Gamer Girls

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-woadFiEdBo

I assume that this is the stream where she found the games for her 5 Bad SNES Games.

https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2021/01/5-bad-snes-games-erin-plays.html

Absolutely everything has to be on stream, for money.  She can’t even do research in her spare time.  If she’s not getting paid, she’s not touching any video games.  She won’t even look at them without getting paid.

0:00 – “Hey guys!  What’s up?  Happy New Year.  I’m here with…mmmm…Mike?”

Just watch this.  It’s the most awkward shit you’ve ever seen in your life.

When she was introducing him, I thought that she was going to put her arm around him.  You know, as couples sometimes do.  But she just awkwardly pointed to him.  

She must detest every moment of living with Mike.  I mean…she’s there in a buttsex for Youtube promotion agreement.  She’s getting like $200/month from Youtube and however much from Twitch, it can’t be much.  I mean…imagine getting fucked in the ass every day by a man you don’t love for PENNIES.  Mike is making out like a bandit on this agreement.  It’s the next best thing to being in a real relationship.

But for Erin…every day must be a struggle.  

Forget about the assfucking.  I’m just thinking of myself, as a heterosexual guy, if I was in some sort of sex for Youtube promotion with some woman I wasn’t interested in, I moved across country to live with her, and the whole thing was a giant disaster, I’d be really resentful to this woman.  I was promised fame and fortune if I moved in with you and did all that sexual stuff to you.  I’m getting $200/month.  This is not working.

With this in mind, watch this intro again.  It is awful.  She can’t even bring herself to lay a single finger on him.  

I’m not saying that they have to start dry humping.  But even as a JOKE put your arm around him.  She’s been living with this guy for over two years (I think) and that’s the best that she can manage.  Awkwardly pointing at him.  

And then yeah, she says that this stream is because she wants to do a bad SNES games video.  And that poor bastard Mike is just sitting there with a grin on his face.  He’s there with a total fucking fraud, he knows it, and she hates everything about this.  She hates the video games, she hates Mike, she hates rural Pennsylvania.  What the fuck has she done with her life?

0:15 – “I know that you guys have some ideas.  Like I know ShiShi will be in here, maybe, if he’s in here tonight.”

And Mike makes a weird face.  ShiShi also goes to a lot of Mike’s streams.  But…it’s pathetic.  This whole thing.  Doing these shit streams for a handful of horny, obsessed perverts like ShiShi.

By the way, I was watching a recent stream that Mike did and he referred to a comment that ShiShi made.  I can’t remember the show…Step by Step or something…but ShiShi made a reference to how one of the teenage girls on there was really hot.  ShiShi makes a lot of comments like this.  And just at his Twitter, which is full of pictures of anime girls.  Do I have to say anything?  And this is Erin’s biggest fan.

0:30 – The first of what will be many, many, many edits.  This is why I don’t watch this shitty “extras” channel any more.

So what did she cut out?  Basically nothing.  It was just a couple of sentences where she said that she was talking really fast because she drank a Red Bull.  Who gives a fuck?  Why did she edit that out?  

If you’re going to edit out anything, edit out that awkward intro where you pointed to the love of your life: Mike Matei.

1:00 – Another edit.  Mike is giving a suggestion of a game that he’d like Erin to play and it cuts out right before he’s about to say what the game is.

No.  Again…this was SECONDS.  And nothing even was really said.  It was just Mike scrolling through the games for a few seconds.  She cut this out.  Why?  

1:45 – So it’s some Road Runner game.  Mike says that some people like it.  Erin says, “If people can like Skate or Die, they can like anything.”  Mike makes a face, knowing that Skate or Die is a fairly popular game.  Erin just didn’t know the controls.  This was one of the games in her 5 Bad NES Games video.  She played it for less than a minute.

4:30 – After playing the game, really poorly, for the first and last time ever, she said that the game is pretty good.  She had no clue what she was doing.  But she had “fun”.  Not enough fun to play in her spare time but for those three minutes, she had fun.

Then she wants to quit but Mike tells her to keep going.

5:00 – “I love the colours of the balloon.  I love the colours of the background.”

That’s not a quote from Erin.  MIKE said that.  I’ve also noticed that he’s been saying, “I never played this before” quite a bit lately.  Pretty soon he’s going to start talking about how stressful games are and that his hands hurt.

6:00 – “Space Ace?  Maybe.”

She says this with a total lack of recognition.  So she obviously just Googled that game for the video.  She knew absolutely nothing about this game before this Googling exercise.

7:30 – “Okay, this isn’t great.  I want to move on.”

She wants no part in any of this.  I don’t understand why she tortures herself.  She doesn’t even want to play GOOD video games.  Why play bad ones?  For a few minutes each?  For a handful of horny losers?  For pennies?  In exchange for buttsex with this guy who you’re completely repulsed by?

How could somebody even get themselves into a mess like that?  Think of the series of horrible choices that she had to make to arrive at this location.

8:00 – Mike starts reading a list of suggestions from the chat.  Not ONE of these registers with Erin.  They’re titles like Pit Fighter and Bubsy.  She never even heard of these.  

8:15 – Another edit.  I just don’t care any more.  This video is over two hours long.  If I make it to the 15 minute mark, it will be a miracle.  Let’s just move on.

9:30 – Erin is playing Mighty Max, poorly.  She compares it to “That McDonalds game for the Genesis.”  She can’t even remember the name.  She did a video on this game.  That was the only time in her life that she ever played this game.

“What the hell is it called?  Why am I blanking?”

Because you only played the game one time in your life.  For a shitty Youtube video, for money.  Don’t worry about it.  I don’t remember the names of games that I only played one time either.

10:45 – They’re talking about how the game looks like “Diarrhoea Hell”

Mike: Everything is brown.

Erin: Everything is brown.

Mike: They got brown o-rings everywhere.

Erin: (groans) Okay.

Again with the assfucking.  Every day must be a nightmare for her.  But it’s a nightmare of her own creation.  She tried to use Mike to further her Youtube “career” and it backfired horribly.  So now every day is sodomy.  And she’s doing it for $200/month.  

When you look at that way, it’s kind of a feel good story.  An awful person tried to use somebody for her own financial gain and ended up getting fucked in the ass for $200/month as a result.  How could it be any better?  Dastardly villain gets her comeuppance.

I’m just going to skim now to see what other games she played, briefly, for pennies.

12:00 – Home Alone 2.  “How do you jump?”  Uh huh.

19:00 – Erin shows off her notebook.  She says that she doesn’t want to “fuck it up” because it’s very “ornate”.  Mike says, “Don’t worry, if you fuck it up, I’ll buy you another one.”  Erin rolls her eyes and exhales loudly.  

But yeah, that’s…that’s the relationship.  She only brings in $200/month.  He has to buy her everything.  And with that power comes unlimited access to the buttocks.

I’m all for women being treated the same as men.  So…you know…Erin should get a job.  That way she’s not at the mercy of Mike.  She doesn’t have to rely on a man for everything.  This whole thing is her giant fuck up because she’s too lazy to work for a living.  

She can’t even buy a NOTEBOOK.  Think about that.

Anyway, she plays Beauty and the Beast.  Briefly.  For the first time ever.  “I forget how you growl.”  Uh huh.

22:15 – Ignition Factor.  

22:30 – “Play Ghoul Patrol?  We’re playing BAD Super Nintendo games.”

I think that Erin is thinking of Ghoul’s n Ghosts.  Because Ghoul Patrol looks like a pretty bad game.  And I’ve never heard of it so no way has Erin heard of it.  

Anyway, Ignition Factor requires WAY more work than Erin is prepared to do.  You have to read text and equip items and shit.  She doesn’t want to do it.  Moving on.

28:00 – “Let’s play Phalanx”

Interesting pronunciation from Mike.  Obviously not a student of ancient Greek warfare.

It’s a “shmup”.  “Oh, look at that.  I have little bombs.”  Yes.  Like in most every “shmup” ever made.  Moving on.

30:30 – Batman Forever.  “Hey BroomHatter.”  Moving on.

37:00 – Space Ace.  

Erin: Is this the one that was also a…

Mike: Like Don Bluth?

Erin: (clueless).  Oh.  What’s the space one that’s like, it was like King’s Quest and there was a fake one?  Because I’m not a PC person.

Mike: Oh.  Space Quest.

Two issues arise.  First, she had NO IDEA who Don Bluth was but in her Youtube video, she presented herself as something of a Don Bluth historian.  

Secondly, she didn’t know that the space-themed series of games similar to King’s Quest was called Space Quest.  It was kind of Sierra’s thing to put “quest” in their titles.  But, naturally, Erin has no idea about any of this.

Then Mike sarcastically says, “How dare you get Space Ace and Space Quest mixed up?” 

They’re two totally different games.  The only similarity is that they both have “Space” in the title.  

I can’t believe that Mike actually thought that Erin was going to mention Don Bluth.  

38:30 – She’s reading from the chat.  “Is Super Punch-Out hard?  Umm…I haven’t played Super Punch-Out.”

One of the most popular games on the system.  But yeah, have you seen her do a stream or Youtube video of it?  Then she hasn’t fucking played it.  This isn’t challenging stuff.

So she’s playing Space Ace.  Poorly.  For less than a minutes.  And when she was doing the Youtube video 5 Bad SNES Games, she said, “I’ll be honest, I’ve never gotten past this part.”

THIS is what she was talking about.  This stream.  Where she played the game for the first time in her life.  FOR SECONDS.  She counts THIS as having played the game before.

She also keeps pointing out the “dick” in this game and Mike doesn’t see it.  This is a comment that she made in her Youtube video too.  So…she’s just recycling “jokes” as well.  She put not effort AT ALL into this video.  

She wanted to find bad SNES games.  So what did she do?  Go on stream and take suggestions from the horny losers.  She’s getting paid for this.  And then she just recycles her shitty “jokes”.  She couldn’t even be bothered to come up with new material.

39:00 – “Look at his floppy feet.”

Yeah.  She made that “joke” in the video too.  This is fucking shit.  If you’ve seen the stream, you have no reason to watch the Youtube video.  The Youtube video is basically an edited version of the stream.  With added information from the good people at Wikipedia.  

Of some note, she got further in this initial playthrough than she did for her Youtube video.  She didn’t get ANYWHERE in the Youtube video.

39:15 – 

Mike: Have you ever played Dragon’s Lair?

Erin: Yes! 

Mike: You know how it’s a very particular…

Erin didn’t mention the fact that she only played the game on stream, for money.  And that she was talking about the NES version.  Oddly, I think that Mike might have been talking about the NES version too.  

Anyway, she just keep running into the laser for reasons that totally escape me.  She’s in a safe spot, all she has to do is stop moving, but she keep running straight into the laser.  I have no idea why.  She doesn’t know what she’s doing.  She doesn’t have a clue.

Then she puts this game in her list of bad games.  In this “elaborate” notebook.  How odd.  

You know, I don’t want to watch any more.  I’m “only” at 40 minutes but this is fucking dog shit.  

– “1:07:59 Erin what was that sound?”

It was Erin making a vaguely sexual noise.  This is the audience.  This is what they’re doing.  

– “Playing TImecop where you don’t know if you play as Sylvester Stallone or Steven Seagal and it is actually Jean Claude Van Damme”

Yeah.