POWER BLADE on NES – Erin Plays

 https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONX-JuKtrMs

My channel turns four today, and what better way to celebrate than by releasing a new video?! Let’s review Power Blade on NES! Enjoy and thanks so much for the support over the years 🙂 

Don’t mention it, Erin.  I’m happy to help.

But look at this ridiculous description.  It’s her fourth year anniversary on Youtube so what better way to celebrate than to…release a new video?  That’s what she does every fucking week.  And actually, she missed last week.  So this is late.  

And without even starting the video, I’m going to guess that this is a just a compilation video of her recent Twitch streams where she played this game.  I haven’t even watched any of that shit, by the way.  I’ve pretty much given up on the Erin Plays Extras channel where she uploads stuff from Twitch.  She edits it to shit and it’s all boring as fuck.  

Finally, this video is five minutes and forty three seconds long.  So it’s significantly shorter than most of her videos.  

This is a ridiculously zero effort video.  A five minute clip show from some recent Twitch streams.  That’s the video that she’s releasing for this “special” occasion.  And she skipped last week’s video.

The good news is that she seems to have completely checked out.  Maybe that means that she’s going to shut down the channel soon.  Maybe she’s going to start looking for a job.  Maybe she’s going to have that difficult conversation with Mike where she admits that she was just using him for Youtube promotion.

Speaking of which, Mike promoted this video on his Twitter.

https://twitter.com/Mike_Matei/status/1345514373368963072

But who the fuck goes to Mike’s Twitter?

0:00 – “Hey guys!  So I finally got around to playing Power Blade on the NES.”

Yeah.  On stream, for money.  Why does she always leave this out?

“I bought this poor, discoloured cartridge years ago but for some reason I kept putting it off.”

Does anyone want to field this one?  It’s because you don’t fucking play video games, Erin.  Why did you buy this thing?  She bought it within the past four years, since she started her channel.  And she planned to turn it into “content”.  That’s it.  Why doesn’t she just say this?  Why does she try to portray herself as a “gamer” when it’s blindingly obvious that this is just all for “content”?  She does not play video games AT ALL unless it’s for “content”.  

Oh, by the way, yeah, this is just clips from her recent streams of this game.  

Then she name checks the Batman game and Vice Project Doom, two games that she played on stream, for money.

0:30 – “Especially Batman.  I freaking love that game.”

The only time that she ever played this game was for a Youtube video that she made YEARS ago and possibly for a Twitch stream.  She loves the game.  

2:15 – There are upgrades in this game so Erin says, “It’s kind of like getting whip power ups in Castlevania.”

Fucking unbelievable.  How many games have upgrades for your weapon?  Hundreds of thousands?  Millions?  But she thinks that this is something special.  And the game she compares it to is Castlevania, her favourite game series of all time, a game series that she has NEVER played in her spare time.  She only plays these games on stream, for money.

2:45 – She shows a clip of her getting lost in this game.  Why?  Why would she showcase her playing the game poorly?  

3:30 – More footage of her not knowing what she’s doing.  Because she never played this game before.  She’s showing you footage of her playing the game for the first and last time ever.  

Then she shows MORE clips of her not knowing what she’s doing.  There’s literally a clip of her saying, “I don’t know what to do.  This is so stressful.”

Why is she showing this?  I think the idea is that this is an example of the game being bad.  No.  YOU’RE BAD AT THE GAME.  You only played it ONE TIME in your entire life.  And it was on stream, for money.  And you’re shit at games.  Of course it’s not going to go well.  It’s not a fault of the game.

4:45 – “I like that hamburgers give you health in this game.”

Oh, cute food.  Fascinating.

“If only that was the case in real life.”

Well, I think you can eat hamburgers as part of a balanced diet.  What I don’t think works is stuffing your fat face with Big Macs every day.

I recently got down to my college weight.  All I did was keep track of my calories and not go over that calorie limit.  So I started at like 1200, which is pretty low.  Consult your doctor before taking diet advice from the GamerGrrls blog.  And then after I started getting close to my weight loss goal, I moved up to 1500.  And now that I’m at the goal, I shoot for eating between 1700 and 2000 calories a day.  

