https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l7OehZH8FH4
Part 1 here:
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2022/09/erin-plays-and-mike-matei-stream-fall.html
30:00 – “This is pissing me off so much! But it’s fun.”
She has no interest in this whatsoever.
31:00 – Mike is going through all the shit you can unlock. There are 100 levels. You probably have to play the game for thousands of hours to unlock all of this shit. But Mike suggests that they can do it. Erin agrees.
Yeah. It’s not happening, Mike. She does not play video games unless it’s on stream, for money.
38:45 – Erin says, “I remember the Valheim streams. Those were comfy — when you were streaming Valheim.”
Mike just ignores this complete idiocy.
41:15 – Somebody in the chat asks Erin what people buy at Woolworth’s. I guess that this is a reference to her recent mindless tweet where she said that she doesn’t even remember going to Woolworth’s but “it was fun”.
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2022/08/erin-getting-nostalgic-about-woolworths.html
So Mike, knowing that Erin has no idea, says, “Yeah, what do they buy at Woolworth’s?” He’s setting her up for failure.
Erin’s answer is that she was very young when it closed but she remembers “candle blow molds.” I don’t even want to know what that is.
Then Mike re-tells his riveting story about how he used to sit on stools while in Woolworth. Erin thinks that this is awesome and wishes that she could have done something like that. She’s never done ANYTHING so these are the non-stories that you get from her.
42:00 – Somebody says that Woolworth’s is still open in Australia. Erin’s response: “That’s cool”.
Anyway, now it’s Erin’s turn. Let’s see if she can get past the first level.
It’s the same level that she had the first two times she played this today with all of the spinning blades. So she should be pretty familiar with it now.
She’s constantly jumping. Right. That helps.
43:45 – Mike is talking about something called “Hess NES games” that were released in Australia. And then he’s trying to remember what they were called in Asia and Erin says, “I forget.”
I DON’T EVEN KNOW WHAT THE FUCK HE’S TALKING ABOUT! This is extremely obscure bullshit that NOBODY cares about. But Erin is pretending that she knows what he’s talking about. But she just “forgot” what these things were called in Asia. Whatever they even are. Erin “always” “forgets” what these things are, whatever they are.
“In Spain, they were Gluck”.
No fucking idea what he’s talking about. But Erin occasionally chimes in with, “I don’t remember either.”
Well, no shit. What on earth is he fucking talking about? But Erin is pretending that she’s following along.
44:30 – Erin got fifth place because early in the map, she got flung across like half of the map. So by sheer luck, she got a huge lead on everyone early on. She thinks that this is skill. No. She fucked up and by happenstance, it was advantageous.
44:45 – Mike says “Sachin” and Erin just looks at him blankly for a while. Then he starts to explain that this is what these games, or whatever they are, were called in Asia. So Erin pretends to know what he’s talking about at this point. Oh, yeah. Sachin. Of course. And Gluck. And Hess. I know what you mean Mike. Video games.
She actually says, “Okay, that sounds right.”
WHAT IN THE NAME OF FUCK IS MIKE TALKING ABOUT? I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA.
But Erin does. Erin is following all of this.
I’d like to see Mike just totally make something up and watch Erin pretend to know what he’s talking about. Is that what he’s doing now? I don’t even know.
45:15 – A horntard says that Fall Guys is a smooth running game. So Mike says, “Yeah, it’s Epic Games.” Erin says, “Yeah, we’re not playing on Switch or anything.”
What? Isn’t the game available on Switch?
Yes. It is. And the publisher is Epic Games. That’s what he was talking about. The publisher. He’s saying that Epic is a good company who releases stable games that run smoothly.
But Erin thinks that this was a comment on…the Epic Game store? She thinks that the Epic Game store is like…god, this is so retarded that I can’t even put it into words. But like…if you play a game on Steam, it’s going to play differently than if you play it on the Epic Game store. Or something. No. God, she’s a fucking moron. Let’s move on.
45:30 – A horntard asks Erin what her favourite Famicom-exclusive game is. She doesn’t know. OF COURSE. Maybe the chat can prompt her.
“I like the Famicom version of Dracula’s Curse.”
Oh my fucking god. I don’t even want to get into it. Let’s just move on. She doesn’t know anything about video games. Everything has to be a reference to something that she did on stream, for money.
46:30 – “I like the one with the penguins.”
Just stop racking your brain over this bullshit. All she’s doing is digging herself deeper into this hole of idiocy.
Erin is REALLY bad at this game. There are two spinning blades. You have to jump over the bottom one and avoid the top one. And she’s just running around chasing the top blade. For no reason. Nobody else is doing this.
Then Erin mentions some more games that she played once, on stream, for money. Sexy Parodius, for example.
Somehow, Erin got past this level.
48:15 – Now a horntard is asking Erin about her thoughts about Batman Forever: The Arcade Game.
SHE DOESN’T HAVE ANY THOUGHTS ON IT, YOU RETARD. SHE DOESN’T KNOW THE GAME. WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU? WHY ARE YOU ASKING THESE QUESTIONS?
And why does Erin read them? Why does she set herself up for failure?
“I don’t know if I’ve played that one.”
You don’t say. Fuck off.
49:15 – She got through this round too. Then she says, “Yeah! I survived.”
The word “survived” appeared on screen so that’s why she said “survived”. This is a common coping strategy with Erin. If she sees a word in a video game or on a Star Trek t-shirt or whatever, she’ll read it to try to fool people into thinking that she knows what she’s talking about.
