https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5op9WXl52q4
Two glorious hours of Erin playing a game for the first and last time ever. And I have to actually sit through this one because I skimmed this video in my free time and there are some real gems about her carpal tunnel syndrome.
0:00 – Oh, she’s wearing a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles shirt. Remember them? TMNT, as the kids called them? Erin is all about TMNT. As a 35 year old woman who wasn’t in the proper age demographic at any time when they were popular. And, let’s state the obvious, it was not a toy line or cartoon or movie aimed at girls. But Erin is pretending to be interested in them because that’s what she does. Everything she does is a lie.
0:15 – She’s playing this game because she finds the walk animation of the character to be cute.
0:30 – “I like that it’s called Pikachu Y2K. So I don’t know, maybe this takes place in 1999 and we have to stop the computer apocalypse.”
I don’t think that she’s joking. She doesn’t understand that “Y2K” was a term used for, I guess, the year 2000 well before the Y2K bug was an issue.
Then there’s an edit but I’m not going to check what she cut out because I don’t give a fuck.
4:00 – “That’s cool, Farrin.”
Farrin must have said something. It could have been anything. All that she ever says is, “That’s cool”.
4:15 – Somebody asks her about her birthday. “For my birthday, I didn’t do a tonne but I wanted to find that arcade cab so we just went to the Round One, it’s like an arcade chain, and I got to check that out: the Castlevania arcade machine. So that was cool. I was happy.”
That’s it. That’s the story. If you’d like to see a picture of this glorious day, she tweeted it:
https://twitter.com/ErinPlays_Games/status/1458527036671152132
She wore her Hamburglar top for her birthday. It was a special day, after all.
It makes no sense whatsoever. She’s not interested in this shit. And Mike knows this. It can’t be a fucking secret. So why didn’t she suggest doing something else for her birthday? Who does she think she’s fooling? Her entire life is a lie. And even though every non-retard around her KNOWS that she’s lying, she still tries to maintain the facade. Why? Just tell Mike that you want to go a nice restaurant for your birthday. You don’t need to pretend that you’re interested in video games.
Wow. John Riggs doesn’t leave a reply. He’s slipping. Well, hopefully he DM’d her his birthday well wishes. Same with Joe from Gamesack.
She keeps saying stuff like, “It’s been a while since I’ve played this” and “I’ve played this before”. Yeah. We know. ONCE. On stream, for money. But she doesn’t say that part. And that’s why she knows absolutely nothing about the game and she’s really bad at it.
For example, she says that she doesn’t know what the apples were in the Felix game. This game is just a sprite swap. She thinks that they were hearts. No. They were little icons of Felix the Cat. Anyone who played the game AT ALL would know this. It’s like not knowing that in Mario the things you collect are coins.
7:15 – “I used to love Felix the Cat on the NES, like when I started my channel but I’ve played, like, so many NES games since and my tastes have changed, like, in the past four years. How long have I been doing this? I don’t know.”
Oh yeah. That’s how memory works. Once you play too many games, you suddenly forget about games that you’ve played in the past.
She doesn’t know anything about the game because she played it ONCE. On stream, for money. But she’s saying that she “loves” the game. And she says it used to be in her top five games. This is how she speaks. It’s all a fucking lie.
7:45 – “I’m 34 now.”
Sure you are, Cykill1986.
8:00 – Somebody tells her that she started her channel almost five years ago. Then Erin starts her BORING AS FUCK monologue that she’s told MANY, MANY TIMES before.
“I started Erin Plays because I wanted a creative outlet. I was starting to dive deeper into, like, NES and stuff than I had previously in my life. I was like, “Oh, wouldn’t it be fun to do a video series of me, like, playing video games that were new to me?” or, you know, stuff like that. And here I am still doing it.”
It’s all a complete lie. She started the channel because she heard that women who play video games on the internet could make a lot of money. She was misinformed. So now she’s getting fucked in the ass by Mike Matei on the regular. For less than $10,000/year.
22:00 – She says that she took footage of that Castlevania arcade game because she’s going to use it for an upcoming video. That’s what this was about.
22:45 – “Will I do more videos with Hack the Movies? If he’ll have me on, I totally will.”
She was HORRENDOUS in her Talking About Tapes aka Hack the Movies debut. I reviewed that video here:
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2021/07/josie-and-pussycats-is-great-satire.html
Anything that Erin does with other people is really, really, incredibly bad. She gets exposed as a fraud instantly and repeatedly. I can’t understand why she continues to do these things.
26:00 – “Have I seen Next of Kin? No, I haven’t.”
Riveting stuff, Erin.
Oh and this was all during a discussion where Erin was talking about how much she loves the Paranormal Activity series and she’s been watching them with Mike. Paranormal Activity is, apparently, a movie series and Next of Kin is the latest chapter in this no doubt fantastic movie series.
Erin hasn’t seen it.
26:45 – “I’d probably like that Chucky series, the tv series. I’d probably like that.”
But she hasn’t seen it.
27:00 – “Did I get a bunch of video games for my birthday? No.”
Why would she? She’s not interested in that shit. But it is weird because that’s the story that she tells. She’s a big “gamer”, right? What’s a good gift for a “gamer”? Games. Erin didn’t get any.
So what did she get? She doesn’t say.
Then she reads something else and says, “I don’t know what that is. I’ve heard of it, though.”
Then we’re back to more shit tier gameplay of this game that she played once in her life.
29:45 – “I was showing Mike Buffy because he never saw it, so we watched Buffy.”
This is right after Erin talking about how I Know What You Did Last Summer was “so 90s” and she found it “comfy”.
Erin was 12 years old in 1999, if we use her official birthdate, or 13 if we use Cykill1986’s suggested birthdate. She hardly experienced the 1990s. She was a child. Why the constant lies? We can all do the arithmetic.
Then Erin talks about numerous other movies and tv shows that she’s never seen before but “wants to”.
37:15 – “There’s a lot movies I haven’t seen: horror movies or regular.”
Erin is a master of the understatement.
37:45 – “So I’d be on, like, Hack the Movies again if it’s something that I want to see or, like, or something I have something to say about.”
So that rules out any return to the show.
“And, you know, if they want me back.”
Please no. And she was HATED by the people in the comments.
38:00 – Oh my god. Then somebody gifted six subs but he doesn’t even know what this means. So Erin explains what it means. It’s basically, “You gave me money.”
This guy is so fucking retarded, LITERALLY RETARDED, that he doesn’t even know what he’s doing. He just gave money to Erin and doesn’t even realise it. And these gift subs are $5.00 each. He lost $30 and doesn’t even realise what he spent the money on. He probably thought that he was giving himself a six month subscription. And even that, he probably doesn’t know what it means.
Erin is taking money from these people. She doesn’t even offer a refund to this guy who clearly doesn’t know what he just did.
39:00 – “I like She’s All That a lot.”
I’ve gone over this before. This was my JOKE idea of a movie that Erin should “review” on Talking About Tapes. Tony from Hack the Movies then talked about this movie several times on his show, after reading my joke about it. I suspect that he then suggested to Erin that this be the movie that they review.
So now Erin is pretending that she’s all about She’s All That.
https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2021/05/batman-forever-is-fun-talking-about.html
44:00 – Erin goes on an extended and tedious monologue about colour schemes in 1980s malls. She acknowledges that she wasn’t even born at the time.
Then she talks about yet more movies that she’s never seen before. But she wants to.
55:15 – NewWaveJunkie says that he met some of the cast of Monster Squad at some movie screening. Anyone want to guess Erin’s response?
“That’s cool.”
57:30 – “Some people go, like, “Oh, you have Super Nintendo growing up. How come you didn’t play Castlevania (pause) 4?” That shit didn’t appeal to me when I was little. Everything had to be cute.”
How have things changed? And why did she suddenly become interested in Castlevania as a 30 year old woman, when she started playing games for her shitty Youtube channel?
“I was playing, like, you know, Super Mario World and Yoshi’s Island over and over again. Like, that’s what I was playing as a kid.”
Those are the only two games that she ever mentions playing as a kid. And she wasn’t playing them “over and over again”. Just watch her play any Mario game. It’s the worst Mario footage ever recorded. She also knows absolutely nothing about Yoshi’s Island and she’s really bad at the game.
58:00 – “Like, now I would, in my 30s, but I’m a different person when I was, like, 7 or 8.”
Yeah, you’re shaking down horntards now. That’s why you play these games. You didn’t suddenly become interested in video games in your 30s. This is all for the fucking videos. It’s all CLEARLY a scam. A scam that’s netting you less than $10,000/year from the MENTALLY RETARDED.
Why wasn’t she interested in video games as a teenager? Or even in her 20s? Why the sudden interest in video games when she was 30 and started her channel?
59:45 – Shout out to her fake asthma.
Well, I’m at the halfway point. The fake carpal tunnel syndrome is coming up in about ten minutes, I think. I might stop after that.
1:01:30 – She starts massaging her hands and wrists. “Do I remember the Virtual Game Boy? The Virtual Game Boy? That’s not ringing a bell.”
This will come up later.
“NewWaveJunkie says, ‘I had my best run of Friday the 13th the other day: three minutes and 14 seconds.’ Damn, dude. That’s great. Congratulations.”
That doesn’t raise any alarm bells with you, Erin? Three minutes and 14 seconds? Let me look up the world record.
Oh. It is plausible. I thought that he was making a joke.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5lgAWI6i7j4
1:01:45 – “Oh. Do you mean Virtual Boy? See, I thought Virtual Game Boy was like a website or something. Like, it seems like it would have been something maybe like in between, like, Ebaum’s World era and like the early Youtube era or something.”
We’re still building.
1:02:15 – “Yeah, like an emulator. I thought that it was something like that.”
Oh, sure you did, Erin. After you were prompted by the horntards. Because at first, you have no idea what he was talking about. Then you gave this insane answer about thinking that it was a WEBSITE. But once you’re prompted with the correct terminology, you decide that that’s what you really meant to say the whole time. She just “forgot”, I guess.
“But yeah, Virtual Boy…to this day, I’ve never tried a Virtual Boy.”
You don’t say.
1:06:00 – “Can I tell you guys what I had planned for Halloween but then I didn’t do it because I had the whole hand/wrist pain fiasco that I’m still dealing with but it was really bad in October?”
Here we go. A story about something that Erin DIDN’T do. These are great. And the reason she didn’t do this is because of an imaginary health condition.
“I was so pumped, I got the costume and everything, I was going to do the Buffy game for Gamecube.”
Oh. Who gives a fuck?
1:09:45 – She’s explaining why she hasn’t been uploading videos as frequently of late.
“This is going to sound crazy but I’m also, like, scared — like every time I play a game now, I’m, like, scared it’s going to destroy my wrists. Like, it sounds neurotic but the pain was so fucking bad, like, last year, I mean, last month, there were a few, like, days where I was, like, scared. I’m like, “This isn’t normal.”
You’re god damned right that it’s not, like, normal. It’s a serious, like, mental illness.
She’s already been to NUMEROUS doctors who have all told her that it’s NOTHING. There’s NOTHING wrong with her. But she keeps going. This is mental illness. People will create a fictitious illness or health condition and insist that they have it.
Typically, people will RESEARCH the health condition so that their story is more plausible but Erin doesn’t want to put the effort into that. So her story is completely ridiculous. And multiple doctors have told her this. “Get the fuck out of my office. I’m here to deal with REAL medical conditions. Stop wasting my fucking time.”
