https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pxd8v0p5NRY
0:00 – “So this is, what I would always refer to — because I could never remember the name of it — umm, the cute and weird Famicom game about penguins. See? There it says ‘Penguin Dreams’ but (looks at other computer screen) I’m trying to remember the title because I forgot it. I think it’s actually Yume Penguin Monogatari.”
I’m not going to get mad about this. Yeah, Erin started the stream off with a bald faced lie but this is what she does. She’s a pathological liar. There’s something wrong with her. She can’t help it. She deserves our pity.
She first played this game EIGHT DAYS EARLIER. On stream, for money, of course. It was in this stupid “variety stream”:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GvDKtuZCSjA
I reviewed that video here:
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2020/09/nes-variety-stream-sword-master-toki.html
Why would she use words like “always” and “never” in relation to a game that she played ONE TIME, briefly, on stream, for money, EIGHT DAYS AGO?
Let’s say that you’re making Texas style chilli. You’ve never made chilli before. But you found a promising recipe on the internet so you tried it out. You shared it with your wife or girlfriend or whoever and everything turned out pretty good.
Eight days later, she says, “I really liked that chilli. Could you make some more?” And you say, “Anything for you, honey” and you go to the kitchen and get to work.
You prepare a bowl for your partner and one for yourself and the two of you start sharing your meal. She says, “Did you use cumin in this? And what about putting beans in here next time?”. You reply, “Of course. I always use cumin. And I’m sorry but I never put beans in my chilli.”
Your ladyfriend would say, “What the fuck are you talking about? You first made chilli EIGHT DAYS AGO! ONCE! So why the fuck are you using words like ‘always’ and ‘never’? It doesn’t even make sense. Is there something wrong with you?”
This is effectively what Erin has done here. She’s just straight up lying. Because no sensible person would use words like “always” and “never” for something that they did ONCE and it was EIGHT DAYS AGO. That’s just not the way that the language works.
And what’s astonishing is that nobody calls out this obvious lie. These people go to every single stream. Why did nobody raise their hand and say, “Erin? Didn’t you play this for the first time eight days ago, briefly, on stream, for money? Why are trying to mislead us by using terms like ‘always’ and ‘never’ in reference to this game?”
It’s just madness. How can they sit there and accept being lied to? And she does this all the time. Her entire persona is a lie. She has no fucking interest in video games and never has. It’s obvious. She barely even hides this fact. And yet, there’s Shishi and NewWaveJunkie and Sergio and the rest of these losers jacking off. “Oh yeah…Erin is a super gamer. She’s playing obscure Famicom games!”
None of it makes sense. Why couldn’t she just say, “I discovered this recently on my variety stream”? That’s the truth and we all know it. So what’s the problem? Why try to present yourself as somebody who has a long history with this game when it’s blindingly obvious to everyone in the stream that you first played this game eight days earlier?
Here’s what she said in that “variety stream” after somebody suggested she play the game.
49:45: “Let’s play Yuma something…whatever that penguin game was on Famicom”
“Where’s my Choco Taco? The the…what do you call it…the Frostbite video?”
“Alright…I guess it would be under here?”
And she clicks “roms”.
“See if it’s on here. I wonder if there’s like an English translation. There we go. Let’s try it.”
“Oh this one. This is the wrong one?”
“This one’s like, they’re making him lose pudge.”
She doesn’t know that from memory. She’s reading the opening animation sequence.
“This is really cute.”
“So let’s play”.
Then she jumps straight up a few times. She’s trying to “remember” quote, unquote, the controls.
“Get the clocks, gain more time”.
She read that on screen. She was obviously unfamiliar with this. This is the first thing that happens in the game.
“Oh! Get diet drinks to shape up?”
This is an integral part of the game. You periodically get this “shape up” icon and lose weight. It’s like playing Super Mario Bros and not realising that there are mushrooms.
“Look at this map!”
She played the intro “level” (which was just like a 15 second tutorial) and then saw like the overworld map. And she was totally blown away by it. She obviously has never seen this.
So I don’t need to go on. She clearly was totally unfamiliar with this game. And she even lied in this video by saying, “Oh, this one” like she had some familiarity with it. She has CLEARLY never played this game before.
Now we can go back to the video at hand: Yume Penguin Monogatari.
0:15 – “In case you’re just joining, to sum it up, I’m really into Cobra Kai.”
Oh, of course. She’s so *nostalgic* for The Karate Kid (1984) even though she was born in about 1989. And what woman DOESN’T love movies and television shows that feature a lot of kicking and punching? Particularly movies and tv shows that are aimed at adolescent boys.
Then she promotes her latest Youtube video which was all about *nostalgia*. She can’t even remember the phrase “Better Blocks”. That’s how *nostalgic* she is for these things.
0:45 – She starts giving the lore of this game, as though she’s intimately familiar with it. Let me check how many minutes she played this game on stream, for money. Twelve. She played the game for TWELVE MINUTES and now she’s a fucking expert.
1:30 – “I don’t totally understand this game. It’s fucking bizarre.”
Well, put more than 12 minutes into it and you might start to figure it out.
“Look at his little kick.”
Cute. Does this sound like somebody who ever played the game before?
Then she got hit by the second enemy and said, “Oh no…so are we back…I don’t know.”
She wasn’t sure if this game was a one hit death or not. How could somebody who played the game before not know this?
You know, she DID play the game for 12 minutes. We know that much. So how could she not know about this one hit death thing (or not) even based on those 12 minutes?
She must just be completely checked out when she’s playing this shit. Nothing gets retained. It’s like how she can never remember the name of games that she played before (on stream, for money).
“So I tried this out a little bit on the NES variety stream that I did last week and I’m like, ‘You know what? We need to play this’.”
On stream, for money, of course. Never in your spare time. But why didn’t she just say this to begin with? Why does she portray herself as somebody with ANY knowledge of the game? Why use words like “always” and “never” for a game that you played ONCE and it was EIGHT DAYS AGO for TWELVE MINUTES?
Absolute shit tier gameplay, by the way. That should come as no surprise. She doesn’t know the controls or the basic gameplay mechanics AT ALL.
2:45 – “Welcome to Erin Plays where nothing makes sense and everything’s a mess.”
I can endorse that.
4:00 – Ha! She says “boing” a bunch of times. Classic Erin Plays “comedy”
4:45 – Then she finishes the level and doesn’t think that she did good enough to go the next level. “Oh but it takes us to stage 2? I thought that we’d have to do it again.”
That’s because you don’t know jack shit about the game, Erin.
5:00 – “Oh look!”
She’s surprised by the “cute” aeroplane that one plays on stage 2. In spite of the fact that she got to stage 2 back when she played the game eight days ago, for 12 minutes, on stream, for money. She just forgot, I guess.
Then she makes a Parodius reference. This is a game which she played on stream, for money. Of course.
She also makes a reference to Antarctic Adventure. This is a game that she played in this same “variety stream”, for the first time ever, briefly. And she calls the game “Arctic Adventure” instead of it’s proper title Antarctic Adventure. Totally different place, Erin. 11,651 miles away. No penguins there either.
6:15 – “This is so stressful.”
Uh huh.
7:45 – “Thank you so much Rugzilla for gifting a sub to Sergio.”
Surely Sergio was already subscribed. Maybe this gives him another month or whatever.
And Erin failed the level. She doesn’t want to try it again because she claims that it “hurts” because she has to keep tapping the button. This is a carpal tunnel reference. But oddly, she hasn’t used the phrase “carpal tunnel” in quite a while. I think not since I did this review three months ago:
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2020/06/erin-officially-declares-that-she-has.html
She’s horrible at this game. I think I’m about done.
