Super Retro Gal: Saving the Planet One Sanctimonious Tweet at a Time

 https://twitter.com/super_retro_gal/status/1385233091736735751

Research and buy slave-free chocolate. The chocolate corporations like Hershey and Nestle are still using slave chocolate on the Ivory Coast. Stop supporting those businesses. 

And then she promotes some chocolate company

No, thanks.  I exclusively eat chocolate produced by slaves.  It’s not about price.  Slaves just make the best chocolate.  Didn’t you learn anything from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory?

https://twitter.com/super_retro_gal/status/1385233092739096587

Try using a non-plastic straw. Now, I know this is a BIG deal apparently. But try it. I love 

Then she promotes some straw manufacturing company.

Fuck off.  Those paper straws are useless.  They fall apart as soon as they get wet.  Something of a problem, given their typical use.  And metal straws are vile.  They’re a breeding ground for bacteria.  Who can possibly clean inside of a straw?  You’re going to get fresh pipe cleaners out every time you want to clean your straws?  Who has the time?

All of this “save the planet” bullshit annoys me.  It’s targeting the wrong people.  I’m not the one forcing people to work on cocoa plantations.  Target your rage at the people who are creating such a system.  

30% of the fossil fuel CO2 emissions are from China.  Chinese companies.  Chinese factories.  But you’re going to bitch at me because I don’t recycle my grocery bags?  Fuck you.  It’s a grain of sand in the Sahara Desert.  Target the people at the top, you dumb fucking bitch.

But I get it.  Writing these self-righteous tweets is a whole lot easier than toppling the dictatorship of the capitalists and installing a dictatorship of the proletariat.  And you feel good about yourself.  It’s good for your mental health.  “Look at me, guys.  I’m doing my part by haranguing all of you sad bastards.”

https://twitter.com/super_retro_gal/status/1385233093502504965

For all my women out there: menstrual cups will change your life. Start to research them. There’s all different shapes and sizes because we are also not one size fits all. Stomp the pink tax out.

Oh god.  Are you fucking…oh.  No.  Menstrual cups?  On the one hand, I absolutely do not want to look into this.  On the other hand, I kind of have to.

Menstrual cup…oh.  Oh my…no.  This is…what?  Oh fuck.  

Does she have no shame?  

I’ll spare everyone the details in case you’re eating or just don’t want to have nightmares for the next six months but basically, it’s a reusable alternative to tampons or pads.  It’s basically a small plastic cup that you…oh…I’m getting light headed.  But you can use these things for up to ten years.

Now, I’m no doctor.  But it seems to me that putting something up in yourself that had blood in it every month for up to ten years is a recipe for infection.  Because you’d have to fucking boil these things to clean them.  Who’s going to be that thorough with the cleaning?  Who has time for this?  Who has the stomach for this?  Taking blood filled cups out of your….oh fuck.  I don’t want to think about it.

But Super Retro Gal wants you to put a plastic cup up your…oh fuck.  This is a new low for the blog.  You’re saving the planet by doing this.  By walking around with a bloody cup inside of you, you’re saving the planet.  Fucking unbelievable.  What a detestable person.

And do you know who replied to all of these bullshit messages?  NOBODY.  What you put up your vagina is your own business.  We don’t need lectures about it.  We don’t need to be told that we’re destroying the planet if we don’t put plastic cups up our pussies.  

https://twitter.com/super_retro_gal/status/1385233094370676745

I think there’s so much more we can do, even though just trying to use more reusable bags, cups, bottles and straws is amazing. I also have been using reusable sandwich bags. I bought mine in 2010 and they are still going strong.

Then she promotes a company who sells such bags.

Never accept a sandwich from Super Awkward Gal.

It’s risible.  She’s a walking stereotype.  This vapid, California, SJW, hippie bullshit.  

Then she posts 100 times about how she’s going to Disneyland.  Really?  How much damage to the environment is the Disney corporation doing?  All of those shit plastic toys.  The CO2 emissions from the rides.  All of the CO2 emissions that the millions of people emit getting to the park from all over the world.  The slave wages that they pay their workers.  The union busting.  All of those needless fountains and water rides wasting water.  

If you’d like to learn more, here’s an article from 2009.  Still valid, though.

https://www.theguardian.com/environment/2009/mar/19/disney-greenwash-fred-pearce

We can do this all day.  Get down off your high horse, you fucking braindead scumbag.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XNLnbvqsxo

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5XNLnbvqsxo]

7 thoughts on “Super Retro Gal: Saving the Planet One Sanctimonious Tweet at a Time

  1. Yeah, I haven't used straws since I was a kid. You get them in restaurants, though, of course. She should be directing her rage to the McDonald's corporation and whatnot.

  2. You really need to figure out what racism is. I don't even know what you're talking about. Is it “racist” to mention the “slaves” making cocoa? Or is it “racist” to point out that most of the pollution comes from Chinese corporations and factories? Or is it “racist” to post that Disney cartoon? I genuinely have NO IDEA what you're talking about. Same with your bizarre assertion that suggesting that the war in Iraq was founded on a false narrative was “racist”. If you're not going to say things that even MAKE SENSE, I'm not going to dignify your shit with a response any more.

  3. maybe it's possible to be a simp without being a creepy loser to boot. “Unknown” just fails at showing us how

  4. LOL the author being like “well I might not be racist persay, but I'm very openly homophobic/transphobic and sexist”Fuck off dude. If you go back far enough on this blog there's copious examples of you saying racist stuff about Middle Easterns and Asians.You “defending” yourself makes you look even worse here.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *