https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nN8vTnT61zg
0:00 – Oh, hello, Mr Greenscreen. We’re off to a great start.
I HATE the greenscreen. In everything. But Autism Boy over here can’t get enough of it.
1:00 – “Which Top Gun 2 is better: the game or the movie.”
I’m reminded of an idiotic question that I posed as a child: “Which is better: The Wizard of Oz or The Wizard of Id?”
For those might not be familiar, The Wizard of Id was an unremarkable and unfunny newspaper comic strip from…I don’t know. At least from the 1980s and 1990s but it had probably goes back further. Let me look this up. I’ll guess that it started in 1976.
No. It started in 1964. It’s still being made today, apparently, although the original co-creator (Brant Parker) died in 2007. In 1997, his son took over illustrating for the comic. And in 2007, Brant Parker’s grandson took over writing the comic.
It’s a “zombie comic”, as they call it. A totally unfunny, unimaginative comic strip that continues after the original creator’s death and exists solely to make money.
But we’re talking about newspaper comic strips. Who even cares any more? Nobody is buying newspapers. And is anyone going to The Wizard of Id website to get their daily dose of unfunny bullshit? No.
Johnny Hart was the other co-creator of The Wizard of Id. You might remember him from another painfully unfunny comic: BC.
What’s the comic about? I don’t even remember. There was the titular wizard and a midget king and some other medieval bullshit and I never so much as cracked a smile when reading this shit. But I read it semi-regularly for…I don’t know…ten years? Maybe 15 years. There were a bunch of these unfunny zombie comics that I’d read regularly just because they only had a few words. Shit like Hagar the Horrible, Hi and Lois, and Beetle Bailey.
So that’s The Wizard of Id. And my question, asked as a 10 year old, implored the listener to compare that piece of shit comic strip to the 1939 classic film The Wizard of Oz. Just because the two things had similar names.
People refused to play along. “We can’t compare the two. They’re completely different things.”
That’s true, but in this case, I think that we can all safely say that The Wizard of Oz is better than The Wizard of Id.
Anyway, Jimmy is posing a similar idiotic question. I was 10 when I asked this so that’s my excuse. James Rolfe is 40 years old.
1:15 – Oh my god. He’s going to break this down into eight categories. Hello, autism.
1:45 – James says that Top Gun: Maverick, “Kicked my ass so hard, I got shits for brains.”
Uh huh. Moronic scat references.
He suggests that the film was so good that it could have waited another 60 years.
Oh right. So that a 119 year old Tom Cruise could play a fighter pilot. This is fucking idiotic.
This is so fucking bad. He’s going into the minutia of a video game that nobody cares about. I didn’t even know that this game existed.
5:00 – I’m already done with this. It’s not funny. It’s stupid.
I’ll try to press on.
He’s comparing the plot and the acting. It’s fucking stupid. Of course there’s not going to be any plot or acting in the video game.
Oh fuck. Special effects. Sound. This is just a painfully exercise to shit on the video game. Yes, a game from 30 years ago isn’t going to have better acting or special effects than a modern movie. What are you, fucking retarded?
Oh. He is.
9:30 – He says that reviewing movies is easier than reviewing video games. Probably why he’s been reviewing so many movies of late. Lazy, special education dope.
10:00 – The pause feature. This is some autistic fixation for Jimmy.
He says that the game doesn’t have a pause feature but neither does the movie because it’s only being shows in cinemas.
But then he says that eventually the movie will be released digitally or on blueray or whatever so it will have a pause feature. So the movie wins.
Hey, moron, what about playing the game on an emulator? You can pause as much as you want. Jimmy never used an emulator in his life.
10:45 – “With all joking aside, Maverick is good. Really good. Like better than it needs to be. Better than the first Top Gun. One of the best sequels I’ve seen to anything with that long of a gap. It’s one of those movies that makes you feel alive.”
That’s the entirety of his review. This is the only thing that he said about the movie. “It was good.”
He’s no Gene Siskel. He’s not even Gene Shalit.
Absolute shit. What the fuck was this video?
Let’s see what the boys on Reddit had to say.
– “The joke ran its course and was dead by the 3rd category. Clicked off after. Like okay we get it, but the delivery was so bad. Why even use this guy any more?”
Yeah, that sums up my view.
– “I like the idea, but he could have went into more detail about the main characters, like he used to do in his old Spike reviews.”
Yeah. He could have reviewed the fucking movie. Like at all. All he said was, “It’s good”. What kind of fucking review is this?
There’s absolutely no hope for this channel. He’s completely doomed. Now what is he going to do? Get a job at Wawa?
He had a good run. Ten years without working? Fifteen? But pretty soon he’s going to have to go look for a job. I’m sure that he some savings but he has two kids and a wife. He needs money coming in.