Then a horntard gives her the name of that penguin game. It’s a Japanese game that nobody on earth would ever remember. But Erin says that she “always” “forgets” the name. Well, no shit. She could be forgiven for “forgetting” the name of this game. It’s entirely in Japanese. But she’s “always” “forgetting” this name. Because that Japanese penguin game is just always coming up in conversation with Erin, I guess.
51:15 – So Erin lost but she got to the last round. She was terrible at it, as usual. And never saw the level before.
52:30 – Now it’s Mike’s turn again.
They’re talking about Doom skins in the game. Mike doesn’t know if you have pay real money for them or what. He says that you should be able to unlock them from playing the game a lot.
Ummm. No? That’s not how these games work. This is typical with these free games. They want you to spend money on them.
But of course Erin agrees. Because she has no fucking clue.
Then Erin says that she wants one of these Doom skins. WHY? She doesn’t play the fucking game. So now Mike is going to have to shell out real money for a Doom skin for a game that Erin doesn’t even play. What’s the fucking point? Just so she can say, “That’s cute” and then never play the game? It’s idiotic.
53:15 – She’s reading from the chat. “The real name of (some game) is (some other name). Oh, okay. That’s cool.”
She has no fucking clue what he’s talking about. Neither do I. So she just trots out her usual, “That’s cool”.
Then Mike starts talking about the game and Erin pretends to know what the game is. She clearly does not.
56:15 – A horntard says, “Sea of Thieves has the best water.” Erin says, “You mean taste? Because I hear people say that Starbucks has the best water. Oh, you mean like in the game. What it looks like. Oh.”
Holy shit. An actual joke with a setup and punchline and everything. Watch out, Jim Gaffigan.
You know, I was watching a recent Jim Gaffigan comedy “special”. It was from Netflix or something. I think that it was released in 2021. I’ve enjoyed his bacon-based comedy over the years so I thought I’d check it out.
No, this was bad. It was about covid and the importance of wearing masks and his contempt for Donald Trump and shit like this. We don’t fucking care. Can you get to bacon, please? Do you prefer smoked bacon or unsmoked bacon?
The bacon they have in the US is such fucking shit. Let me look for some pictures.
Here’s a picture that I’ve Newt Wallen’d from the internet. Obviously, the person who made this has a bias but ignore the labels. The pictures are accurate.
What would you rather eat? These charred strips of mystery meat or an actual meat product?
And if you do want these thin strips that you burn to a crisp, you can buy them in the UK. They’re sold as “streaky bacon”. Nobody buys it but the option is there for tourists or the mentally ill or whoever wants this shit.
But if you want actual bacon in the US, you’re out of luck. These burnt strips are all you can get.
It’s a different cut. It’s a different part of the pig. I don’t know the specifics. I’m not a butcher. But the British bacon has like the top 2/3 of the bacon (the fat part) from one part of the pig and the last 1/3 of the bacon is from another part. Obviously, an adjacent part. And that last 1/3 is a thin strip like what’s sold in the US.
In the US, it’s only this thin strip that they sell. Not the fat 2/3 of the bacon that one gets in the UK.
I believe that Canadian bacon only uses this fat part of the pig. That’s why it’s just round. But with the British bacon, you get the best of both worlds.
Anyway, back to Erin Plays.
57:15 – Mike got first place again. He’s really in the zone. He’s pwning these 10 year olds.
Erin is still talking about Starbucks, by the way. Different beverages that she likes. I don’t give a fuck.
59:45 – Erin is reading from the chat. “Is it true that coffee in American isn’t good? That’s what I’ve been told.”
No, you faggot. You’re thinking of bacon.
And how would Erin know? She’s never left the country. She never even left California before she moved in with Mike. And she goes back to California twice a month to visit her parents She’s like 35 year old
“I mean, I can’t compare it to anything else because I’ve only been in America”
See?
Then Mike starts talking about pizza in Italy It’s different from pizza in the US. Great.
1:01:45 – They’re talking about how Domino’s didn’t do well in Italy. Mike says that he thinks that people in Italy don’t like pizzeria chains. Then Erin says, “Even in America, different regions are different.”
Now, I wouldn’t mention this but then Erin gets really self-conscious about this and starts making what I assume are veiled references to the blog.
1:03:00 – “Sometimes I say things stupidly. It’s a live-stream. If I was typing things out, it would be better.”
Oh. Like her riveting story about Woolworth’s.
Then Mike uses a “dur dur idiot” voice and says, “I will be using this against you for the rest of your life. I also have absolutely nothing going on.”
Erin says, “There’s somebody watching and they’re going to be adding that to my ‘I hate Erin’ folder.”
Mike replies, “This will be going in the archives.”
It has to be a reference to me because I say “Let me check the archives” when I look stuff up on my blog. It’s obviously said in a jokey fashion but they’re not picking up on the nuance.
But yeah, Erin always seems to get worked up over things that…are completely trivial. Like this “different regions are different” thing. I didn’t even see anything wrong with that remark.
But the MASSIVE things that she gets wrong…she doesn’t see the problem.
1:04:15 – Mike got second place. That’s the end. It’s Erin’s turn. We can start there next time.
Next parts:
This is the amount of effort you have to put into life if you're a girl who is somewhat above 2/10. Just bullshit everything and simps will carry you.
Why the fuck are they playing FALL GUYS now when its popularity faded like 2 years ago? Is it because it's on Gamepass so Mike can play it for “free”? It was free on PS4 on release. Maybe they'll play fucking Among Us next.Also I got a good one for you, because Horseface started an OnlyFans (I know it's Fansly but who gives a fuck it's just a site for prostitutes) you can now officially call her Whoreface haha.