It took me about three months to lose 15 pounds and 15 pounds was my goal.  

So you can eat what you want.  I didn’t really change anything.  I started eating a bit more fruit but that’s it.  Oh, and I really cut down on sweets.  And I only drink water, but I was doing that anyway.  

But if you want a Big Mac, you can have a Big Mac.  It’s 562 calories.  That’s fine.  You can have fucking two of them if you want and still have calories left over.  

5:15 – “If I can do it, you definitely can.”

Well, that’s true.  She’s talking about how she beat the game.  At least she’s honest about her horrendous video game abilities.

So yeah.  This was an absolute shit video.  She didn’t even appear on camera (except in these Twitch clips).  

This is her big fucking four years on Youtube extravaganza video?  

So Joe from Gamesack is the top comment.  

– “Congrats on 4 years! It’ll be 5 soon. Then 10. Then 30.”

Erin says, “Thank you! I . . . I think. 😰”

But yeah, he’s just coming on to her.  Women like funny guys.  Well, not really.  

– “Happy anniversary to your channel! Badass content as always!”

I assume that he meant “bad content”.

– “Ehhhhh, does her voice just hurt your ears? Why do her videos keep popping up?”

Where is he seeing these videos?  Maybe he follows Mike on Twitter.

– “A great game and much better than the Famicom version for sure. Did you try the nice little trick that after you go into the door of the boss room you can hit the grenade button for a one hit kill for most bosses?”

Erin says, “I didn’t know that!”

You don’t say.  Lee Fischer must be a total fucking moron if he hasn’t yet picked up on the fact that Erin only plays these games on stream, for money.

– “The only girl gamer channel I watch. Part of it is because Mike Matei brought me here and the other part because she actually plays retro games, unlike other yotubers who only play the new and big games to get views on their channels.”

Is that right?  No, Retro Ali plays 8 and 16 bit games.  It’s on Twitch but she uploads them to Youtube.  So same as what Erin does.  You can check them out right here:

https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCmlcQuuJBat4gUKfhqW58vg/videos

And unlike Erin’s shit videos, Ali publishes them unedited and includes the chat.  I also think that she uploads all of her Twitch content to Youtube.  There’s a lot that Erin doesn’t upload to Youtube.

Of course, Ali’s videos are completely unwatchable but she is in fact playing retro video games.  

Bobdunga…no.  Pam aka CannotBeEntertaining…no.  MadamFomo…no.  PelvicGamer…no.  

So I guess he’s kind of right.  Not many women stream old games.  Well, at least as far as I know.  It’s not something that I look for.  I basically only deal with six or so gamer grrls.  I’m sure if you go on Twitch, you’ll find some.  Or look shit up on Youtube.

– “For the love of god will you and Mike make more streams together where you use lots of sexual puns, innuendos, and everything else that is possibly sexual which lies under god’s green earth?! We need more SEX in this society and are all hard-up and isolated and deprived from this virus wreaking havoc on our sex lives.”

This doesn’t require further comment from me.

– “In my old age, I have completely lost patience with “where the hell do I go” games. I played Neutopia on TG16 recently and immediatly downloaded overworld maps. Fight me lol”

She doesn’t know what that game is.  Are you fucking insane?

– “Erin, I got to your channel through Adam the Woo, odd right! He ran into supervideogamegal, she lead me here. Strange how youtube works sometimes. Happy 4th Anniversary!”

Yeah.

– “Erin is the hot chick that can still beat you but in certain games anytime she talks my heart melts luv ya girl 🥰”

Questions abound.  What game is Erin possibly beating anyone at?  And in what universe is Erin “hot”?

– “I’m single 😥😥😥😥😥”

Then somebody replies, “You’ll find someone eventually. Here’s some advice: learn to love yourself first. Also, why are you saying this in the comments to a video about Nintendo games?”

I found it amusing.

– “If it wasn’t for your socials I would have missed your 4th anniversary video. YouTube didn’t put this on my subscriptions page.”

Yeah, a lot of people are saying this.  Maybe Youtube flagged this shit for spam.  That’s basically whath this is.  This is complete trash.  She’s just making a clip show from her Twitch streams.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *