

And Remembering Lunchables was the last one in her parents’ home:

The backgrounds are different.

So early July 2018 seems to be when she moved in with Mike.  That’s about three years.  This buttsex for Youtube promotion thing obviously hasn’t worked.  She was getting similar views before and after moving in with Mike.  There’s no significant change.

When does she realise that this is not going to be a success and give up?  Three years is a fairly long time but it’s not insurmountable.  Why throw good years after bad?  Just stop what you’re doing and go get a job.  It’s not a big deal.

But no.  She’s going to continue this ridiculous bullshit where she completely debases herself, week after week, for the entertainment of horny retards.  And she’s getting $200/month for this.  It’s insane.  It’s self-destructive behaviour.  Anybody who cared about her would be telling her to stop making the fucking videos and go get a job.  Get your life together.  

How long can she possibly do this?  She’s going to be a 50 year old gamer grrl?  She’s already not getting any views as a 33 year old.  Her channel is going to take off when she’s 50?  

Even if that is the case, what is she going to do until then?  Continue to make $200/month?  And then maybe $300 next year?  This isn’t sustainable.  She needs money right now.  

Think of how scary it has to be to have to rely on Mike Matei for your very existence.  If Mike ever tires of the buttsex, she’s fucked.  Where is she going to live on an annual income of $2,400?  

She’s going to live with Joe from Gamesack and then be in a weird threeway relationship with John Riggs and his wife and just bounce from one pathetic “Youtuber” to another?  That’s no way to live.  Be self-sufficient.  

She doesn’t care.  She doesn’t care about her life.  Or anyone else’s.  It’s sad.

6 thoughts on “My First Twitch Compilation! – Erin Plays

  1. There is absolutely 0% chance of erin having ever played The King Of Fighters. It's a highly technical fighting game and if you aren't at least a very competent player, you're going to get thrashed by the cpu within seconds. the special moves involve over-elaborated inputs and you need a solid handle on them to stand a chance of beating the game. judging from the videos of people doing playthroughs and undefeated runs, this is the genre of game that only japanese and korean players seem to attain true mastery in.Guess what? I used to think that this blog was too harsh on erin and her antics to fleece the horntards out of their money, time and attention. I like to read about the videos because I don't have either the time or the tolerance to watch them. But I've come to the realisation that any flak that she catches is fully deserved. Erin is a shameless e-thot that will lie about everything if it means more attention. And her move to associate with someone from cinemassacre for clout proves what sort of person she really is.

  2. You couldn't be more wrong. Erin played King of Fighters right here: reviewed the video here: plays it from 28:45 to 39:15. That's over ten minutes.It was the first time that she ever played it. Indeed, it was the first time that ever played ANY Neo Geo game. This was during a Neo Geo “variety stream”. She ends the session by saying, “So that was King of Fighters. King of Fighter or King of Fighters?”She never even heard of the series. But still. She played it. It's right there. Didn't you see the clip? She played the game on stream, for money. Where else would she play video games?

  3. Seeing how static the cpu was acting, I assume that it was set to level 1 or 2. But she didn't toggle the difficulty option, maybe it was done off screen. meh. Also, she left the dialogues in japanese, not even bothering to change the language. Maybe she understands it who knows. Erin never fails to surprise her audience after all

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *