Gamer Girls

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pC4RkOyT8Dg

Wow.  248 views after four years.  It’s not often that I get to review a channel that’s less popular than the Gamer Grrls blog.

I checked out some of her other videos.  It’s not even a video game channel.  Most of her videos are about her tattoos, and how “alternative” she is, and that she’s a mother.  Indeed, her latest video is her urinating on baking soda.  It has something to do with her latest pregnancy.  Download that one to your spank bank.

It’s just sad.  People with no personality, defining themselves by their stupid Disney tattoos.  “Ooh, look at Ariel.  So cute!”

And as for having children, people have been doing this since times immemorial.  It’s hardly an achievement.

I mean, I get it.  Something pretty big came out of you.  It is kind of impressive.  I had the same sense of pride when I took a dump so big that it almost hit the rim of the toilet.  But that was 20 years ago.  If I went around still telling this story, people would think that I’m insane.  But for some reason, it’s socially acceptable to endlessly talk about childbirth.

Anyway, let’s check out this stupid Q&A.

0:00 – She wrote the list on a paper towel.  And it’s a really crumpled paper towel.  What was she doing with this?  Why does she not have paper?  And if she doesn’t have paper, couldn’t she just write it on a Word document or on her phone?  This is from 2016 but most people had decent smart phones back then.  Also, there was definitely paper in those days.  Paper is one of man’s earliest inventions.  I believe the Chinese invented it.

“What was the first game you remember playing?”

Oh do tell.  I’ll just give my answers because nobody gives a fuck about anyone’s answers to this shit.  Sid Meier’s Pirates.

Oh, her fucking answer was Super Mario Bros.  My answer was way better.  The first game I actually played was probably an Atari 2600 game but I don’t remember because who gives a shit?  But the first PC game was Pirates.

Fucking Super Mario Bros?  Vanilla bullshit.

Oh, but then she pulls back to show her tits.  So it’s not all bad.

She also says “bros” instead of “brothers”.  Because idiots today don’t understand that “bros” is an abbreviation for “brothers”.

0:30 – “How old were you when you first started playing video games?”

She doesn’t even answer this.  She just moves on to the next question.  Weird.

0:45 – “What is a fond memory you have about gaming?”

None.  I wasted my life on this shit.  I’m not fucking sitting there playing JJ & Jeff, in semen-encrusted underpants, with drool dripping off my chin, thinking, “Oh yeah…radical…I’m really kicking life’s ass right now.”

But she claims that she has a lot.  She has to actually narrow it down.  She went to a convenience store as a kid, with her cousin, and they played Super Street Fighter II.  What a story.  That’s one to tell your grandchildren.  “When I was your age, Billy, I used to go to the convenience store and play Super Street Fighter II.”  “Gee, grandma.  Your stories really suck.”

2:15 – Then a weird edit.  Now it’s a close up shot, her arm is in an odd position, and she’s answering the question about how old she was when she first played a video game.

2:45 – “What retro game would you love to see put in a movie?”

I’ll say Tetris.

She says The Legend of Zelda.  Boy, she certainly played some obscure games.

Oh, I should have mentioned.  This video is flipped.  I don’t know why.  So it’s hard to read what her shirt says because it’s a reverse image.

3:30 – “Three all time favourite games and why.”

I’ll say who gives a fuck?

She says Final Fantasy VII.  She says that she would play it until she passed out.  That can’t be healthy.

Oh, she even says, “I don’t know if that’s healthy.  Probably not.”

Then Super Mario 3.

Then Skate or Die.

5:45 – She shows her tits some more.  A good way to distract from the fact that she chose an obviously stupid game for her third choice.

7:15 – She shows her tits again.  She also encourages the viewer to create their own video answering these questions.

Were people still doing this in 2016?  Video responses?  I’m not sure.

Anyway, it seems that nobody did it.