I haven’t been on Erin’s Twitter in a while. I’m so *nostalgic* for Erin’s boring as fuck Twitter.
“The script for my next video is taking 4ever but it IS coming. Had a lot going on that’s been quite draining. But for a positive-my gum graft stitches should be taken out next week so hopefully I’ll be able to smile again without looking like I have strange things in my teeth!”
What in the blue hell is this? Gum graft? Oh god. I regret looking this up. I hesitate to even describe it. If you’re at all queasy, just skip this article.
“Gum graft surgery is a dental procedure for treating thinning gums or gum recession. Gum grafting covers exposed teeth roots and adds volume to your gum line, improving overall oral health.”
WHY WOULD SHE GET THIS? WHO CARES ABOUT HER GUMS?
How much did Mike fucking pay for this shit? Let me look this up.
$3,000 per tooth. And they use gum tissue from cadavers. So Erin is walking around with a dead person’s gums. And how many gum areas were affected? Oh god. It’s fucking unbelievable. Mike dropped at least ten thousand bucks on this shit, I bet. FOR ZOMBIE GUMS.
You could have got breast implants for half that price. That’s something that would improve Erin’s look much more than fucking zombie gums. What the fuck are they doing? Why is every single choice that Erin makes the wrong one?
Do you want to see Erin with giant tits or with ZOMBIE GUMS? Or how much is a Brazilian butt lift? $6,500 on average. It just boggles the mind. GUMS are what she was concerned about. Has anybody EVER commented on Erin’s GUMS?
Then she says:
“The past year has sucked so I’m always worried people think Erin Plays is over (it’s SUPER not!)I know not everyone knows/cares about my “extras” channel so they prob think I’m totally MIA which stresses me out so yeah. I’m streaming and uploading there at least in the meantime!”
Erin, the channel is done. It’s dead. Much like your gums. You’ve come to the realization, finally, that nobody wants to watch a personality blackhole who knows nothing about video games playing video games. Why it took so long, who knows? Maybe she has a zombie brain too.
What about zombie tits? Let’s get some of those on there. Why isn’t this a procedure?
You can have internal organs from dead people, right? Heart, liver…well, let’s not just go on my donor organ knowledge. Let’s look it up.
Heart, lungs, liver, kidneys, pancreas, small bowel, cornea, skin, tendons, bone, hands, face, limbs, “womb”.
Get Erin a zombie bowel. We know how much Mike enjoys anal. Mix it up a little. Stick a new bowel in there.
Erin can go full on zombie. Replace everything possible with cadaver parts. Mike apparently has the money and isn’t afraid of completely flushing it down the toilet. GUMS is what she got. Untold thousands of dollars for this.
She’s a complete fucking moron.
“Random Erin lore: In high school we had to run a presidential campaign for a celebrity. We chose Gerard Way from My Chemical Romance and used a pic from the Ghost of You video to say he was in the invasion of Normandy.”
I don’t understand ANY of that. But bear in mind that this is somebody with a dead person’s gums.
“Gum graft update #2: Today I could finally drink out of a straw and have my Diet Coke â„¢. Sometimes when I laugh/smile too hard the stitches hurt, eating still is annoying but I’m getting closer to being functional when it comes to being Erin Plays, thankfully.”
I’m doing all of this in reverse chronological order so that was from a few weeks ago. Why does she think that anybody wants to hear about this? That’s another thing that’s completely baffling. Keep your disgusting zombie gums to yourself. Why would she advertise this? It’s not like anybody would know. She’s boasting about this. About having zombie gums.
“Gum graft update- feel shitty over all but I’ve been keeping up with the pain meds so that’s helped. Not being able to eat real food makes me feel nauseous and my gums look a bit frankensteined in the area but it’s pretty cool this procedure is even possible.”
It’s unbelievable. She describes the result as “frankensteined”. Because that’s what it is. Somebody dug up a corpse, cut the gums off, and put them on Erin’s rotted fucking gums. But why admit to this?
Even if it was relatively normal cosmetic surgery, people tend not to admit to getting the surgery. You get a nose job or something, people don’t want to admit to that. It’s personal business. But Erin is out there flapping her zombie gums about her absolutely vile treatment.
And HornyGoriya is out there wishing Erin a speedy recovery. She must REALLY be into Erin that she still wants to get in there even after hearing about the zombie gums.
“Hi! I’m getting gum grafting surgery today for receding gums and from what I see online, recovery if different for everyone. So I may not be able to stream for a bit depending on how healing goes. Yes, I’m scared lol. Learn from me- Don’t brush too hard and use a SOFT toothbrush!”
Is she retarded? Brushing too hard caused her to get fucked up gums?
Let me be clear here. There’s nothing wrong with Erin’s gums. Well, now there are. She has a corpse’s gums now. But before she did that completely insane thing, there was nothing wrong them. I don’t know exactly because I’m not looking at Erin’s fucking gums and gums are typically not a thing that you can really see on people but I’m just assuming that they were perfectly fine.
This is just some other weird obsession that she has like her “carpal tunnel syndrome” which is completely invented. It’s a mental health problem, not a medical problem. And Mike, instead of getting her the psychiatric help that she so clearly needs, enables her delusions and says, “Oh, sure, honey. Let’s get you some zombie gums. I was the puppetmaster of a retard for many years so have the cash to waste.”
In the responses, somebody asks if it’s cadaver tissue and Erin says that it’s from the roof of her mouth but I don’t care. I’m sticking with zombie gums.
Erin is a big Michelle Trachtenberg fan. Never mentioned her once. Mike should have splashed out to have Michelle Trachetenberg’s gums grafted onto Erin’s gums.
Is Erin still on Bluesky? Oh, yeah.
She needs the world to know about these zombie gums.
Mike is paying a lot of money to get some ‘dead head’.
It’s completely insane. Cosmetic GUM surgery? When there was nothing visibly wrong with her gums? She’s mentally ill.
Breast implants should definitely have been the way to go. What a wasted opportunity. And a collab with Newt would have been possible if those tits were from a dead serial killer or something.
By the way, did you watch her video titled “Going through a BIG box of games! NES, N64, SNES and more!”? I usually watch her videos after the review here, but this time, I could not make it very far. Even she seemed bored when creating that video.
Yeah, she could have filmed the breast enlargement surgery like Fallon and then appeared in the upcoming and totally happening “Booooobs” about the haunted breast implants that came from a serial killer.
I’m watching that box video now and I vaguely remember it. I remember it being mostly Castlevania videos so I must have seen at least part of it. I suspect that I fell asleep watching it.
why would the “script” for her next video be taking so long? does it take this much work to remark how cute something is or ask the viewer if he remembers something (usually 80’s-related)?
It is perplexing that she has a script for these things. I assume that it’s like Newt’s “creative” process. She shits something out, it’s god awful, and then she ends up just ad-libbing everything anyway.
I haven’t cried from laughing in a long time. Especially from just reading something, thank you sir.
Hey, thanks. I appreciate the feedback.