“So I’m like, I have, like, PTSD over this. Like, is this going to trigger the pain? Like, am I, like, squeezing the controller too much? Like, was I on my phone too much, like, for today?”
This is what she always cites as the problem: being on her phone too much. It’s not about video games, even by her own ridiculous story. She got carpal tunnel syndrome from using her PHONE too much. I think that she gives an insane explanation for this coming up.
“Like, I’m barely. Like, I’m trying so hard not to, like, touch my phone or any of this shit. It sucks because, like, now when I play games, I’m, like, scared to play it for leisure now and I’m like…I just…I’m only going to play games on stream or for a video until I get, like, I go to the dermatologist because I’m like, I just don’t want to chance it.”
This is the funniest thing that Erin has ever said. She’s eschewing playing games in her spare time now. From now on, she’s only going to play video games if it’s on stream, for money.
HOW IS THAT ANY DIFFERENT FROM WHAT SHE’S BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST FIVE YEARS? SHE DOESN’T PLAY FUCKING VIDEO GAMES AND NEVER HAS UNLESS IT WAS ON STREAM, FOR MONEY.
And did she say “dermatologist”? Is that who you go to for carpal tunnel syndrome? Let me look this up. That can’t possibly be right.
There’s something called a “dermatome” that might have some relation to carpal tunnel syndrome. It’s an area of the skin that has a lot of nerves in it or something. Maybe that’s what she was saying.
1:10:30 – “So that’s what I’ve been doing.”
Wasting multiple medical professionals’ time and Mike Matei’s money? Great. That’s a good use of your time, Erin.
I thought that she said something about the swiping motion of her phone triggering her carpal tunnel syndrome. Like when you swipe your phone to close an app or filter through hot chicks on Tinder or whatever. But I’m not finding it now. It’s either in a later section of this video or a different video or I completely made this up.
Oh, no. Here it is.
1:10:45 – “It seems that the things that bother me the most, it’s like editing, like if I’m using — even though it’s an ergonomic mouse, like doing a lot of, like, stuff like this.”
Then she makes an “awkwardly jerking a guy off” motion.
“So, like, if I edit too much or if I’m on my phone for more than like a few minutes at a time, like I can’t, like the scrolling, like, motion, I can’t do it.”
Oh do tell. And am I crazy or is she saying “like” WAY more than usual? Maybe this is a tell that she’s lying. But she’s always lying. So this doesn’t help. I suppose that she does always say “like”, though.
“And, of course, if I’m playing like a button-masher type game or something where the d-pad bothers me, that seems to not be good.”
Sounds terrible, Erin. Maybe it’s time to retire the channel.
“So far, like, knock on wood, I’m not, like, feeling too bad right now. Like, it feels okay to play this so I’m like, ‘okay’.”
Yeah, but why risk it? This is your health we’re talking about. You’re going to give yourself permanent wrist and hand injury for less than $10,000/year? That’s ridiculous. Nobody would do that. And you don’t even like video games. So this is a perfect excuse to stop the charade. Go get a fucking job like a normal person.
1:11:15 – “It’s just like so fucking weird.”
I’ll say.
Then she plays the game for another hour. That’s enough for me.
Let’s see what the horntards have to say for themselves.
– “The Computer Apocalypse was sketch. Was playing star ocean that day. As soon as we entered 2000, for some reason put down videogames for 10years(not proud of that lol)I was genuinely concerned. Had been a gamer, and beating Mario 1 & 2 since 4yrs old(1990), while my dad was dominating at the E3’s in Los Angeles. My relatives on both sides called me Nintendo. Made my first $10 beating Mario Bros. for my aunt at 5yrs. Any who. I’m gaming again & wanting to do a channel myself. Maybe raise money for y2k awareness. Y2k!? Not even once bro/sis”
That was clearly written by somebody with mental problems. These are the people giving this obvious fraud their money.