This is my favourite thing that James has ever done.  I mean, he fucking ruined it but it’s an example of raw, unrestricted James Rolfe.  It’s a window into what he really thinks.  As it turns out, poop is the main thing that he thinks about.

The series was supposed to be about nitpicking various nerd culture topics.

So every week or so, they’d upload a new episode on the Cinemassacre website.  The comment section was brutal.  EVERYONE hated this shit.  And this was at a time when everyone was leaving very positive, “We love AVGN” messages.  No.  Not even his diehard “fans” could support this.

Looking back, you just feel so bad for everyone who was involved in this.  It was made by a Philadelphia-based “comedy” team called Cinevore.  You didn’t know this at the time because James and/or Mike presented this as a Cinemassacre production.  But no, this was a Cinevore thing and they just hired James and Mike, I guess, to increase views.  This was the only remotely popular thing that they ever made.

You watch these things and the non-James and Mike team are really trying.  They’re trying to come up with logical, intelligent, and funny things to say about Batman, for example.  Then James Rolfe opens his mouth and says “POOP!”  No matter what the topic is.  “POOP!”  And people just have to go with it.  He completely derails everything with this constant faecal obsession.

Why did nobody stop him?  Why did nobody take him aside and say, “James, we know you like poo but you’ve introduced that topic in the last five episodes.  Can you try something else this time?”  No, just let him ruin the show with this autistic obsession.

We know now that James doesn’t enjoy working.  Maybe that partly explains what we see in these videos.  He didn’t want to sit down and think of good, clever, funny things to talk about.  Just go in and talk about shit.  Shit is funny, right?  I’ll use that for every fucking video.

There were 14 or 15 episodes (depending how you count them) plus some “bonus” videos.  Then it died after a long, painful struggle.  I haven’t watched all of these.  So let’s check it out.

OverAnalyzers: Sneak Preview Interview with James Rolfe (AVGN)

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cOPeSGCHQb0

The woman in these videos (Stephanie Yuhas) appears “in character” (doing a fake Hungarian accent or something) and says that they just “premiered” OverAnalyzers in some bar in Philadelphia.  They’re “on location”.  It’s all slickly produced, you see multi-ethnic, multi-racial, urban Philadelphia, there’s a fat goth chick having fun on a bar stool, there’s some kind of public domain hip hop playing, shit like this.

1:00 – James says, “This whole thing started from — Mike and I always have the stupidest conversations, and they’re hilarious sometimes, and we decided, “Why not get some more people in and just record these conversations and see if the rest of the world thinks they’re funny too.”

Spoiler alert: the rest of the world did not.  But interesting that it was apparently James and/or Mike hiring Cinevore and not the other way around.

“If they don’t, then there’s not much of a loss.”

What are you talking about?  For one thing, it damages your reputation.  But of much greater importance is that James ruined these people’s careers.  I’m not saying that they would have been comedy superstars were it not for the awful OverAnalyzers but who knows?  Maybe they could have done something with it.  But James had to ruin it with the shit talk.

Then Ms Yuhas says that it’s only semi-improv and they actually write scripts.  She goes on to say that James’ job is to “de-funk” their writing.  This is pretty accurate.  The rest of the cast do clearly have scripts or outlines at the very least and then there’s just James, with no script, no outline, no preparation, and he starts talking about doo doo.

2:00 – She goes on to say, “I could never even in a million years fathom what you have to say.”

Spoiler: he talks about poo.

2:15 – James says, “You come in and the best stuff comes out when you’re not even thinking about it.  You’re just having a regular conversation”.

Yeah.  This is normal for him.  Wait for these “normal” conversations that he has.

2:45 – Black hipster man having a shot with a white hipster man.  Tell me that shit isn’t set up.

There’s also a brief shot of Ryan with a glow stick around his neck.  This was released in 2011 so Ryan must have been around for a long time.

So that was the teaser.

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – Batman & Robin

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r9XTnXeuU2A

No poop references but it ends with an extended monologue from James talking about alternate dimensions (another favourite topic of his) at length and then everyone looking uncomfortable and somebody saying, “What the hell just happened?”

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – The Easter Bunny

It’s about why does the Easter Bunny lay eggs.  For the first minute, the discussion is about what gender is the Easter Bunny and why does a rabbit lay eggs.  Fine.

1:00 – Then Mike says, “Is the egg that comes out of the Easter Bunny’s ass painted already?” which gives James the green light to talk about shit.

James responds with, “No, we paint those after they come out of the Easter Bunny’s ass.”

Then the bearded guy says that the Easter Bunny is “laying turds” and “he markets his turds to children to eat them.”

James responds with, “They’re shit seekers.  They’re seeking the Easter Bunny’s shit.”

Then the other guy talks about if the Easter Bunny is only marketing his shit to Christian children.  At least one of the people involved in this thing is Jewish, by the way.  The bearded guy.  I suspect that the woman is as well.

Yeah.  Then the bearded guy describes the Jewish version of the Easter Bunny who “poops chocolate coins”.

The woman says, “That would explain the taste.”

She goes on to suggest that there’s an actual chicken inside of the Easter Bunny’s ass who is the one who’s actually laying the eggs.  This makes James Rolfe sexually excited and he wants to hear more.  She obliges.

Mike says, “Who put the hen up the bunny’s ass?”  He goes on to suggest that it was Satan.

Then the other guy (I don’t know their names, sorry) suggests that it’s like in Alien where somebody implanted the eggs.

James says, “So instead of a face hugger, it’s an ass hugger.”

3:15 – Mike wipes his nose.  Terrible editing.

So that was that.  We can probably blame Mike for starting this.  It started off fine but then the poop talk began.

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – Transformers

These are robots, right?  They don’t defecate.  NO WAY is James going to talk about shit here.  Just you wait.

2:15 – Mike asks what’s inside of Optimus Prime’s trailer.  James can hardly wait for the question to finish.  “What’s inside the trailer is fly shit, obviously.  Because there’s people who have jobs picking fly shit out of pepper while wearing boxing gloves.”

You know how in improv you’re supposed to react to what the other person says?  How the fuck can you respond to this?  So again, everyone just looks confused at this stupid, autistic shit that James is saying.

So James continues, “So Prime’s trailer is full of fly shit and other trailers are full of pepper and the fly shit and the pepper all go to the same factory.”

Mike interrupts.  “So there’s other trailers full of pepper?”

James responds, “Yeah, there’s trailers just full of pepper, yeah.”

The woman says, “What kind of pepper?”

James says, “The pepper that you use as seasoning”

It’s true.  I didn’t understand what he was talking about either.  Does he mean the vegetable or the seasoning?  But James doesn’t seem to know that there even is a vegetable.

Everyone is still really uncomfortable.  James continues, “So basically they got all this pepper in this truck and then they’ve got fly shit in other trucks.  They bring them all to the same factory so, you know, they get all mixed up.  They need people to pick the fly shit out of the pepper because it all looks the same so they get — usually it’s boxers who are having a boxing match that same day.  Because what do they do during the rest of the day?  They just, you know, have some time.  So basically, they come there and they have their boxing gloves already and that’s why they — which is very hard.  It’s very hard to pick the shit out of the pepper while wearing the boxing gloves.”

Shot of legitimately pissed off co-stars.

James continues, “But also they like to get shit on their hands for when they punch they other guy they got shitty gloves.”

Then the non-bearded guy tries to clarify this but…it’s stupid.  Then other people start talking about a trailer full of shit.  And none of it makes sense.  None of it is funny.

After a while, James actually tries to change the subject away from shit but Mike keeps bringing it back so that’s what the entire episode is about.

This whole thing stems from something James’ grandfather said.  “This is more difficult than picking fly shit out of pepper while wearing boxing gloves” or something.  It’s important that grandparents impart their wisdom on the younger generations.  This is what James got.

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – Ernest

No poop talk.  They also just conclude, without any real reason, that Ernest is a god.

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – TMNT Krang

1:30 – They quickly start discussing whether or not Krang’s android body needs to eat.  So the one guy says, “Does it need to eat?  I mean –” and is immediately interrupted by James Rolfe.  “What about when it goes to the bathroom?”

Bearded Guy: Does one of the levers do that?  Is it like soft serve ice cream?

James: Wow.  So he just takes a lever and basically pulls the lever and then (blows raspberry) and that just squeezes it all out.  It basically goes into the body, like into a tube or something, and then that goes into the android part, and then he does the lever just to shit it out.

Woman: So it’s like a double poop?  First it’s a regular poop and then it’s an android poop?

James: It’s not very efficient.

Then they get away from poo for a little while.  For the most part, anyway.  Then it’s more of the same:

4:15: Woman: What if he accidentally mixed up the eating lever with the shitting lever?

Mike: Then he’d have a big mess on his hands and a foot soldier would have to come along and clean it up.

James: Imagine having to piss out of your mouth.  You’d have to do a handstand on the toilet.

Mike: Maybe that’s what the eyeball is on top.  Maybe the eyeball is the bathroom.

James: Well, there’s bathrooms in Epcot Center so there have to be in the Technodrome.

Most of this doesn’t even make sense.  So that’s the Krang episode.  It was about poop.

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – TMNT Money

Immediately starts with Mike theorising that the Ninja Turtles get their money from people dropping money in the sewers.  And the money all collects at a certain point in the sewers.  The Turtles then fish that money out, which of course is all covered in shit.  The one guy suggests that the pizza place getting this shit-covered money would not be happy and Mike agrees.

I’m starting to realise that it’s not always James who is starting these poop discussions.  It’s often Mike.  James didn’t even contribute to the poop talk in this episode.

OverAnalyzers (with AVGN) – Dracula’s Cape

1:30 – Mike asks where Link’s items go.  This doesn’t follow from anything that was said previously.

James:  “Just shoves it up his ass?”

Mike: I guess that’s what it is.  He just put it up his ass.

James: Dracula puts it all up his ass.

Mike: No, that’s wrong.  It won’t be a human because it turns into a bat so the clothes have to go up the bat’s ass.

Woman: But then wouldn’t bat shit get all over it?

Mike: (taken aback) Yeah.  I think so.

Nerdy Guy: So then Dracula is trying to seduce people and he’s walking around smelling like bat shit?

Mike: Maybe that’s why all the women scream, not because he’s going to suck their blood.  Because how are they going to know he’s going to suck…it’s just a guy coming closer and closer.  They’re screaming because he smells like shit.

Jewish Guy: In Eastern Europe, hundreds of years ago, they might not have even noticed somebody smell…everybody smelled like bat ass.

Nerdy Guy: If Dracula doesn’t like the smell of garlic, like he’s probably got a heightened sense of smell, so he might not want to walk around smelling his own asshole.

James: Vampires: they have to sleep in their own native soil.  What if that’s what it is?  They just soil themselves.  They sleep in just bat shit.

Mike: Oh, so now the coffin is full of bat faeces.

James: The coffin is full of bat faeces.

Woman: I don’t think any of this is true because you’d see little speckles of bat shit over the clothes.  He looks like a very nice looking man.

Mike: He looks like proper and clean.

Then somehow this woman is FINALLY able to change the topic.  I transcribed basically the whole fucking episode.  Almost the entire episode is about shit.

Then, after a brief respite, they get back on the topic of doo doo.

Nerdy Guy: It’s either that or he’s walking around smelling like bat ass.

James: Bat ass.

3:45 – James then rips off the Calvin & Hobbes comic where the father talks about how the world used to be in black and white.  You can read it here:

http://calvin-and-hobbes-comic-strips.blogspot.com/2011/11/calvin-asks-dad-about-old-black-and.html

In the recent Garfield Kart James and Mike Mondays, James stated that he enjoyed reading Calvin & Hobbes.  So this is no coincidence.  He just ripped this off.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yw2zjNWquWg

That’s the video.  How much more of this shit do I have to do?  Ten more fucking videos.  I’ll have to do this in two parts then.

Fucking unbelievable.  Dracula’s cape.  This was obviously a topic that James wanted to do.  And when I first heard this, I thought, “NO WAY are they going to talk about shit in this episode.  How can they?”  But they found a way.  There’s always a way to talk about poop when James is in the room.  And Mike, apparently.