https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTynAV7iRfE
What the fuck? 50 minutes?
OH! This is her virtual panel that she did the for the virtual nerd convention. I talked about it here:
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2020/08/news-eiyuden-chronicle-hundred-heroes.html
You probably missed it because it was a Pelvic Gamer post but it’s at the end. There was an online nerd convention and Retro Ali, Bobdunga, and Madam Fomo were scheduled to do like…presentations. I’m not sure if Bobdunga actually fulfilled her obligation. She was too busy trying to ruin the reputation of homosexual ex-boyfriends of hers.
So yeah, let’s check this out. This was $10. Ten bucks to see a bunch of Youtube nobodies talk about stupid shit that nobody cares about.
This is brutal. Ali is so awkward. All of her interactions with this guy are terrible. Same with her audience interactions.
5:45 – Look at this. What the fuck? Ali starts drinking from like a Big Gulp-sized cup of water. Or something. And it’s like one of those bottles that you have to like…suck on.
Earlier in the stream, the guy took a sip of water from a small glass.
This really separates from the pros from the amateurs. I get it. Your mouth gets dry. This is going to be an hour. You want something to drink.
Here’s what you do: get a jug of water and a small glass. You take sips of water when required. When the water starts getting low, you re-fill it from the jug.
This is class. People would be thinking, “Wow. So sophisticated. A jug!”.
Instead, we get Retro Ali sucking on a giant baby bottle while making a stupid face.
Oh, by the way, this video is about some kiosk in a now defunct Pokemon store in New York. The kiosk allowed one to obtain Pokemon with a “special” “trained by the Pokemon Center” message on them. Or something. And there was some animation that looped in this kiosk.
So this guy (and possibly Retro Ali has some small part to play in this) wanted to preserve this animation and…something. It seems really, really trivial. But whatever. Fifty minutes of this.
8:00 – Over to you, Ali. At an insane rate of speech. And she’s reading so it’s even faster than usual.
I’m 20 minutes in. It’s boring as shit. They’re talking about some…Pokemon…thing? I don’t know.
If I would have spent ten bucks on this, I would have been so pissed off. There’s going to be questions from the audience later, apparently. Maybe something interesting will happen then. MAYBE. But I’m not holding out much hope.
35:00 – They start talking about how the guy who saved (it’s suggested that he stole it) this crap from the Pokemon Center lost a lot of it because his girlfriend made him get rid of it. It makes some sense. What sane adult woman wants a three foot Pokemon statue in her home? But she must have been really pissed off with this shit because she also apparently erased some save game data.
39:00 – Then this guy starts giving relationship advice.
These people aren’t living in reality. Let me break it down for you. If your home is full of Pokemon shit, you’re making a commitment: a commitment to being single for the rest of your life. That’s just the reality.
People talk about “being yourself” and “finding someone who accepts you”. No. Forget it. It’s not happening. Certainly not if the “real you” is a Pokemon-obsessed giant nerd.
At the very least, don’t mention this shit on the first date. Or on your Tinder profile. Save this shit until you’re in a relationship and she’s invested some time into this.
I saw a documentary of a guy who had a bunch of sex dolls and he invited some woman over to see them. They had been dating. And she was clearly creeped the fuck out. She stopped returning his phone calls after that.
Same thing with Pokemon. Indeed, it’s probably worse. But if you must have this shit, you have to ease the woman into this. Drop subtle hints. Don’t immediately invite her over to see your giant Pokemon collection.
Pat the NES Punk told a story about this. He’d invite women to his place, they’d see his huge video game collection, and they’d immediately disappear.
It’s true. What woman is going to tolerate this shit? Your value in the dating market goes down significantly when you have giant nerd collections like this. Why devalue yourself? Without the Pokemon collection, you might be able to get some hot, big titted woman. With the collection, you’re relegating yourself to 300 pounders. Is it really worth it?
Anyway, that’s the video. I watched almost all of it. I couldn’t get through the last ten minutes or so. They had long since stopped talking about this Pokemon Center anyway. There was talk about some Japanese airline company giving away a Gamecube that had their logo on it and the logo kind of looks like “ANAL”. I guess. But these two losers found this really hilarious. It doesn’t even look like “ANAL” but this guy was looking for an excuse to have some nerdy sexual “banter” with Ali. I had to turn it off.
So yeah. Ten bucks. Ten bucks to hear Retro Ali and this Hard4Games guy talk about…nothing. There’s probably a strict “no refund” policy too. Outrageous. This was a fucking scam.
Who the fuck would go to these nerd conventions? I mean, if you’re trying to pick up a fat chick, maybe. But even then…you’re competing with…I mean…there’s probably a 20 to 1 male to female ratio at these things. These fat chicks are spoiled for choice.