Gamer Girls

 https://www.twitch.tv/cannotbetamed

So Pam took the plunge and is streaming now.  Why?  Even she knows that she’s not good at this.  She said as much as recently as December 2020 on some podcast.

At 24:00 some guy asks if she ever considered streaming. “I don’t know. I can’t just be entertaining on my own, live, for hours.”

I discuss that podcast here:

https://gamergrrlsofficial.blogspot.com/2020/12/dbpg-power-hour-podcast-90-special.html

So what’s changed?  Well, her lesbian beard partner left her.  Maybe she has more time on her hands now.  Maybe she’s lonely.  Wants to hang out with the horntards.

Speaking of which, NewWaveJunkie is there front and centre.  How does he always know about this shit?  He’s closely following every gamer grrl he can find.  And he knows all of the new ones.  Some woman has been streaming for a week?  NewWaveJunkie is there.  

And how does he find the time to watch all of this shit?  Surely, these women have overlapping streaming schedules.  Does he have this all mapped out?  Does he have some sort of hierarchy?  If Erin is streaming at the same time as SupaPixelGirl, does he go with the Erin stream?  Does he later go back and watch the other stream?  

And how much masturbating does somebody need to do anyway?  He must be watching these streams for HOURS every day.  If it takes you that long, there’s something wrong with you or you’re doing it wrong.  Maybe see a doctor.

So Pam aka CannotBeEntertaining.  She’s AWFUL.  At least on Youtube.  And the Youtube stuff is scripted.  Let’s see just how boring she can be in her debut stream.  At least I think that this is her debut stream.  It’s the earliest one on her Twitch and it’s from nine days ago.  It’s called “Playing some NES games”.  And judging from her boring as fuck Twitter, she seems to have just recently got into this streaming shit.

Starts off with terrible sound problems.  It’s echoing and sounds like she’s underwater.

Yeah, this is definitely her first stream because she says, “Since my first NES review was Felix the Cat, I thought that I would start off with Felix the Cat.”

Somebody in the chat says, “Is it just me or is there a lot of echo?”  It’s not just you.

Then she fixes it quickly.  Good for her.  I think that she works in IT or something.

But then she loses the sound for the game.

Oh, I should mention this while boring as fuck Pam is trying to fix the sound issues.  The screen where Pam is takes up like 1/3 of the screen.  Most people have just a small video of them in the corner, right?  Some of the “titty streamers” will greenscreen themselves pretty big.  You know, they take up a lot of the screen because that’s what people are there for.  They’re there to look at tits, not video game footage.

That’s pretty close to what Pam is doing.  I mean, do we need her take up 1/3 of the screen?  Maybe she just couldn’t figure out how to re-size the screen.  Or she thought that this was a good layout.  Whatever.  I mean, NewWaveJunkie appreciates it.  He’s fully erect.

Then she gets it to work and takes a sip of her wine.  Because she’s a drunk.  She’s always drinking.  I get it, though.  Look at her life.  She should just pull herself together but whatever.

“I am drinking my favourite sour it is…”

Something.  I don’t even know what a fucking “sour” is.  

She talks about how she’s using…some emulator.  I don’t know if that’s frowned upon or not.  Erin always talks about how she uses “original hardware” because she thinks that nerds care about that shit but…I don’t think so.  

Then she says that you can just rewind with the trigger buttons “which makes it helpful if you die.”

I don’t think that she’s joking.  That would be fucking pointless, though.  Beating a game through, effectively, save scumming.  It’s fucking stupid.  Who would want to watch that?

“How was my day today?  My day today was a little frustrating.”

Oh fuck.  This is the level of questions that she’s fielding.  WHO GIVES A FUCK HOW YOUR DAY WAS?  Whoever asked that is even more boring than Pam.  

And then she’s going to actually give an answer.  The guy only asked because he didn’t know what the fuck to say.  He doesn’t actually want to hear about your problems.  Nobody does.

“How do people read chat and play video games at the same time?”

Maybe this isn’t for you, Pam.

There’s nothing really wrong with the stream.  She’s competent at the game.  She’s just so fucking boring.  She has nothing interesting to say.  It’s an angry, lonely woman being patronising to her horny “fans”.  Talking about her dog.  

The sound is fucked up again.  That’s good.

“I need save states.  I don’t want to play without save states.”

It’s just bad.  Does anybody want to watch somebody play a game with save states?  

I “beat” Punch-Out by saving after every successful little exchange.  But who the fuck would want to watch that?  

Somebody says, “Yea really need rewind and save state” and then two seconds later says, “Is this a speed run?”

Yeah.  It’s a speed run that uses save states.  What the fuck.  How stupid are these people?

And don’t speed runners have a fucking timer on the screen?

Somebody asks what her job is.  She works in IT for a health…something.  I’m surprised that she answered.

But good for Pam.  I’ve always been a big supporter of her working.  I think that she’s the only gamer grrl who I cover who has a job.  

I think that Pelvic Gamer had a job but lost it due to the “global pandemic”.  I don’t know if she’s subsequently found a job.  But I can’t fault her for that.  

And maybe…MAYBE Retro Ali has a job.  But I don’t think so.

And Destiny Fomo is a prostitute if you want to include that as a job.

But everyone else…no.  No job for Erin, Bobdunga…who am I missing…oh, Super Retro Gal but, again, she lost her job due to the “global pandemic”.  And I don’t think that John Riggs works either.

Somebody says, “I’ve had the word Pamsylvania stuck in my head for days now ugh”.  Ummm…okay.  Put your penis away and maybe it will go away.

Then she just starts talking about vaccinations.  I’m done.

These “do-gooders” who talk about how the sooner we all get vaccinated, the sooner things can get back to “normal” really annoy me.  How do they know that things are going to go back to “normal”?  Do they have some information that I don’t have?  

Why was the world shut down in the first place?  The fucking flu?  And everybody just went along with it.

Then the statistics started coming in.  Similar death rates to the flu.  Only the elderly are dying.  That’s the same as with the flu.  99+% recovery rate.  

And still people went along with it.  Once the data was coming in that this wasn’t exactly the Bubonic Plague, why did people still go along with this “lockdown” bullshit?  And these people will still defend it.  

What’s it going to take?  How low of a death rate do you need before these people will say, “Okay, I can leave my house now”?  

Then what will be next?  Whooping cough?  People will be whipped into a frenzy over whooping cough?  160,000 people died last year of whooping cough.  You could be next.

Will monkeypox come back?  What ever happened to monkeypox?  One minute, everyone in Africa was dying over this shit, the next minute we were on to the next news item.  Sars or whatever.  

And something like monkeypox, I’d actually be concerned about.  I don’t want to get fucking monkeypox.  Covered in sores and whatnot.  But covid?  Flu like symptoms?  WHO GIVES A FUCK?

But the world gets shut down over this and we all have to get vaccinated if we want to go back to “normal”.  No, fuck that.  How about we just go back to “normal” today.  What the fuck is the point of this?  

Somebody made a lot of money off of this.  

So Twitch.  Where do I stand on this?  

Destiny Fomo moved to Twitch.  Erin basically moved to Twitch.  Retro Ali is mostly on Twitch.  And now Pam aka CannotBeEntertaining is on Twitch.  

I’ve always thought, “If these gamer grrls just move to Twitch, I won’t be able to talk about them because I’m not going to review that shit.”  And it’s kind of right.  Especially like somebody with Madam Fomo who makes you pay to watch her Twitch videos.

But even without the paying issue, these Twitch videos are ephemeral.  They’re there for two weeks and then they’re gone.  I’m not going to waste my time reviewing that shit.

And the videos themselves are just boring.  It’s such low effort.  

Even somebody like Erin, who uploads (edited) versions of her streams, there’s not a whole lot to say.  “Oh, Erin said something stupid here.  Note the time stamp.”  It’s never anything interesting.

As long as these women are off of Youtube, that’s a victory.  Not that it has anything to do with me anyway.  They’re not going to be on Youtube forever whether I review their shitty videos or not.

But it does seem like they’ve cut down on their Youtube productivity in the past year.  Madam Fomo basically doesn’t make Youtube videos any more.  Pelvic Gamer and Bobdunga both went from weekly videos to basically monthly videos.  Retro Ali still uploads videos but seems to have given up on putting any effort into them.  Actually, maybe she never put effort into them.

And yeah, Erin is getting lax with the video schedule too, although not as bad as Bobdunga and Pelvic Gamer

Pam still uploads regularly, week after week, but it’s BORING AS FUCK.  

Let me skip around this Twitch stream.  See if she ever says anything even remotely interesting.

No.  Most of the time she’s not saying anything.  And when she does say something, it’s just her describing something that’s happening in the game. 

NewWaveJunkie starts spamming emojis of Erin for some reason.

It’s just boring.  I don’t know what I expected.  Maybe she can start berating her horny fans about the patriarchy.  That’s a sure fire way to increase views.