9:30 – “I didn’t know that this game would piss me off so much.”
I mean…she never played it before so this comment just doesn’t make sense.
Then there’s a power up with an “H” on it and she guesses that it’s for health. Even when it obviously changes her projectiles from bullets to missiles, she still goes on that it was probably a health power up. Doesn’t she see that the fucking projectiles changed?
Then she goes on a bizarre rant on high fructose corn syrup. She shits on people who are concerned about the health effects of this byproduct.
Has she been paid by the high fructose corn syrup lobby? America is the only country on earth where this frankenstein shit is sold. There’s loads of weird chemical food that’s sold in the US which couldn’t be sold in any other country. Why not? Because in other countries, there are governments which aren’t COMPLETELY beholden to the corporations. But in the US, if somebody is making money, go do it. Who cares about the health of the chattle?
“I haven’t thought about those commercials for a very long time.”
She’s actually *nostalgic* for those public service announcements. Or so she suggests.
You know what I’m *nostalgic* for? Sugar. Back when I was a kid, all the candy had sugar. It was great. But then some time in the fabulous “the 90s” it all became high fructose corn syrup. Why? Because it’s cheaper. These people want to save PENNIES so they do everything they can to reduce costs.
What the fuck is this shit? High fructose corn syrup? I don’t want that. I don’t want some lab grown shit in my food. Aside from the health concerns, it changes the taste. And not for the better.
They don’t use this shit outside of the US. Why not? If high fructose corn syrup is so amazing, why isn’t every country on earth adopting it?
11:15 – She finishes the level and isn’t sure if she beat it or not. Because she’s an idiot who doesn’t understand how this meter works. I’ve figured it out and I only know about it from Erin playing this game briefly, on stream, for money.
11:30 – “Yes, this is an Epcot shirt. It says ‘1982’”
Erin is so *nostalgic* for…seven years before she was born. What does she remember from seven years before she was born?
11:45 – Some fucking moron asks Erin what a Famicom is.
Wait a minute. Maybe he’s actually doing something clever. Maybe he’s feigning ignorance to test Erin’s “gaming” knowledge with such a simple question.
“Well, in Japan there was Famicom, and in America and everywhere else there was Nintendo.”
Wait. I thought she was going somewhere with this but that’s it. That’s all she says.
If the systems are identical, which effectively they are, why even make the distinction? Why does Erin insist on saying “Famicom” when playing a Japanese Nintendo game? Why not just say, “I’m playing a Japanese Nintendo game”?
She does the same thing with TurboGrafx by saying “PC Engine” when talking about Japanese games. Actually, she might say “PC Engine” for US games too.
One could argue that a Famicom is different from an NES based on the minor technical differences, the controller that can’t be removed, the different case, whatever. And I thought that she was in this camp because she always says “Famicom”.
But no. She doesn’t even know any of this shit. So why does she say “Famicom”?
The Genesis was called the Mega Drive in Japan (and I think every territory other than the US) but nobody says, “I’m playing the Mega Drive” when they’re playing a Japanese Genesis game.
There’s a similar situation for most every console. The console sold in Japan has slightly different technical specifications and might even be called by a different name but it’s basically the same thing as the American version. So people don’t say, “I’m playing the Dreamcast with the blue swirl” when they’re playing a Japanese Dreamcast game. But for whatever reason, Famicom and PC Engine are treated special.
And again, Erin does not even know this. She clearly has no knowledge whatsoever about the differences between the NES and the Famicom. Just look at her ridiculous answer.
So why not just say, “I’m playing Yume Penguin Monogatari on the NES?” Why not put “NES” in the parenthetical of her title instead of “Famicom”?
Because she has a hazy idea that this is what “gamers” say. “Gamers” say “Famicom”.
She doesn’t have a fucking clue.
12:15 – “Look at the little flying candy! Oh my god! You’re cute! Look at the little orange slice! This is adorable!”
I’m done.