https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3vxJpK5kZMo
0:00 – “Aloha. Ma…Mela Kaleeki Maka (???) is what I should be saying.”
She’s just so painful and awkward and uncomfortable to watch. What the fuck is she even saying? Who is this for? Does she have a large Hawaiian audience? A Hawaiian audience who doesn’t understand English?
According to Wikipedia dot com, in 2001, native Hawaiian speakers amounted to 0.1% of the Hawaiian population.
I’m reminded of the Brady Bunch episode where they go to Hawaii. And Bobby finds that tiki idol. And it brings bad luck to the Brady clan. Greg almost drowns in a surfing contest. And a tarantula drops on Peter while he was sleeping. And some creepy old dude kidnaps the Bradys and locks them in a cave prison? Am I really remembering this right? Let me look this up.
Holy shit. Mike is going on a business trip to Hawaii and his company lets him bring his whole family with him. You don’t get perks like that any more. I mean, business trip, fine but why would a company also let you bring your family along? I think Alice was there too. So he goes to the payroll department and says, “I’ll need an additional eight tickets and three extra hotel rooms.”
I don’t know. Maybe it was only two extra rooms. Maybe Alice stayed in the same hotel room as Mr and Mrs Brady and got to watch.
Yeah, I think I am remembering right. Vincent Price was the creepy old guy. He imprisons them because he thinks that they’re going to steal some artefacts from him. Or something.
I remember thinking that spider was so fake looking but no, that’s real. I was just trying to make it less scary for me. Let’s hope that Christopher Knight was paid extra for that scene.
Now back to…eugh…SuperVideoGameGal. I’ve put it off long enough.
“It’s like 63 degrees outside.”
What an oddly specific number.
0:15 – “We are going to film my top five, question mark, Christmas items that I have.”
She actually read the punctuation.
She also says, “ya’ll”. Do people in California say that? Erin doesn’t say that. Why is SuperVideoGameGal saying that? This isn’t the first time. It’s another obnoxious character trait of hers. And it’s a long list.
1:30 – The sound inexplicably gets really muted. Did she watch this before she uploaded it?
3:00 – She describes a Santa bobble head as “sus”. Previously, she described him as “sceptical”. So…”sus” as in “suspicious”? I don’t know. This woman is probably about my age but I’m not down enough to understand what she’s saying.
3:30 – She says “ya’ll” again. So yeah, just confirming that this is something she says a lot.
4:45 – “Tushy”. It’s a Yiddish expression. Pardon my antisemitism but it just annoys me when non-Jewish people do this. It’s common in the US.
5:00 – “Ya’ll” makes another appearance.
It’s just all so off-putting. If she was actually from the South, I’d give it a pass. But she isn’t.
Same with “tushy”. If she was Jewish, fine. But she isn’t.
Why does she speak like this?
5:15 – She complains that she didn’t get some elves from her grandmother when she died.
Well, I can relate. There was a WWII plaque of my grandfather’s that I wanted but that went to somebody else. I wasn’t even consulted. So instead, I got his vintage firearm. What the fuck am I going to do with this? I live in the UK. Am I going to smuggle it in? Hide it up my ass? So I got fucking nothing.
9:45 – She’s showing off Christmas ornaments that she had as a child. She suggests that one that says “1986” was like her first ornament.
Really? So she’s like 34? Whatever.
11:00 – She apologises for not uploading more. “It’s been a little crazy at work”.
She’s talking about her job at Screenwave, I assume. And I think she’s only working part-time. And it’s like home-based. So how crazy can it be?
I mean, that’s total bullshit if they’re working her hard for a home-based, part-time job. And I’m sure that they are. I read a job description. For a part-time job, they expected you to travel for conventions and whatever. Fuck you. I’m not doing any travel for a part-time job. And certainly not for what Screenwave is likely paying.
11:15 – “I’ve had a migraine for like the last week and a half.”
Didn’t somebody mention migraines recently? And I pointed out that this is a common malady that women claim to have?
No, I’m not finding it. Maybe I never uploaded the review. Oh yeah. It was a post I did about SupaPixelGirl but never uploaded. She said that she had a migraine. Anyway, moving on.
11:30 – “I hope that you have a great Christmas, if that’s what you celebrate, or whatever you celebrate this year. Please enjoy it.”
I celebrate Kwanzaa.
12:15 – She finishes with “ya’ll”.
But yeah, Kwanzaa. I’m so *nostalgic* for Kwanzaa. It used to be all the rage in “the 90s”. But now it’s completely fallen off the map. How come? Because it’s completely made up bullshit. Some guy in California invented it in the 1970s. Let me check Wikipedia for confirmation.
Yeah, well 1966 was the first year it was “celebrated” but it was just invented by some guy in California, as I said.
Why would anybody do this? Cosplaying as Africans and whatnot. Actual Africans aren’t celebrating Kwanzaa. They’ve never even heard of it. This is an American holiday. A totally made up American holiday. You might as well celebrate Festivus.
It’s like Black History Month. No, actual black people in Africa and the Caribbean aren’t doing that shit. It’s an American thing. And the holiday is even intended to only celebrate black Americans.
Instead of making stuff up, why not look at what people in Africa actually do in late December? They’re celebrating Christmas or they’re celebrating Eid, depending on their religion.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Religion_in_Africa
49% Christian, 42% Muslim.
But whatever. Happy Kwanzaa, everyone.